


Give Me A Ring Sometime

by WinchestersRaven, ZRobnett, ZRobnett2



Series: give me a ring [2]
Category: Castiel - Fandom, Dean Winchester - Fandom, Supernatural, destiel - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blow Jobs, Bottom Castiel, Bottom Castiel/Top Dean Winchester, Bottom Dean, Complete, F/M, M/M, Oral Sex, Sex Toys, Slow Burn, Smut, Switching, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, no one dies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-23
Updated: 2015-07-31
Packaged: 2018-03-25 10:02:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 88,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3806335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinchestersRaven/pseuds/WinchestersRaven, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZRobnett/pseuds/ZRobnett, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZRobnett2/pseuds/ZRobnett2
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>***This is complete now. I do however plan on going through as soon as possible and fix all the tenses. Please bare with me.***<br/>Castiel and Dean get married when they are 19 after a night of heavy drinking in Las Vegas. It's an impulsive thing that Cas barely remembers in the morning. After they break up Cas moves off to college and never gives it a second thought, thanks to his parents telling him it wasn't legal. Ten years later after his fiance' Balthazar presses him to set a date they go to get their marriage license and he finds out the marriage to Dean is indeed legal.  Cas, determined that he is happy with Balthazar and marrying him is what he wants; packs a bag and goes to Poughkeepsie to get Dean to sign divorce papers. Dean however is not going to make it easy on Cas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. That's What You Get For Waking Up In Vegas

**Author's Note:**

> Inspiration came from a prompt in a group I am a part of.
> 
> Things to know about this story.  
> I based my Cas' attitude on End!verse Castiel.  
> Cas & Dean grew up in Poughkeepsie, New York  
> Following Canon Dean's birthday this story takes place in 2008.  
> The birthday I'm using for Castiel is Jimmy Novak's of July 10th but, the year is different to make him the same age as Dean.  
> The Sam and Jess relationship is only mentioned and does not actually play a part in the story.

Castiel Novak stood in line with his fiancé at the courthouse to get their marriage license. Zar had been pressing for a few months to set a date. So here they were in a stuffy courthouse office waiting. Cas had attended college and became a producer like his father wanted. He met Zar when his father was producing Balthazar’s (Zar) band Fallen Angels next record.

The attraction was instant. Zar was fucking gorgeous, funny, and full of life. And his accent drove Cas wild. They started off as just friends. Then friends with benefits when they moved into a penthouse together. Two years ago, they started officially dating. A year later Balthazar popped the question.

It pleased Castiel’s family when he told them about the upcoming wedding. Not that they exactly approved of Castiel’s lifestyle. But, Zar came from old money and apparently that was good enough for the rest of the Novak clan. Cas didn’t really give a shit though. Money wasn’t life’s answer to everything.

“Novak, Milton party,” called an older woman seated behind a desk. She had on a tailored suit, which looked out-of-place for a courthouse. But, who was Cas to speculate on fashion? She had her hair slicked back into a tight bun. Cas couldn’t help but, think there had to be a stick shoved up her ass so deep it couldn’t be found.

“Cassie, come on,” Balthazar said as he pulled him to the left of the room.

“How may I help you, gentlemen, today,” she asked, not really looking at them.

“What a way to make this feel like a dentist appointment,” Cas said under his breath, but, apparently loud enough for Zar to hear. Which earned him a quick nudge to his leg. Cas rolled his eyes and sat back.

“We would like to apply for a marriage license, darling,” Zar replied.

The woman, Naomi Eldridge by the name plaque, handed them paperwork to fill out and asked for their driver’s licenses and birth certificates.

“Fill these out completely,” Naomi said, her voice sounded almost bored.

“Isn’t she a fucking ray of sunshine? I wonder if she farts rainbows and shits unicorns as a second job.” Cas commented again only loud enough for Zar to hear.

“Cassie!” Zar admonished and shot him a glare. Cas sighed, wiped the sweat from his hands and filled the paper out. He felt a headache form and pinched the bridge of his nose. He sighed, then continued just to get it over with. Okay so yes, he was happy they were getting married soon. It’s just he wanted to wait another year or so.

Twenty minutes later Castiel handed the paperwork over and waited. When Naomi walked away from the desk. Zar looked over at him.

“Would you act like you want to be here Cassie?” Zar grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze. “You’re sweating like a whore in church.”

“Right now I’d rather be a whore in church. At least that means I’ve been laid recently,” Cas deadpanned.

“Cassie seriously love!” Zar said irritation in his voice. Then a wicked smile crossed his face, “I’ll make it up to you when we get home.”

Cas leaned over to Zar’s ear and whispered, “Oh, I know you will. I plan on fucking you six ways from Sunday as soon as we get the hell out of here.” He pulled back and gave Zar a look. One that meant Cas wasn’t joking. Zar opened his mouth to say something when Naomi sat back down at the desk.

“I’m quite confused here,” Naomi started. “Mr. Novak we pulled up a current marriage record on file in Las Vegas.”

Cas’ mouth went dry, “Vegas?”

“To a Mr. Dean Winchester,” Naomi replied, making eye contact for the first time.

“Fuck my life,” Cas said and that time everyone in the office could hear him.

* * *

**10 years ago**

They had arrived early that morning and checked into a hotel that he booked for the stay in Vegas. Several hours later Cas hit the Las Vegas strip with a few good friends, Dean, Benny, and Ash, from High School. The trip was a birthday gift from his parents before attending college for the fall semester. His dad had given him the credit card and told him to have fun. Cas’ brother gave him a list of places he frequented that would not ID him, or anyone with him simply because of the Novak name.

The first club on their list was Body English. A line wrapped around the building. Cas avoided the wait, went to the bouncer and flashed his ID. The tall guy spoke something into a headset and they were ushered in from a line of people vocalizing their irritation. Inside the place was packed and the music was loud. The perfect place to unwind, well at least in Cas’ opinion.

Cas found several good-looking men to dance with. However, they weren’t as much fun as Dean was when he drank. Dean searched him out on the dance floor and pulled some random guy off Cas. He wound his arms around Cas’ waist and locked eyes with him. They dance up against each other with no space between them. Lips teasing, tongues dancing in each other’s mouths, and hands roaming the other’s body. You couldn’t tell where one man ended and the other began.

As the night wore on they found themselves talking about what they wanted out of life. Cas always wanted to cook. He liked creating with his hands. That got Dean talking about how it would be neat to open a little deli together back home. Say screw the parents and their dreams for them. Cas agreed. They kissed passionately and had a few more shots. By two am they didn't know how they had ever lived their lives apart from each other and they grabbed Benny and Ash as their witnesses and stumbled to the nearest wedding chapel to make it all official. Cas vaguely remembers the rest of the night.

The next morning he woke up to find not only Dean in his bed but a ring on his finger.

Cas jumped out of bed, "shit! Shit! Shit! Dean! Dean! Wake up!"

Dean lazily stretched and pulled him back to bed, "what’s got you so riled?"

Cas flopped over on Dean and attempted to get back up, finally he settled next to Dean locked under his arm. He shoved the wedding band in Dean's face, "Dean! Look. We got married!"

Dean smiles a slow smile, "yeah... we did" and snuggled up to Cas and the pillow. Cas pulled the pillow out from under Dean's head thinking he must still be half asleep or hungover and hit him with it.

"Dean! We can't be married!!"

Dean sat up brow furrowed and pointed at his ring, "yea well... looks like we are Cas so..."

Cas, flustered he ran his hand through his hair. "Dean. This was a mistake. There's no way I married you on purpose!" As soon as the words left his mouth, he regretted them, but it was too late. He said them.

Dean looked at him like he had slapped him in the face. He got up and threw on his jeans. Grabbed up his t-shirt and boots and stormed toward the door.

"Dean...”

Dean’s last words rang in Cas' head "Screw you Cas!"

He heard the hotel door click, but it sounded like a resounding boom in the quiet hotel room.

When they arrived back home Cas’ parents were furious. They drilled it into Cas’ head the marriage wasn’t legal and that he needed to focus on college. Cas nodded and agreed and followed where they told him to go. He didn't really look back.

* * *

**Present Day**

Zar didn’t talk to Cas on the way home from the courthouse. He was pissed and Cas could feel it lingering on him. When they arrived at their penthouse Zar immediately grabbed the bottle of wine, a large wine glass and poured himself a drink.

Cas sat down on the couch and put his head back. He waited for Zar’s impending freak-out. Cas felt the cushion beside him move with body weight. So he turned his head and watched Zar closely.

“Cassie… tell me darling… how does one forget they’re married,” Zar asked. His voice calm but, anger clearly evident in it.

Cas groaned ran his hand over his face. “Zar I was nineteen, drunk, and in Vegas. You know the saying what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.”

“This is not the time for your tasteless humor.”

“What the fuck do you want me to say Zar? I got married on a whim while drunk.” Cas shifted and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I didn’t think it was legal. We broke up the next fucking morning Zar. I freaked. He left. My dad smoothed it over... or I thought he did. End of story."

Zar rolled his eyes "Clearly not end of story, darling."

Cas should have a Ph.D. in dealing with his fiancé’s fits (even if this one WAS a bit justified). He got up and slid over to Zar. He laced his hands around his neck behind him on the couch, "Zar... Balthy... I didn't think about it because he isn't even important... I never even thought of him again...”

That was a lie, a small one, but, a lie nonetheless. The only time Cas thought of Dean is when he was about to fall asleep sometimes, or slightly drunk, or when he felt nostalgic. Or when he was in the shower and his mind started to drift. His hand would travel down his body and its Dean’s face that appeared, those green eyes coming into focus as he stroked himself and would linger after his orgasm. Ok… so if he was being honest. He thought about Dean a lot. But honesty was overrated. Especially in the music industry.

"Mmm, you best take care of it soon Mon Cher." Zar purred.

Cas kissed the top of his head, but his thoughts were elsewhere "I will.”

* * *

**One week later Poughkeepsie, New York**

Reg: The dissolution of marriage of one Castiel Novak from one Dean Winchester

Married June 10th 1998 Las Vegas Nevada Novak requests an amicable divorce on the grounds that both parties were not of sound mind and body...

Dean cursed out loud, "son of a bitch! Not of sound mind and... Sam!!! Get in here!!"

His brother, Sam, came in the office from the back room. "What's wrong Dean?"

Dean frantically waved the paper around, “what the hell does this mean?"

Sam was a lawyer, a damn good one, but he usually had to be able to see what was written on the paper to know what something meant. He snatched the papers out of his older brother’s hands and read them over. He looked at his brother with pity, "Dean. You had to know this day was coming."

"Just shut up and tell me what it all means," Dean barked.

"It's saying that Cas wants a divorce because you guys were both too drunk to know any better 10 years ago."

Dean ran a hand through his hair and sat down sadly. "Does he have a case? Can he do that?"

"Dean... Maybe you should just... let him go. It’s been ten years. If he was going to come around…"

"Does he have a case Sammy,” Dean asked.

Sam shook his head “Well... I mean. No. Not if you fight him. It’s been over 5 years, so annulment is off the table. Plus, you two DID consummate your marriage. And you both were legal adults. The fact that you were drunk is actually irrelevant because you weren't old enough to be drunk. It’s a bullshit loophole, but... it’s a loophole."

Dean grabbed the paper back from Sam and smiled. "I'll take it. Thanks, Sammy." He took out a black magic marker and wrote over the words in bold print NO and his phone number. He folded it up and sent it back to the address provided.

* * *

**Cas and Zar’s Penthouse a week later**

Cas walked into the kitchen after he changed out of his work clothes. He grabbed a glass and poured straight whiskey on the rocks. The kitchen was stainless steel with updated appliances. The rest of the penthouse color scheme was dark grays and blacks. There were expensive paintings hung on every wall. All Zar’s ideas, of course. He was the one who had a flair for that stuff. Cas was a more laid back, jeans and t-shirt kind of guy. Frankly he couldn’t care less about what furniture was in their place. The one piece of art Cas liked was the painting Zar had commissioned. It depicted Cas with huge black angel wings.

Cas walked out on the balcony and sat down to look at the beautiful view of the city. They were on the 20th floor which made Cas feel like he was flying.

“Cassie we’ve received the divorce papers back,” Zar said as he sat down by Cas. “We have a problem.”

“What kind of problem Zar,” Cas asked, taking another drink of the whiskey.

Zar met Cas’ eyes, “he said no.”

“What do you mean he said no?” Disbelief dripped from his words.

“I mean he said no darling… he wrote NO in giant letters and his phone number.” Zar leaned a little closer to Cas. “How drunk were you again?”

“Zar I was beyond smashed.” Cas grabbed the papers out of Zar’s hands and scanned them. Sure enough, in bold black marker was the word no and Dean’s phone number. Cas got up and walked through the living room into the kitchen. He grabbed a shot glass. Cas needed more whiskey for this. Zar had followed Cas and watched him.

Cas slammed the shot back and let the burn travel down his throat. Finally, Cas turned and looked at Zar. “Damn it... I’m gonna have to go to Poughkeepsie.”


	2. New York State of Mind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Sorry by Buckcherry  
> 

_Cas stretched out in bed. A strong tan arm slid up his body. He turned to face the body and realized it was Dean. His Dean. This is wrong, his mind shouted. But his body didn't listen. Dean smiled warmly._

_"Hiya Cas, miss me?"_

_Cas sighed, "Desperately."_

_He locked his hand behind Dean’s neck and pulled him near. He tugged on his bottom lip with his teeth. His mouth sought entrance. He moaned as Dean finally opened his mouth to him with a smile, inching his body still closer to Cas as he kissed him. His tongue dove inside Dean's mouth, tasting the sweet reminder of days long past. His body shifted, hips jutting forward grinding himself against Dean's erection._

_"I want you Cas," Dean whispered._

_Cas rolled Dean onto his stomach. He arched one leg up and slid effortlessly into Dean's tight ass. Draping his body over the full length of him, he entwined his hand in Deans and kissed his face. He rocked his hips forward and moaned. From under him, Dean was panting, "Yes... Cas... yes." Cas' hand slid down to grip his bent leg and he drove in deeper he was thrusting and panting. He was so close. The name of his lover on his lips..._

"Cassie...wake up!"

Cas startled awake, naked, cock in hand, "shit!"

Zar raised an eyebrow and kissed the tip of his dick, "that better of been me you were fucking. Now get up. You have to go invade that godforsaken town of Poughkeepsie.” 

Cas growled and pulled Zar in bed. Zar laughed, "or... it can wait five minutes? From the looks of you, this won't take long," his mouth descended on Cas' swollen erection. 

Cas dropped his head back in frustration and came soon after.

* * *

Twenty minutes later: Cas was trying to pack his bags. He ran around the room, checking to make sure he has everything he needs. Zar watched Cas as he ran from one room to the other. He walked over, leaned against the baby grand piano and swirls his drink.

"Darling, really what ARE you doing?"

Cas stopped and put two fingers to each of his temples then shrugged, "I don't even know. What does one take to nowheresville?"

"I'm sure I don't know. Certainly not any dreams or prospects." Zar laughed at his own joke as he sipped his drink.

"Hey... I grew up there okay"

Zar set down his drink and pulled Cas down on his lap on the piano bench. "I was only joking Mon Amour. That town must have something good to offer. It gave me you." He kissed Cas' nose.

Cas leaned his body into Zar and laid his head on his shoulder. “I didn't mean to snap at you Balthy. I'm just... God. I haven't gone home since I left for college. I think I just agreed to never look back"

Zar wrapped his arms around him and nuzzled Cas’ neck, "I’m sorry this little piss-ant is making it hard for you. Just go there, be the tough negotiator I know you are. Get that contract signed then come home to me, to our bed… because it will be empty and lonely with you gone."

Cas petted Zar’s head for a minute, looked around their penthouse and sighed. "Okay... I gotta go. I'll just pack some clothes. Whatever else I need I can pick up there. Now kiss me and stop trying to turn me on. I'm on to your tricks," Cas smiled and tilted Zar's head up.

Zar stuck out his lip in a fake pout, "you’re no fun when you’re like this." Then he kissed Cas and lightly shoved him off his lap. Cas got up and moved to get his things.

Zar  shouted from the living room, "oh, and darling, don't forget to call my agent. He wants to talk to you about some tour thing for me." He waved his hand in the air gesturing at nothing. 

Cas nodded distractedly. He grabbed his bags and walked to the door. He grabbed the door handle and paused. Cas looked back over at Zar and said, “kisses.”

“Love and kisses darling, hurry home,” Zar said as he looked out over the New York skyline. 

* * *

Cas stopped at a gas station along the way to get gas and grab snacks. Back in the car he grabbed a bag of chips and opened them. He had bought beef jerky, crackers, cheese whiz, a dill pickle and Pepsi to wash it down. Cas pulled out and got back on the road. Every mile closer his stomach clenched, and his heart pounded. He turned on the radio to distract himself. He couldn’t focus on anything around him. Cas just stared at the road in front of him.

 **Oh I had a lot to say was thinking on my time away**  
**I missed you and things weren't the same**  
**Cause everything inside it never comes out right**  
**And when I see you cry it makes me want to die**  
**I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue, I'm sorry about all things I said to you**  
**And I know I can't take it back**  
**I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds, and baby the way you make my world go round**  
**And I just wanted to say I'm sorry**

 **This time I think I'm to blame it's harder to get through the days**  
**You get older and blame turns to shame**  
**Cause everything inside it never comes out right**  
**And when I see you cry it makes me want to die**  
**I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue, I'm sorry about all things I said to you**  
**And I know I can't take it back**  
**I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds, and baby the way you make my world go round**  
**And I just wanted to say I'm sorry**  
**Every single day I think about how we came all this way**  
**The sleepless nights and the tears you cried it's never too late to make it right**  
**Oh yeah sorry!**  
**I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue, I'm sorry about all things I said to you**  
**And I know I can't take it back**  
**I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds, and baby the way you make my world go round**  
**And I just wanted to say I'm sorry**  
**I’m sorry**  
**Baby**  
**I’m sorry**  
**Baby**  
**Yea**  
**I’m sorry**

Cas turned down the radio,” Fuckin A,” he said and hit the steering wheel with his hand.

* * *

Cas pulled out in front of a bar when he arrived in town. He looked up at the name _Love Bites_ and shook his head. He walked inside, smoke lingered in the air, and music played in the background. Behind the bar was his old friend Benny Lafitte. A wave of nostalgia hit him and he smiled as he walked to over to the man.

“What’ll have brotha,” Benny asked not looking up.

“A shot of whiskey.”

At the sound of Cas’ voice, Benny raised his head. “Novak, well this is a surprise. The wayward son has finally decided to grace us with his presence.” Benny moved around, grabbed a shot glass and poured the amber liquid into it. “After you married Dean and hightailed it out of here I didn’t think you would ever return.”

Cas winced at his words, “Taking sides are we, Benny?”

“Nah, brotha. I think it’s fucked up you left Dean. But I’m more pissed that you left all of us and didn’t look back.” He slid the glass over to Cas. “Couldn’t even send a damn postcard once in a while.”

Cas tipped the shot back and placed the glass back on the bar. “I’m sorry man,” he said then looked over at the man behind the bar.

“Nah, you’re not. You got out of here and judging by that car you pulled up in, made yourself a good life.”

Cas nodded and tapped the shot glass for another round. Benny obliged and asked, “so what brings you back to our neck of the woods?”

“I’m getting married-,” Cas started.

“You’re already married, Novak,” Benny interrupted. 

Cas took a deep breath and released it. He knew he wouldn’t get a welcome home parade, but he didn’t expect a hard time either. Cas pinched the bridge of his nose, “I know, that’s why I’m here. To get these divorce papers signed.”

“There’s a thing called the United States Postal Service, ever heard of it?”

“Oh, you got jokes do you?” Cas smiled a little, “I sent the damn papers to him.”

“And?”

“And he sent them back with a big NO wrote across them and his number. His own personal fuck you.”

Benny leaned against the bar and looked Cas straight in the eyes and laughed, “Do you blame him, Novak?”

Cas ran a hand over his face and didn’t answer the question. Instead, he motioned for another shot. Benny poured it and once again slid it over. Cas slammed it back and asked, “Where is he these days?”

“Up the road at the Winchester Deli.” Benny gave him a side glance, “and now that you’ve had your liquid courage, get the hell outta my bar.” Benny smiled and went to the backroom.

Cas laid some money on the bar to pay for his drinks and left

* * *

Cas left the bar and walked up the road to the deli since it was pointless to drive. He didn’t immediately go in. Instead, he stood back and watched the man behind the counter move with ease. He knew with his Aviator sunglasses, unshaved face, and shorter hair, he wouldn’t be recognized from this distance.

Sure he was stalling and he knew it but, he couldn’t quite pull open the door yet. If he did it would open a door to his past that he thought was shut for good. _“What the actual fuck? Suck it the up and grow some balls,”_   he thought to himself.

  
He watched Dean interact with a customer. Cas was amazed after ten years Dean still looked very much like the young man he once knew. Dean captivated him and he stood there motionless as if in a dreamlike state. Another customer was talking to Dean and Cas watched as Dean threw his head back in a full body laugh.

  
The door opened and an elderly couple walked out, Dean following close behind them. The woman smiled at him, leaned forward and placed a kiss on his cheek. Then the couple turned and walked away. Dean smiled in their direction and waved, then as he turned around Cas knew he saw him.  
Cas heard Dean say something which sounded almost like fuck under his breath. Then he watched the man as he straightened up and slapped on a smile.

“Well, as I live and breathe, my prodigal husband has returned,” Dean said in a fake southern accent. Then he frowned, “You cut your hair.”

  
Cas tried to calm himself but, when he spoke he sounded irritated, “A lot has changed Dean. And I’m not your husband.”  
Dean looked him over a smiled, “The state of Nevada says you are, Novak.” With that said Dean turned on his heel and walked into the deli.

  
Cas followed him. There were a couple of customers at a table. His eyes scanned the interior. The walls were a light blue and there were several license plates hung on the wall. A picture of Dean’s mother Mary hung on a wall near the register. His eyes finally fell on Dean whose back was turned toward him.

“Dean, we need to talk...”

  
“You look like you could use a sandwich.” Dean said and moved around the small area behind the counter. “I’m gonna make you a sandwich.”

  
“Dean, I don't want a sandwich, I want...” Cas rubbed the back of his neck. “Dean, can we talk for a second?”

  
“Come on, it’s your favorite, Pastrami on rye with Swiss, and just one dill pickle,” Dean said and winked at Cas.

  
That stopped Cas’ train of thought for a moment. “How the hell do you remember that after ten years?” Cas ran a hand through his hair and felt his frustration as it grew.

  
“I remember everything damn thing after ten years, Cas, do you,” Dean asked and locked eyes with him.

A feeling of sincerity fell over Cas. He quickly snapped out of it and said, “Dean, that’s not the point. That was a fucking decade ago. Why do you refuse to sign the divorce papers?”

  
“Oh, would you look at that, my shifts over,” Dean said over his shoulder as he walked toward the door. “You’ll have to wait till later, or follow me to the bar.” Before he walked out he turned around and winked. Then Dean pushed the door open and walked out. Cas sat down frustrated and ate his damn sandwich. In walked Garth for his shift and gave Cas a smile. The smile said he knew exactly what Dean was up to. 

* * *

Cas left the deli in a huff. Damn him. He needed to get these papers signed and get out of here. Seeing Dean was setting off all kinds of triggers in his head that he didn't need. His life was simple. He was in control. Well, mostly. Okay, his life wasn't perfect, but it was his. Cas has worked really hard to get it where it was and one stupid, wonderful, DRUNKEN NIGHT wasn't going to change that. He stomped into Love Bites.

Benny was wiping down a counter, "Back so soon. Don't you city boys drink water?"

"I'm looking for Dean?"

"Oh... you mean your husband? If I had a dime for every time someone came barging through that door angrily looking for their husband." Benny chuckled.

Cas massaged his head, "Benny, Where is he?"

Benny shrugged, "Beats me, brother. He ain't here. I'd try the hospital. He likes to go there sometimes and sing to the sick kids."

Cas' mouth dropped open, "Jesus. He’s a fucking saint"

"Pretty much. Need another drink?”

Cas shook his head no and headed out.

At the hospital a few blocks down, he goes to find out where the children’s ward is.

"Well, well... if it isn't Castiel in the flesh.”

Cas looked up to see Meg, a girl he knew in high school. They had a brief fling but it didn't work out because she had a huge crush on this jock named Lucif and Cas had a crush on Dean. She was wearing pink scrubs and white running shoes.

He smiled, "Meg. How are you? I never pegged you for a nurse."

She shrugged, “who knew, I have a soft spot for children. What brings you creeping around these parts?"

"I’m looking for Dean."

She arched her eyebrow into her hairline and leaned against the wall crossing her arms. "Aren't you about a decade late?"

Cas dropped his arms to his side. "Not you too Meg. Come on. You of all people know how much I had to get out of this fucking town."

She nodded, "I knew. No, judgment. Just wondering why you’re here now looking for Dean?"

"I need a divorce. He won't give it to me. And he won’t talk to me and he seems to be dodging me. So I’m chasing him all over this damn town looking for him.”

Meg laughed, “That's Dean. Never could let anything go. Well, he's not here. He was. But I sent him home because the kids aren't up for visitors today." She dropped her voice lower and whispered "Chemo day. Did you try the...”

"If you say the animal shelter, I might scream."

Meg laughed again. "No, Dean’s never been much for animals. I was just going to say, he's a volunteer firefighter so he might be there."

Cas turned and hit his head against the wall and stayed there a minute talking to the wall. "Of course he is."

She shrugged again, "He likes to keep busy"

Cas stood up. "I'm beginning to see that. Okay, well thanks, Meg. I'll uh, I'll see you around."

She winked at him, "I married Lu by the way, but I'm still gonna watch as you walk away"

Cas shook his head, same old Meg.

Cas left the hospital. He stood outside and then threw his head back and laughed at the absurdity of this. _“So let’s do a_ checklist _,”_ Cas thought. _“He runs his own Deli and everyone in town seems to love him. In his fucking spare time, he hits the bar where everyone knows his name, he sings to sick kids and he is a volunteer fireman, where he probably rescues kittens from fucking trees.”_

  
Cas sat down on a bench outside the hospital. He suddenly needed to talk to someone as screwed up as he felt he was. He pulled out his cell to call Zar but made another unpleasant discovery.

"There is no signal in this god-forsaken town!!" He put his head in his hands.

“‘fraid not. It’s a bitch. Cas, is that you?"

Cas looked up and he actually smiled, "Charlie Bradbury. You’re the first damn face I've wanted to see in this town."

"Yea, then how come I'm not being hugged?"

Cas smiled and got up and hugged her, “How have you been?”

"Screw how I've been. I live here. How have YOU been? Cas, It’s been like, forever. I missed the hell out of you. And Dean, have you saw Dean yet?"

  
Cas sighed and rubbed his temple again. "Oh yes. I have. Charlie, can you explain to me, why it’s so difficult for him to just accept that it really was a lifetime ago, and just sign these damn divorce papers?"

"OH, divorce papers, so that's why you’re in town. Yea. He’s not gonna do that Cas." She linked her arm in Cas' and started walking with him down the street.

"What? Why?"

"Well, because. Because to Dean, a lifetime's not that long. But it’s okay. You can stay with me tonight"

Cas smiled and shook his head. Charlie had that way of making you smile even when you wanted to punch things. "Charlie. That’s not going to fix things, but I appreciate the offer. I think I'm done playing, hide-and-seek with Dean for the night. Do you have a phone?"

  
Charlie laughed and laid her head on Cas' shoulder. "Yes, I have a phone." She looked up at Cas, "In ten years... I thought you would have grown taller." 

* * *

At Charlie’s house, Cas called Zar's agent.

"Hey, Eric. It’s me Cas. What’s up? Balthazar says you have your panties in a twist about something?"

"Cas, babe, glad you called. I absolutely NEED Zar on this tour. Fallen Angels must go on the across America tour. All the big names are headlining, The Leviathans, The Lonely Hunters, even The Phallic Hosts. So Come on. Wadda ya say? You wanna share your baby cakes with America for a few months?"

"How long is a few, Eric? And you know Zar. He is going to need all his special treats. His own bus, his specialty chocolates, that weird boyfriend pillow thing he sleeps with, which would be creepy if it wasn't also kind of sweet. "

"Yes, yes Cas. Of course. As usual your little diva can have whatever he wants. We need his voice, dammit. We’re willing to deal for it. "

"You didn't say how long."

"Four months, six tops."

"Fucking, really?" Cas paced but had to stop because he could only go a short distance with the cord attached to the telephone he was using. "Fine Eric. But I want him back in one piece. Relatively sober. And if he cheats. I'm blaming you."

"Okay, okay, don't worry. He'll be a saint. I'll make all the arrangements. You call Zar and let him know."

"Uh, no. Why don't you call him? I get shitty reception, and he has a phobia about answering calls he doesn't recognize."

"Okay, whatever you say. Thanks again Cas. You’re a dream."

Cas hung up the phone. Great. So even if he did settle this, he would be going back to an empty apartment.

* * *

Dean laid in his bed staring at the ceiling Cas was back. He didn't expect this. He didn't know what he expected when he wrote his number on that paper. Maybe he just hoped he would hear his voice, angry as it would be. But he was there. He had stood in his Deli. The Deli that should have been both of theirs. Dean knew good and well why Cas was here. The thing was, now that he had Cas, here, in this town. He definitely wasn't letting him leave that easily. What Dean needed was a plan. A good, solid plan. He shifted and rolled over on his stomach, the motion causing a chain to slip out from under his shirt revealing a gold ring dangling from it. Dean gripped the ring, running his thumb over the smooth service. Cas was back. Dean smiled evilly, as had just thought of a plan.


	3. Simple Man

Cas stepped out of Charlie's house around noon. It was a bright sunny day and it didn't match Cas' mood. He was irritated and wanted to be home. But, he came here on a mission and he'd be damned if he went home empty handed. He was tired of the games. So he turned to walk over to the deli, but something caught his attention down the street. A group of guys was playing football. So he started walking in that direction. One team of guys had red shirts on. The other team. Lord help him, was shirtless, but that wasn't what had his attention. Dean stood there shirtless, sweating, sunlight bouncing off him. And fuck if that wasn't hot enough, his hair looked as if someone had run their hands through it. Cas fought the urge to tame it himself.

 _"Get it together Novak... you're engaged remember?"_ He thought to himself. The opposing team called a time out. Cas stood there watching as Dean walked to the picnic table and grabbed a bottle of water. He unscrewed the lid, took a drink and then poured the rest of water on himself. _Son of a bitch._ Dean lifted his head and looked in Cas’ direction and winked.

 _"That rat bastard!"_   Cas thought as he turned and ran away. Okay, he didn't so much run as he walked quickly. Okay, so he ran, he was human damn it. He went to duck into the deli for a sandwich, but when he tried the door it was locked. So he jerked on the door again. Cas cursed under his breath and leans up against the door, refusing to turn around.

He heard Dean laugh from behind him, “We're closed.” The he felt Dean slap his ass.

Cas whipped around and pinned his own body against the glass, covering his backside.

“Room for one more out here,” Dean called as he jogged backward away from him.

Benny yelled from the field, "If your up for it brother."

“Yea... unless city life made you soft, Novak,” Ash said then laughed. 

“Awe, leave him, alone guys,” Garth said. “He probably forgot how.”

  
All the guys on the field laughed at that. _“Oh hell no. Time to show them just what Castiel Novak is made of,”_ Cas thought to himself. He unbuttoned his jacket and pulled his shirt off, only leaving his undershirt on. “Alright... you guys wanna play, fine.” Cas walked over and stood beside by Ash. “But I'm taking Winchester down.”

Benny chuckled, “Always did brotha.” He slapped Cas on the back. “Welcome back, feels like old times.”

Cas got in position in front of Dean. Dean leaned in and made eye contact with Cas. “Oh baby, I'm going to love having you underneath me.”

And that's how Cas' team lost the game.

***

By the time, the game was over Cas was sore. Fuck he hadn’t played football in, well, since high school. He was never on a team. No way in hell was he getting up at the ass-crack of dawn for that shit. Okay so maybe he did get up early every once in a while. But that was only so he could watch Dean practice. Cas stretched his back and felt it pop.

“Getting old are ya?” Garth asked with a huge grin on his face.

“Screw you water boy,” Cas replied smiling at the younger man.

Garth patted him on the back, “It’s good to have you back,” he commented as he walked off down the road. The other men have already left the field, leaving only Dean and himself.

“I’m heading to take a shower. Come by the deli in like twenty minutes and I’ll make you a sandwich.” Dean said as he walked toward the deli, not waiting for an answer. Cas walked back to Charlie’s and used her shower.

Finally feeling clean he pulled clean clothes on. Back outside, he walked to the deli. Dean was waiting for him.

“Lock the door behind you, will ya,” Dean asked. Cas must have paused for a beat too long because Dean lifted his eyes to him. He laughed and shook his head. “Dude, I’ll keep my hands to myself. This is the only day the deli is closed and I would rather not have someone walk in.” Cas walked over to lock the door and let out a deep breath. An uneasy silence fell over them while Dean put together their food. He handed Cas a plate and then walked off.

“Where are you going,” Cas asked curiously.

“Upstairs, I have an apartment, you’re welcome to join. Or you can eat here by yourself. Either way is fine with me.”

Cas' mouth dropped open. He doesn’t know what game Dean is up to now, but he followed him anyway. When he walked through the door he stopped short. The place was huge, not what he expected at all. The walls were painted a light yellow, there were matching pieces of furniture. It reminded him of his penthouse, except he knew none of this was bought to show off money.

There were several pictures of Dean’s family on the walls. His eyes ran over each one of them. A feeling of grief washed over him. A loss of his easy childhood that was a thing of the past now. He had no cares in the world back then. Some days he almost wished it was still that easy. On another wall were pictures of their school friends. He wondered where Dean managed to get all them.

“Beers in the fridge,” Dean said pulling Cas back to reality.

Cas just nodded, walked towards the kitchen and grabbed one. Back in the living room he sat down in one of the recliners. There was music playing in the background, he listened closely and recognized the voice.

“I didn’t peg you as a fan of Fallen Angels.”

Dean's eyes flicked up and a look of confusion crossed his face. “They’re good so why not?”

Cas shifted in his seat and took a bite of his food. Once he swallowed he finally said, “The lead singer, is my fiancé, Zar.”

“Oh. Well, I didn’t know that.” Dean dropped his head down.

Nothing else was said until after they finished their food. Dean leaned back in the couch and pulled his feet up to get comfortable. “So, you wanted to talk, let’s talk.”

Cas nodded and for a minute he remained silent. He didn't want to cause Dean any more pain.

"I know what you want from me, Cas. You want out, you want me to sign those papers and let you go." Dean fidgeted with his beer bottle peeling the label. "I guess I'm willing to do that, under one condition."

“I didn’t think this was a negation. It’s been ten years.”

"Yea, I know that. That day you told me you never would've married me on purpose is burned in my brain." Dean’s eyes met Cas. "But I have had ten years to think about this Cas. You have never given us a chance. You never came back. You never tried. So my deal is, you try. You live here with me for six months. As my husband, no sex unless you want to." Dean tried to smile. "Anyway, you live in my home, you work in this deli. Like we talked about the night we got married. That's my deal. No, negotiations."

Frustration flashed in Cas eyes, “Damn it.” He stood up and walked to the window, and looked down over the street. Sighing he asked, “What do you want from me, Dean? What do you think will come out of this after six months? That I’ll forget my life and move back here?”

Dean laughed and shook his head, “There is a list of things I want from you, but that’s not important. I don’t know what I expect to happen. I just want you to see what you gave up to follow in your dad shoes. To do what HE said. Not what YOU wanted.”

“Dean. It wasn’t that easy. You knew my father. You knew what was expected of me.”

That much was true. Everybody knew Cas’ father. You obeyed his rules or you were disowned. There were many times Cas wanted to say fuck it and leave the house. But, his younger sister, Anna, kept him there. He had always been close to her since the day she was born.

When Cas’ father found out about Vegas, he flipped his shit. Cas told his father that he planned to stay with Dean. That regardless of the circumstances, he did love him, and he wanted to be with Dean. James gave him an ultimatum, it was either his family (which he really meant Anna) or Dean. If he walked out the door, he was to never return. It broke Cas heart, but in the end he chose his family. Cas never explained it to Dean. He just left. He felt like that was the best thing to do.

Cas searched Dean’s eyes not really sure what he was looking for, “Fine, Zar leaves on tour tomorrow. I’ll call him now and let him know.”

“You’ll get a better signal on the roof.”

* * *

The stairs leading up to the roof were in Dean’s room. So Cas walked up to the roof and looked around. The roof was level so he didn’t worry about slipping. It reminded him of the rooftop gardens in the city, the area was beautiful. There were several little places with plants. A little table and a few chairs. A hammock was hanging between two poles. Cas smiled as he walked over. He lowered himself into a chair, pulled his phone out, and sure enough there were two bars. Not the best reception, but he would make it work.

“Cassie, Mon Amor,” Zar answered in a sing-song manner.

A smile crept across Cas’ face. “Hello, babe. I’ve missed your voice.” 

"Oh, darling I have too! Tell me you got the papers signed and you will be home soon.”

Cas pinched the bridge of his nose. Zar had jumped right to the point. Normally that was a trait Cas loved about him, but right now it was irritating. No time for small talk or stalling. “No, Balthy, not yet.”

“The cell reception there is shitty. I thought I heard you say not yet.”

Cas let out a deep breath and continued. “You heard me correctly. He has agreed to a divorce if- if I stay here for six months, live with him, work with him in his deli, while you are on tour.” He braced himself for the diva meltdown he knew was coming.

“You must be joking! How can he possibly ask that of you?”

“Balthy.”

“How could you even think of agreeing?”  
  
“Zar.”

“You married him on a whim it’s not like you actually loved him. Now he wants you to play Home and Gardens? No. Tell him no. I forbid it.”

“Balthazar!” Cas leaned back in the chair and squeezed his eyes shut. “I’m doing this for us.”

Zar’s voice echoed Cas’ words, “You’re doing this for us? How the hell is this for us Castiel?”

“Balthy would you just listen to me for one minute.” Cas ran a hand through his hair. “If he fights this the media will have a field day with it. We just announced our engagement. You are embarking on an across America tour. We don’t need this right now.”

Zar sighed, "I suppose that’s true. If the media find out my happy engagement is a backwoods nightmare, it would ruin us. I don’t like this Cassie."

Cas relaxed back in his chair he knew when he had won. "I know Balthy, It’s only six months and you'll be gone anyway and then this will all just be a distant nightmare."

Zar sighed again, "Okay, fine, I have to get back now, love and kisses darling."

Cas hung up the phone, hoping Zar would just think that he lost signal. He laid his head back and stared at the night sky.

***

The next morning Cas woke up to an annoying sound coming from the living room. He sat straight up, looking around the unfamiliar room. Oh, that’s right he was in Dean’s apartment, in the spare bedroom. Thankfully Dean hadn’t expected Cas to sleep in the same bed as him. He looked at the clock, groaned and got out of bed. Cas grabbed a t-shirt out of the closet, a pair of jeans and pulled them on. He didn’t bother taming his bed hair, instead he walked to the door and flung it open. Dean was at the kitchen counter drinking coffee.

Dean didn't try to contain his smile. “Morning.”

“Fuck mornings.”

“Someone’s grumpy.”

“Someone’s too perky to be up this early,” Cas shot back, walking the kitchen to pour himself a cup of coffee.

He was on his second cup when they walked down to the deli. Dean said something about Cas being on grill duty. Which was fine with him. He would be away from customers as long as he was back there. He could handle grilling. About two hours into his shift, a woman asked for coffee. Dean was helping another customer so Cas took off his apron and threw it, not realizing it hit the grill. Cas grabbed a cup and the coffee pot, poured the hot liquid in, and handed it to the woman. They made small talk for a few minutes.

“Is something burning,” Dean asked with panic in his voice.

Cas turned around and noticed the flames, he sprinted back to the kitchen and grabbed the fire extinguisher getting the small fire under control.

 _So I've already tried to burn the place down. What else could go wrong today?_  Cas thought to himself.

***

Around lunch time, Dean left Cas in front while he went to the back to get more meat and cheeses they needed. A middle-aged man came in and sat down at the counter.

“What can I get for you,” Cas asked with a smile on his face. So it was fake but, hey no one had to know.

“I would like the deluxe sandwich meal please, but could I have a salad instead of fries?”

“Sure thing.”

“No lettuce or tomato on the sandwich.”

“Ok, you got it.”  
  
“And actually, what cheeses do you have?

“We have a variety of cheeses.” Cas’ patience was wearing thin. “For that sandwich we offer Swiss, Cheddar, Mozzarella, Monterrey Jack, or Provolone.”

“Oh, I don't like any of those, no cheese either please and can I switch the ham to bologna, please?”

Cas closed his eyes and counted to ten. “... Sure...”

“Oh and no condiments.”

Cas sighs, “Why didn't you just ask for a piece of bologna on bread?” He moves around to get started on the sandwich. “That would have been easier.”

There was a little snicker behind him and Cas turned to see Dean. Cas glared at him, but there was a smile on his face.

Dean stepped in between Cas and the customer. “I’m sorry Mr. Tipton, he’s new.” Dean turned to Cas, “Why don’t you head in the back and do inventory Cas?”

Cas walked in the back and muttered to himself, “Great all I’m basically good for is inventory. I fail at 'deli guy'.”

***

Surprisingly Dean had everything well organized so Cas moved around the room with ease. He counted all the items on the shelf and wrote them down, so he could give it to Dean. Around one Dean locked the front door so they can each lunch. He walked in the back in time to see Cas reach for a big box of sugar packets. The box was unstable and fell dumping the contents all over Cas. Dean leaned against the shelf with a smile on his face, "You trying to reenact a Def Leppard song?"

Cas looked over at Dean and his eyes look defeated, "I'll clean it up, don't worry." He kneeled down and started picking up sugar packets.

“Hey. Cas, first days are always hard. Tomorrow will be better.” Dean smiled as he kneeled down to help clean up. Once they were done he said, “Let’s go each lunch.”


	4. Pour Some Sugar On Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs Mentioned in this Chapter
> 
> Walking On Sunshine - Katrina and the Waves  
> Baby got Back (big butt's song) - Sir Mixalot  
> Rehab - Amy Winehouse  
> Pour Some Sugar On Me - Def Leppard  
> He Don't Love You (Like I Love You) - Tony Orlando & Dawn  
> Simple Man - Lynard Skynard

Cas' whole body was sore. He didn't know it could hurt like that just to cook and serve food all day. Dean seemed to keep a smile on all day and never snapped at a customer. As Cas got in the shower he felt the heat of the water relaxing his sore muscles. It had felt good, though, to actually use his hands. To use his muscles. When was the last time Cas had done anything even remotely physical, besides Zar? That barely even counted since usually Zar was so high he just sort of flopped over on the pillow and patted Cas' head muttering that annoying, "Love and Kisses", before passing out. He grabbed the shampoo. He couldn't argue when Zar sang, though. Cas secretly had a weakness for a man who could sing. Cas washed the shampoo out of his hair and turned off the water. He was toweling off when there was a knock on the bathroom door.

"Hey, Cas. A bunch of us go over to Love Bites after work. You should come."

"Yea, I don't think so Dean.”

"It’s not really optional. Call it part of the Deal. Now get out of there, I need a shower and then I'll meet you downstairs in fifteen minutes."

Cas grit his teeth and opened the bathroom door. Dean smiled at him and didn't try to hide his look of appreciation at Cas only wearing a towel, "Thank God you stayed in shape."

Cas pulled the towel tighter around his waist and hurried to his room. "I didn't do it for YOU."

Dean smiled, "We'll see." He shuts the bathroom door.

Cas slammed his bedroom door and started dressing in a fit. _Dean Winchester is the most infuriating man! I don't even care that he has that stupid grin, with those stupid dimples_. He pulled on a pair of jeans _. Those stupid smattering of light freckles across his nose_. He put on a t-shirt. _That stupidly adorable eyebrow quirk_. _Nope. I don't care one bit_. He put on his socks and shoes then looked in the mirror. He took off his shirt and turned it right side out. Nope. Dean Winchester didn't get to him AT ALL.

***

Cas was waiting downstairs when Dean got there. When they arrived at the bar they met up with Garth, Ash, Charlie, and Meg. Cas saw a sign when they first walked in and heard someone crooning off in the back. The sign read:

**Karaoke Tonight: Winner gets a free pitcher of beer**

Cas looked around, "Karaoke really?"

Ash shrugged. "Yea, but I don't know why Benny bothers with the contest, everyone knows who always wins."

"Who?"

Someone elbowed Ash, but Cas missed who. Ash rubbed his gut and said, "Well… you'll have to see. Let’s find a seat."

As the night went on Cas learned that EVERYONE sang at Karaoke night. They all got a little liquid courage in them and they started pouring over the playbooks deciding what they were going to sing. Cas had to admit he was actually enjoying himself. He couldn't recall when the last time was that he just had a relaxing night out with friends, that didn't involve contacts, and fake kisses and the false dropping of the words, _"honey, baby, babe, sweetheart,"_ or any other words that should be terms of endearment. Here, he was just Cas or Novak. He liked it more than he should.

Charlie was the first up to sing. As soon as the music started she threw her hands up in the air, dancing without care or concern if anyone noticed. Cas laughed. He always loved that about Charlie. She belted out;

  ** _I'm walking on sunshine (whoa oh)_**

**_I'm walking on sunshine (whoa oh)_ **

**_I'm walking on sunshine (whoa oh)_ **

**_And don't it feel good (HEY!) Alright now_ **

**_And don't it feel good (HEY!) Alright now_ **

**_All right now yeah! (HEY!)_ **

When Charlie’s song ended everyone whooped and clapped. Even though she wasn't the best vocalist, she got points for enthusiasm.

* * *

Garth came next and when he started singing Cas spewed his beer out. He grabbed a bunch of napkins and mopped it off of Ash apologizing profusely. Ash shrugged he didn't seem to mind.

Garth turned his hat backward and grabbed the mic;

**_I like big butts and I can not lie_ **

**_You other brotha's can't deny_ **

**_That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist_ **

**_And a round thing in yo face_ **

**_You get sprung, wanna pull out yo tough_ **

**_'Cause you notice that butt was stuffed_ **

**_Deep in the jeans she's wearin'_**

**_I'm hooked and I can't stop starin'_**

**_Oh, baby, I wanna get wicha'_**

**_And take your picha'_**

**_My homeboys tried to warn me_ **

**_But that butt you got makes me me me so horny_ **

The guys all busted out into a fit of laughter when Garth was done and shouted, "Go garth! Go garth!"  Garth left the stage fist pumping like Arsenio Hall.

He sat down at the table and took a large swig of beer. "When are you gonna sing Cas?"

"Oh, I'm just watching tonight."

"You better pick something, the girls will make you sing. You watch."

Cas took a drink of his beer and hoped Garth was wrong. He could sing, but he was not getting up there and sing in front of his friends and especially in front of Dean.

* * *

Ash was up next. His number was subdued after Garth's number. It reminded Cas of nights out at the Hudson. All of them drinking a couple of beers. Dean's Impala's radio cranked up, talking about life after high school. Ash sang quietly but with conviction.

**_Mama told me when I was young_ **

**_"Come sit beside me, my only son_ **

**_And listen closely to what I say_ **

**_And if you do this it'll help you some sunny day"_ **

**_"Oh, take your time, don't live too fast_ **

**_Troubles will come and they will pass_ **

**_You'll find a woman and you'll find love_ **

**_And don't forget, son, there is someone up above"_ **

**_"And be a simple kind of man_ **

**_Oh, be something you love and understand_ **

**_Baby be a simple kind of man_ **

**_Oh, won't you do this for me, son, if you can"_ **

 

Ash nodded at the applause and took his seat. He pointed at the stage talking to Cas, "Megs up next. She's good."

* * *

Cas turned his attention back to the stage. Megs number started and it was an up-tempo number, but she sang it well. Maybe she was the one who usually won the beer every time.

**_They tried to make me go to rehab_ **

**_I said, "No, no, no"_ **

**_Yes, I been black_ **

**_But when I come back, you'll know, know, know_ **

**_I ain't got the time_ **

**_And if my daddy thinks I'm fine_ **

**_He's tried to make me go to rehab_ **

**_I won't go, go, go_ **

Meg was good. Cas clapped loudly for her as well. She bowed and then probably for dramatic effect did a shot of tequila on stage. The crowd loved it and applauded some more. Meg came down to sit. Dean smiled and looked up over his playbook. "Yea, yea. I know. I'm good, but you’re better. What you got hidden up your sleeve for us tonight, Winchester?"

Dean dropped his boots off the chair and stood up. He stretched his shoulders, linking his hands behind him. "You'll see. Nothin' much Meg. I'm sure you got this in the bag." He winked at her.

She grabbed a chip and shoved it in her mouth, "Shit."

Cas looked around the table, "What did I miss?"

Ash looked up at the stage Dean was heading to, "This is the part where Dean makes all of us look bad. But at least he shares the beer."

Cas looked back quickly at the stage. Dean can sing? The music started and Dean said into the mic, "Hey Cas, Remember this one?" He laughed.

 

**_Step inside, walk this way_ **

**_You and me babe, Hey, hey!_ **

****

Cas thought, _oh please. Please don’t be good. Please don’t be good_.

****

**_Love is like a bomb, baby, c'mon get it on_ **

**_Livin' like a lover with a radar phone_ **

**_Lookin' like a tramp, like a video vamp_ **

**_Demolition woman, can I be your man?_ **

****

_“FUCK! He's good.”_ Cas thought. Then Dean licked his lips and Cas forgot to think about anything.

****

**_Razzle 'n' a dazzle 'n' a flash a little light_ **

**_Television lover, baby, go all night_ **

**_Sometime, anytime, sugar me sweet_ **

**_Little miss ah innocent sugar me, yeah_ **

****

**_Hey!_ **

**_C'mon, take a bottle, shake it up_ **

**_Break the bubble, break it up_ **

****

**_Pour some sugar on me_ **

**_Ooh, in the name of love_ **

**_Pour some sugar on me_ **

**_C'mon, fire me up_ **

**_Pour your sugar on me_ **

**_Oh, I can't get enough_ **

****

**_I'm hot, sticky sweet_ **

**_From my head to my feet, yeah_ **

****

Dean got off the stage. Was that allowed? He strutted over to the table.

****

**_Listen! red light, yellow light, green-a-light go!_ **

**_Crazy little woman in a one man show_ **

**_Mirror queen, mannequin, rhythm of love_ **

**_Sweet dream, saccharine, loosen up_ **

****

He untucked Cas' shirt from his jeans and smirked. He turned and walked back to the stage.

****

**_You gotta squeeze a little, squeeze a little_ **

**_Tease a little more_ **

**_Easy operator come a knockin' on my door_ **

**_Sometime, anytime, sugar me sweet_ **

**_Little miss innocent sugar me, yeah, yeah_ **

**_Give a little more_ **

****

**_Take a bottle, shake it up_ **

**_Break the bubble, break it up_ **

 

He climbed back on stage.

****

**_Pour some sugar on me_ **

**_Ooh, in the name of love_ **

**_Pour some sugar on me_ **

**_C'mon fire me up_ **

**_Pour your sugar on me_ **

**_Oh, I can't get enough_ **

****

**_I'm hot, sticky sweet_ **

**_From my head to my feet yeah_ **

****

During the guitar solo, he actually did an air guitar that made everyone cheer and laugh. When he started singing again he pointed at the crowd.

****

**_You got the peaches, I got the cream_ **

**_Sweet to taste, saccharine_ **

**_'cause I'm hot, say what, sticky sweet_ **

**_From my head, my head, to my feet_ **

****

**_Do you take sugar? One lump or two?_ **

****

**_Take a bottle, shake it up_ **

**_Break the bubble, break it up_ **

He beckoned to the audience getting everyone to sing the last verse with him. Damned if Cas didn't know a crowd pleaser when he saw one. It was his job to know it. Cas knew why Dean won every week, and it wasn't just that voice. He had what they call in the biz _'presence_ '. It’s why Zar sold out at every show and why a bar full of people were screaming for Dean to pour some sugar on them.

**_Pour some sugar on me_ **

**_Ooh, in the name of love_ **

**_Pour some sugar on me_ **

**_C'mon fire me up_ **

**_Pour your sugar on me_ **

**_Oh, I can't get enough_ **

**_Pour some sugar on me_ **

**_Oh, in the name of love_ **

**_Pour some sugar on me_ **

**_Get it, come get it_ **

**_Pour your sugar on me_ **

**_Ooh_ **

**_Pour some sugar on me_ **

**_Yeah! Sugar me!_ **

The crowd went wild. Dean tossed the mic in the air caught it then set it on the stand. He jogged back to the table. He was out of breath at least Cas thought. It was good to see Dean was somewhat mortal. Cas was truly starting to have his doubts.

The girls were stood up beside Cas, twin smiles of mischief on their faces, "Your turn."

"Uh, yeah, no. I'm not singing tonight.'

Meg smiled, "We know. Ash told us."

Charlie grinned, "That’s why we picked a song for you. Don't worry we will be up there with you. We’re going to sing back up."

"What song did you pick that I need backup?"

Meg raised her eyebrows, "You'll see."

They pushed him up on stage. One of them handed him the mic the other faced him toward the prompter.

When the song title came up. Cas said, "No."

The girls spoke in unison, "Cas, come on!"

The music started, "I'm not singing this…"

The girls started to sing their backup part.

"I'm not going to do it!" … "Fuck it fine."

**_He don't love you, like I love you_ **

**_If he did, he wouldn't break your heart_ **

**_He don't love you, like I love you_ **

**_He's try-in' to tear us apart_ **

Cas whispered behind him, "I'm gonna kill you". The girls just smiled and continued dancing.

**_Fare thee well, I know you're leavin'_ **

**_(I know you're leavin')_ **

**_For the new love that you've found_ **

**_The handsome guy that you've been dating, whoa_ **

**_I got a feelin' he's gonna put you down 'cause_ **

****

**_He don't love you, like I love you_ **

**_If he did, he wouldn't break your heart_ **

**_He don't love you, like I love you_ **

**_He's try-in' to tear us apart_ **

****

**_He uses all the great quotations_ **

**_Says the things I wish I could say_ **

**_Whoa, but he's has so many rehearsals_ **

**_Yea, to him it's just another play_ **

**_but wait_ **

**_When the final act is over_ **

**_And you're left standing all alone_ **

**_When he takes his bow and makes his exit_ **

**_Boy, I'll be there to take you home_ **

Cas shrugged like he had lost the fight and laughed did a little Tony Orlando spin. The girls beamed.

**_OW!_ **

**_He don't love you (and he never will)_ **

**_Like I love you_ **

**_If he did, he wouldn't break your heart_ **

**_Oh, he don't love you, not, like I love you_ **

**_He's try-in' to tear us apart_ **

**_Whoa, he don't love you.._ **

**_and he never will..._ **

****

The crowd applauded. When Cas got back to the table Benny was carrying over two pitchers of beer. "I'd say it was a tie between the happy couple." He slapped Cas on the back, "Nice set of pipes brother. You got lucky. Last time the girls picked my song I sang the _‘Thong song.’_ " Benny shook his head and shuddered.

Dean seemed subdued.  Cas looked at him, "It wasn't my idea."

Dean poured a beer, not meeting Cas' eye, "Hey it was good. Good job. Cheers."

"Cheers."

* * *

Cas and Dean part ways with everyone at the bar.

Ash carried a very drunk Garth out to his truck still singing about liking big butts, "Yes… yes Garth, we know." He dumped him into the cab and waved.

Charlie walked with Meg draped over her arm, "Lu is going to kill you, Meg. You are wasted."

"Oh, what's he gonna do, send me to hell? He's a push-over."

Charlie stumbled but managed to half turn, "Adios Bitches. See you, two crazy kids, later."

* * *

Cas and Dean were both quiet as they walked back to the Deli. Dean unlocked the door and locked it behind them. They headed upstairs. As they got to the to doors that separate their rooms Cas stopped, "Thanks. I um, It was fun."

Dean rubbed the back of his neck, "Sure Cas. We do that every Friday so, you know if you liked it."

Cas peeled at the paint on the doorjamb, "Yea. I. I didn't know you could sing."

Dean shrugged, "Right. You’re probably used to that, though. With your... boyfriend... and all that"

"Fiancé', I guess, yeah."

"Right... yeah... ok well, goodnight, Cas."

"Night, Dean."

***

Cas stepped into his room and closed the door. He heard Dean’s room door close next door.

"And the award for the most awkward conversation goes to? Fuck. How many more days??"

Cas blew out a breath and started undressing. He climbed into bed and laid on his back and stared at the ceiling. How did he end up back here? In this town? He had to stop thinking like this or he wasn't making it a whole six months. What did he do when he was negotiating a deal? Find out what the client wanted? Well, that wasn't too hard, Dean wanted him. What did he want BESIDES that? They always made an unreasonable demand first. He wanted Cas to truly try. OKAY. The next thing Cas would do when negotiating was, if it was reasonable, give them what they wanted. So, Cas had to stop fighting and try living this life. Cas took a deep breath. A part of him said if you really love Zar, it won't matter. Six months from now, you'll go back home and nothing will have changed. The other part of his brain though is the one that worried Cas. That part was a traitorous bastard.

***

Dean walked into his room and shut the door. He heard Cas door shut with a click and, of course, the turn of the lock.

Dean mocked Cas voice "My fiancé',” Dean scowled. Cas always had to toss that out didn't he? "My Fiancé' is the lead singer of this band... didn't you know?" Dean sat on the bed and took his shoes off, "oh... let me just pop up to the roof and call my fiancé and see if your plan to be my husband is ok with him." He pulled off his jeans _. Cas' fiancé', “probably sings him a fricking lullaby while he is gently fucking him to sleep,”_ Dean thought. He pulled off his t-shirt and climbed into bed. “ _Well, listen up Cas', "fiancé'. He's my HUSBAND and I love him too.”_ Dean’s mind started thinking other not so romantic thoughts though involving his husband…

****

That traitorous part of Cas' mind came to attention and so did Cas' cock. He started to think about Dean being out on that field yesterday sweating and hot and shirtless.

***

Dean started thinking of Cas laying under him, in the grass, covered in mud... panting.

***

Cas could still hear the sound of Dean's voice as he sang about being hot and sticky and sweet. Cas' hand slowly traveled down his body, sliding off his boxers.

***

Dean could see Cas watching him sing, his tongue wetting his lips, his blue eyes beckoning him nearer. Dean wrapped his hand around his aching cock sliding his hand up it.

***

Cas began to work his cock seeing Deans green eyes, feeling him yank his shirt out of his jeans, wanting him to keep going to keep undressing him. His head tilts back, his breath coming in pants.

***

Dean strokes faster remembering a night in his Impala when he had Cas pinned to the back seat his body furiously pumping into him as Cas' nails dug into his shoulders.

***

Cas arched his hips up, he is fucking his fist recalling the dream he had that was interrupted, he is sweating and taking Dean his climax so close...

***

Dean was pumping furiously, he is so hot with a need for Cas. This was what he wanted. What he needed "Oh god Cas... fuck... yes... Cas…"

***

Cas could barely contain himself anymore. Dean was there. Under him spread out and yearning and begging to be fucked harder and faster and deeper, "fuck...Dean...Dean...fuck...”

****

Dean could hear Cas' voice in a sound bite in his mind, “ _baby, come for me.”_ His legs begin to shake.

***

Cas heard Dean in his dream state. “ _I want you Cas…”_  Cas' eyes closed tightly holding the image.

****

Dean sat up in bed one hand braced against the wall, he comes moaning out, "Cas...." spurting out hot cum in a stream against his stomach as he strokes out the rest of it.

***

Cas flailed back his hand, gripping the wall for purchase as he comes in spurts, his hand gripped his cock tightly, biting his lip and whispering, "Dean..."

***

Their hands slowly slid from the adjoining walls as they each find something to clean off with.

***

Cas faded into sleep with the image of emerald green eyes whispering, "I need you."

***

Dean waited till his heartbeat regulated, he grabbed his chain off his bed post and slipped it back over his neck clutching his hand around the ring, he lifted it to his lips. Then he rolled on his side and drifted off to sleep.


	5. Devil Or Angel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song lyrics used in this chapter  
> The Boys Are Back In Town - Thin Lizzy

Two weeks had passed since Cas’ first day at the deli. Everything seemed to be going fine. Cas had gotten the hang of every aspect of running things. Once he had learned the basic meat and cheeses. Dean showed him how to rotate out the salad bar and the extensive task of filtering the ice. He knew how to clean all the machines at night and how to put them all together in the morning and set up the first pots of caffeinated coffee, decaf coffee, iced tea and the soda bar.

Cas could clean the grills and fryers. He hadn't lit anything on fire since that first day. So he was feeling pretty happy with himself. Occasionally there were specialty orders that came in, foot-long subs, cheese platters, deviled eggs, etc. for parties or events. Dean and Garth had been working with Cas on those. There was actually a schematic for each of those in the back that you followed, so each of them came out the same each time. Cas was really getting into the swing of things. Last weekend he had gone out again with everyone to Karaoke. Dean won the contest again, but no one minded and Cas even picked his own song so it wasn't horrible.

It was Monday. His alarm woke him up and he barely glared at it at all as he got up. It seemed quieter than normal in the living room. He shrugged, got up and poured himself a cup of coffee. Dean must already be downstairs for the day. Cas showered and got dressed. As he was pouring himself another cup he noticed a note that must have slipped from the counter top.

Cas,

I have to be out of the Deli today. So looks like you’re on your on your own. Don't worry. I'm sure you've got this. Here’s a list of things we need for today before Garth gets there at 4:00

  *     Rotate ice in Salad Bar
  *     Make 2 Foot Longs (3 meat) for the Little League game pick up at 2:00
  *     Mrs. Trans bridge party 3 Meat and Cheese platters (details on receipt) pick up at 4:00
  *     Normal morning start-up (please don't forget to turn on fryer this time)



 

Cas went downstairs to the Deli. He read over the list again. Okay. Sure. He could do this. Right? Shouldn't be too hard. Since Dean had decided to up and leave him alone for the day. Cas wasn't sure why that bugged him. He should be happy. One day without Dean breathing down his neck, noticing everything he did. He went over and turned on the radio. The sound of Zar's voice filtered through with his new hit single Titanic Disaster. For some reason, Cas felt guilty. He looked around the Deli as if he were being watched and shut the radio back off.

The morning rush wasn’t too bad. It was a slowest one of the week so far. So that did a lot to boost Cas’ confidence. He had set up the fryers, turned on the grill. The drink bars and coffees were going. Everything would be fine. He figured he had time to rotate the ice in the salad bar before the lunch rush at this rate.

Cas had just finished up the last bucket of ice and was resetting the bins when he had a tap on the door. Dean always locked up between the breakfast and lunch rush to give them a chance to re-set. It’s none other the Poughkeepsie's finest. Cas ran to the door and unlocked it quickly. "Sorry about that officers come in."

Apparently there was a police function in town. Not a big deal right? WRONG!! It wasn’t only for the Poughkeepsie cops, but, surrounding areas as well. There is a line of them out the door for almost an hour straight. Several police officers crowding every table they have. By the time, he was done waiting on them he was covered in every condiment in the place.

He looked at the clock, 1:00. "Shit! The Little League Subs!" Cas ran to the front and turned the sign ‘Closed for Lunch’. He ran in the back and quickly put together the two, foot-long triple meat subs for the little league team. He had to run into the back fridge to get more meat and slipped, knocking over a jar of condiments, splattering mayo against the wall and ceiling. It looked like a bad porn and as he got up, a glob of it dropped from the ceiling and splatted back down on his head. He quickly grabbed a towel and did his best to clean when he could. He finished making the subs just in time. He heard a tapping on the Deli door and opened it with a smile. His hair is all over the place and he is sure mayo is in it. But the Team Leader seemed pleased by the subs and he sends him on his way. It's two o’clock he has a raging headache and he is in an extremely bad mood. Then the phone rang he plasters on the fakest smile in his voice.

"Winchester Deli! Oh! Mrs. Tran. Yes... of course your platters will be done by four. No... No... We didn't forget. You have a great day too." Cas hangs up the phone and proceeds to slide down behind the counter. He muttered, "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK. Fucking Dean!" He got up and went in the back to make Mrs. Trans platters.

While Cas is in the back he hears the door chime. "Hey, Cas. It’s Garth. Any idea why the door is locked and it says closed for lunch at 3:30 on a Monday?"

Cas sets the last of the trays in a pile and doesn't turn around. "Because I hate your boss and everything about him. These are for Mrs. Tran."

Cas walked past Garth and left the Deli. He was on a mission. Find Dean. Kill Dean. He is covered in all manner of god knows what and he doesn't care. “Who does Dean Winchester think he is anyway?”

He stopped short across the street from the fire station. Dean was outside washing the engine. Shirtless. _“Is it common,”_ Cas wonders, _“for that man to forever be half-naked?”_ He was wearing those Firefighter bottoms and suspenders and he is dipping a giant sponge into a bucket of suds. The Fire Engine is parked on the lawn of the station and Dean appeared to be washing it. Cas was beginning to wonder if Dean planned these moments just fuck with him. As Dean pulled the sponge out of the water, the water drips down his chest. He leaned against the side of the truck, his muscles flexing as he rotated the sponge over the trucks exterior. Cas' pupils dilated. “No... No. I’m pissed. And I intend to stay pissed. Not this time Winchester.” He steels his resolve and marched across the street.

“Dean!” Cas said with an edge in his voice when he walked up behind him.

Dean whipped his head around, and when his eyes land on Cas, he gets a shit eating grin on his face. He dropped the sponge in the bucket and it made a splash.

“Cas, you do know you’re supposed to put the mayo on sandwiches, not in your hair right?” His eyes ran down Cas and he laughed. “Actually what did you do? Roll around in all the condiments?”

Now is not the time for Dean’s mockery! “What the hell Dean? I wake up. I get a fucking note. You are nowhere to be seen. I thought part of the deal was spending my days WITH you!! It doesn’t work if you bale.” Cas yelled.

Something flashed across Dean’s face, it’s not anger, but amusement. He stepped a little closer to Cas, “So you’re saying you _want_ to spend your days with _me_?”

"Oh. You would just love that wouldn't you? You arrogant...Ug!"

When Dean started laughing more, Cas kicked at a hose attached to the wall. He had no way of knowing they had a certain amount of water stored up in them. The hose came loose. It started spurting water up in a stream. Cas' eyes went wide and he jumped back. Dean jumped forward to contain the hose and it covered him in gallons of water. Cas covered his hand over his mouth to stifle the laugh and tried to make a run for it.

"Oh no, you don't!" Dean shouted out dropping the hose. "You started this. You're about to get as wet as me."

Cas tried to kick off, but Dean grabbed him from behind. "Damn it, Dean. You’re getting me all wet," Cas said, but he began to laugh.

“I like when you’re wet,” Dean said as he drug Cas back over to the place where the hose had come undone. It was now pumping out water all over the ground, and Dean slipped. He braced his own body and brought Cas onto the ground with him. They were both slipping and sliding in the mud and water as they tired to get up. Each pulling the other down when one tried to get up and laughing hysterically. Then Lucif the Fire Chief comes out and shut off the water. His scowl showed he does not think any of this is funny. "Winchester. I would think as a volunteer Firefighter you would know better than to waste water."

Dean stood up, pulling Cas to his feet beside him. He attempted to look serious as he said, "Yes, Sir."

As soon as Lu walked back inside shaking his head. Dean and Cas both burst into laughter again.

****

A week later on Thursday Cas woke up to the smell of coffee brewing. He looked over at the clock on his bedside table. “Shit! It’s fucking NOON! Shit! I overslept.” Cas said out loud to his empty room. He jumped out of bed and ran around the room, grabbing jeans and a button down shirt. Cas didn't bother buttoning or zipping up his pants, his shirt is hanging open as he flung open the door. He is met face to face with Dean, who looked amused.

“Whoa Novak, where’s the fire,” Dean asked trying to sound serious but, failing miserably.

“What are you doing up here? Why aren’t you in the deli?”

“Um… because it’s Thursday.” Dean laughed.

Dean’s eyes ran down the entire length of Cas’ body. “I hope you weren’t planning on showing up down there half dressed. Although I must say,” Dean bit his lip and paused for effect. “I like it.”

Cas rolled his eyes and pulled his shirt closed, “Shut. Up. Dean.”

That only earned him another laugh from the other man, while Cas fidgeted with the button of his jeans. “Please tell me coffee is made?”

“Yeah, I just made a fresh pot before hearing your freak out.” Dean walked over to one of the stools by the bar and sat down. “Hey, we are going to the Hudson with the guys. A day with beer, good food, and friends. I know we both need relaxation.” Dean stood up and walked over to the door. “I have to head down to Love Bites and help Benny with inventory before we leave. Meet us down there in a couple hours.”

* * *

 

Cas walked down to _Love Bites_ two hours later. He stopped dead in his tracks. There, in the parking lot, was the Impala, Dean’s Baby. She was as beautiful as she was all those years ago. Cas tried to shake off the images coming to his mind. Cause really right NOW is not the time.

The guys, which consisted of Benny, Charlie, Ash, and Garth walked out of the bar carrying food and a cooler of what Cas can only assume was beer. Dean followed closely behind. He told them to put the stuff in the trunk, then he looked up and noticed Cas.

“You coming, man,” Dean asked.

Cas finished walking the distance. He ran his hand on the black car, “Yeah. Uh… you still have Baby?”

Dean shrugged, “I don’t get rid of things I love,” he said without thinking. When Dean realized what he said and smiled slightly. A look of ‘I’m sorry’ flashed in his eyes. Any other person would miss it, but not Cas. “Come on, let’s go have fun.”

After a mild argument, okay maybe not mild, Charlie ended up twisting both of Cas’ nipples. Which would probably be bruised tomorrow. That girl didn’t fight fair. Cas found himself riding between Dean and Charlie.  _“An hour riding by Dean shouldn’t be bad, should it? Nah, I’ve got this.”_

The other three men were in the backseat, already smacking, poking, and annoying each other.

“Don’t make me stop this car,” Dean barked, looking in the review mirror.

“The car is parked, Einstein,” Charlie replied.

“Shut it, Princess Leia.” Dean retorted.

“She’s totally hot, I do her,” Ash said.

“You’d do anyone, Ash. Now shut up so I can drive.”

Dean popped in a mix tape and pulled out onto the road. 

 

**Guess who just got back today**

**Them wild-eyed boys that had been away**

**Haven't changed that much to say**

**But man, I still think them cats are crazy**

**They were askin' if you were around**

**How you was, where you could be found**

**Told 'em you were livin' downtown**

**Drivin' all the old men crazy**

**The boys are back in town**

**(The boys are back in town)**

**The boys are back in town**

**(The boys are back in town again)**

 

By the time they pulled into a parking space, Cas was dying to get out. Dean smelled so good, his leg pressed against Cas’, his voice singing along to the music. _“Dean so close, I could have touched his leg and it would have looked innocent… NO… damn it.”_ One the way back Cas was going to force Charlie in the middle.

“You coming, Cas,” Charlie asked smiling.

 _“If I listened to Dean sing another ten minutes I would have.”_ Cas thought to himself as he got out of the car.

The whole group started walking down to the river and found a spot to put their stuff. The guys stripped down to their shorts and Charlie down to a bikini.

“Damn! Charlie when are you gonna give me a chance with you,” Ash asked with a cocky grin on his face.

“When you grow a vagina, Ash,” she replied as and playfully punched him in the arm.

Ash grabbed his crotch, “How do you know I don’t have one?”

Everyone cracked up laughing at that shaking their heads. Ash was forever pulling some shit like that. Dean passed beers around out of the cooler. Later Cas watched as Benny and Dean throw around a football. Ash chased Charlie around, splashing her when they got near the water. Charlie took Ash down with a knee to his back in retaliation. Of course, Garth sat beside him going over everything nerdy, but hey he really doesn’t mind at all.

When it was time to eat, everyone sat down, in a tight circle, making sandwiches and sharing chips.

“The crew back together like old times,” Garth commented.

“Yeah, like it should be,” Benny added and gave Cas a pat on the back.

As the day wore on into the night the guys build a fire. The conversation was light and fun. Cas couldn't help feeling warm surrounded by his friends. His REAL friends. The realization that he had been away too long hit him and a little sadness washed over him. Dean walked over to Baby opened the car door to get better sound from the radio. He flipped the tape over to side two, not really remembering what was on it, and turned it up.

As soon as the music started playing Cas was taken back in time. Memories of Cas in between Dean’s legs on the hood of the Impala drinking beer looking out over the water. That hot summer night, they drove out to the Hudson alone, two teenagers in love with the idea of being in love. They ended up in the backseat and fogging up the windows. It was Cas' first time how could he forget?

Finally, Cas shook off the memories. He looked up at Dean sitting across from him. The light from the fire danced in his green eyes… and Cas knew, he just knew, that Dean was thinking about that night too. Cas broke the stare and looked out over the rolling water.

After about an hour, they finally decided to pack everything up and head back home. Dean was the designated driver only having two beers earlier that day.

***

After parting ways with everyone, Cas went into his room. He sat on the bed for a few minutes with his head in his hands. _“Zar. I’ll call Zar and he will make me forget.”_ Cas got up, changed into sweats and his favorite henley. He walked into the living room and heard the shower going so he made his way up to the rooftop. The night air was cool against his cheeks as he sat down and pulled his legs up in the chair. He leaned back and sighed, his mind racing. So he grabbed his cell and dialed Zar’s number.

The voice comes on the phone gruff with sleep. “Hello, Darling.”

“Balthy,” Cas said just above a whisper.

“Cassie, Mon Amor do you realize it’s four am here?”

“I don’t have an idea where you are Zar… so no I didn’t realize,” 

“Well it doesn’t matter Cassie, it’s good to hear your voice.”

“Your’s too Balthy.” Cas’ words slurred slightly.

“Darling, are you drunk? Really?”

Cas completely ignored the question and steered the conversation in another direction. “How’s life on tour?”

“Oh, you know how it is darling. Endless hours, groupies trying to touch me, autographs, pictures, music. Your ears ringing… heart pounding… too many pills… too much booze. And if you’re lucky, you sleep. Which is what I WAS attempting to do before your beautiful voice interrupted.”

“I can take a hint, I’ll let you go.” Cas huffed a halfhearted laugh,

Cas hung up not bothering to say goodnight. When a hand lands on his shoulder he jumped. He looked up into Dean’s sea green eyes.

“Hey… Cas… you okay?”

 _“No. No, I’m not.”_ Cas thought as he stood up and headed for the stairs. Over his shoulder he said, “Yeah… I’m fine.”


	6. Hey Jealousy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song Dean was dancing and singing to that was not credited in the story is  
> Old Time Rock Roll - Bob Segar

 

The week was HELL. Dean had Cas and Garth running around like chickens with their heads cut off. They were making and freezing orders. Everything was in a massive crazy insane upheaval, all of it because the Fair was Saturday. Cas nearly forgot they had a county fair each year. Which makes sense considering Cas hadn't attended a county fair in eleven years. He missed the last one before he left. He couldn't stand to go and run into Dean, eat hot dogs and enter contests, and do all the things they had done together and then leave the next day. Not that Dean would have shown anyway. Rumor had it, when Dean got back from Vegas, he took his car, packed it with camping gear and hit the road. No one saw him for months. No one asked where he went. Then Cas left.

"Cas! You wanna hand Mr.Tipton that sandwich or just tease him with it?"

Cas realized he had been spacing out and holding the sandwich just a few inches out of reach from the customer. "Sorry about that. Here's your 'deluxe' sandwich just bologna and bread with salad instead of fries Mr.Tipton," He smiled, "Have a nice day."

Dean came over, "What was that about?"

"He's weird," he shrugged as he answered.

"Okay... Get back to work please, we're swamped. You're off in an hour then we can shower, eat and sleep. Good news though" Dean smiled brightly, "The fair is tomorrow! Deli's closed."

Cas put on the biggest smile he could muster, "Sounds great"

  
***

Cas had just gotten up when he heard a driving very loud beat from the living room.

***bum bum bum bum bum bum***

Dean slid in front of Cas wearing just underwear and a white button up shirt. He had on socks and sunglasses and he was singing into a hairbrush:

  
**Just take those old records off the shelf**

**I'll sit and listen to 'em by myself**

**Today's music ain't got the same soul**

**I like that old time rock 'n' roll**

  
Cas tried to yell over the music, "DEAN! WHAT THE HELL! ... HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND!

Dean yelled back, "IT'S FAIR DAY!" As he slid into the kitchen singing along to the song while getting coffee. Cas both wished he would put some clothes on and seriously enjoyed the view.

 

**In ten minutes, I'll be late for the door**

**I like that old time rock 'n' roll**

**Ooh**

  
Cas tried again, "DEAN WHAT DOES RISKY BUSINESS HAVE TO DO WITH FAIR DAY?" Dean did a little slide on the floor and landed on his knees to do an air guitar. Cas was gonna pass out. It was simultaneously the hottest damn thing to wake up to and the most annoying.

  
**Still like that old time rock 'n' roll**

**That kind of music just soothes the soul ooh**

  
"CAS... ITS AMAZING THAT'S WHAT!! COME ON DANCE!" Dean began to dance around the living room singing into his brush.

  
**Won't go to hear them play a tango**

**I'd rather hear some blues or funky old soul**

**There's only one sure way to get me to go**

**Start playing old time rock 'n' roll**

**Call me a relic, call me what you will**

**Say I'm old-fashioned, say I'm over the hill**

**Today's music ain't got the same soul**

**I like that old time rock 'n' roll**

  
Cas went over and shut off the music. Dean stopped and dropped his brush hand in a huff. "Dean. It's too early for old time or ANY time rock and roll." He turned around and sat at the counter to drink his coffee in peace. Dean came over and the brush clicked on the counter. He sat on the other stool swinging his feet dejected. Cas looked over and tried not to smile.

"You're grumpy this morning."

"Dean, I'm grumpy every morning. Are you going to put some clothes on?"

Dean looked down at his outfit and back up at Cas, "You know what, NO. I think I like this outfit. It's comfortable."

Cas laid his head on the counter for a second, "Fine. I'm going to shower" As soon as the shower started he heard the radio start back up. It was going to be a long day.

  
***

On the walk over to the fair, you could see the giant Ferris wheel erected and the tilt a wheel. Dean had a deathly fear of heights, so Cas figured they would be avoiding any rides today. Which was fine with him. As they walked Dean started opening his mouth wide into different positions. At one point, he even put his fingers in and stretched the sides. There was no human way any red-blooded, gay male would not be thinking, what Cas was thinking. Every time Dean's mouth opened wider Cas' mind imagined pushing his cock inside. Then he would quickly think about baseball and bees. He finally had to ask. He hated that his voice sounded a little breathy, "Dean. What the hell are you doing?"

Dean looked over like he was doing nothing out of the ordinary. "I'm working my mouth out for the pie eating contest."

Cas closed his eyes for a second, "Of course you are." Cas walked ahead of him so he didn't think about other, more enjoyable way to 'work out' Dean's mouth.

Once they arrived they decided to hit the soda booth first and get something to drink. When they approached the stand, a man had just lifted a cooler up and was setting it behind the booth. Dean hollered, "Oh shit. I'd know that fine ass anywhere. Cole Trenton, what brings you around these parts?"

The man stood up. He was in black military-type fatigues and a black wife beater tank top. His hair was closely cropped to his head. Cole smiled and his eyes twinkled, "Dean. I've been here now twenty minutes and you're already checking out my merchandise. Just like old times." He laughed and hugged Dean. "I'm actually here as a favor, they needed more guys for the auction. You doing it this year, fireman?"

Cas frowned. _“Who the fuck was this guy?”_ Cas didn't think his ass was all that impressive.

Dean laughed, "Yea.. they talked me into it." Dean turned to Cas, "Cole. Y' all haven't met. This is Castiel Novak... He's..."

Cas extended his hand, "His Husband." He said looking Cole in the eye. _“Why did I say that?”_

Dean laughed, "Uh.. yea. My Husband. You know. That whole thing."

Cole laughed too and winked at Cas, "Right. Husband. Okay, well I gotta get this stuff loaded up. I'll see you at that auction and don't forget you owe me a rematch in the Pie contest Dean?"

"You know it."

They walked off and Cas was irritated, but he couldn't quite figure out what bugged him about Cole. He just... didn't like him. "So. Where did you meet that guy?"

Dean smiled with all his teeth at Cas, "A gay bar. Come on let's get a hot dog," he ran off ahead.

Yea... Cas definitely didn't like him. He crossed his arms over his chest and huffed over to the hot dog stand. Dean went to get the hot dogs and Cas ran into Sam and his wife Jess. 

Sam hugged Cas, "Haven't seen you around in a while. How's city life?"

Cas shrugged, "Its has its ups and downs. How's it for you?"

The younger Winchester smiled and rubbed Jess's belly, "We love it, but were thinking of moving somewhere more rural when the baby comes."

Cas congratulated them and they went their separate ways promising to meet up before they headed back home to the city.

  
***

 The "Auction" It turns out was actually the:

**Poughkeepsie County Fair Annual Boy Toy Auction!**

Essentially each of Poughkeepsie's hottest guys volunteered to take it off for charity. All the money they earned went toward the children's ward at the hospital. And by the way the women gathered around the stage with hand full's of cash, ready to sink into the baskets placed on the front of the stage, those children would be very well taken care of. Cas really wished someone had given him a head's up about this. Maybe he would have worn baggier pants. And taken a cold shower this morning. Or just you know, stayed home. He sat in one of the chairs and hoped his face didn't completely give him away... maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

The auction was in a huge tent, so all the action was hidden away from children. The stage was set up with a black runner on it and there was a black curtain dividing "backstage" from the crowd. The first one out of the curtain was Benny. _"Oh lord, "_ thought Cas, _"I'm going to have to sit and watch all my childhood friends get down to their boxers for charity. On a 1-10 scale of awkward moments... I'd give this a decent 6."_

Benny was wearing a long john shirt, tweed slacks with suspenders and black boots unlaced. He Danced to, _Dusty Springfields - Son of a Preacher Man_. The women did not seem in the slightest bit disappointed.

There were a few others Cas didn't know, but they seemed cute. Lucif even danced in full fireman garb too, _MIMS- This Is Why I'm Hot_. He wondered if Dean would wear the same thing or not?

Cole came out and did a good number, Cas guessed. He did some pull ups and sit ups and some one arm (not so impressive) push ups. He did a sort of militant step dance number. His music was, _Yung Joc ft 3lw - Bout It._ Cas shrugged well... the kids would benefit.

Then the curtain opened and out came Sam in mechanics coveralls, that he was slowly unzipping, to the beat of _Billy Joel's- Uptown Girl._ Cas thought,  _"Okay. watching Dean's baby brother take his clothes off, in front of a heard of screaming women. Uncomfortable meter Just spiked to a good solid 8."_ Cas attempted to look at everything except the stage where little Sammy Winchester (who was fifteen in his head) was now doing a move, that could only be described as 'humping the stage' in his boxer briefs.

Cas had leaned down to get his drink so it wasn't his fault he nearly slipped off his seat and fell to the ground when he looked up to see who was dancing to _Joe Cockers - Leave your Hat On._

_"Oh, sweet baby Jesus!"_

Dean had on a black fedora. He was wearing a black pinstriped suit with a white tie. He had slowly peeled away the jacket to reveal he had on white suspenders against a black shirt. He was shifting his hips as he removed his coat. Cas' eyes were pinned to the stage. The screams coming from the women were so piercing, you could barely hear the music. Dean had a beautiful drop your jaw smirk on his face. When he leaned in at one point, a woman grabbed his tie, he fell to his knees and threaded it out of her hands. He yanked the tie off and pulled a woman in close kissing her cheek and leaving the tie around her neck. She fanned herself and dropped a $100 in the basket. He winked. Dean teased with the straps of his suspenders, running his thumbs down the inside of them till they were screaming to take it off. Then he turned around so they got a perfect shot of his ass, as he stretched his arms down taking off the suspenders. Cas was certain he must have just fallen asleep and this was some vivid, vivid fantasy. He shifted in his seat. The shirt came off next in agonizing slowness. Dean popped each button, looked up at the crowd, popped another button. He finally peeled it off to reveal all that muscle that Cas had been attempting to avoid since he showed up. He was just attempting to get comfortable in those little folding chairs and readjust his groin when Dean put his hand to his waistband and _"DEAR GOD. Those pants are tearaways!"_ Then Cas actually did fall over in his seat. Well, fall back would be a more accurate description. Luckily not a soul noticed as everyone had just watched Dean rip his pants off on stage. By the time Cas got up, Dean was poised. Just black silk boxers and a fedora tilted forward catching his breath from the dance and the women were filling up his baskets. He bowed and thanked them and kissed some hands and ran out the curtain.

Dean came out a few minutes later in jeans and a white t-shirt. A few woman cat-called he laughed "Behave, ladies. It was for charity." He walked over to Cas. "Hi there"

Cas raised his eyebrow, "Hi. Didn't think to let me know about this little auction ahead of time?"

Dean pretend to pout, "Didn't bring any singles?" Cas pushed him and he laughed. "Hey were you laying on the ground?"

Cas replied quickly, "No. why?"

Dean reached up and pulled some hay from in Cas' hair, "You have hay and straw in your hair," Cas shrugged.

Dean didn't push it. "So.. what did you think? Would you do me?" Dean's tone was playful.

Cas shrugged again and said back nonchalantly, "I already did."

Dean threw his hands up in the air and shouted, "He admits it!!!" He started laughing and said pointing to Cas, "You know what this is.. Progress."

Cas rolled his eyes and pushed him, "Come on. I want cotton candy."

Dean chuckled, "Lead the way."

***

They were having a pretty good time. Cas tried not to see it as a date. He tried not be too impressed when they played the hunting game. Dean was a crack shot and hit every bulls eye almost before it popped up. He tried not to feel silly and touched when Dean won a large stuffed guitar and handed it to him.

"There ya go. Now you can jam with me and my hair brush in the mornings".

He tried not to think about that damn boy toy auction. Cas really tried not to fade into the past, he tried not to remember, Dean pulling him behind one of those booths and pressing his body against Cas'. His tongue tasting like cotton candy. How his hands roamed up Cas' hips and under his shirt. His mouth leaving wet open mouth kisses down his neck. Whispered promises of things to come later, namely Cas and then Dean, not necessarily in that order. Cas shook himself back to the present. He REALLY had to stop thinking like that. All of the sudden he was very grateful for the giant guitar that he could place in front of his groin till his erection subsided.

***

The announcer called out that it was time for the pie eating contest and Dean's eyes lit up. In his excitement, he grabbed Cas' hand and ran over to the sign-up tent. Cas was too busy laughing at Dean's reaction to notice the physical contact. Then they ran into Cole again outside of the tent. Cas swung his guitar around, "Oh, Hi Cole."

Dean patted Cole on the back, "Cole. Wasn't sure you were gonna make it. You better be ready. I've been stretching my mouth all morning for this."

Cole just laughed and shook his head, "I'll just bet you have."

Cas bit his cheek, _"Fuck. Did they want to add any more sub-text to that conversation?"_

The pies were laid out on a picnic style table and the contestants all sat in one row. The judges seated across from them to ensure the pies were actually eaten. They were offered forks, and some used them. Dean and Cole didn't. Most of the contestants bailed out after 2 pies. But Dean continued to sink his fingers deep into the crust, pulling out the fruit sucking it from his fingers, even in a hurried frenzy he seemed to moan around each bite. He licked the pie from his lips and dug in for more. He was insatiable. He could not get enough.

Cas thought, _"I must be a special brand of kinky if I find this really sexy."_ Eventually, it came down to Just Dean versus Cole both men were eating the pie like their lives depended on it.

Finally. Cole sat back. He grabbed a napkin and wiped his hands, "Okay. You win. You're a fricken a machine, Dean."

Dean sat up with a mouth full of pie and a smile. He swallowed and said, "I love pie."

Dean won and got a blue ribbon which he proudly pinned to his chest. Cas patted him on the back, "Good job, you know, eating?"

Dean laughed, "Thanks, Cas. I knew I would win but." He looked over at Cole,"God damn that man can eat pie."

Cas muttered, "Yea.. like that's a great accomplishment"

Dean shot Cas a curious look.

***

Dean wanted to hit some of the booths and work off all the Pie he had just eaten. They worked their way down the stretch of carnival-type booths. Cas looked up at the lights strung above them crisscrossing to connect the two rows of booths. Cas played a game where you had to toss little balls into fish bowls. He won a fish and gave it to a little girl who smiled with a missing front tooth and ran off to show her mom. Dean rubbed the small of his back, "That was sweet Cas." Cas stiffened, liking the contact too much, and stepped away.

Dean dropped his hand, rubbed the back of his neck self-consciously, "Sorry. I didn't think."

Cas picked up his stuffed guitar, "No. It's fine. Come on let's go dunk, someone. I see they have opened that booth.”

Dean smiled. "Okay."

When they got to the booth Cas smiled widely. Cole was just climbing inside. He was going to enjoy this. He went up to the lady and bought three balls. He came back to stand in front of the booth.

Cole yelled from inside, "Give it your best shot city boy."

Cas grinned, "Did Dean ever tell you, we were in Little league together?” He tossed the ball in the air. Then he crouched down and wound his body tight. He winked, "I was the pitcher." Cas tossed the ball and it hit perfectly smack dab on the bulls eye. Cole sunk into the tank with a satisfying splash. The crowd around cheered.

Dean laughed and clapped Cas on the back, "Alright you showed him. Let's move on." Cole was re-positioning himself on the seat. "Although he does look pretty damn good wet."

Cas cracked his neck, a look of determination in his eye. He looked at Dean, "Glad you think so. I still have two balls left."

Dean looked at Cas like he didn't know what to think, "Cas come on. Give someone else a shot. You made your point."

Cas shook his head and looked at Cole, "No. I don't think I have." He threw the ball and Cole went under again. The crowd clapped. Someone yelled, "Man Cole. This guy's got your number!"

Dean stopped him. "Cas, give him a break. That water is probably freezing."

"Dean. The sign says if you sink him 3 times in a row you get that pink stuffed gorilla. Don't you want that fucking pink stuffed gorilla?"

Dean threw his hands up in the air, "What? Why would I want..?"

Cas threw the ball again sinking Cole. He walked over and smiled at the woman who handed him a giant pink gorilla half his size. He turned around and shoved it at Dean, "Here's your prize!" Cas stomped off. Dean followed dragging the gorilla behind him by one arm. Cas walked carrying the guitar under one arm like a football, all the way back to the Deli and upstairs.

Dean finally caught up with him. He waved his arm, waving the gorilla in the process. "You wanna tell me what's wrong with you?"

Cas folded his arms around the guitar like a pillow to his chest, "Nothing. Why would anything be wrong."

"So you just enjoy ruining my night? Or maybe is it the fact that you were jealous?"

"Sorry, didn't mean to ruin your night, and I'm not jealous. You can do whatever you want. In fact, why don't you go back to the fair right now and fuck Cole? End your night with a bang!

Dean raised his eyebrows, "You know. I might. Except... there is just a couple problems with that."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yea! For starters. Cole is straight, not that you bothered to ask. Secondly, I'm married!" He opened up his door dragged the gorilla behind him and slammed his door.

Cas was left standing in the hallway blinking like an idiot. He felt his phone buzz signaling his alarm going off. He pulled it out and looked at it. _"Officially been here one month... HUH.... Now I just have to make it FIVE more"_ He wrapped his arms around the guitar and dropped his head back against the wall in the hallway.

***

Dean paced his room pink gorilla still in hand. He thought to himself, _"I should be pissed. I really should. I have every reason in the world to be pissed at Cas right now. He flaunts his fucking fiance' in my face all the time. Do I freak out? No? Do I dunk him in water and throw stuffed pink animals at him? No. He flinches away from me every time I so much as accidentally touch him. But..."_ He stopped pacing and sat on the bed. He propped the goofy pink gorilla up and looked at him. Dean smiled. He thought, _"but Cas_ _was jealous. That's gotta mean something right? And sometimes, I notice him, noticing me. Just a look, here or there ..but..Maybe? No. Stop that. This is what you did last time Winchester. Don't break your own heart again."_

He got up and went to pour himself a drink then he looked over at the phone. He picked up the phone and dialed "Hey Cole. This is Dean. I'm sure you'll get this when you get home. It turn's out I can use an extra set of hands at the Deli. Why don't you come in on Monday? See ya then." He hung up and got undressed. As he climbed into bed he pulled the gorilla onto his chest and looked at it then snuggled up to it and smiled. _"Cas was jealous."_


	7. I Won't Send Roses

Monday morning was the same as any other Monday. Or at least that is the way it began. Dean and Cas woke up, have their morning coffee, Dean said Cas was grumpy, you know the usual. They were finishing up with breakfast shift. Cas was in the middle filling up a cup of Iced Tea for Mrs. Baker, his finger still on the dispenser button, when Cole walked through the door. Cas' eyes went wide and didn't notice the tea spilling everywhere.

“Cas!” Dean yelled.

Cas finally snapped out of it, “Oh shit!” He grabbed a towel and started cleaning it up.

Dean shook his head and handed Cole and apron, “I guess you can start by mopping the floor now that it's all sticky.”

Cas stood up and a murderous look flashed in his eyes. He tried to remain calm as he said, “Dean, can I talk to you for a minute, in the back, ALONE.”

Dean walked in the back and turned around. “What is it Cas?”

Cas looked around and made sure they are out of earshot of the customers and Cole. “Dean,” he pinches the bridge of his nose. “Did you hire him?”

Dean crossed his arms over his chest, “Yeah we needed the extra hands around here.” Then a slight smirk crossed his face. “Plus the extra eye candy is a bonus.”

Cas groaned and grabbed Dean's arm and drug him farther back by the freezers. “You hired him because you knew it would make me jealous!” 

“So you admit you are jealous,” Dean asked.

Cas ran a hand through his hair and walked closer, “Of course I'm jealous!”

"You know what.. that's it." Dean grabbed Cas by the head slammed his back into the large walk in freezer in the process. His mouth came down hard on Cas' kissing him. His tongue forced open Cas' mouth. Cas' hands came up raking through Deans's hair, his pulse was pounding. Cas pulled Dean up against his chest and flipped him so Dean's body was against the freezer. Dean gasped, his tongue slid inside Cas' mouth, searching, massaging, devouring. Dean's hands slid up into Cas' hair pulling him in still further. Their lips were bruised by the assault. Ten years of pent up energy  poured out into that kiss.

The door chimed up front breaking the moment. Cas pulled back startled. He laid his head against Deans's forehead for a second and whispered, "Fuck." He backed away leaving his hand on Dean's chest.

Dean looked shaken as he stood there and looked Cas in the eyes. Cas couldn't look into Dean's eyes. It's was all too real, too raw. He closed his eyes tried to regulate his breathing. He opened his eyes again and there was pain evident in them. Breathless he said, “We can't... Dean... this can't happen again...Zar... I can't do this...” His hand slowly slid from Deans's chest. He backed up and then turned around and he hurried off upstairs.

Dean didn't know what to think or feel. There was no thinking when he kissed Cas he just reacted. Now his heart, well at least it's still beating. In frustration, he turned around and punched the freezer. He saw Cole standing just in the doorway.

“Hey... man you good,” Cole asked.

When Dean finally made eye contact with him, he could tell Cole saw the kiss.

"Yea.. just.. you know. Making stupid choices again."

Cole shook his head and placed a hand on Dean's shoulder, “I'm going to find Cas and have a little chat with him.”

Dean just nodded and walked to the front of the Deli.

* * *

The rooftop was apparently becoming Cas', _'I've got shit on my mind, I need to think place.'_ Basically a safe haven for him. He was sitting in a chair with his head leaned back on it, his eyes shut. The kiss playing in his mind on repeat. As much as he enjoyed it, he wasn't the type of guy to forget about the fact he has a guy waiting back home. He felt like an asshole. He didn't want to hurt Dean. Hell, he didn't want to hurt anyone. Reaching up he touched his lips and sighs. When Dean's lips met his it was like the world stood still. It was only him and Dean and the room faded away. Then reality bit him in the ass. Shit. What was he going to tell Zar? He readjusted himself without opening his eyes and grabbed his phone out of his pocket. He needed to call Zar. But, to say what?”

“Cas.”

Cas opened one eye to see Cole standing in front of him. “It's Castiel. Cole, really now isn't the time.”

He heard Cole laugh so he sat upright in the chair and stared at him.

"I don't really care if it's a good time for you," crouching in front of Cas, he grabbed the phone out of Cas' hand and set it to the side. "I think it's the perfect time. Look... I don't have any designs on Dean. I'm straight as an arrow. Got it?”

Cas rolled his eyes, laughs and said, “You couldn't have fooled me.”

“Man... Dean and I are friends. I saw him at a low point in his life. So yeah, we tease. But, I mean no harm in it.” Cole clapped his hands together and looked off to his right, smiled and looked back. “I don't know you, man. But, I do know this much though. You need to get your priorities straight. I get it. Maybe you're only here because he wants you to be.”

Cas sat forward, rested his hands arms on his legs, his hand tucked under his chin. “You don't know a fucking thing about Dean and I.”

Another laugh came from Cole, “Maybe I don't, But... I know you don't have to fuck with him. You don't have to give him longing looks. You don't have to introduce yourself as his fucking husband. You don't have to throw jealous fits.” Cole stood up and walked over to the ledge of the roof and sat down. “Everyone in this town talks about how you eyeball him when he is remotely undressed. Then you run up here to call this fiance of yours when shit gets hard. Now he's gone and kissed you. Well, do you blame him?”

Cas felt his, _'You're pissing me off and I'm about to punch your dumb ass o-meter'_ rise in the red. “Cole, for your health... I would suggest you holding your fucking tongue.”

Cole shook his head and continued, “Let me break it down for you like this. You've been throwing up enough signals to bring down a fucking 747. So either man up and leave your rock star or stop fucking with Dean. Cause I for one, I'm fucking sick and tired of watching you break his heart and taking no blame for it.” Cole walked toward the stairs, then turned back around. “And when you're done feeling sorry for yourself, there's an order that needs to go out.”

Back down in the Deli, Dean was wiping the counters down furiously.

“You've cleaned that spot for the last five minutes.” Cole walked over and took the rag out of Dean's hand. “Go take a breather man.”

Dean's brow furrowed, “Yeah, okay.” Then he turned and walked up the stairs. He headed straight for the liquor cabinet. He grabbed a bottle of Jameson's and a shot glass, then headed into his room. He poured a shot and tossed it back. “Damn it.” He poured another and let it slide down, the burn like fire.

* * *

10 Years Ago

Dean having just arrived back home from Vegas packed a few bags in his Baby. His mind was racing and he wanted to get as far away from Poughkeepsie as possible. He knew just the place. His grandparents had left his family a cabin in Wilmington, New York after they passed away. It was a four hour trip to Whiteface Mountain.

He slid in the front of Baby as Sam walked up.

“Dean... do you really have to leave,” He asked shoulders with his hunched.

His brother and father knew what happened in Vegas. His dad was pissed and spouted all kinds of obscenities. John yelled something about no son of his was going to be gay. There were fist fights and yelling from both sides. John even threw a whiskey bottle just barely missing Dean's head.

Dean tried to smile but, it faltered. “Yeah, Sammy I do. Hey... I'll be back soon. Be good for dad buddy.”

“I'm fifteen now, Dean. I can take care of myself.” Sam said rolling his eyes.

“You'll always be five to me, Sammy.” Dean retorted as he starts the engine.

“Dean, I... well... I...” Sam started, looking down kicking at an imaginary rock.

“I know... me too,” the emotion in Dean's voice made it hitch. He reaches up and ruffles his brother's hair. “See you soon.”

Sam nodded and stepped back to watch Dean pull away.

* * *

His first stop was the cemetery his mother, Mary, was laid to rest in years ago. He walked the rows until he got to her plot. He closed his eyes and lifted his head to the sky. The tears he had been holding back rolled slowly down. He wiped his face and sat down in front of her stone.

“Hey... mama... I want to tell you... I got married.” He reached out and ran his hand over the cold granite. “You would love him, mom.... I know you would. His eyes... he has gorgeous blue eyes. I remember that was your favorite color... And Cas... that's his name mama, Castiel... but I call him Cas.” Dean smiled just slightly but, the pain wouldn't let a full one appear. “He has this smile... it's so bright... I forget to breathe sometimes when I see it...” Dean shut his eyes again. “His laugh... is like... I can't describe it... it chases all the bad away.”

More tears fell, Dean laid down on the grass, curled up, and clutched the grass. “I wish you were here mama... I really need you... he said he didn't...he said.. well... he didn't marry me on purpose... like I was a mistake.” Dean's body shook from the tears. “Mom, I don't know what to do. I love him so much.” His voice trembled. “Before I fell asleep last night... I thought I felt you wrap your arms around me. Was that you mom? It was so warm.” Dean cried so hard he could barely talk. “I have to go now, mom. I'm going to the cabin for a little while. So I won't be able to visit.” Dean struggled to get to his feet. “Please watch over me mom. I love you.”

Dean willed himself forward and slid in the seat. After the crying subsided he headed out. Two hundred and twenty-four miles to get the hell away from here. Every station seemed to play songs that threaten to rip his heart out and devour his soul.

 

**Love hurts,**

**Love scars,**

**Love wounds and marks**

**Any heart not tough or strong enough**

**To take a lot of pain, take a lot of pain**

**Love is like a cloud, it holds a lot of rain**

 

**Love hurts,**

**Ooo-oo love hurts**

 

**I'm young,**

**I know,**

**But even so**

**I know a thing or two, I learned from you**

**I really learned a lot, really learned a lot**

**Love is like a flame It burns you when it's hot**

**Love hurts,**

**Ooo-oo love hurts**

 

**Some fools think**

**Of happiness, blissfulness, togetherness**

**Some fools fool themselves, I guess**

**They're not foolin' me**

**I know it isn't true I know it isn't true**

**Love is just a lie made to make you blue**

**Love hurts,**

**Ooo-oo love hurts**

 

**I know it isn't true**

**I know it isn't true**

**Love is just a lie made to make you blue**

**Love hurts,**

**Ooo-oo love hurts**

**Ooo-oo, love hurts, Ooo-oo**

* * *

 It was dark when he made it to the cabin. He was sore and his heart ached. Dean didn't bother unloading his stuff. Inside he poured a glass of whiskey and swirled the amber liquid around. It reminded him of how his life seems to be spinning out of control. He threw it back and felt the burn down his throat, spread through his chest.

 _ **“Screw my parents, I don't want to be away from you.”**_ Cas' words haunted him. _**“I don't want to go to the city to become a producer. I don't want to be anything like James.”**_

_"We can open our own deli. You've said you want to be a cook Cas. Work with your hands and all that.”_

_**“Dean you're the best thing in my life.”** _

Dean poured another drink, grabbed the bottle, and slid down the wall.

**_“Let's get married they won't keep us apart then.”_ **

 He threw the glass and watched it shatter against the wall. He took a huge swig from the bottle itself and squeezed his eyes shut.

_**"Dean... we can't be married...”** _

_**"Dean... This was a mistake... There's no way I married you on purpose..."** _

 “Cas... fucking... Screw you.... why didn't you love me back...” He said out loud then finished off the bottle and tossed it.

That night he drank himself to sleep, leaning against that same wall. Every night after that, he would drink himself stupid. Dean would pass out where ever he was at the time he began drinking. Every morning he would wake up sweating, heart racing, screaming out Cas' name, reaching for him. His face is unshaven, he wouldn't shower and he barely ate.

* * *

After a couple months, he finally drug himself out of the cabin. He made his way to the only gay bar within a decent distance. _“Screw it... I'll just take home some random guy... and fuck him till I forget.”_

The bar was smoke filled and the music was bumping making the walls reverberate the sound. Dean's head was throbbing but, he didn't care. Men crowded the floor dancing, some eyeing him as he walked by. Red, blue, and green lights flash across the floor. Black lights hang over the bar area. Four shelves of assorted liquors lined the wall behind it. Dean makes his way up to get a drink. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed this extremely gorgeous, obviously straight man sitting at the bar getting hit on. The guy hitting on him wasn't getting the hint. So Dean walked up, snaked an arm around the guy's waist getting hit on, placed his left hand on the bar, “Sorry, I'm late baby, I couldn't decide on a thing to wear.” Dean looked up and made eye contact with the other guy who lifted his hands in surrender and backed away. Once the guy was gone Dean pulled his arm back.

“Thanks for that. Cole Trenton.” The guy said reaching his hand out.

“Dean Winchester.” Dean took Cole's hand and gave it a firm shake. Cole bought Dean a drink and they started talking. He asked about the ring on Dean's finger and after a few shots, Dean opened up and told him all about Cas. Cole tells Dean about losing his wife to cancer.

“Life is short man, I'm sure you know that. If you have a snowballs chance in hell to do something, you take it.” Cole said as they walked out of the bar. He gave Dean his number and told him to call anytime.

The next day Dean decided Cole was right. He packed up the Impala and headed home. He pulled money out of his college fund, bought a building and started preparations to open up his deli. Their Deli. And wait for Cas.

* * *

10 years ago - On a plane bound for Harvard

Cas waited with shaking hands until the seat belt light came on. The stewardess' voice came over the intercom informing them they were now free to move around the cabin. He unbuckled his seat belt and made his way to the bathroom. He stepped inside and locked the door. He leaned his back against the door. Reaching inside the pocket of his slacks he pulled out a simple gold band. He clutched it in his palm and slid down the door to sit on the floor. His hands were the first to shake. Both fists were clenched and pressed to the sides of his temples. He began to rock and the tears came, in hot pouring streams down his face. Cas didn't try to wipe them away. He rocked and wept, no noise except the small sounds of his uneven breathing in the confined space.

 _"What I have done? I can't go back now. I can't fix this."_ At that moment, he hated his father. Hated him more than almost anyone else in the world.  _"I can't hate anyone more than I hate myself. Oh. Dean. I'm so sorry."_

*knock .. knock.. knock* "Is everything alright in there?"

Cas cleared his throat, "Uh.. yea. Just finishing up. Sorry."

"No problem sir."

Cas got up, dumped the little soaps out of a purple velvet bag on the counter and put the ring in it. He slipped it in his pocket then wiped his face and looked in the mirror. He heard his father's voice. "You get on that plane and you forget Dean Winchester ever existed!"

Cas nodded and said to the mirror, "Yes, Sir."

* * *

 

Cas left the roof after his little chat with Cole and went to take a piss. He heard Dean's door close. He walked over to it and knocked. _What the hell do you say to someone you just kissed the hell out of then pushed away?_ "Hey.. Dean. Are.. are you okay?"

From the other side of the door, Dean said, "Yea Cas. I'm fine. It's okay.. I'm good."

Cas nodded then started to walk away. He turned around and walked back to the door "Uhm.. are we.. are we.. 'good' ?" He laid his hand on Dean's door.

* * *

Dean sat with his back to his bedroom door knees up. He had a bottle of whiskey, half gone dangling from his hands set between his knees.

Cas asked through the door, "Are we... good?"

Dean's lip quivered. He wiped a couple tears that fell against his will. He took a swig from the bottle and laid his head back against the door. He tried to regulate his voice, "Yea... yea, Cas. Were Good."

He heard a shuffling of feet and Cas said, "Okay. I need to take off. I have that thing with Charlie today remember?"

Dean cleared his throat "yea no.. it's fine. Cole's working today. Go on and go Cas."

"Okay... bye... I'll see you later?'

"Yep."

Dean wiped more tears away and took another drink. It was going to be a long day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the angst. It will get better for our boys. Hang in there.
> 
> Song Used  
> Love Hurts - Nazareth


	8. Swing From The Chandelier

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs used:  
> Elvis Presley - Devil In Disguise  
> BBMAK - Ghost Of You And Me  
> Cher - Still In Love With You

[Song That Inspired Chapter Title: Sia - Chandelier](https://youtu.be/oapEOaiZA0c)

 

Cas was sitting in Charlie's office, well the room she converted into an office, going through his business email. He knew that his partners were capable of running things, but still had a responsibility to the record label. Cas had met Michael Edlund, and Gabriel Carver, at Harvard. After graduating and working under his father for a few years, Cas broke free and started Archangel Records. The name was a stab at their parents for naming them after angels.

From: MEdlund@ArchangelRecords.com

To: CJNovak@ArchagelRecords.com

August 15, 2008

Subject: Contracts

Castiel,

A couple of our clients are wanting to renegotiate their contracts. We need you to look over the details and give the green light. However, we are in need a new lawyer. Zachariah was not working out so we let him go on Monday. Do you know a lawyer who is actually capable of doing their job and doesn't want to bleed us dry in the process? Is there a fax number so I can send these over?

Michael

 

From: GCarver@ArchangelRecords.com

To: CJNovak@ArchagelRecords.com

August 15, 2008

Subject: Zachariah

Cas,

How's it going in PO-dunk-ville? I bet you are bored to tears. What is there to do in a backwater town? Oh, Zachariah is an asshat and we fired him. Seriously we need someone who can pull their heads out of their greedy ass for five fucking minutes and do their job. Maybe you can break away for a few days and we can hit up a local strip club. A new one has just opened. It's called Cotton Candy Dreams. By the way, Candy is hot. Anyway get back to me.

G

**

Cas shook his head and quickly replied to Michael's email. Those two never ceased to amaze him. Both men were total opposites of each other. Michael was more refine and followed everything to the letter. Gabriel was quirky, laid back, had no filter, and loved women. Cas closed out the email. Walking back into the kitchen, he grabbed his bottle of whiskey he brought with him, a glass out of the cabinet and poured the liquid inside. He picked up the phone and started dialing his office.

“Archangel Records, Hannah speaking.”

“Hannah, I need to speak with Gabriel,” Cas said and then takes a drink. Hannah was Gabriel's secretary.

“Sure thing Mr. Novak.”

“Hannah, I've told you a thousand times to call me Cas.” 

“Right. I'll see if I can get Mr. Carver on the phone.”

There was a beep followed by hold music.

“Cas! Babe! Glad you called. Before you speak let me conference you in with Mikey.”

There was a brief pause and Cas takes a large drink and sits down in a nearby chair. After a minute, the link clicked and Michael's more distinguished voice comes on the line.

“Castiel, are you still with us?”

“Yep. Still here, Michael. So what's on the books, guys? I know I've been stuck here in fuck-my-life-ville. Of course MY star is on his third, that's right a THIRD fucking tour. So I'm not exactly draggin' us down, but I like to keep abreast with things, so what's new guys?”

“Humble as always Castiel,” Michael said his tone sarcastic. “Yes, we are aware your ever famous, and might I add always troublesome diva boyfriend is on another tour making us very rich men.”

“Yea, Cas. Zar's a dream. If you don't count the fact that he's a friggin nightmare to work with,” Gabriel chimed in laughing. “But, it's okay... I'm sure he's a rock star in bed too, am I right? I am... no need to kiss and tell... okay... kiss and tell.”

“Okay, you two have made your point, so what now? And before you even say it, no Gabe we ARE NOT hiring the salsa dancer you met in New Jersey.” Cas rubbed his forehead, “She was awful.”

Michael chuckled, “He is correct Gabriel. She was just plain bad. However, that does bring us to the topic we wanted to discuss with you, though, Castiel. We were thinking we need an edge. Not quite as edgy as Gabriel's Latin lover, but a female.”

“Yea, baby cakes. Someone with a great set of... pipes. Who can sing and has presence. A chick the fans can really dig, ya know?”

Cas sat back and thought for a minute. “And you want me to find her? Here? In Oh-my-god-what-did-I-do-to-deserve-this town?”

“What better place, Castiel? Everyone knows all the greats just wanted to get the hell out of a small town.” Michael retorted.

“Look Cas. We're not asking for promises. Just put your fish hooks out. If something bites, reel it in. Do what you do best. Catch us a big one baby.”

Cas finished his drink, “Well, it can't hurt to look. They do have a karaoke night on Fridays. I'll keep my ears open.”

“Oh, Castiel. You poor thing.”

“Cas... hey it will be okay. I promise. When you get out of lock up I'll take you someplace real nice. I promise, like a strip club.” Gabriel laughed.

“Yeah, yeah, yuck it up, fellas. I'm hanging up on you dicks now. Bye.”

Cas groaned, _“Where the hell am I going to find a good female vocalist... in Poughkeepsie?”_

Cas looked up to see Charlie leaning against the kitchen door frame. “How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough to know you bring your bottle every time. You sit it down, look at the phone, you sigh, you dial, and out comes the liquor god.” She walked over and sat down in the chair next to Cas. “You must really LOVE your job. Which brings me to my next question. Why do you make your calls here? Not that I mind... but, why?”

Cas ran a hand through his hair and looked away. When he met her eyes again he said, “Because I'd rather him not see me like this.”

“You mean when you're in mega dickhead mode?”

“Yeah, when I'm in dickhead mode,” Cas said laughing.

Charlie grinned, “Actually I said, mega dickhead. Okay, change of subject I'm dying to know. How are things with you and Dean?”

Cas pinched the bridge of his nose, “I don't want to talk about it,” he looks down, grabs one hand with the other, and starts messing with his nails.

“Why not? Did something happen?”

"I really don't wanna talk about."

"Ohmigod... Something DID happen! What? Cas, tell me right now.”

"Charlie I'm not talking about it.”

"What? Did you kiss him?"

"No! He kissed me... Then... I kissed him back... A lot... Damn it how do you do that?"

“It's a gift. Or a curse. Either way you want to look at it.”

Cas sighed, “I told him it couldn't happen again.”

“Oh Castiel, what are you doing? Boy, you need to make up your mind. Or everyone is going to get really hurt, you included. I love you honey bear, but you need to start thinking with the upstairs head.”

* * *

After talking with Charlie, Cas went back to the deli. Cas walked in the door and noticed Dean cooking. He immediately went to take a shower. Once he was out he dressed and brushed his teeth. Dinner was ready by the time he walked out of the bathroom. He sat down at the table.

Dean slid him a plate, scrunched up his nose and asked, “Did you brush your teeth?”

Cas shook his head, “No,” and started eating.

“Oh, I thought I smelled mint,” Dean replied before digging in.

* * *

Cas had to finish up inventory so he sent Dean over early to _Love Bites_. Things had been tense for the last couple weeks with them anyway. Dean had said they were good after the kiss, but Cas knew better. He could see Dean was just putting on a good front. There was distance there where there hadn't been before. What did Cas expect, though? Dean kissed him, sure, But Cole was right. Cas didn't just kiss Dean back, he kissed the hell out of him. So if he had to deal with the cold shoulder from Dean now, then he kind of deserved it. Dean just needed some space and Cas was sure he would be fine. Dean was tough.

Cas finished up the inventory then grabbed a small notepad and pen and slipped it in his pocket. He had to look for talent tonight to tell his associates. He locked up the Deli and headed over to the Bar. As he walked in he saw that Meg was at a different table than everyone else because she was there with her husband. But things didn't seem to be going well.

"Your such a bastard Lucif. I totally saw you check out that waitress," Meg said. She seemed to be already pretty tipsy.

"Babe. I only have eyes for you. Come on. Sit down you're making a scene." Lu said calmly with a slight smile on his face.

Cas rolled his eyes he never liked that guy. He walked up to the Bar. Benny shook his head looking at Meg. "Must be a full moon. Everyone is on one tonight."

"What do you mean? I'll have the usual by the way."

"Yea, I'm thinking you might want something stronger. Dean's drinkin' tonight." Benny said shaking his head.

Cas shrugged, "Okay. Dean usually does when we go out. Beer's fine Benny, thanks, though."

Benny gestured with his head, "Nah brotha. Dean ain't drinkin' beer tonight. It's whiskey, straight up."

Meg got up and strutted to the stage, Benny sighed, "Oh.. here we go. It's gonna be something angry and sexy.. you watch. Always is when Lu pisses her off."

She started singing and it was an Elvis song, but she sounded more like Billy Holiday.. and Cas thought _"well shit... that's our girl."_

 

_**You look like an angel** _

_**Walk like an angel** _

_**Talk like an angel** _

_**But I got wise** _

_**You're the devil in disguise** _

_**Oh yes you are** _

_**The devil in disguise** _

 

Cas pulled out his notepad and wrote: Bluesy .. but good showmanship.

 

_**You fooled me with your kisses** _

_**You cheated and you schemed** _

_**Heaven knows how you lied to me** _

_**You're not the way you seemed** _

 

Meg did a shot. Cas wrote: possible problem with alcohol, need a good agent for damage control.

 

_**You look like an angel** _

_**Walk like an angel** _

_**Talk like an angel** _

_**But I got wise** _

 

_**You're the devil in disguise** _

_**Oh yes you are** _

_**The devil in disguise** _

_**You look like an angel** _

_**Walk like an angel** _

_**Talk like an angel** _

 

_**But I got wise** _

_**You're the devil in disguise** _

_**Oh yes you are** _

_**The devil in disguise** _

Meg finished singing got off the stage walked over, threw a drink in Lucif's face then pulled back to slap him. He caught her wrist and kissed her. She straddled him and wrapped her legs around him. He picked her up while she was kissing his neck.

"Hey, Benny. I think we're heading out. I'll come in tomorrow for the tab." He pointed at Meg.

Benny nodded, "No problem Lu."

Cas wrote: Okay.. need a GREAT agent. He thought to himself, _"Fuck, I hate that guy, though.. but he's the best, fine."_ He wrote: Call Crowley.

After they walked out Benny set the beer on the bar and a double shot of Patron with a lime. Cas looked at it, "You trying to get me drunk Ben?"

"Nope. Just not sober and you said no to the whiskey so, I figured I'd try tequila.”

Cas tilted his head at Benny, "Something I don't know?"

Benny sighed and leaned on the bar, "You ain't been around so you don't know the signs like we do. I want you to look at that table, see how everyone's trying a little too hard to appear to be happy and having a good time?"

Cas looked, it did look overly tense, "Yeah."

Benny nodded, "Only one reason Dean switches up to whiskey. It's been less frequent over the years, but it happens. It's when _you_  weigh too heavy on his mind."

Cas ran his hand across his mouth and took the shot, "I think I'm probably gonna need a couple more of these Benny, and I'll take the beer, don't wanna raise suspicion."

Benny didn't say anything he just poured. Cas downed them flipped the glasses one by one. He headed over to the table and sat down. Dean got up and went to the stage. Charlie took a quick inhale and held Cas' hand.

Cas looked down at her hand and back up at her eyes she said, "I'm sorry. Dean only sings one kind of song when he's like this."

The music started. Dean ran his hand across his forehead and he looked... broken.

 

_**What am I supposed to do** _

_**With all these blues** _

_**Haunting me, everywhere, no matter what I do** _

_**Watching the candle flicker out in the evening glow** _

_**I can't let go** _

_**When will that night be over** _

 

_**I didn't mean to fall in love with you** _

_**And baby there's a name for what you put me through** _

_**It isn't love, it's robbery** _

_**I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me** _

 

_**Seen a lot of broken hearts go sailing by** _

_**Phantom ships, lost at sea** _

_**And one of them is mine** _

_**Raising my glass, I sing a toast to the midnight sky** _

_**I wonder why** _

_**The stars don't seem to guide me** _

 

Dean stumbled and had to sit on the edge of the stage.

Cas looked around at his friends. "Are you kidding me? He always does this? And none of you think to stop him? How often?"

No one would look at him, "I'm serious. Over the last decade, how many times has he done this? He's going to drink himself to death and you just watch and let him? And you call me the bad guy?"

Cas got up. Charlie tried to grab his hand, "Cas, wait.”

"No, Charlie, I don't wanna talk to any of you right now."

 

_**Watching the candle flicker out in the evening glow** _

_**I can't let go** _

_**When will that night be over** _

 

_**I didn't mean to fall in love with you** _

_**And baby there's a name for what you put me through** _

_**It isn't love, it's robbery** _

_**I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me** _

 

Cas stood by the table. He couldn't leave, he couldn't sit with his friends. Dean looked up and his green eyes pierced Cas' blue ones.

 

_**I didn't mean to fall in love with you** _

_**And baby there's a name for what you put me through** _

_**It isn't love, it's robbery** _

_**I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me** _

 

His hand fumbled with the stand he finally just shut off the mic and set it on the stage. He stumbled off and tried to leave.

Cas stepped in front of him, "Dean. You have to stop this. You can't do this anymore."

Dean tilted his head back and half laughed, "I'm sorry my loving you is inconvenient, Cas."

Cas grabbed Dean's arm, "Damn it, Dean. Let it Go!"

Dean shook his head sadly and pulled out of Cas grasp, "Screw you Cas."

He stumbled out of the bar. He pretty much could have said anything else and Cas might have been okay, but he didn't, _"Screw you Cas_." Cas was transported back to a hotel room in Vegas standing alone hearing that damn whoosh and click of the door.

He turned to Benny, "I'm gonna need about six more shots of Patron Ben."

Benny raised his eyebrow, "So that's your answer? Dean gets wasted, you get pissed. So you get wasted?"

Cas sat down slowly on the bar stool, his hand over his mouth. He closed his eyes. He slowly dropped his hand leaving his eyes closed.

"I don't need a shrink, Benny. I need about six more shots of Patron, to start with. Can you do that for me?" He opened his eyes and looked at Benny. Benny nodded and poured out the shots in a line on the counter.

* * *

Cas lost count after those six, at some point he decided he wanted to sing. He stumbled to the front and told the KJ what to put on. Like Dean had done earlier he sat on the front of the stage too drunk to actually stand anymore. Which was fine, he knew the song. To say that his friends were shocked is an understatement. They were damn near blown off their chairs. There was no way Cas was going to recall this in the morning and Dean wasn't here to hear it. So it was made bittersweet by the almost-ness of it all.

Cas sang;

 

_**Visions haunt my memory** _

_**They hold on, hold on desperately** _

 

_**You and I were over long ago** _

_**Don't know why my heart's the last to know** _

_**Each time I find somebody new** _

 

_**Still in love with you** _

_**I know I've been lying to myself** _

_**Baby, it's you** _

_**And you know I'll deny it** _

_**The more that it's true** _

_**Still in love with you** _

 

_**Wake up, crying in the night** _

_**These feelings I'm feeling prove you right** _

 

_**You told me no one else could take your place** _

_**No matter how I try, I can't replace** _

_**One thing you said, I know it's true** _

 

_**Still in love with you** _

_**I know I've been lying to myself** _

_**Baby, it's you** _

_**I don't wanna believe it** _

_**But what can I do** _

_**Still in love with you** _

 

_**You and I were over long ago** _

_**Don't know why my heart's the last to know** _

 

_**Still in love, still in love with you** _

_**I know I've been lying to myself** _

_**Baby, it's you** _

_**I don't wanna believe it** _

_**But what can I do** _

_**Still in love with you** _

 

_**I know I've been lying, lying all along** _

_**Baby, it's you** _

_**And the more I deny it** _

_**The more that it's true** _

_**Still in love with you** _

 

_**I know I've been lying to myself** _

_**Baby, it's you** _

 

Cas finished the song and said into the Mic, "I think I should go home now... Check on Dean."

He dropped the mic and it squealed till the KJ picked it up. There were tears in his eyes when he stumbled out of the bar. Ash snuck out after him. A few minutes later Ash came back in and said he made it into the Deli at least, everyone breathed a little easier.

* * *

Dean stretched and wrapped his arms around his fuzzy gorilla. His Fuzzy gorilla stirred and shifted closer. His...WHAT? His eyes flew open and Cas was passed out next to him in his bed. His first thought was, _"Awe! Shit! I just know I'm gonna get blamed for this again."_

His head was killing him and he really just wanted to go back to sleep. The fact that Cas was asleep beside him was a bonus. But he didn't want to be woken up in a couple hours by Cas losing his shit when he woke up in here thinking they did God knows what.. did they? DID THEY? Shit.. Dean was going to be really pissed if he didn't remember that. _"Stay on point Winchester. Ok... wake up Cas... try not to freak him out."_

Dean nudged Cas, _"_ Uh... Cas... _"_ Cas rolled over and smiled. _"Okay this is good,"_ Dean thought. Cas' eyes opened, they blinked a couple times then finally focused on Dean. They widened bigger, then bigger still, _"Okay... not good... NOT GOOD... MAYDAY... MAYDAY!!"_

"What the fuck!!!" Cas yelled and flew out bed. Then he grabbed his head and bent over, "Ow!!"

Dean jumped up, "No! No!... Cause... You... You... YOU!!" He kept pointing at Cas.

Cas was holding his head, "I swear to God, Dean Winchester if you say 'you' one more time, I'm gonna punch you in the junk.”

Dean covered his balls with his hands and looked offended, "You're not pinning this on me!"

"Who said I was?"

"I... I just assumed."

Cas dropped his hand, "Sound pretty guilty there Winchester..."

Dean pointed accusingly, "See! I fucking knew you were thinking this was MY fault!"

Cas yelled back waving his arms, "Well it sure as fuck isn't my fault! One of us left the bar drunk as fuck last night and...oh..."

Dean looked over at Cas suspiciously, "Oh? Oh, what Cas? Oh, well Dean, I'm a fucking asshole? How much did YOU drink last night?"

Cas rubbed his head, "You know what, forget it. I'm out of here." He turned toward the door.

"The fuck you are!" Dean jumped up and put his body in front of the door, "You don't get to just walk away and sweep this under the rug Cas. We are staying in this room till we figure out what the fuck happened last night."

Cas looked around... He found a wooden chair grabbed it and sat down, "Fine."

Dean relaxed a little, "Fine. Good. I'll go make coffee. Then neither of us leaves this room till we figure some shit out."

Cas gestured helplessly, "But... you're leaving the room."

Dean crossed his arms over his chest, "I'm coming back. I'm not gonna run off and do something fucking stupid. Now stay here. I'll be right back."

***

Dean left the room, he started the coffee maker and sat on the stool on the kitchen putting his head down on the counter. _"What the fuck? What was Cas even doing in my bed? Last night was fuzzy, but I'm pretty sure I left the bar alone, in fact, I'm pretty sure I told Cas to screw himself and left the bar.. what if I mixed that up? Maybe I said screw me?"_

Dean laughed to himself, _"Yeah, as if he would. Not like Cas would cheat on his precious fiance. Then what THE FUCK was he doing in my bed??"_ The coffee was done. Dean took down two mugs and poured them he added sugar and cream to Cas' and grabbed a bottle of aspirin and a bottle of water tucked them under his arm and went back in the room.

***

While Dean was gone Cas looked around tapping his foot.  _"Shit. how many times in my life am I going to wake up in bed with Dean Winchester and not remember it? First the Kiss, now this? God. Is this some subconscious way of trying to get back at Zar?"_

Cas didn't want to think about what else it could be. Why in his most vulnerable state, he ended up in Dean's bed and not his own. His eyes flit on the pink gorilla, that was sitting on Dean's headboard. _"That son of a bitch was too fucking adorable sometimes"_

Dean walked in the room."I got your coffee asshole."

Cas thought,  _"Now wasn't one of those times"_

Dean kicked the door closed handing one mug to Cas he set the water and aspirin on his nightstand by the phone. Then for good measure he pulled the other chair in his room against the door and sat in it. He really wasn't kidding about no one leaving until everything had been hashed out.

Dean gestured to the nightstand, "I figure If your head feels like mine, there's some aspirin and water."

Cas hesitated at first, then grabbed the bottle. He took two and put it back, "Where do you wanna start?"

Dean thought about it, "What do you remember?"

Cas closed his eyes putting his head back in his hands, "Honestly.. not much. I swear this is our fucking wedding night all over again."

When Dean didn't say anything Cas looked up; Dean was glaring at him.

"What?"

Dean clenched his jaw, " _I_ remember our wedding night."

"Oh, I didn't know that," Cas looked down into his coffee, he took a sip of it.

Dean took a deep breath, "See. Progress. Now... last night. I don't remember much so, there's that."

Cas stood up, "Okay. We need to approach this logically." He turned to Dean. "Do you feel like you've been fucked?"

Dean choked on the drink of coffee he had just taken, "Jesus Cas!'

"Well... Do you? It's a pretty simple question, Dean."

Dean ran his hand through his hair, "Uhm... No... Not in the traditional sense."

Cas nodded, "Okay... Neither do I. So we know we at least didn't do that." He plopped down on the bed.

Dean scoffed, "Trying to figure out how much you have to tell your boyfriend?"

Cas laid back on the bed and stared at the ceiling, "He's my fiance' Dean. FIANCE'." He sat up and looked at Dean. "He hasn't been my boyfriend for a little over a year. Okay?"

Dean shrugged, "Yea? Well, I don't care. I'll call him whatever the fuck I want. I have that right."

Cas leaned forward, "Oh? And why do you think you have that right?"

"Because he is fucking my husband that's why," he yelled. Dean stood up and ran a hand through his hair.

Cas blew out a stream of air and closed his eyes he pinched the bridge of his nose. "Okay, look, if we can just figure out what happened in here last night. We'll keep talking, okay?"

Dean turned and looked at him, "What do you mean?

Cas looked up at him. "We will talk about you, me and Zar. All this shit that I don't wanna talk about and we won't leave this room. But please Dean, I gotta know what happened. It's fucking me up. I'm not that guy. And if I am, I need to know that."

Dean sat back down, "Yea. I know Cas. It would be admirable if, you know, I was in his shoes." Dean looked down, "So, we're basically dressed."

Cas raised an eyebrow, "You call boxers 'basically' dressed?"

Dean smirked, “Cas if we got busy, do you think I would have left you in any clothes?"

Cas silently agreed he wouldn't have left Dean any clothes either, out loud he said, "Good point. So what? I just came in here to cuddle?"

Dean put his hand over his mouth, but he couldn't stop the laugh. It came anyway and once it did there was no stopping it. It burst forth from his mouth and rolled out and the words followed along with the laughter, "You... just... wanted... to... cuddle." He doubled over in laughter.

Cas grabbed the gorilla and threw it at Dean, "Fuck you, Dean!"

Dean was still laughing, "I would but apparently you're just into cuddling these days."

Although Dean was laughing, he was secretly pleased with the idea that Cas would come to him for comfort. That he would want to be near him, just for the sake of wanting to be near him.

Dean finally settled down, "Okay... so you don't have to tell your... you know... anything."

Cas raised his eyebrow, "You don't think a kiss like we had a couple weeks ago is relevant?"

Dean rubbed the back of his neck, "Okay... so I guess talk time then." He eyed the bottle of jack and thought better of it. "I don't know, I guess, If I were him, I'd want to know."

Cas half laughed, "If you were him, you would already be down here kicking your ass."

Dean laughed, "I fight for what's mine." Then he got more serious, "Which brings up a good question... why isn't he?"

Cas got up and picked up his coffee, he leaned against the dresser ."You wouldn't understand.”

"Try me."

"Publicity..."

Dean ran his thumb across his mouth, "Huh, yeah, I don't understand."

"You're a producers worst fear, Dean. You're every housewive's fucking dream. Zar is a rockstar with questionable morals. You drag my ass through court, his career is shot." Cas shrugged, "Probably mine too. He objected, but you held all the cards."

Dean shook his head, "Wouldn't have been enough to stop me if our roles were reversed."

Cas just smiled and shook his head setting his coffee back down. "I know. That's why I knew you wouldn't back down. Next topic."

Dean inclined his head, "Sure. Zar's off the table. Your turn"

Cas sat back on the bed, "Why did you kiss me?"

Dean laughed, "Too easy.. Ask another one."

"Dean..."

"Because I've wanted to kiss you since you walked in the deli that first day. Ask another one. Or better yet, answer this, why did you kiss me back?"

Cas rested his elbows on his knees and dropped his head, "I'll let you know when I figure that out."

Dean got up and sat down next to Cas on the bed. He felt Cas' body tense.

"Calm down, I'm being good. I'm just illustrating a point. You feel that heat."

Cas looked up at Dean like he was going to protest then stopped their faces were only about two feet apart. He quickly looked back down.

"Yeah, that heat. That's why you kissed me back. Lie to me if it makes you feel better Cas, but at least be honest with yourself." Dean got up and moved back over to the chair by the door.

"Okay, I'll admit. The attraction is... strong. But, Dean no matter what happens, no matter what choice I make at the end of this six months. I need to do it with a clear conscience. I can't cheat. Can you TRY and help me out with that?"

Dean looked over to Cas, "What do you count as cheating?"

"Damn it, Dean!"

"No, I'm dead serious. Where's your line in the sand Cas?"

Cas swallowed, "Uhm. I haven't really, thought about it.."

Dean's eyes were fixed on Cas'. "I know sex is out obviously. Can I touch you?"

Cas closed his eyes slowly he said softly, "Dean..."

"Cas. I am in love with you. Maybe that's hard for you. Maybe you don't want me to be but..."

"I don't know what I want anymore. I just know I have to do this the right way."

Dean nodded, "Okay. Then line in the sand. Give me something Cas. If you can."

Cas intertwined his fingers together and leaned on his elbows, "No sex.. of any kind."

"Course."

"No more kissing," Cas sighed reluctantly.

"Damn," Dean smirked

Cas looked at his hands for a minute. Dean waited to give him time. He finally spoke barely above a whisper, "You can touch me."

"And you won't flinch or pull away?"

Cas looked up into Dean's eyes, "I don't do that because I don't like it. I do it because I like it too much."

A small smile crossed Dean's face.

"And if we end up sleeping in the same bed again, you and I both better be wearing clothes," Cas said

Dean smiled, "Okay. Deal." Dean got up and moved the chair from in front of the door. "I think this therapy session has been very productive."

Cas laughed but didn't move from his spot on the bed.

Dean walked over and sat next to him he bumped his shoulder. "You okay?"

"I'm just processing."

"You know.. you're not a computer, Cas. Hey... my head's still killing me, your's probably is too. What do you say we test that sleeping without sex thing you were talking about."

Cas laughed half-heartedly, "Yeah, alright, but you better be good Winchester"

Dean crawled back into the bed and Cas curled up spooned against him. When Dean dropped his arm over Cas he let out an inaudible sigh.

"I will. Scouts honor."


	9. Thanks For The Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Title inspired by song Thanks For The Memories - Fall Out Boy

[Janet Jackson - Go Deep](https://youtu.be/UeFB-Qqzm1Q)  [Fall Out Boy - Thanks For The Memories](https://youtu.be/gaWTKcl5ewA)

 

Cas was just hanging up his apron and Dean popped his head in the back.

"Hey, Cas. Do you dance?"

Cas shook his head and smiled walking into the front. "Dean, I'm not sliding around the living room in my socks with you."

Dean laughed, "No. I mean. In public. Do you, you know..." He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "Do you go out dancing? Like... at a club? Or a bar?"

Cas locked the register and turning around he leaned against the counter. His mouth quirked up in a smile. "Yea... I've been known to dance."

Dean walked over and locked the door turning the closed sign. "Okay. Good. I was wondering if maybe you would feel like blowing off Karaoke and going dancing in the city. You know, with me? Tonight?"

Cas tilted his head. He smiled, "Yea. I guess that would be okay. But there are a few stops I have to make before we go."

Dean's smile widened showing those perfect teeth, "Okay. Whatever you want. I'll get ready."

***

Cas was sitting on the couch wearing a normal pair of jeans and a t-shirt when Dean came out of his room. Cas glanced up said, "Oh good god damn," shut his eyes tightly, opened them and stared at the floor for a couple seconds attempting to let his mind process all the dirty thoughts that just ran through it at one point. Dean was in jeans that hugged his ass but were baggy in the legs for movement. A black belt. Black wife-beater tank top. White button down shirt unbuttoned. He was wearing black work style boots. His hair was slightly gelled making it look sort of tousled. Cas could smell that Dean's cologne had a woodsy leather smell to it that was making him insane.

Dean said, "Good?"

"Describe how my reaction could be anything BUT good Dean. Where are we going?" Cas took a steadying breath and looked at Dean... _"Yep... god damn he looks hot."_

Dean shook his head laughing, "I told you Cas. To the city to go dancing."

Realization dawned on Cas. "Oh! You meant going out to a dance club in THE city?"

Dean nodded slowly, "Yes. Cas. In the big ol' big apple. I ain't never been." Dean used his fake hick accent.

"Okay, okay. Well then..shit. I am not dressed. " Cas ran back in his room

Dean laughed and put his feet up, "You hurry on up now honey. We don't wanna miss all the 'tractions."

"Shut it, Dean!"

Dean wasn't laughing when Cas came out and Cas thought, _"Ha! how do you like it, Winchester."_ Maybe Dean knew how to take it off, but no one knew how to dress for a club, like Cas. It was a shame he had to dress 'down' so the press wouldn't be all over him. But, Dean still hadn't seen Cas dress even remotely up. It was nice to have Dean look shocked for a change. Cas was wearing black loafers, ass hugging slacks that Cas knew he could still dance in with a small chain attached to the pocket. A blue-grey v-neck distressed t-shirt that fit snuggly and a black peacoat he wore open. He was also wearing dark aviator sunglasses. His hair he had messed up within an inch of its life. 

The first sound he heard when he walked out of his room into the living room was Dean's magazine hit the floor. Followed by Dean's exclamation of, "Son. Of. A. Bitch."

Cas slid the aviators down the bridge of his nose and smirked, "Good?"

Dean grinned, "Fuckin' A! Let's go."

***

Cas got back in the car. He put his head back against the seat and breathed out a relieved sigh then he buckled his seat belt. "Okay. Charlie was the last one."

Dean smiled and pulled away from the curb, "Everything cool?"

"Yeah, she was cool. Everyone has actually been surprisingly cool about it. No one seems to hold it against me at all. But they deserved an apology."

Dean shook his head, "Well, you know you could have just called. They do have phones."

"I figured since I have been hiding out for a week I should do it in person."

Dean nodded and got on the highway out of town, "So. You went off on 'em then?"

"Yeah... "

"What about?"

Cas looked over at Dean then back out the window, "I don't remember. I was drunk."

Dean nodded like that explained it, "Well, it happens."

"Yeah..."

They drove on in silence for a while. "Dean... How often does it happen?".

Dean glanced over at Cas and back at the road. "What?"

"Getting too drunk to remember. How often does that happen?"

Dean shrugged, "I don't know Cas. It's an expression."

Cas watched Dean's profile, "For you. Like last week. How often does that happen?"

Dean glanced over at Cas and his face was serious, "No."

"Dean, you said we need to talk more."

Dean shook his head, "Not about this."

"Dean..."

"I said no Cas. I am not having a conversation _about_ you, _with_ you."

Cas sat back and stared ahead,"Okay. Fair enough. I'll talk. In the business I'm in, I see a lot of shit. A lot of it's bad. Living like that... It'll kill you." He turned to face Dean. "I may not know what I want Dean. But I know I don't want you dead." Cas reached over and squeezed Deans leg.

Dean's hands tightened on the steering wheel before he relaxed them and let one drop beside him. "That's not gonna happen Cas."

Cas slid his hand into Dean's.

"What are you doing," Dean asked his voice sounding startled.

Cas closed his fingers in Dean's hand, "Is this not okay? "

Dean laced his finger's back through Cas'.

"No..It's good. I just didn't expect it." He ran his thumb over the top of Cas'. "Okay. I'll try not to let there be any more nights like that."

Cas squeezed his hand and smiled, "It's a start."

As they drove. Cas was smoothing his hand over the panel of 'Baby's' interior and around the rim of the window. Across the dash.

"You keep caressing my baby like that Cas, you're gonna have to buy her dinner"

Cas had a soft smile when he said, "I'll buy her anything she wants."

Dean sighed softly, "And you wonder why I fell in love with you."

* * *

The city was a little under two hours away so they had plenty of talking time. They listen to the radio. They talked about the game last Sunday they had watched. They discussed upcoming orders at the Deli. The pretty much talked about anything and everything that wasn't important. About an hour into the drive, they pulled over for gas. Dean went inside to pay and Cas pumped. While he was pumping the gas Zar's new single came on the overhead system.

As Cas was listening to and a line came up in the song, _"Have you thought this through.. What does he mean to you?"_ Cas' eyes went wide. He looked up at the overhead speaker and yelled out loud. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean!?!"

A woman looked startled and quickly got in her car. Cas replaced the pump and mumbled, "Great Castiel, now you look like a psychopath," and got in the car.

Dean came out and got in the car. He looked over at Cas who was sitting slightly hunched with his nose pinched between his thumb and forefinger.

"Hey... Cas. You alright there?"

Cas clenched his jaw, "Yeah... just work shit."

Dean looked all around confused, "What work shit? You can't get a signal out here. You guys communicate telepathically these days?"

Cas dropped his hand and tried to smile, "Its fine, Dean. We can go. I'm fine."

"Yeah okay." Dean shifted in his seat getting comfortable. He lay his head back as if he were going to sleep.

"What are you doing?"

"Just waitin'."

"For what?"

"For you to stop bullshitting me." He snuggled in the seat further.

Cas sighed, "It's Zar's new song."

"Okay. So it's personal."

"Its not personal. It's business. I'm also his producer remember. He changed a lyric without consulting me."

"Okay. But... if that's his song... doesn't he have that right?"

Cas rubbed his temple, "No. Not really. It's not that simple. He is under my label. Not that he can ever get that through his coke-addled brain." Cas covered his mouth with his hand as if shocked by what he just said.

Dean laughed disbelieving, "No offense Cas but... that sucks."

Cas rubbed his head, "Look Dean. I'm really sorry. That came off as both cold and arrogant at the same time. I'm just stressed."

Dean rubbed his leg, "Its alright Cas. What was the line?"

Cas looked over at Dean and froze. _"Shit."_

"Hey... Cas... You still with me." Dean laughed when Cas just nodded. "I asked what the line was?"

"You wouldn't know it. You hate him remember?"

Dean laughed, "Cant forget, but his song is everywhere. How the hell have you not heard it yet?"

Cas looked out the window and said quietly, "I turn it off."

"You do what now?"

Cas looked back at Dean. "I turn it off okay. This is the first time I've heard it since it's been released."

Dean tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, "Hmm, interesting. Okay. What lyric?"

"It was supposed to be an existential question. Changing one line changes the whole dynamic of the song. Son of a bitch! I'm gonna kill him..." Cas dropped his head back on the seat.

"Cas! What fucking lyric?"

"It was supposed to say, 'Have you thought this through... What's it all mean to you'?"

"Okay. What does it say instead?"

"What does HE mean to you?" Cas continued to stare at the roof of the Impala.

"Oh. So it is personal. Loverboy is jealous." Dean smiled, "Good. I was starting to wonder if he cared for you at all."

Cas sat up, "I thought we were going dancing. Can we just go dancing. I just wanna dance."

Dean started laughing and started the car, "Okay Kevin Bacon, calm down. We're going dancing.

* * *

When they got to the club and parked Dean sidled up to the line and leaned against the wall to wait their turn to enter. Cas turned around confused, "What are you doing?"

"I'm waiting in line... haven't you ever been to a club Cas?"

Cas looked at the thirty or thirty-five people in front of them. "Oh..." Cas stood next to Dean. He tapped his foot. He whistled. He tapped his fingers against his leg. He gave up after two minutes, "Fuck it... come on Dean."

"Where are we going?"

Cas put on his shades and lifted the collar on his coat. "We're not waiting in a fucking line. Judge me later okay?"

He shifted at one point away from the street and covered his face with his left hand. When he got to the door he smiled. And pulled his shades low so the bouncer could see him, "Toneeee." Cas elongated his name.

A tall, built Italian bouncer stood up. "Cas. My brotha' how you been?" He and Cas grabbed fists and one arm hugged. "How's your boy, ain't seen him in here in foreva'."

"I'll tell him he's an asshole." Cas fake laughed, "He's on tour. What are gonna do? Rock stars. Anyway. Hangin' with my homeboy tonight. You gonna make us stand in the cold?"

Tony shook his head. "Hell, no Cassie. Y'all go on in, have fun. Oh and Cas," he looked at Dean, "I didn't see shit." He unlocked the velvet rope.

Cas pulled out a fifty and slapped it in Tony's palm and patted his cheek, "Good lookin' out tony."

When they got inside Dean turned to Cas like he had grown two heads, "What?"

"Dude... Who the fuck was that out there?"

"That was Tony. He's the bouncer."

"Not him Cas. You. That wasn't you out there."

Cas tousled his own hair, "Look... It got us in ok. I... "

Dean seemed to decide he wasn't going to address it right then. "Yeah... Come on. We came here to dance."

They went to the bar and they each just got a coke. Cas figured if Dean couldn't drink because he was driving then he wouldn't either. All of the sudden, Dean started laughing pointing up. Cas looked at him quizzically they had to shout over the music. "WHAT'S SO FUNNY?"

"CAS! IT'S OUR 'WEDDIN' SONG.'" He slapped him on the back and laughed some more. Cas listened for a second.

"OH, SHIT! IT IS! THIS IS THE SONG PLAYING IN THAT DAMN CLUB! IT'S JANET RIGHT?" Cas laughed too.

"HELL YEA IT'S JANET. GO DEEP BABY." Dean laughed and started pulling Cas onto the dance floor. Cas resisted at first and then went with it. The song was your typical sexy club mix. Dean pulled Cas close. He slid his knee between Cas' legs and shifted his hips to the beat. Cas' hands slid up Deans back seductively, He gripped his shoulder and ground against Dean as the tempo picked up. Deans's hands were splayed across the small of Cas' back pressing him closer. Cas took a step back sliding his hand down Deans's chest. Dean arched back into a backbend and body rocked back up. He did a little spin and came up behind Cas. He slid a hand across Cas' stomach pulling his ass against him. Cas body rolled against Dean. His hand draped over his head to wrap around Deans's neck. Cas' eyes closed for a minute as Dean's hot breath was right against his neck. His eyes opened. Cas moved and took a step back smiling he yelled over the music, "NO... NO. THAT'S WHAT GOT US IN TROUBLE LAST TIME!"

Dean laughed, "YOU'RE TELLING ME!"

They continued to dance with a bit more space apart. They were having a good time then a burly guy came up and tried to cut in.

Dean pulled Cas back, " SORRY PAL, HE'S WITH ME."

The burly guy said, "NOT ANYMORE HE ISN'T."

Cas turned around to tell Dean he would handle it and the guy slapped his ass. So Cas turned around to tell they guy what he could do with his hand. Dean punched the guy in the face.

Cas turned to Dean, " DAMNIT DEAN!"

Then that burly bastard punched Dean in the face and sent him sprawling. Cas turned to the burly guy who smiled at him. Cas smiled back went into a boxer's stance and knocked that asshole unconscious. His smile fell. "Motherfucker."

He walked back over and grabbed Dean's hand but then a chair flew over his head and hit a far wall, _"Oh... Shit."_  
The music stopped and someone screamed "BAR BRAWL BITCHES!!" 

Cas grabbed Dean and tossed him back down to the ground. "You okay," He asked.

"Yeah, Cas... I'm fine. Did you hit that guy?"

"Shut up... talk later. Gotta get out of here."

Cas was staying low pulling Dean with him when he ran into Tony. "Cas... not that way."

"Tony... What's doin'?"

"Vultures.. out front. I think they know you're here."

Cas scuttled his back against the bar. "Shit. Fuckin shit..." He pressed two fingers to each of his temples. “Okay Tony, get Freddy to take him to his car meet us in the west ally clear? Tony... meet me right back by the back door." Tony nodded.

Cas turned to Dean, "Please don't be a dick. Just let Freddy take you the safest route to Baby and to the west ally to get me. I'll be safe. I promise."

Dean pointed at Cas, "You're explaining all this later." He got up and went with Tony.

* * *

Dean made it to the alley and Cas jumped in. "Tony... I owe ya. You have your baby sister give me a call. He handed Tony his card."

"You serious, Cassie?"

"Do I look like I'm kidding?'

"I wanna have your babies!"

Cas smiled and put on his sunglasses, "Everyone does."

* * *

"Ok now.. you need to stay in these back allies and do not, for the love of God, do not hit the main road for another six blocks at least. When you come out head down to Lexington and 67th."

Cas was scootched down in the seat with the collar turned up on his jacket and his sunglasses on even though it was night time. 

"Cas, if you don't tell me who is chasing you, I swear to god I will stop the car. Who is it, the police? The mob? What?"

"Paparazzi."

"Oh... is that bad?"

"I guess not, Dean. If you don't count the fact that I was there, with you, NOT ZAR, while he is on tour, for my label. Oh and I knocked a guy unconscious. Maybe they didn't see."

"Okay. So that's pretty bad."

Cas laughed in spite of himself, " Yeah, it's pretty bad," he smiled at Dean.

"So... where are we going?"

Cas' smile dropped, "My penthouse."

Dean looked over at him startled, "You sure that's a good idea?"

Cas stared straight ahead, "No."

* * *

Cas hurried into his penthouse closing the door after Dean walked in and stopped, wide-eyed in the entrance way. Cas looked around, "Come in and just... you know... make yourself... wildly uncomfortable," he laughed uncomfortably.

"This is where you live Cas?" Dean just shook his head, "Fuck."

"Uh... yeah. This is it. Dean... I... I gotta take care of some shit... like... now." He led Dean into the living room while he was talking. He handed him a remote. "You can watch whatever. I'm really, really sorry."

  
Dean clicked on the TV and entertainment news came on since that's the last channel Zar had it on.

 ** _"..ovak was seen partying at a downtown club tonight. But where is his long time beau, Balthazar? Well... He certainly wasn't with his young producer tonight. Mr.Novak was having too much fun defending the honor of this hottie_** (a picture of Cas helping Dean up popped up) ** _by punching another bar patron to miss his star much, it would seem..."_**

Cas sat down slowly on the couch. His phone rang. He glanced at it and said, "I have to take this," and walked in the other room.

* * *

Dean had no idea what to make of... well... everything about Cas. He was looking around his 'home' and the whole place felt cold to Dean. This was the other Cas. This is who Cas wanted to be. The Cas who Dean was keeping him from being. Dean didn't see that as such a loss. He tried not to overhear Cas' conversation, but it couldn't be helped. The whole place echoed and most of it didn't have any real walls just dividers and screens.

Cas was obviously talking to Zar. Dean hadn't actually ever heard him talk to Zar, even that was a different Cas.

"Do you believe everything you hear in the media? Well... yes. Yes... I was there but... Yes, that was him... but... Zar if you'll just... I can explain that. That asshole started it! Zar! You know I hate when people get in my face.... no. I'm not shouting." Dean heard him sigh. "What time is it there? Because I want to know. Balthy... because I do fucking care. Fine. It doesn't matter, how much have you had to drink?"

Cas got up and went into his kitchen he poured a drink. Then walked back to the main room and stared out over the balcony. His voice got quiet, "Don't do this to me... you know I worry. You know damn well why. It doesn't matter where I'm at, we are talking about you. So... that should be good. No Zar, I'm not."

He walked back into his room. Cas raised his voice again, but it was almost hysterical. "Oh really? So since my reception is good I must be fucking Dean Winchester?! Jesus! I said I'm not. Look... I'm not the one who goes away and fucks other people drunk or high Zar! Shit!" He drank the alcohol in his glass and it banged on the nightstand.

Cas walked back into the main room, he paced by the piano. He laughed incredulously, "Are you kidding me?Why because I went out?... I'm NOT fucking him! So your argument is invalid... " Cas shook his head, "You're unbelievable... if that's what you want... what do you want me to say?"  
He leaned on the piano, "Of course I care that you're leaving me, Zar. I just can't do anything about it."

Dean's head whipped around from the couch he was sitting on, _"What did he say? Did he say, leaving him?"_

Cas' voice was calmer, he sat down at the piano bench. "So now I'm not just fucking him, I'm in love with him?... Glad you have everything figured out for me Zar... As usual who the fuck cares what I want..... You're damn right I'm bitter." He inhaled and exhaled slowly, "This doesn't have to be messy. The penthouse is yours, I don't want to walk around rooms filled with you. I'll call Gabe and Eric.... I can't very well represent you now, and Michael wouldn't dare. No offense... because it's a conflict of interest. I don't have to remind you, you are under contract with Archangel Records?... Okay good... I'll have my stuff moved out for me before you return."

He hung up. Zar's wine glass was sitting on the piano. Cas got up, picked up the glass and threw it smashing into the wall.

Cas dialed his phone and put it on speaker.

Gabe answered on the first ring, "Well, well if it isn't Butch Cassidy. Where's your Sundance kid?"

Cas laughed, "Hey Gabe... Seen any good television lately?"

He went over to the bar and poured himself another drink.

Gabe laughed, "Yea... now that you mentioned it. Have you seen the one about the producer who's rockstar diva boyfriend has a full-blown meltdown? Oh, wait... that's probably not on till tomorrow."

"Oh, no. I caught that damn episode tonight. So... here's the deal. Meltdown initiated.. but it gets worse. I need someone else to clean this one up."

"Hell no! You fucked up... you clean it up. Cassie, I'd do you a solid, but Zar is going to lose it, big time. No one is gonna wanna touch this."

"Well someone is gonna have to Gabe. Cause Zar and I just split. How about you pull a dictionary out of your ass and look up 'conflict of interest'. Michael would drop him and lose us a fortune before he helped. So suck it up buttercup. You're on Zar detail."

"Well, aren't you just a whole big bag of dicks today."

"What can I say, dividing my community fucking property sets me on edge. Do you got this? Cause honestly, we can't afford this nightmare."

"Yeah, no shit we can't Cas. You couldn't keep your dick in your pants at least till the tour was over?"

"Gabe... you're really pushing it. I didn't fuck the guy alright. But I wasn't thinking and went into a goddamn fuckin nightclub, in the city, on a Friday night. So yeah. I fucked up. I can't fix this Zar thing. "

"Can't you just..."

"No, Gabe. We're done. Fix it. I have to fucking call his agent now and make sure he actually gets on stage. God! Take my advice Gabriel, swear off rockstars!"

"Alright... Alright... After the next one." Gabe laughed and hung up.

 

Cas drank down the liquid and dialed again.

"Castiel... What the fuck did you do?"

"Nice to hear from you too, Eric."

"Zar just smashed up his dressing room, stuck his tongue down some groupies throat and grabbed a bottle of wine."

"So it must be Friday."

"This isn't funny Cas. Is this a joke to you? He goes on in four hours. FOUR HOURS."

"Yeah I know, Eric. Zar left me, okay? He said he was going to go find himself another pretty young thing. Guess he works quick."

"GOD DAMNIT!! Okay... I'm calm. I got this... so... he's a free man? Anything goes? I just have to be able to get him on stage right?"

Cas pinched the bridge of his nose, "Eric, I don't care if you suck his dick yourself. Just get him on stage."

"After this shit storm... I might have to. Okay, I'll do my job. Who are you sending in? Not Mikey?"

"Gabriel."

"Okay... I'll call and update him. Sorry about your split babe."

"It happens. Take care of him, Eric."

"I'll do my best."

Cas hung up the phone.

He stared at the wall where he had broken the wine glass. Cas felt a hand touch his shoulder and whipped around startled, "Dean! I... I forgot I wasn't alone."

Dean had his arms crossed over his chest. He tilted his head to the side and wet his lips, "Cas?" He looked around the penthouse, "I think we need to get you out of this place. I don't like you when you're here."

Dean didn't look at Cas, he just went over and grabbed his coat and keys. He waited by the door.

Cas nodded, "Yea. Okay. Let me just... I gotta grab some clothes... I guess."

* * *

They drove back home in silence. Dean's head was reeling. He had no idea who this man was beside him. He knew it was his fault. He hadn't tried to get to know who Cas had become, or why. He just wanted his Cas back in Poughkeepsie, living their humble life together. Cas' life in the city was anything but humble. It was huge, it was larger than life. The way he carried himself, the way he acted, his penthouse. Even the way he spoke to people was over the top. There was no good ol' 'Novak' left in _'City Cas'_. Dean wondered who was the 'real' Cas now? Cas was also single now ... Dean couldn't help but acknowledge that.

* * *

When they got back to the house, they went upstairs and Cas slipped off his jacket and shoes. He rubbed the back of his neck and looked around like he was confused for a second. Dean kicked off his shoe's and walked up behind him and rubbed his arms. Cas shook his head, "I don't need..."

Dean turned him in his arms and hugged him, "Yeah you do."

Cas let his hands slide around Dean's waist and hugged him back. He laid his head on Dean's shoulder, "I'm an idiot."

Dean chuckled "Yeah... A little." He kissed him on the top of the head. Then the side of the forehead. Cas inhaled breathing in Dean's scent. He ran his nose up Dean's neck. Dean exhaled and kissed Cas' jaw. Cas ran his cheek against the side of Dean's. Dean nipped at Cas' chin and tilted his head back slowly. Dean ran his lips down Cas' neck, Cas moaned quietly. Dean closed his mouth into a kiss at Cas' collar bone.  
Cas wet his lips, "Dean..."


	10. Lets Talk About Sex

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song inspriation for title: Lets Talk About Sex -Salt N Peppa

[Salt 'n' Peppa - Let's Talk About Sex](https://youtu.be/MT0E72qnjro)

 

Dean looked up into Cas' eyes. Expecting hesitation. Maybe it was too soon? Cas pulled his arms out from the hold Dean had on them. Then he tangled his hands in Dean's hair and kissed him. Dean tasted the whiskey Cas had been drinking earlier.

He pulled back. "Cas... wait. How much have you had to drink?"

Cas smiled, "Don't worry. I'll remember every last detail about tonight, Winchester."

Whatever Dean was going to say was cut off by Cas' mouth crushing against his lips again. Then opening to allow his tongue to enter. Dean moaned into Cas' mouth. He lifted Cas up and pressed his back against the wall. Cas wrapped his legs around Dean. He ground his cock against him. Cas pulled back on Dean's hair dislodging their lips, he panted, "I'm sorry this isn't romantic. I'm riding on the back of a lot of anger right now."

Dean slammed him back against the wall again he growled, "We can do hearts and flowers later, Novak," he pulled Cas' head down and thrust his tongue back in his mouth. He bit Cas' lower lip and Cas' eyes turned a deeper shade of blue. Cas' legs came down and he yanked Dean into Dean's room. He kicked the door closed and pulled off Dean's over shirt then pushed him back on the bed. Dean's body slammed against the mattress. Dean smiled, quickly pulled off his shirt and saw Cas stalking toward the bed, dropping clothes as he went. Dean licked his lips. Cas was naked and gorgeous. His cock was hard and huge.

Cas' cocked a grin, "That's how I like to see you, on your back."

He reached down and yanked open Dean's button flies. "I have been thinking about getting you naked since I showed up in this town."

He yanked off both Dean's jeans and boxers and stared at him. His eyes roaming over Dean's body, "Damn.. worth the wait."

Cas slid up on the bed and put one leg in between Dean's rubbing his already hard cock. He growled in Dean's ear, "Do you know you are the worlds biggest cock tease?"

Dean was biting his lip and panting, "I have heard that."

Cas slid back off the bed, "Hold that thought.." He walked out of the room.

Dean's head dropped back on the bed. He shimmied up the bed to get more comfortable.

Cas came back in and set a bottle of lube on the bedside table, "Call it a hunch, I figured you didn't have any."

Dean laughed.

"What's so funny, Winchester?"

Dean cocked his eyebrow and smirked. He opened up the bottom drawer in his nightstand and there were a couple different bottles of lube and five or six toys. Cas' eyebrows raised. Then he smiled and looked in, "What all do have in there?"

Dean pulled Cas onto the bed, "Maybe I'll show you sometime." His hand slid down to stroke Cas' cock and he kissed his neck, "Guess I'm still being a tease."

Cas closed his eyes and moaned, he panted. "You wanna fight dirty?"

Cas reached between them and wrapped his hand around both their dicks. He stroked up and down breathing heavily.

"Fuck.. Cas.." Dean's hand slipped off and he gripped the sheet. He shifted so Cas was beneath him and ground his hips fucking into Cas' hand.

Cas released their cocks and grabbed Dean's hair plunging his tongue inside. He massaged his tongue. Their lips making warm wet sounds as they opened and closed. Wrapping his legs around Dean, Cas flipped him on his back and pinned his hands over his head. Leaning down Cas bit Dean's ear, "You wanna wrestle all day? Or would you like to give in, so I can fuck you sometime this century?"

Dean shifted and his eyes were hot and needy, "Mmmm... You win this one, Novak."

"Thank fuck," Cas sat back and shifted Dean's legs open with his knees. He squirted some lube on the tip of his dick. He teased the rim around Dean's ass with his Cock. Shifting it around in a circular motion. Applying pressure enough to feel it without penetrating. Dean moaned obscenely, "Oh. Oh. God."

Cas slicked up his fingers with lubricant and he slid one in. Dean inhaled sharply. Cas leaned over him and kissed him. "Damn," Cas eased his finger inside and pulled back out again. "Dean, you are so tight. You're gonna have to relax for me."

Dean closed his eyes his head back and panting, "Fuck... I want to. It's been ten years Cas. I'm a bit anxious."

Cas dropped his head down and put the tip of Dean's Cock in his mouth. He started to suck. Dean's body relaxed some, opening beautifully for Cas. Cas sucked slow deliberate strokes with his mouth while he fingered Dean's ass. He shifted and massaged Dean's prostate.

"Yes... Yes.. More, Cas."

Cas slid in two fingers and continued to suck Dean off and swirl his tongue around his cock. He increased the speed of his finger fucking. Dean's breathing increased as well. Cas sat back up and leaned into Dean, "Tell me what you want."

Cas fingered him faster and held him by the hair pulled his face in close to his. Cas breathed into Dean's ear, "Tell me what you want me to do to you. I need to hear you say it, Dean."

Dean bucked his hips up wildly, "Cas... Fuck me. Fuck my ass."

Cas nearly came just hearing Dean. He slid his fingers out. He sat back and stroked himself with the lube. He added a generous amount to Dean's hole too. He pressed the tip of his cock against Dean's tight entrance feeling it stretch and envelope him as he entered. Dean grabbed him and pulled him down burying Cas deep into Dean's ass. Cas' mouth dropped open and his eyes snapped wide. "Jesus.. Dean..."

Dean held Cas pressed against his body, cock deep in his ass. Cas heard a whirring sound and felt the cool of lube against his ass. He shifted and Dean clenched his ass around Cas' cock making him moan and drop his head on Dean's chest.

Dean started rimming Cas ass with a small vibrating butt plug. Rimming, pressing in, rimming, pressing in. Cas was thrusting his hips fucking into Dean.

Dean's stuttered out, "Oh.. fuck.. Cas.. stay still for a second."

Dean pressed the plug inside and Cas bit down on Dean's shoulder. He was hit on all side's by sensation. He was buried in Dean feeling the exquisite tightness of him around his cock and feeling penetrated and his prostate vibrated by the buttplug.

Dean panted, "Keep that in there for me Cas," then he grabbed him by the hair and said into his ear, "Now.. fuck my ass."

"Fuck..." Cas sat up pushing the plug further into his ass and pulled Deans knee's near him. His fingers dug into Dean's hips and he fucked into him in frenzied thrusts.

Dean had his head thrown back and his hand wrapped around his own cock. His nails were digging into Cas' thigh. Cas' cock was large and thick inside him. He was slamming into him at a punishing speed that was driving Dean into a state of delirium.

Cas didn't know how much longer he could hold on feeling Dean tighten and contract around him. Watching him with his head back, sweat beading off his naked body, legs spread, lying beneath Cas, getting fuck.

Dean jerked himself. He felt Cas fucking him and imagined the plug Dean had slid into Cas' ass fucking back into Cas' every time he thrust. Dean's body shook and he came. He tilted so he came down Cas' chest.

Cas ran his hand over the cum and then slid his fingers into his mouth moaning. Dean growled, "Damn.. you're dirty..."

Cas leaned over Dean, "You have no idea." He grabbed his hair and thrust his tongue in his mouth kissing Dean as he pumped his hips releasing into his ass.

Dean's hand smoothed down Cas' back slick with sweat. He shut off the vibration and slowly removed the plug and set it aside. Cas gasped quietly, his breathing stuttered. His body going lax against Dean, he mumbled into his chest, "That was new."

Dean ran his hand through Cas' wet hair, "Was it?"

Cas nodded against his chest, "Yeah."

Dean kissed the side of his head, "Good to know."

Cas slid out of Dean and struggled to stand, "Okay... Come on..." He reached out his hand.

Dean stretched his hand's above his head. "Cas, I'm not movin'.'"

Cas pulled on his hand, "Shower."

Dean sat up, running his hand over his slick hair, "Yeah... Yeah..." He got up and looked back at the bed, it was a shambles. "Then, we're taking your bed tonight."

Cas laughed, "Okay."

**

They got in the shower and the water felt good. Dean massaged Cas' shoulders, "Oh man... that feels good."

"It's cause you're so tense all the damn time." Dean continued massaging his shoulders and down his back. His thumbs pressing against Cas' spine working out the muscles. "So, you really hadn't tried anything like that before."

Cas popped his neck, "No. Well, you're the only guy that I..." he trailed off.

Dean's hands worked across his lower back, "The only guy that what? Cause I might hate it, but I know I'm not the only guy you fucked."

Cas turned he pulled Dean against him, "Let's just say you're the only guy who's 'fucked me'."

"Well, I know I was the first one but... what about Zar?"

Cas scoffed, "Did he strike you in any capacity as a TOP?"

Dean stuck out his chin and inclined his head in agreeance. "Okay. But, no one?"

Cas' eyes held Dean's, "Just you."

Dean stepped back and grabbed the soap, he lathered it up while he spoke, "So you're telling me, it's been ten years. No one has been inside you since me?"

"Nope. Just you."

Cas switched places so Dean could rinse off. Dean ran his head under the water and then stepped back out of the stream. "Wait... wait a second..." He pulled Cas over and pressed him against the tiles, holding his wrists. He looked him in the eyes, "Do you even enjoy it? And don't lie to me, Novak."

Cas smiled and wet his lips, his knee slid up to caress Dean's sensitive dick, "I enjoy it with you."

Dean smiled and kissed him, "Good. That's good."

***

They got into Cas' bed and neither one of them bothered getting dressed. Dean pulled Cas up against him to spoon and kissed the top of his head. "Hey, Cas. I know I always do everything backward but... Are you okay? With the whole Zar thing?"

Cas sighed, "Yeah. I think I probably should be more upset than I am, but... It was a long time coming." He rolled over in Deans's arms to lay on his back and look at Dean. "I want you to know. It wasn't all about you, ok. So, don't put that on you. We had our own issues. He had a lot of issues. A lot of shit I chose to ignore or let go... I think I'm just kind of... relieved? Like, I'm glad he left and not me. So I didn't have to be the bad guy. But yea Dean. I'm okay. So, we don't have to talk about Zar anymore."

Dean laid his head back, "Thank God."

Cas laughed, "I really appreciate you checking up on me, though. Especially cause I know you didn't want to have this conversation."

Dean pulled Cas back against him, "I just didn't want you waking up screaming again, I'm starting to get a complex."

Cas laughed his body shaking, "Goodnight Winchester."

Dean's arms tightened around him, "Night Novak."

* * *

Cas woke up to the smell of coffee in the air. He opened his eyes to see that Dean was leaning over him smiling.

“Morning, Cas?” Dean said hesitantly.

Cas slowly smiled and replied, “Morning Dean.” Then his eyes shut again.

Dean smiled and planted a kiss on him, “Come on, sleepy head we have a deli to run.”

“Screw the deli, come back to bed.” Cas tried to pull to Dean back in bed.

“That's tempting Novak, but no can do.” Dean pulled back and walked to Cas' closet.

Cas pulled himself up on his elbow and watched as Dean grabbed one of his shirts and then put it on.

Cas quirked his eyebrow up as Dean walked back over, leaned in and kissed him once again.

“Damn, I've missed that. Now get your sexy ass out of bed. I made coffee.”

Cas groaned and laid back on the bed. He heard Dean move around the room and then a pillow hit him in the face. He sat up in time to see Dean's ass as he walked out of the room.

Cas got up, dressed and then walked out to the kitchen. He grabbed a mug and pours a cup. Dean was leaning up against the bar sipping his coffee. Cas rested his hand on Dean's waist as he reached for the sugar. Dean picked it up and handed it to him, smiling into his cup.

Cas dropped a kiss on Dean's neck, "Thanks." He sits down to make his coffee.

Dean looked at him over the mug of his cup and set it down. "Coles comin' in today.. you gonna behave?"

Cas smiled stirring his coffee. He licked the spoon and set it aside, "I don't know.. are you?"

Dean laughed, shaking his head. “Come on. We gotta open up.”

* * *

Thankfully it was Saturday and it had been a slow day for the most part. The usual customers come in and there is a polite conversation.The men worked in a fluid motion around each other, almost like a dance, so in sync. Cas was back by the grill making a breakfast sandwich, he brought it out to the customer standing in front of Dean. He leaned over to hand it over and one of his hands touched the small of Dean's back. He didn't miss the smile on Dean's face and walked back to the grill. 

Later, while Cas was busy, Dean moved up behind Cas to grab extra cups while Cas was grilling and deliberately pressed his groin into Cas ass then whispered, "Careful, you don't wanna burn those."

Cas gripped the spatula tighter, Dean chuckled as he headed back to the front.

When Cole walked in for his shift Cas headed back to do inventory. He was busy putting everything in order and noticed Dean walk past out of the corner of his eye. Cas yanked him behind some shelves and pressed his body against him. He whispered, "You look hot in my shirt," then captured Dean's mouth in a kiss.

Dean tugged the strings of Cas' apron and bit his lip, "thought you wouldn't mind."

He grinned and stepped away adjusting his own apron. Thankful he has one to cover his erection. Dean couldn't believe how hot Cas can get him just by barely touching him. Dean stepped out of the walk-in with the cheese he needed, Cas smiled and continued doing inventory whistling, _"Pour Some Sugar on Me."_ Dean laughed as he walked back to the front.

* * *

When lunch time rolled around, Cole locked the door turned around crossed his arms over his chest and said, "Alright, what did you two do?"

Dean just smiled and busied himself making Cas a Pastrami on rye with Swiss and one pickle. Cas nudged Dean's hip as he walked by. When neither men answered the question, Cas looked up at Cole.

Cole ran a hand over his mouth, “Oh... shit... y'all did each other.”

“It was more of him doing me,” Dean said smirking as he fixed his own sandwich.

“Dean,” a smile played across Cas' face, “That's not _entirely_ true.”

Cole looked at both men, shook his head and said, "Alright.. neither of you is in any condition to be at work today. You two can just pack it up and get out. I got this handled."

As Cas walked over to take off his apron Cole grabbed his arm and says, “Please tell me you got rid of your rock star first.”

Cas nodded his head as he replied, “Yeah... he's gone.”

"Cool. Take a hike," Cole said smiling. 

* * *

Dean and Cas stood outside the deli. Their lunch in their hands. Cole turned the lock.

"Did I just get thrown out of my own Deli?" Dean asked incredulously.

Cas laughed and patted him on the back, "I'm pretty sure you did. Where to now?"

Dean looked around, "Love bites?"

Cas shrugged, "Sure. At least we can sit and eat."

They walked in and it was thankfully dead. Walking over and sitting down, they set their sandwiches on the table and looked around for Benny. Dean finally got up and went over to the bar. He peeked over and Benny was sitting in a lawn chair behind the counter. He had his feet up on a cooler and he was reading the paper.

"Hey, Benny. Cas and I decided to eat our lunch here. Can we get a couple beers?"

Benny just continued reading the paper. "Did ya? Well, that's mighty nice of you to stop in." He turned the page on his newspaper. "So, y'all missed karaoke. What did you do last night?"

Dean was still waiting on the beers and Benny was making him nervous. "We uh, we just went to the city. Dancing," he looked back at Cas.

Benny set the newspaper down on the bar in front of him and grabbed two beers. Dean glanced down then quickly back up to Benny who was smiling.

"I don't know which part I liked better. The reference of you as a _'hometown hottie'_ or a _'damsel in distress'_." Benny chuckled.

Dean grabbed the beers from Benny's hand, "I slugged the guy first."

Benny chuckled again "I'm sure you did brotha.'

Dean grabbed the newspaper and walked back to the table, beers in hand. He handed one to Cas.

Cas raised his eyebrow, "Why are you pouting?"

Dean grabbed his beer and took a swig, "I'm not. Stupid media. I was defending you."

He tossed down the paper on the table. Cas picked it up, crumpled it and tossed it. He said in a thick New York accent, "Fuck em. They don't know us." He smiled, picked up his beer and gestured with it to Dean's lunch. "Eat your sammich."

Dean smiled back, "Yea alright." He looked over and Cas had a smudge of mayo on the corner of his mouth. Dean reached up with his thumb to clean it off. Cas' mouth opened when Dean's thumb brushed against his lip. Dean took his hand back and said in a friendly warning, "Stop that."

Benny who was wiping down the table near them tossed the rag over his shoulder and eyed them, "Well... Bout time." He went back to the bar.

Dean looked at Cas and lifted his hands in surrender, "Is there a sign on our head's that says 'we had sex'?"

Cas leaned in so only Dean could hear him and said, "If it does can I add a sub-note that says: 'and it was really fucking good'?"

Dean bit his lip and shook his head, "Novak, I swear to God."

Cas smirked, "Yeah you do." He sat back up and took a bite of his food. He pointed at it, "This is a very good sandwich."

From the door they heard a woman's voice, it sounded like Charlie reciting, "And like a knight in a fine wool coat. Archangel producer Castiel Novak swept in and knocked the offender out cold. But this was no damsel in distress he was rescuing. Oh no, our sources tell us this hometown hottie is named Dean Winchester and he is none other then Castiel's high school sweetheart!!!"

Charlie was standing in the middle of Love Bites with a paper in her hand. "GUYS!! I want every single little tiny detai-" she looked first at Cas and then at Dean. Cas had accidentally left his hand on Dean's knee, "You guys had sex!!!"

Dean took a drink of his beer, "Yep, it's written on our foreheads," He said to Cas then turned to Charlie and grinned, "Cas would like it pointed out that it was also really fucking good."

Cas put his hand up and Charlie high-fived him as she sat down. "But wait.. what about.. you know.. the other guy?"

Cas picked up his beer, "He's gone," then tipped it back.

"Yes! Okay.. awesome. I can't believe you guys totally had sex!"

Ash came in, "Who had sex?"

Charlie shrugged, "Cas and Dean. Last night. After they beat some guy up and stole his car."

Cas looked at her, "We did not steal his car."

Ash nodded, leaned over and fist bumped Dean and said, "Sweet."

Benny brought over a few beers for Charlie and Ash and a couple lunch menu's. He knew they would be a while so he flipped the chair around and sat in it backward. He looked over at Cas, "So what did happen last night with your beau? The other one, not the one that matters." He clinked beers with Dean. "He freak about the photo?"

Cas wiped his hands off on a napkin, "Benny, anyone ever tell you, you are freakishly intuitive? Yeah. That's the basic idea. It's over. I've moved out."

Charlie's eyes got big and she leaned in like she was about to go on another tangent.

Dean put his hand on Cas' and said, "and before anyone starts asking. No. We have no idea what that means for us and frankly, we aren't really in a rush to start poking. We just like _this_ right now. Okay?"

Just then, Garth walked in the bar. He had a deli bag and he pulled up a chair at the table. He sat down and started eating. Everyone looked at him. He looked up from his sandwich, "What? I figured we were all having lunch here seeing as y'all are gathered around and there's food." He took a sip of his soda, "Did I miss anything?"

Charlie grinned, "Dean and Cas went into the city last night and jumped some guy. Then they had hot steamy sex in a back ally up against a dumpster, but then Cas' boyfriend caught them so Dean punched him and then Cas said,  _YOU SUCK ZAR_ , and they ran off and came home and had more sex."

Everyone was staring gaped mouthed at Charlie.

Garth sipped on his straw, it made a slurping sound. He set his soda on the table and looked at Dean and Cas, "So, did I miss anything?"

Dean clapped him on the back and laughed, "Cas and Zar broke up. Me and Cas hooked up last night. We're not looking too closely at it."

Garth shrugged, "Seems legit." He took a big bite of his sandwich and everyone laughed.


	11. Who I Am Hates Who I've Been

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song Used:  
> Ain't No Mountain High Enough - Marvin Gaye 
> 
> Chapter Title inspired by song: Who I am hates who I've been - Relient K

[Relient K - Who I Am Hates Who I've Been](https://youtu.be/FSbVZKs8B_8)

 

Cas finished up the dinner dishes. Dean had cooked so he shooed him out of the kitchen and handled clean up. He grabbed two beers from the fridge and brought them over. Dean was half sitting half reclining on the couch. When Cas sat down he lifted his arm and Cas settled against his chest handing him a beer.

"What are we watching?"

Dean turns down the volume on the tv, "The Giants, they're gonna take it home this year. I can feel it."

"I'm sure they are." Cas took a drink of his beer and settled more comfortably against Dean.

Dean's arm draped across Cas occasionally lifting to take a swig of his beer. "So. Tomorrow the Deli's closed. Me and the boys were gonna go out fishin'.'"

Cas laughed, "You go ahead and enjoy that."

Dean dropped his head on top of Cas', "You could come."

"Dean, as much as I like seeing your sexy ass in the morning, there is nothing short of an apocalypse that is going to get me up at the butt-ass crack of dawn to fish. No thanks."

Dean laughed, "Alright then. What will you do tomorrow? Besides be a lazy ass and sleep in?"

Cas sighed. "I gotta talk to Meg. We're thinking about signing her."

"Oh, yea? That's cool."

"Yeah and I wanted to touch base with Charlie, we have been out of the friend loop for ten years, but we used to be pretty tight."

Dean snickered, "I remember. She was the first one you told about goin' all the way with me, and I got the crazy 'you hurt him I'll kill you' speech."

"Yeah," Cas smiles at the memory.

Dean started yelling at the tv, "Yes... Yes... NO! Come on! Who taught that guy how to throw a ball! Shit."

Cas smiled and laid his head back on Dean's chest. He must have fell asleep cause the next thing he knew Dean was waking him up. He led him groggily to bed and stripped him out of his Jeans. Dean got in and pulled Cas next to him. Cas drifted back off to sleep.

**

Benny ground the truck to a stop then hopped out. Dean and Cole followed and rounded the back to grab the fishing tackle. They worked together to get the boat unhitched and push it in the water. Once that was done they climbed up and sat down. Benny is the last one in since he had to grab the cooler of beer, water, and lunch supplies. The boat drifted out farther and Benny started the engine and steered it out to deeper water. He chose a spot, killed the motor and let the boat drift.

It was peaceful out early in the morning. No one was really around unless they were also there to fish. It was quiet and comforting. Something that Dean needed to soothe the thoughts in his head. He was glad that Zar was gone, happy that he had Cas back, well he believed Cas was back. When he said they didn't want to poke at whatever was going on between them, he had meant it. But it was still a little confusing. He remembered the old Cas. The carefree teen that loved having fun, that had been his best friend first, then their relationship evolved into something more special. He would be lying if he said that he wasn't scared.

The Cas that showed up at the deli a few months ago was definitely different. He was older, wiser, and no nonsense in a way. He carried himself with a little more dignity. Which would make sense considering he had his own record label. That Cas still seemed to know how to let loose and have fun. But, the Cas he saw in the city? 'City Cas' was wildly different. The way he spoke to people. The way he handled situations. Definitely not the way the old Cas would. Almost like he would do anything to please people.

He wouldn't push Cas to give up his life in New York if that is what he really wanted. But, could he survive watching Cas walk away again? No, he wouldn't think about that right now. Right now, he just wanted to live in the moment. If his heart broke in the end, well he will survive, right? He has before, so why couldn't he again?

Dean's eyes scanned the water. There were birds flying overhead and he could hear the chirps of a few in trees. He watched the clouds roll by in the early morning sky. The breeze was cool against his face and he zipped up his jacket. He heard Benny and Cole talking quietly, mindful of the fish, but he couldn't make out what they were saying. He knew he was lost in his own world and he was thankful for that. Dean baited his line and threw it out in the water. He reached for a bottled water and unscrewed the top. The cold liquid felt good running down his throat. Dean put the lid back on and settled into a more comfortable position.

His eyes drift shut and he felt his body relax. He could hear his heart beat and his breath, it lulled him. Dean wasn't aware of how long his mind floated. What brought him back to reality was the snag of his line and the reel letting more line out. He slightly jumped and pulled back and starts reeling whatever he caught in. It's big and is putting up a fight. So he stands up to give himself more leverage and pulled the rod back more. A thrill shot through his body as a nice size fish finally showed itself. A few more tugs and he had it in the boat inspecting it. He grinned over at Benny and Cole. They in turn shook their heads and smiled. Dean sat back down to extract the hook from the fish mouth and put it in the bucket off to the side. Once his hook was baited again he threw his line back out. This is the life. No demands just a repetitive motion.

Around lunch time, Benny pointed the boat back toward shore. They grabbed chairs out of the back of the truck and sat them on the bank. Cole reached in the cooler and took out the food and a beer for each one of them. Once they were finished there was no rush to pack everything up. All three men just sat in silence looking out over the beauty. Each captivated by it in one way or another.

“I figure with all we caught this morning we have enough for a good fish fry.” Benny broke the silence.

Dean looked over to his friend and smiled, “Yeah that sounds good. It's been awhile since we've done that.”

Cole nodded his head in agreement. “So what's on your mind, Dean?”

Dean eyed the man closely and bit the inside of his cheek. Sometimes he hated talking about what was bothering him. But, Benny was one of closest friends and Cole had seen him through a hard time. So he swallowed down his pride and let a long breath out. “It's nothing really, just have a lot on my mind.” He raked a hand through his hair, he needed to get it cut soon.

Benny chuckled and shakes his head. “You can't fool me brotha. I've been fishing with you more times than I can count. Since we were both knee high.”

Dean took a sudden interest in peeling off the label on his bottle of beer. “Ben, I just don't know man. When I refused to sign those papers it was more out of retaliation. I didn't expect him to show up. I didn't expect the pull between us to be strong after so long. Then Zar ended it with Cas. I can't say that it doesn't make me happy. I'd be lying if I did. But, still I'm... well I'm scared.”

Both men looked over at him and nodded. There was no judgment in their eyes. When neither man spoke Dean continued, “When we were in the city, it was fun at first. But, then my eyes were opened to a whole new Cas. Fuck. I knew he wouldn't be the same guy I met years ago. But, damn I didn't expect that much of a difference. I'm sure that comes along with the type of business he is in. I saw several different versions of Cas that night.”

Cole leaned forward resting his arms on his knees and clasped his hands together. “Are you sure this is what you want man? Cas and I are straight now. I have no beef with him. I really didn't in the first place, other then him fucking with you.”

Dean shifted and looked at anything other than his friends. “Yeah... I mean yeah this is what I want. I guess I'm just still shocked over it all. Shit. The way he talked to people, his house, the stuff he owned. It was like he was larger than life.”

“Wait you've seen his house,” Benny asked. The look on his face Dean couldn't quiet place. “Why the hell were you there?”

Dean shook his head and laughed, “Fuck, it wasn't like that man. The paparazzi were following us. So we went there to lose them. Let me tell you that place was so fucking cold. I've never been somewhere that didn't have any feeling in the walls you know?”

Cole looked Dean in the eyes. “There is no feeling where there is no love. I'm sure Cas thought he loved Zar. Maybe he did in his own way. Look I'll give you a little advice. My wife and I were high school sweet hearts. She was diagnosed with cancer in our senior year. I had already proposed to her by then. She tried to give me a way out but, I wouldn't take it. We married after graduation. I didn't know how long I would have with her, but I didn't care. I watched her go through chemo. It broke my heart, but I had to be strong for her. When she lost her fight I thought there wasn't life after her. But, I remember her saying she wanted me to be happy. That was her last wish.” Cole wiped his face and sighed. “I guess what I'm trying to say is don't give up. Get to know this Cas. There is a still a lot of the Cas you once knew inside him.”

Dean raked a hand through his hair. “Yeah... I know that deep down. But he has a life in New York. I can't make him choose. It wouldn't be fair. But I don't know if I can watch him go.”

Benny stood up and put a hand on Dean's shoulder. “If he wants to be with you, he will work it out.” Then he gathered up all of their gear. They loaded up the truck and headed back home.

* * *

Cas rolled over and looked for his alarm to shut off. He realized he was in Dean's bed and the alarm going off was in his room. He flopped back down on the bed for a minute and spotted the pink gorrilla. It had a note pinned to it that said :

_Morning lazy bum. Coffee is set, just turn it on. See you later. ~ D_

Cas smiled. He got up and huffed to the kitchen switching on the coffee maker then went to turn off his alarm in his room. Gathering up his things, he jumped in the shower. He got out and sat down to have coffee. The place seemed too quiet without Dean there. Cas realized how much he had gotten used to Dean's constant presence in his life. What did that mean for his old life though? Could he walk out on the city? Pack it all in and move permanently to Poughkeepsi? He could still work from here, but it was a pain in the ass, not to mention all the meetings and signing and interviews. How the hell could Dean fit into that world? Cas didn't even want him to. He wanted Dean to be Dean. What did Cas want for himself though? He shook himself out of his thoughts, washed his mug and headed out to find Meg.

* * *

He found Meg at the hospital. The children were in the play area and she was supervising. She looked up from her reclining post against the door jam, "Hey Cas, what brings you in?"

"Actually, I came to talk to you. Meg, have you thought about where you wanna be five years from now?"

Meg burst out laughing, "Are you trying to sell me insurance Cas? What gives?"

Cas was annoyed. Meg was a friend and it was putting him off his game. "I'm talking about your voice Meg. You have talent."

She rolled her eyes, "Gee, thanks for noticing Cas. Your point?"

Cas rubbed his temple, "Meg, do you know what I do? For a living?"

She raised her eyebrow, "You mean when you're not pretending to be Deli guy?"

"Yes."

"Not really. Haven't given it much though Cas sorry," she patted his arm.

Cas pinched the bridge of his nose, "Let's start over. Hi, I'm Castiel Novak. I am co-owner of a very prominent record label. We are interested in signing you because we think you have talent. Well, I do, my associates still need to hear you sing. You interested?"

Meg stood up, "Are you fucking with me?"

Cas shook his head, "I assure you, Meg, the offer is very real."

Just then a little boy came up and pulled on Meg's scrubs to get her attention he said, "Is Dean gonna come sing today?"

Meg knelt down, "Not today Johnny, but he will come this weekend I'm sure. Like he always does." She looked up at Cas and grinned. "But you know what.. we have another boy here today who can sing."

She stood up and looked at Cas expectantly. He stuttered out, "I'm not... I'm not really good with kids."

Meg talked through her smiling teeth, "You want me to record a song for your little buddies in the city don't you? Well, little Johnny wants a song Cas."

Cas closed his eyes. He could not believe Meg was using blackmail. Yeah, she had star-power alright. "Yea... okay." He knelt down to Johnny, "What song would you like?"

Johnny's eyes lit up, "Can you sing the one Dean sings? The Cas song?"

The other children chimed in, "Yea! the Cas song, sing the Cas song."

Cas looked at Meg, "The what song?"

She grinned, "The Cas song. Its what Dean calls it."

Cas pinched the bridge of his nose, "And what, prey tell, is the Cas song?”

Meg gave him a full watt smile, "Ain't no mountain high enough."

Cas dropped his head and laughed, "Why am I not surprised? Fine. But then you record that damn demo AND you meet an agent."

Meg extended her hand, "Deal. I'll start the music."

Cas sat with the children gathered around him and a small microphone in his hand. Meg started the song.

_**Listen baby, ain't no mountain high,** _

_**Ain't no valley low, ain't no river wide enough baby** _

_**If you need me call me, no matter where you are,** _

_**No matter how far; don't worry baby** _

_**Just call my name; I'll be there in a hurry** _

_**You don't have to worry,** _

When he got to the chorus the children chimed in. He learned why they called it the Cas song. Apparently everytime the song said babe the children screamed Cas instead.

_**Oh baby there ain't no mountain high enough,** _

_**Ain't no valley low enough,** _

_**Ain't no river wide enough** _

_**To keep me from getting to you CAS!** _

  
_**Remember the day I set you free** _

_**I told you you could always count on me darling** _

_**From that day on, I made a vow,** _

_**I'll be there when you want me,** _

_**Some way, some how** _

  
_**Oh baby there ain't no mountain high enough,** _

_**Ain't no valley low enough,** _

_**Ain't no river wide enough** _

_**To keep me from getting to you CAS!** _

  
_**Oh no darling** _

_**No wind, no rain** _

_**Or winters cold can stop me baby, no no baby** _

_**'Cause you are my goal** _

_**If you're ever in trouble;** _

_**I'll be there on the double** _

_**Just send for me, oh baby, ha** _

  
_**My love is alive** _

_**Way down in my heart** _

_**Although we are miles apart** _

_**If you ever need a helping hand,** _

_**I'll be there on the double** _

_**Just as fast as I can** _

_**Don't you know that there** _

  
_**Ain't no mountain high enough,** _

_**Ain't no valley low enough,** _

_**Ain't no river wide enough** _

_**To keep me from getting to you CAS!!** _

Cas was laughing by the end of it and all the children cheered. One little girl kissed him on the cheek and whispered, "I'm glad you came back Cas. Dean's not sad now."

Cas smiled and hugged her, "I'm glad too."

* * *

Cas knocked on Charlie's door when she opened it he held up a box of crackers and a can of cheez wiz. From his fingers, he had a bag with two Pepsi's in it and beef jerky. Charlie smiled, "Cas.. are you trying to seduce me?"

Cas laughed as she opened the door and let him in. She took the bag from him and sat on the floor in her living room. She opened one of the soda's and took a drink. "So.. this is 'we need to talk about Dean' food. What's up?"

Cas took out a cracker, sprayed on some cheese wiz and topped it with some beef jerky before popping it in his mouth. He leaned back against Charlie's couch. "I don't know. Is it just me or is he oddly perfect?"

Charlie nodded eating a cheese wiz sandwich, "He is pretty perfect."

Cas open his soda and took a drink. He laid his head back on the couch cushion and closed his eyes, "Makes it kind of hard to be a fuck-up."

Charlie punched him in the leg, "Cas. You are not a fuck-up. You do good things. Sure, you're a dick sometimes while doing good things, and some of the shit you spout out on those business conversations I can't even understand." She shrugged and took another cracker, "But you look out for your people, that's not bad Cas. Its just, you know, different then Dean."

Cas made another cracker and jerky tower and ate it. He looked around the room. "I sang to the kids today, at the hospital. Meg made me."

Charlie laughed, "I can see that"

"Do you know what Dean sings to them?"

Charlie nodded, "Ain't no mountain high enough."

Cas sighed, "Yea. Call's it the 'Cas song'. What if... what if this mountain is too high for him?"

Charlie laid her head in Cas lap and staired at the ceiling. "It's not. This is Dean, Cas. He just has to see that you're not all glitz and glamor and bullshit. If he sees you actually love your job, when you don't hate it, and you are good at it. He won't ask you to give that up. But you're going to have to be willing to give a little too. You'll work it out."

Cas ruffled her hair, "How'd you get so smart?"

She shrugged and licked the cheese wiz off her cracker, "Just lucky I guess."

* * *

When Cas got back, Dean wasn't home yet. He decided to clean the apartment. Cleaning always helped him when he had a lot on his mind. He had gone into Dean's room and was adjusting the pillows on the bed when he heard a tinkling sound. He didn't know what he had knocked off the bed so he pulled out the bed some and stuck his hand under. His hand closed around a chain of some kind. When he pulled it out he just stared at the gold band dangling from the chain then he sat down slowly on the bed.

When Dean came inside he called out, "Hey Cas, you home?"

"Back here."

Dean walked to his room and Cas was sitting on his bed, holding his ring. _"Oh shit."_ Dean thought.

Cas looked up at him, "You kept it?"

"Yea."

Cas lovingly ran his hand across the smooth surface, a smile played on the edges of his mouth.

"Why is it on a chain?"

Dean put his hands in his pockets, "I uh... I used to wear it. I stopped when you were here cause I didn't wanna upset you."

Cas took the ring and hung it back on the bedpost. He stood up and walked over to Dean, "I'm not upset.'

Dean had been looking at the ground, he looked up into Cas' eyes, "No?"

Cas shook his head, "No." He wrapped his hand behind Dean's neck and pulled him in for a kiss. Dean ran his hand's through Cas' hair and deepened the kiss. He shut the door. Turning back towards Cas he removed his shirt and kicked off his boots. Cas did the same. They kissed again and Dean ran his hand's up Cas' back, Cas undid Deans jeans and dropped them to the floor. Dean stepped out of them as Cas removed his own. He lay back on the bed, inching up. Dean came down on top of him. His mouth coaxed Cas' lips open. He kissed him slow and deep. Each tongue swipe sending erotic images through Cas' brain. Dean ran his hand down Cas bent thigh. He pressed up against him and rocked his hips. Dean whispered against Cas' lips, "I want you Cas. Can I be inside you?"

Cas' breath unsteady he nodded, "Yes, yes Dean."

Dean's teeth scraped over Cas' neck, making him moan. He ran a hand through Cas hair and looked down on him. His eyes taking in all of Cas' features, he studied his face. Then he said in wonderment, "How is it possible you're here right now?"

Cas ran his hand over Dean's hip. He looked into his green eyes, "I was just wondering the same thing."

Dean grabbed the lube and put a generous amount on his fingers. He massaged Cas' hole, slowly relaxing him. He slid one finger in and worked it slowly. Cas begin moving his hips, "Dean.." he said with a sense of urgency.

"I know Cas, bear with me." Dean pulled out and reinserted two fingers. Moving deliberately slow. He worked his fingers around expanding and twisting. Cas was writhing, "Dean..Come on.. you're killing me."

Dean kissed him adding a third finger, "Shhh Cas, we'll get there."

Cas tried to thrust his hips faster, but Dean held him still while he continued to slowly and methodically finger fuck him. Cas panted, "Dean...please...please."

Dean leaned in breathing heavily in Cas' ear, "Do you want me to take you now Cas?"

Cas was a wreck he hissed out, "God yes. please, Dean..."

Dean sucked on Cas' lower lip. he pulled out his fingers and sat up on the bed. "Okay, Cas. Come here," he pulled Cas over to straddle him, "I want you to ride my cock."

Dean pulled him into a kiss and Cas moaned in his mouth. He positioned himself over Dean's erection. Dean added more lube to his hand and stroked himself, he held his cock firmly in place so Cas could sit on it. As Cas lowered down Dean worked his cock in a circle easing it into Cas' ass. "Jesus... Cas. You are so damn tight. It really has been ten years."

Cas was rocking his hips, shifting Dean's size inside him he panted out, "Yes... it has."

Dean kissed him, "You okay?"

Cas smiled, "Yes.. I'm better than okay."

Dean's eyes were boring into Cas', "Ride me Cas. Show me how much you want me."

Cas let out a shaky breath. He tipped his head back and closed his eyes. He begins to move up and down on Dean's cock. His hand's dug into Dean's shoulders, "Oh... Dean..." his breath stuttered out. His breathing picked up with his rhythm. He slid up and came down hard again and again on Dean's cock. He grabbed Dean's hair and growled in his ear, "I love your cock in my ass. Your big, hard fucking cock."

Dean's mouth dropped open that was hot as fuck. "Fuck!.. Cas.... Oh god... Oh my god."

Cas was pounding down furiously on Dean's cock. His fingertips bruising into Dean's shoulders. He was spouting a series of yes's in a staccato, "yes, yes,yes, yes,yes."

"Dean!!!" He grabbed his cock and rapidly jerked it making himself come in a stream against their chests. Dean grabbed Cas' shoulders thrust once deeply and came. "CC... CC... Cas... fuck..."

Dean let his head drop back against the wall, his breathing erratic. Cas pulled off making both of them hiss. He then remained straddling Dean and let his head drop onto Dean's shoulder. Dean's breathing a little more regular but still winded he said, "Holy fuck Cas. Where did that mouth come from?"

Cas smiled into his shoulder and shrugged, "Guess I was just inspired."

"Yea, well I almost lost it the moment you started talkin'. That was so fucking hot Cas. Jesus."

Cas chuckled and kissed him, "I'll try to keep that in mind."

Dean put his arms around Cas and kissed his forehead, "I was afraid I was gonna hurt you."

Cas snuggled in closer to him and wrapped his arms around him, "Well... you didn't."

"Good. I don't ever wanna hurt you."

Cas' eyes started to drift closed, he opened them quickly, "We need to shower, I'm falling asleep."

* * *

After the shower, they slept in Cas' bed again because they had wrecked Dean's. Cas went to curl up with Dean like he normally does, but Dean pulled him over to lay on his chest instead. He wrapped his arm's around Cas and fell asleep. Cas lay there a minute just listening to Dean's heart beat before he drifted off as well.

 


	12. Talk Dirty To Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ain't No Rest For The Wicked is actually by Cage The Elephant.

[Poison - Talk Dirty To Me - Chapter Title Inspiration](https://youtu.be/ZBsFntczDoM)

 

Cas and Meg were standing outside Love Bites when a long black limo appeared in the distance. It was pumping the Leviathan's new song out of the windows loudly.

**Oh, there ain't no rest for the wicked**

**Money don't grow on trees**

**I got bills to pay**

**I got mouths to feed**

**And ain't nothing in this world for free**

**No I can't slow down**

**I can't hold back**

**Though you know I wish I could**

**No there ain't no rest for the wicked**

**Until we close our eyes for good**

The limo came to a stop and a man got out. He was dressed in an all black suit with a burgundy tie.

Meg whispered to Cas, "I don't like him."

Cas whispered back, "You haven't even met him, trust me, he's the best."

The man approached them and he gave Meg the once over look, then he said to Cas, "Well isn't she just a slice of apple pie, that someone has burnt the crust on? She'll do nicely."

Cas sighed and extended his hand, "Crowley, always a pleasure. This is Meg."

Crowley turned and extended his hand to Meg, "Meg is it? Well hello, I'm Crowley. I have come to take you away from, all this," he looked around with distaste. "That is of course provided that Castiel is correct and you can sing."

Meg crossed her arms over her chest, "Oh, I can sing."

Crowley smiled, "Good. You ready to come with me and prove it? We need a demo from what I've been told."

Meg looked at Cas.

Cas nodded and said, "It's okay. You're in good hands. Just go, sing your ass off and come home. Life as you know it Meg is about to change."

Meg let out an exaggerated sigh, "Okay. Let's get this over with."

Crowley led her to the limo, he looked back at Cas, "Don't worry Castiel, we'll make her a star."

He got in the Limo and pulled away. Cas thought, _"Man..I hate that guy."_

* * *

Cas was changing out the soda fountain when he felt arms come around him. He smiled.

"How'd it go with Meg," Dean asked.

Cas leaned back into the hug. "It went fine. She is off now recording a demo to show my associates. I just hope I did the right thing sending her out on her own."

Dean stepped back and leaned on the counter. "Meg is a tough chick, she's got this. Plus, If your aim really is to throw her in the spotlight, you can't hold her hand the whole way."

"True." Cas agreed. He finished closing up the soda machine. He looked around, the place was empty so he stepped into Deans's arms and kissed him. Cas pulled away, "Work to do. Dammit."

Dean laughed and smacked his ass as he walked off.

* * *

During lunch, Dean had to run errands for the Deli, so that left Cas on his own. He went upstairs and switched on the TV. He flipped through when he noticed Gabriel so he stopped and turned up the volume. He was heading Zar through a door and the press were hounding him with questions. One reporter yelled, "Zar.. is it true your relationship with Castiel is on the rocks?"

Zar turned to answer, but Gabe pushed him inside and said,"Everything about Balthazar rocks, that's why we signed him."

The door shut and the reporters were left with their own musings. Cas turned off the TV. “Yep, Gabe is good at his job. That was the best non-answer ever.”

* * *

Cas was getting everything together to open the Deli back up when there was a tap on the glass. He looked up and felt his blood run cold. Cas walked over and unlocked the door.

“What are you doing here, Dad?”

James Novak walked in and looked around the Deli. “I came to check on you. Zar says you broke up? Explain yourself boy.”

“I don't have to explain myself to you,” Cas replied leaning against the counter.

“We decided you would free yourself from this place.”

Cas ran a hand through his hair. “No, you decided. I didn't choose anything! You gave me no other choice. It was Dean or my family. I wasn't stupid I knew you meant Anna.”

“You need to get your shit together and fix things with Zar. Dean Winchester has always been an anchor around your neck draggin' you down.”

“That's the problem with you, Dad. I loved Dean and you could give two shits about that. You just wanted me to be the good son and do what I was told. Well, I did. But I'm not letting you call the shots anymore.”

"Who cares if you loved Dean. You were a kid, you didn't know jack about life. I wasn't having you throw away a lucrative career and your whole life to chase some boy in a muscle car.”

"I guess it doesn't matter that it broke my fucking heart. That I cried on the plane to Harvard. Yes, dad, I cried. I know how much you hate displays of emotion, but get over it. You didn't care if I hurt you just wanted me to be 'successful'."

"Son, it wasn't like that. Your mother and I just wanted what was best for you."

"Screw you dad. I am successful now. Very fucking successful. So much in fact that I can do as I choose and I choose Dean. Now kindly get the fuck out of our deli."

"You're making a big mistake boy."

“No, my mistake was listening to you.” Cas temper was on the brink of an explosion he said curtly, "Get. Out.”

Cas held the door open as James stormed out. He sighed and ran a hand over his face.

* * *

Dean stood in the back, a box of bread still in his hands. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. He knew Cas' father was a jackass, but he had no idea he was also cruel. Dean decided he would talk to Cas about it later.

he came out from the back and set the box down. Cas looked up startled. Dean smiled. "I came in the back. Hey was that your dad I just saw storm out."

Cas pinched the bridge of his nose, "Yea..."

"What did he want," Dean asked as he was loading the bread into the bin.

Cas shrugged, "Just came in to be an asshole."

Dean nodded. "Sounds about right."

* * *

Meg returned from the city triumphant. She felt she had done really well with the Demo and she gushed about how nice everyone was to her and said things like, 'any friend of Cassie's is a friend of mine'. Cas made a note to call his partners the next day and find out their opinions. Dean suggested they should celebrate Meg's; "leap into stardom," and go over to Love Bites for some pool and dancing. They called up the gang and headed over.

At the bar, they were sitting around talking and having some beer's. Meg was contentedly sitting in Lu's lap and he seemed to be in a pretty good mood. He even sat at the table with the rest of the crew. As another song came on Lu pulled Meg onto the dance floor.

“Come on Dean let's dance,” Charlie said pulling Dean to the floor.

“I can't dance Charlie,” Dean replied laughing.

“Bullshit, I know better than that Winchester.”

Dean looked over at Cas for help. Cas smiled and shook his head. He gave Dean a look that clearly said 'I'm not helping'. He'll pay for that later. Dean will make sure of it. Charlie wraps her arms around Dean's neck and steps in close. This wasn't unusual for them. They have danced more times than Dean could remember over the years. Dean wrapped an arm around Charlie's waist and pulled her close so he can spin her around. The laughter coming from her made Dean smile. Charlie broke free and stepped back a little. She wiggled her hips in the process, smiling like crazy. She threw her head back and giggled when Cas came up behind her, grabbed her waist and moved his body with hers. Dean moved around to dance behind Cas, grabbing his waist to pulled him close. He put a leg in between Cas' and took control of the way he swayed. All three of them dance close to the music, laughing like a bunch of kids. When the music switched to a slower song all three walked back to sit down. Dean grabbed his beer and took a long pull, trying to catch his breath. Cas pulled his chair closer to Dean's and draped his arm behind him.

“Nice moves for an old man Winchester,” Charlie said teasing.

“Hey! I'm only a year older than you. Besides I don't hear Cas complaining ...” Cas leaned in catching Dean's lips in a kiss to shut him up. Dean was left speechless and grinning like an idiot when Cas broke the kiss.

Meg pulled Lu back over and sat down in his lap. She took a drink of her beer. "Nice to see you two getting along so well." She winks at Cas.

Ash and Garth walk in shortly after. “It's about time you two show up,” Cas said fist bumping Garth.

"We wouldn't miss giving Meg a hard time about her new fancy career," he laughed and hugged Meg.

"You're just jealous of my baby," Lu said and kissed Meg.

  
“When you gonna let me give you a run for your money again Winchester,” Ash asked. “Up for a game of pool?”

  
“Ash how many times do I have to beat you before you give up,” Dean asked shaking his head.

  
“Come on we'll play teams. You and Garth against Cas and me.”

  
Meg rolled her eyes, "This ought to be good."

  
Dean looked over at Cas and agreed. They all walked over to the tables and grabbed a stick. Cas racked the balls and stepped back. Dean lined up his shot leaned over the table.

“How about we make our own bet? Loser sucks the winner off,” Cas said in a whisper by Dean's ear. Dean swallowed and breaks the balls up, they scatter perfectly around the table, one striped ball goes in.

Dean smiled wickedly, “Oh it's on, Novak.”

Garth jumped up excitedly and aims, knocking in a solid ball. "Oops," he shrugged. "Sorry, Dean."

"Thanks, Garth," Cas said laughing and pats him on the back.

Cas leaned in, winked at Dean and sinks the shot. Ash broke two balls apart but doesn't sink any.

Dean leaned in again and smirked at Cas, "Let me show you how it's done."

Cas leaned on the table and said, "Yeah Winchester, show me how you drive it in deep."

Dean's stick bounced off the cue ball and it spun helplessly around hitting nothing. "Damn it, Cas. You cheat."

Cas smiled, "I don't know what you're talking about."

Meg laughed, "What's the matter, Dean? Can't handle your balls anymore?"

Dean glared, "Shut it, Meg. My hand just slipped okay"

Meg laughed again, "Okay... sure... if you say so."

Cas went to make his shot. Dean said, "Oh baby.. slide your hand down that hardwood."

Cas took his shot and broke two balls, sinking both of them. He walked behind Dean and said,"I love it when you talk dirty," and bumped him with his hip.

The game whittled down till just the 8 ball is left. Ash went for it but didn't succeed. Dean lined up his shot, "8 ball, corner pocket."

Cas leaned over and whispered in Deans's ear, "Come on, all you gotta do is make that shot. Then you can fuck my mouth till you come."

Dean's hand jerked, knocking the cue ball wild, it ends up sinking the 8 ball and the cue ball.

Cas smiled evilly, "Scratch. That means we win." Then he winked at Dean.

Dean threw the stick on the table, "Screw it. It's a win for me either way." He grabbed Cas by the neck and kissed him.

Cas said quietly, "Someone's turned on."

"Yeah, no shit. You've been teasing me all night"

They went to sit back down at the table. Meg looked over at Cas, "So what now?"

Cas inclined his head, "Now. I call my guys tomorrow. Make sure they agree with me, and they will. Then we get you a lengthy, exhausting contract. You sign it. We start making you famous."

Meg shook her head, "Just like that?"

Cas took a sip of his beer, "Just like that. Trust me, Meg, this is what I do. Make nobodies, into somebodies. In fact when I met Zar..." He trailed off, "Well, it's what I do. Don't worry about."

He noticed Dean's arm slipped off his shoulder at the mention of Zar. _"Good going, Novak,"_ he chastised himself.

The evening waned on and finally everyone said their goodbyes congratulating Meg again and headed home.

* * *

When they got upstairs Cas was worried Dean was still mad about him mentioning Zar. But before he had time to even consider it Dean had him pressed against the wall in the hallway and he was kissing him. Open wet passionate kisses. Cas was breathing hard and kissing him back with everything he had. Dean kissed down his neck then dropped to his knees. He opened up Cas's pants and pulled out his cock. Cas voice was shaky, "Dean..."

Dean smirked, "A bet's a bet. Doesn't mean I'm not gonna enjoy the hell out of this."

Dean worked Cas' cock with his hand getting him hard. Cas dropped his head back against the wall. Dean dropped Cas' pants and underwear to a heap at his feet. He slid his tongue up the vein underneath Cas' erection. Cas let out a shaky breath. Dean sucked on his finger getting them really wet with saliva. He deep throated Cas as he slid one finger into his ass. Cas hand went to Dean's shoulder and held on, "Oh... god... Dean..."

Dean worked his finger while he bobbed up and down on Cas' cock. Cas was breathing heavily and finding it almost impossible to remain standing. Cas grabbed him by the hair and thrust his hips forward fucking Dean's mouth. Dean increased speed on his finger. Making Cas buck and writhe. "Dean... dear god... please... oh... fuck..."

Dean shifted his finger and massaged Cas' prostate. Cas pulled Dean's mouth down on his cock. Come shooting hard down his throat. Cas let out a fierce grunt and released Dean's head. Dean pulled back slowly, sucking the rest of Cas' come from the tip of his cock. He sat back on his knees and smiled, "That was hot."

Cas sunk to the ground. "Jesus, Winchester, you trying to kill me?"

Dean laughed, "Just wait, I'm not done with you yet Novak."

Cas slipped off his shoes and his pants the rest of the way. His dick was already starting to get hard again just seeing Dean there on his knee's. He removed his shirt. Then he sank down to Dean and pulled off his shirt. He kissed him, tasting the salty sweetness of his own come on Dean's tongue. He pulled Dean to standing position and pushed him into his room. He came up behind Dean and started losing his belt. He said into Dean's ear "I wanna take you from behind. I wanna watch that sweet ass of yours contract while I'm fucking you."

Dean dropped his head back against Cas, "Oh hell yes."

Cas dropped Dean's pants and was surprised to find Dean had gone commando tonight. Dean quickly kicked off his shoes and stepped out of his jeans. He crawled onto the bed and lay on his stomach, ass in the air invitingly.

"Fuck," Cas exclaimed and he draped his body over Dean's, rubbing his cock against his ass. Dean moaned and shifted his hips seductively. Cas grabbed the lube and put two fingers in Dean. Dean hissed then started moaning "Oh Cas... oh damn..."

Cas had one hand on Dean's ass feeling it move with every thrust of his fingers. He worked Dean's asshole getting it stretched for Him. Cas' cock was now hard again watching Dean writhe, his ass bounce in the air. He removed his fingers and knelt behind Dean. he rubbed his cock against Dean's ass, teasing. He leaned over Dean, "Tell me what you want."

Dean shifted his hips and moaned out. "Cas.."

"Tell me Dean.. what do you want me to do?"

Dean was panting, "Fuck me.. fuck me."

"Is that what you want? You want me to fuck your ass, Dean? You want me to fuck you hard?"

Dean shivered, "Fuck.. yes Cas.. please..."

Cas squirted lube down Dean's hole, then he shifted his hips and buried himself inside Dean.

Dean gasped, "Oh god!...yeees."

Cas grabbed Dean by the hips and slammed him against him. Dean moaned out, "more..yes..."

Cas picked up the rhythm. He was so aroused. "I love watching my cock disappear in your ass, Dean. Watching as I fuck you."

He smacked Dean's ass and Dean bucked, "Yes... fuck yeah..."

He smacked his ass again watched how it rippled and tightened around his cock. Dean was thrusting back against him and moaning obscenely, "Yes... Dean... fuck my cock... that's right... shove your ass against me."

He smacked Dean's ass again and then grabbed his hips slamming in hard and rough. Dean screamed out "Yes!...Cas"

Cas was pounding into him and at the brink of coming, "Yes Dean... scream my fucking name. Let everyone know who's fucking you."

Dean reached down and stroked his cock, "Oh fuck... yes Cas... I'm..." He came hard all over the bed. Cas leaned over him getting a better angle and slammed in deep, coming with a growl, "Fuck..Dean...fuuuck..."

He pulled out and sat on the bed. Dean moved away from the wet spot and lay on his back.

Dean was panting, "Damn... gotta tease you more often..holy shit Cas."

Cas ran a hand through his hair breathing erratic he said, "yea..that was...damn Dean."

"I don't think I can stand in the shower, Cas."

Cas laughed, "Me either. Maybe we'll just clean up with a washcloth tonight."

Dean threw his hand over his head, "sound's like a plan."

Cas kissed him. "You go get in bed, I'll get the washcloth."

Dean nodded and hobbled out of the room.

* * *

After they were cleaned up and tucked into bed Cas laying on Dean's chest. Dean said, "So.. I heard you talking with your dad today."

Cas sighed, "Yeah? Sorry about that."

Dean waved it off. "He's an asshole. No big surprise there. But... Cas, I didn't know that you had hurt too. When you left, I guess I figured maybe you didn't love me back. I didn't know your dad made you go. I'm sorry."

Cas wrapped his arms more tightly around Dean, "Leaving you... that was the hardest thing I've ever done. I guess I figured you had gotten on with your life, so I tried to get on with mine. But you were always there. In my mind, in my heart."

Dean kissed him on the head, "Well.. you're here now. That's what matters"

Cas leaned his head up and kissed Dean, "I'm glad I'm here." He snuggled back into Dean.

Dean ran his hand through his hair. "Me too Cas. Me too."


	13. Gives You Hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title inspiration  
> Gives You Hell by All American Rejects
> 
> There is some love making smut :) It's my (SassySides) first time writing a love scene. Thank you to my co-author who encouraged me to actually try writing one.

[Chapter Title Inspiration - Gives You Hell - All American Rejects](https://youtu.be/1UWgRwVRbxc)

 

The following morning Cas and Dean open the Deli as usual. Their morning coffee finally waking Cas up to function with some normalcy. He stood back and watched Dean move around and wondered if he would ever tire of watching that man. He tied on his apron and walked to the grill to start preparing breakfast sandwiches. If you would have asked him a few months ago if he thought he would still be here he would have said no. But, now he couldn’t imagine his life without Dean.

One by one their usual customers started coming in. Smiling faces and some grumpy but, it was nice to see them.  Cas and Dean worked together to get the customers fed and leaving the place happy. Around nine Cas took off his apron and told Dean he had to make a phone call. Giving him a quick kiss on the cheek before walking upstairs.

Cas made his way up to the rooftop to call Michael and Gabe. He wanted to hear their opinions on Meg. He didn't bother going to Charlie's since it was early. That woman might actually kill him if he disturbed her beauty sleep.

Cas sat down and pulled out his phone. He scrolled down to the record labels contact number and hit send. Gabe's secretary greeted him cheerfully and then connected him on a conference call.

“Castiel, always a pleasure to hear from you,” Michael's voice came on the line.

“Cassie babe what's up,” Gabe asked.

“Hey, guys. So have you listened to the demo from Meg De'Vil?” Cas leaned back in the chair.

“We have and I do believe she has star quality,” Michael answered. “My fear is she is a little rough around the edges. Nothing we can't handle. Although with Gabe handling Zar now, she is your responsibility Castiel.”

“It's nothing I can't handle. This is me you are talking about after all. Crowley has agreed to be her agent.”

“I'll draw up a contract to send over to you to sign in a day or two. However we do need a lawyer to go over it as well,” Michael said.

“I have one in mind, my brother in law actually. I'll call him,” Cas replied.

“You're brother in law? How quaint Castiel,” Michael said in his usual sarcastic tone.

“So you're admitting you're married now Cas,” Gabe asked his voice teasing.

Cas pinched the bridge of his nose. “You guys are assholes,” he replied and didn’t bother to hide his irritation.

Both men laughed.

“Cassie, make sure to get those signed and sent back. We will handle what we can on our end.”

“I've got this. Later dickheads.” Cas hung up, ran a hand through his hair and made his way back to the stairs.

**

Cas walked down to the Deli and grabbed his apron. Dean was busy talking to a few customers. Cas bumped Dean's hip as he walked by and smiled, then refilled Mr. Brunetti's tea.

“How did the phone call go,” Dean asked and placed his hand on Cas' back.

“It went well. They love Meg, which I never doubted. So we are signing her.”

Dean smiled and kissed Cas on the cheek, “That's good. I always knew that girl would go somewhere.”

Mrs. Brunetti said something in Italian to her husband and then looked at Cas and Dean. “You look so happy now Dean. I hope it stays that way.” The Brunetti's got up to leave and Dean walked around the counter. She placed her hand on Dean's cheek and said, “Remember to live a happy life, never go to bed angry.”

Cas smiled and moved around Dean and walked them to the door. He bent down to kiss Mrs. Brunetti’s cheek. Then as they walked out the door he waved. Something to the left caught Cas’ eye. He averted his attention to that direction and saw a white limo with a black van following coming around the corner.

Cas was confused until he saw Zar step out of the limo. “Son of a bitch,” he muttered under his breath and took off his apron. He hung it up on the wall and headed to the door again. Dean went to follow him, but Cas put a hand on his chest and said, “I'll handle this babe.” Then he walked out the door and over to Zar.

A million things ran through Cas’ mind. The foremost thought was why the fuck is Zar here? Followed quickly by why the fuck did he bring the media? He watched as a couple cameramen jumped out of the van, their eyes on him. _“Motherfucker.”_ Cas thought to himself.

Zar flashed him a smile and pulled him into a hug. Cas' arms hung loosely around the other man’s waist.

“What the fuck are you doing here,” Cas asked under his breath so only Zar could hear him.

“Play along darling for the paparazzi,” Zar whispered and then pulled back and placed a kiss on his cheek. Flashes went off and Cas had to bite his tongue. “I'll be here a few days. I knew you would be happy to see me.” Zar's voice was loud enough for everyone to overhear. Cas watched him turn around to get in the limo. Before Zar shut the door he looked at Cas and gave him a wicked smile. The limo pulled away from the curb, the van followed closely behind.

Cas wanted to punch something but, instead he walked back in. Dean was eyeing him closely so he pulled Dean into the back room by his arm.

“What the fuck was all that about,” Dean asked.

Cas ran a hand through his hair. “I don't know but, I'm sure as fuck going to find out.”

He wrapped his arms around Dean’s waist and pulled him into a kiss. Then he put his forehead on Dean’s and said, “I'm calling Gabe,” then kissed Dean's forehead and took off upstairs.

**

Cas was pacing back and forth like a caged animal waiting for Gabe to answer. “Why the fuck is Zar here Gabriel,” Cas asked as soon as the call connected not even giving Gabe a chance to say anything.

“Well hello to you too.”

“Cut the shit Gabe why the fuck is Zar here and not on tour?” Cas' voice rising in anger.

“Damn it he said he was going to take a few days off. He didn't say he was going to Poughkeepsie.” Gabe’s voice clearly sounded exasperated.

“Yeah, well it looks like he is off his leash,” Cas barked. “You have to handle this now.”

“Fine, okay, I'll be out tomorrow morning first thing. Just play along with whatever game he is playing until I get there.”

Cas didn't even say bye he just hung up the phone and sat down heavily in a nearby chair. He tried to calm himself taking a few deep breaths. His leg was bouncing from pent up anger. Rage maybe? Cas ran a hand through his hair and sighed. When his breathing returned to normal he walked back down to the deli to continue his shift.

**

After his shift ended Cas walked over to the hotel. He asked the desk attendant which room he was in and then made his way up. Cas knocked on Zar's hotel room door. Zar opened it and smiled. "What a lovely surprise darling. I didn't expect to see you so soon, come in," he opened his door wider.

Cas shook his head "No. I think... You wanna take a walk?"

Zar sighed dramatically, "Very well. If you insist." He grabbed a coat and closed his door.

They walked for a while in silence, finally sitting on a bench near the park. Cas rubbed his forehead, "Zar. What are you doing?"

Zar folded his hands in his lap, "Do you remember when we met Cassie? What first attracted you to me?"

Cas nodded, he knew Zar wouldn't get to his point till he was ready, "Yes. Edna St. Vincent Millay. I was surprised you had read her poems."

Zar leaned back on the bench, dropping his hand casually to rest behind Cas and he recited, "I shall forget you presently, my dear. So make the most of this little day, your little month, your half a year. Ere I forget, or die, or move away and we are done forever; by and by I shall forget you, as I said, but now, If you entreat me with your loveliest lie. I will protest you with my favorite vow. I would indeed that love were longer-lived and oaths were not so brittle as they are, but so it is, and nature has contrived to struggle on without a break, thus far..... I can't recall the last line."

Cas stared straight ahead and finished the poem, "Whether or not we find what we are seeking is idle, biologically speaking."

Zar nodded, "Yes. That was it. How apropos it is now don't you think?"

Cas angled his body to look at Zar, "Did it slip your mind that you left me? What’s your game Zar?"

Zar laughed, "Oh Cassie you're always so literal. Well, the way I see it, it’s a lot like what you said to me when you took over my band from your father."

Cas shook his head, "I said you were arrogant and a pain in the ass to work with."

Zar smiled, "Yes you did. Then you said but with talent like mine, it didn't matter, people would smile and take the sodomy."

Cas pinched the bridge of his nose, "Yea...and?"

Zar ran his hand down Cas' arm, "Well... lube up darling because as long as I'm here, your ass is mine." He stood up and adjusted his sunglasses.

Cas stood and stepped in front of him. He continued his fake smile knowing the media was probably watching, "What do you hope to gain from all this?"

Zar touched Cas face, "Well...YOU...of course. Kiss, kiss." Zar made the kiss face and then walked off.

Cas was fuming all the way back to the Deli.

**

That night Dean was unusually quiet through dinner. Cas tried to make conversation but, couldn’t pull more than ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers from him. He knew Dean had every right to be upset. Hell, he was pissed himself. But he didn’t want Dean to completely shut down on him.

After they had eaten both men cleaned up the kitchen together. Cas grabbed a couple beers out of the fridge. Dean went in the living room and found an old western movie on and was watching it intently. Dean sat down and leaned back into the couch. Cas followed him and handed him a beer then sat down next to him. Dean murmured a thank you and turned his attention back to the TV.  Cas moved closer to Dean and draped his arm behind Dean’s head. He really didn’t pay attention to the movie. There were too many things running through his head. Every once in awhile he would turn his gaze back to Dean and watch the light from the TV flicker in Dean’s green eyes.

When the movie was over Dean turned off the lights and held his hand out. Cas took it and followed him into Dean’s bedroom. Once inside, Dean closed the door behind them. Cas pulled Dean close and softly covered Dean’s lips with his own. They kissed slowly with gentle nips. He paused long enough to undress Dean, his eyes never leaving Dean’s. Cas put his hand on Dean’s chest and walked him back toward the bed. Dean sat down on the edge and watched in awe and Cas took off his shirt painfully slow.  A smile crossed Cas’ face and he ran a hand down his own chest to the beginning of his jeans. His hand hesitated, licked his lips and unbuttoned them. It was so quiet in the room he could swear he heard Dean’s heart beat quicken. Cas unzipped and then rocked his hips as he pushed them and his boxers down to pool at the floor. Dean ran his eyes over Cas then gripped the sheets tight, desperate to touch but couldn’t move. He wanted to freeze this moment in time. Cas brought his hand up to his mouth and licked it a few times and then dropped it back to his own cock.  He stroked it a few times and let his head fall back. His moan was almost a growl low in his throat. Cas’ other hand came up to catch a drop of pre-come on his finger and he brought it to his mouth. He gave Dean a wicked smile and opened his mouth to suck on his finger. Dean’s breathing hitched at the sight.

Cas walked over to the table, opened it and grabbed the lube out. Then he turned back to Dean and placed his hand on his chest pushing him back up on the bed. He straddled Dean’s hips, put his hands on each side of his face and leaned in to kiss him. Cas nipped at Dean’s bottom lips and then ran his tongue across asking for entrance. Both of his hands grabbed Dean’s hair and deepened the kiss, their tongues searching the others mouth. Dean’s moan made Cas’ pulse race. Cas broke the kiss and trailed his mouth along Dean’s jaw. He lightly bit and licked his way down Dean’s throat. Cas stopped and bit the skin where Dean’s neck and shoulder met and made Dean throw his head back. Cas continued trailing his tongue down Dean’s chest and licked over his left nipple. Then took it in his mouth and sucked gently. Dean’s back arched off the bed and a soft moan escaped his mouth. Cas grazed his teeth over the sensitive skin and moved lower. His tongue ran over each of Dean’s ribs and Dean’s hands flew up to grab at the headboard. The only thing he could hear was his heart pounding in his ears and the moans coming from Cas. He closed his eyes tight and lost he himself in the moment.

Cas’ tongue dripped in Dean’s belly button and pulled back slightly to blow his hot breath over the area. A loud moan came from Dean and Cas couldn’t take it anymore he hurried the rest of the way down. Cas took Dean’s cock in his mouth and sucked all the way down to the base in one go. Dean bucked his hips wildly and a cry broke came from him. Cas felt around on the bed for the lube. He popped the cap without taking his lips off Dean. He poured the liquid on his fingers and moved his hand down, finding Dean’s tight hole, and moved his fingers on the outside making sure to coat it well. Cas slid one finger inside, feeling the tightness constrict around it. Dean was panting and bit his lip while he rocked his hips in time to Cas’ thrusts of his finger. Cas sucked Dean’s cock in deeper down his throat while pumping his finger in and out. Dean’s entire body shook and his moans were broken. Cas added a second finger and heard Dean hiss. Once Dean’s body adjusted Cas crooked his finger and found Dean’s sweet spot. Cas let Dean’s cock slip from his mouth when Dean damn near came off the bed.

Cas scissored his fingers while he continued to push and pull them in and out. Dean moaned and panted erratically and Cas thought he would come just from hearing it. He kissed the inside of Dean’s thigh when he added a third finger. Cas felt Dean open up more and knew he was almost ready.  He turned his gaze up and watched Dean arch and writhe beneath him and was struck by how amazingly perfect Dean was. Cas realized he wanted to look into Dean’s eyes as he made love to him. He pulled his fingers slowly out of Dean, eliciting a gasp of pleasure from him. Cas scooted back on the bed and pulled Dean over to straddle him. He leaned back against the headboard and eased Dean slowly down onto his cock. Dean arched his hips and tried to press further down. But, Cas held his hips steady as he pushed inch by inch up into Dean’s welcoming heat.

Dean thought he was going to pass out as Cas filled, stretched, and claimed his body. His mind swam and he felt like he was floating. When he felt Cas bottom out he let a sob fall from his lips and closed his eyes. Cas cupped both sides of his face making Dean open his eyes. Their gazes locked and Cas' hands dropped back to Dean’s hips. At the same time, Cas gripped Dean’s hips tighter to move him he leaned forward and kissed him slowly. Cas moved Dean up and pulled him back down painstakingly slow. Moans came from both of them.

Dean wrapped his arms around Cas’ neck letting the feeling take him away but, never taking his eyes off Cas. They had made love before but nothing like this. Every time he pulled Dean back down Cas thrusts his hips up into Dean. Cas knew his grip on Dean would leave bruises tomorrow but, he had to hold on for fear of losing himself completely.  Dean pulled Cas impossibly closers and kissed him like his life depended on it. Dean broke the kiss and touched his forehead to Cas’, their breath hot between them, sharing the same air. Cas moved Dean back up almost completely off and then let him slide back down.   

Cas slid his hands to splay against Dean’s back. Dean, finally free to move, quickened the pace but, never broke eye contact. His breathing increased and his mouth fell open in awe of the desire he saw swimming in Cas’ eyes. He rocked his hips forward hitting just the right spot then pulled up and back before coming down again on Cas.

Cas’ hand slid in between their bodies to wrap his fist around Dean’s erection bringing him closer to climax. He matched Dean’s movements with his own and stroked Dean at the same time. Each thrust hitting Dean’s prostate making the man cry out in pleasure. Cas knew with only a few more precise moves and strokes Dean would come. So he kissed him again long and slow, pulled back and increased his hand speed. Dean’s breaths became shorter and they locked eyes. Cas nodded his head and Dean threw back his head as he painted Cas’ chest in hot come.

Cas pulled Dean close, wrapping his arms around him, enveloping him. With Dean’s head cradled on his shoulder he thrusted up, pulling Dean down and emptied himself into Dean.

Neither man spoke. They stayed like that for a few minutes that felt like hours. They listened to each other’s breathing regulate, wrapped tightly in each other’s arms. Their hearts beat as one. Dean brought his head up and kissed Cas' just the barest brush of his lips. He slowly slid off him. Cas slid down to lay back on the pillows. Dean grabbed a towel lying by the bed wiped off Cas' chest then laid his head on Cas' chest. Cas' arms wrapped tightly around Dean holding him as if afraid he would lose him if he let go. Dean pulled the comforter up and over them, his breathing fading off as he quickly fell asleep. Cas wiped a tear from his cheek and drifted off to sleep.

**

Gabe showed up the next morning as promised. He checked in with Cas and then went over to see Zar. He was back within the hour and it didn't look good. Cas let him into the Deli re-locking the door since they were technically closed today. Luckily Dean had gone out to pick up supplies. He poured Gabe a coffee and handed him the cream and sugar packets. Gabe dumped eight sugar packets in his coffee and six creams. Cas shuttered. That man was forever drinking sweet drinks. Once Gabe had made his coffee they sat down at one of the booths.

"I can't pull him out Cassie," Gabe finally spoke up and shook his head.

Cas leaned on the table, "What do you mean you CAN'T pull him out?"

Gabe shrugged putting his hands up in the air. “He made this too big. He has media coverage. Zar has some show scheduled in a little club and the fans... man Cas the fans are going wild." Gabe gestured swiping his hand in an arch in front of him, " _Big time rock star, hits small town!_ I got nothin' buddy. I can't pull him out"

Cas sat back pinching the bridge of his nose, "This is just fucking great."

Gabe leaned back, crossing one leg over the other, "Look. Just lay low for a few days. He will be out of here by Friday. I'll try and keep him away from...all this," he gestured around the deli.

Anger rushed through Cas. He was pissed. Hell, that was an understatement. "By 'all this' you mean Dean."

"Yea. Okay. I mean Dean. And Cassie, you gotta figure out a way to keep your hubby in line. We can't afford bad press two months before Zar's tour is over."

Cas ran his fingers over his eyes and rubbed his temples, “Alright. I'll talk to Dean."

Gabe leaned in, "One more thing Cas. You gotta be nice to him. We don't need the media catching wind that you two broke up."

Cas tried very hard not to shout. He gritted his teeth, "What?"

Gabe sighed and his tone was nearly condescending, "Cas, baby, I'm not telling you to sleep with him. I’m just saying in the public eye, you need to be a little nicer to Zar and... not so nice to Mr. Mister. Capiche?"

Cas ran his hand through his hair. He let out a sigh. "Fuck. Fuck! You’re right. I don’t like this though. Fucking fuck! Okay. I'll talk to Dean. He is going to freak out, but I'll talk to him."

Gabe looked at Cas speculatively, "Are you dueling light sabers with this guy?"

Cas looked up, "Am I what?"

"You know. Are you banging him? Boffing him? Fucking his brains out?" Amusement flashed through his eyes.

Cas rubbed his head. A tension laugh escaped his lips, "How the hell is that any of your business?"

Gabe looked offended, "I'm your friend."

Cas sighed again, “It’s complicated Gabe okay. Just handle Zar, please. I'm going to have my hands full. What the fuck am I gonna tell Dean?"

Just then Dean walked in; he set down two bags of ice, "Tell me what?"

Gabe looked at his wrist, there was no watch on it, but he said. "Oh wow. Look at the time. I better be off. Catch you later Cas." He went to the door and Dean let him out. Locking it behind him.

Dean turned and looked at Cas, "What was that about?"

Cas dropped his head on the table.

***

Dean stormed up the stairs Cas hot on his heels. When he got to the living room he turned around, "What the fuck do you mean he isn't leaving?"

Cas ran both hands through his hair, "Can you just calm down. It’s not my call okay?"

"No! No Cas its not okay. I don't want that fucker in my town."

Cas grabbed his arm and spun Dean to face him, "It's not just your town Dean. He is a big star. People want to see him."

Dean pulled his arm out of Cas grasp; he wiped his mouth with his hand, "People? People like you maybe?"

Cas sat on the couch pushing both thumbs against his eyelids, "What the hell are you even talking about? Why would I want to see him?"

Dean turned, "Fine. Then don't see him."

Cas looked up at Dean, "What?"

Dean shook his head, "Don't see him Cas. While he is here. Avoid him like the fucking plague."

Cas put his head in his hands and breathed out slowly, "I can't do that."

Dean sat on the coffee table directly in front of Cas, "What? Is there more you’re not telling me?"

Cas just sat with his head in his hands.

Dean pulled his arms down, "Look at me Cas. What aren't you telling me?" His eyes searching Cas’.

Cas looked at Dean; there was sadness in his eyes that made Dean very nervous. "I have to... play nice with him in public. For the Media."

Dean released an exasperated breath, "Wow.”

Cas leaned his head back on the couch and closed his eyes, "and... I can't...” He cleared his throat. "I can't be seen... with you... intimately."

Dean stood up abruptly; he ran his hand through his hair, "Really? Are you gonna be seen 'intimately' with Zar? What the fuck Cas!"

Cas sighed and looked up at the other man, "Dean...”

Dean shook his head and pointed at Cas, "No. I can't talk to you right now." He went in his room and slammed the door.

Cas needed a drink. He got up, slamming the door behind him and left to go to Love Bites.

***

Cas was on his third drink when Benny came over and handed him the bar phone, "It's for you brotha."

Cas took the phone, as soon as he said hello Dean said, "Come home," and hung up.

Cas handed the phone back to Benny, paid his tab and went home.

When he got there Dean was sitting on one of the kitchen stools. He hugged Cas then kissed him. "I'm still mad. Really mad. But... I love you and I don't wanna sleep alone."

Cas wrapped his arms tighter around Dean, "I don't want to sleep without you either."

Dean looked at him and pushed Cas’ hair back, "I'll play nice for your cameras. But I don't like it."

Cas blew out a slow breath and started to explain, "Dean look...”

Dean cut him off, "We’ll talk more about this tomorrow… let’s just go to bed."

Cas agreed and they went to bed in Dean's room. Dean pulled Cas tight against him in the spoon position and Cas wrapped his arms around Dean's arms. Cas laid awake for a while like that and thought, " _What the fuck am I gonna do?"_


	14. Holding On And Letting Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ross Copperman- Holdin' On and Letting Go - Chapter Title Inspiration
> 
> Song for Meg and Zar is by Christina Grimmie & Mike Tompkins -  
> Originally by Fall Out Boy & Alicia Keys - Light Em Up On Fire Mashup  
> and of course Gives You Hell is actually by All American Rejects (but for our purposes we pretend both of those are "Fallen Angel's" songs
> 
> Larger Than Life - Backstreet Boys  
> It's Gonna Be Me - Nsync

[Holding On And Letting Go - Ross Copperman - Chapter Title Inspiration](https://youtu.be/Awr_jzijeIU) 

[Light Em Up On Fire Mash Up - Christina Grimmie & Mike Tompkins - Fall Out Boy & Alicia Keys](https://youtu.be/Q8iSMt2EOF4)

 

The next morning Cas was busy making breakfast sandwiches for travelers who came to see Zar sing at the club later that night. The Deli hadn’t been that busy since the fair. Actually that day had been a cake walk compared to this one. Cas personally couldn’t wait for this day to be over. Zar would be gone and Cas wouldn’t have to deal with his antics anymore. Gabriel had managed to keep the media away from the Deli at least. Cas would have to get something nice to repay the man. The place was so crowded Dean had to call in Garth to help out.

Around lunch, Cas and Garth had to go get more supplies. They simply were swamped and Dean wanted nothing more than to relax with a beer. At least there was a lull in business for the time being. Dean had his back turned to the door when he heard it open.

He didn’t turn around just simply said, “I’ll be right with you.”

“Please take your time,” Zar replied sarcastically.

Dean felt his blood run cold and he turned around. “Son of a bitch.”

“What a colorful vocabulary. Did you learn that in your little backwoods high school?”

Dean balled his hands into fists at his sides but, ignored the comment. Damn it why did he promise to play nice?

“You must be Dean. I’ve heard virtually nothing about you… interesting.”

Dean leaned back against the wall behind the counter. He ran a hand through his hair and counted to ten. “You must be the asshole my husband used to fuck.” Dean spat out. “His EX fiancé.” His jaw clenched.

Zar laughed, “Oh darling trust me after this little game is up he’ll be coming back home. He will tire of you. I’m sure you have been a fun distraction. But, I know what my Cassie needs and it isn’t found in a tiny town, in an even smaller deli.”

Before Dean could say anything more Cas and Garth walked back in. Dean stormed over to Cas and leaned in, “Get him the fuck out of here right now Cas. Before I rip his ass apart limb from fucking limb.”

Cas walked over and grabbed Zar’s arm. He opened the door and stepped out with him letting the door close behind him. “For the love of everything holy Zar please stay out of the Deli,” Cas said and dropped his hand from Zar’s arm.

Zar just laughed and turned back to Cas. A reporter walked up, Zar grabbed Cas and kissed him. A flash went off and Zar pulled back and smiled. The reporter said thanks and took off. Cas stepped back and said, “If you ever pull a stunt like that again I’ll remove your balls.”

Cas turned back around and saw Dean standing by the door. He knew Dean had seen the kiss. Cas walked back in the Deli. He wanted to explain. Anytime he tried Dean gave him the cold shoulder. Dean refused to look at him or speak with him for the rest of their shift.

**

Sometime in the early evening the sky opened up and released a torrential downpour. Cas thought that suited his mood perfectly. Dean had barely spoken to him after Zar left. Not only was there Karaoke tonight, but Cas had to present Meg for the first time in the spotlight. Gabe said he already talked to Zar about singing a duet with her and they had been rehearsing most of the day. At least Meg understood why Cas wasn't there with her at Zar's hotel to rehearse. Cas would be meeting them at Love Bites. He knocked on Dean's bedroom door.

"Hey. Dean, I'm heading over to Love Bites now." Cas called through the door

"I'm going with Cole. I'll see you there." Dean called back through the door.

Cas waited a second; trying to think of something to say but when nothing came to him he just left.

He grabbed an umbrella and headed over. Cas arrived just as Zar was walking up. Cas stepped under the awning and shook off his umbrella and closed it. Zar eyed him from his tight black v-neck sweater down his form fitting jeans all the way to his black boots. "Cassie, You look...delicious tonight."

Cas bit back a retort and forced his mouth to smile. "Thanks."

Zar motioned to his band and entourage, "I'll be inside in just a second. I want to talk to my love alone for a minute."

They agreed and shuffled in Gabe mouthed, "I'm sorry," as he went in.

Zar walked closer to Cas and Cas whispered, "That's close enough Zar."

Zar pouted, "Fine. Well, just thought I would mention that you really should sit with me. Wouldn't want to raise suspicion."

Cas rubbed his forehead, "I'm tired of this game Zar."

Zar shrugged, "So am I. Let’s just go home darling and we can forget about this whole sorted affair."

Cas laughed and ran a hand across him mouth. "That's not gonna happen. I'll see you inside Zar."

Cas walked in without giving Zar a chance to say anything else. He grabbed a napkin and a pen and wrote a quick note. He asked Benny to please give it to Dean. The note said simply:

_I have to sit at Zar's table. Please don't freak out. I swear it's JUST BUSINESS. ~ Cas_

Then he went, gave a few hugs and pats on the back to people he knew and sat next to Zar. Zar dropped his hand to Cas' thigh. Cas leaned in as if he were saying something funny to Zar and whispered in his ear. "Get. Your. Hand. Off. Me."

He sat back and smiled and Zar laughed as if he had said something funny and moved his hand.

Dean and Cole arrived a little later. Cas looked over to them. Cole noticed Cas watching and draped his arm over Dean's shoulder and whispered something in his ear. Someone took a picture. Cas didn't know if Cole was trying to make him jealous or help out against the onslaught of the press. But even knowing Cole was straight, Cas had to do everything he could to stay in his seat when Cole slapped Dean's ass and headed to their table. Dean got the note from Benny and read it. He shook his head and went to sit with their friends. Meg and Lu were sitting over by Cas and Zar.

Cas got up and went to the stage. The place was packed almost to the door. Cas thought it was a good thing Charlie had come in early and snagged a table up front for the gang to sit, as there were no more table's and very little room to stand. He grabbed the mic and waited for it to quiet down.

"Hi, everyone! It’s an exciting day today!" The crowd applauded and screamed. "Archangel records just signed a new singer Meg De'Vil and you guys get to witness her first performance!" The crowd hooped and hollered. "Balthazar has graciously agreed to share the spotlight and one of Fallen Angel's hit songs to do a duet with Meg. So without further ado I give you Fallen Angel's and Meg De’Vil!!!" The crowd screamed and some shouted, _"We love you, Zar!"_

Meg and Zar got up on stage. Zar grabbed the mic. He smiled charmingly, "Thank you. I love you too." More screams ensued. “Well, it is a pleasure to be here. We have our singers and most of my band, but my guitarist has yet to show up." The crowed went, 'AWE!' Zar laughed, "I know it but all is not lost. I happen to have brought along my darling Castiel's guitar from home. Maybe, if we give him a round of applause he will come up and help us out."

The crowd applauded loudly. Cas leaned into Gabe and said, "I’m gonna kill him"

Cas stood up and waved and smiled. He jumped up on stage and took the mic. "How can I say no to encouragement like that?" He grinned big for the sake of the fans and Meg's career. He took the guitar case Zar handed him and opened it taking out his guitar. Strapping it on, he said into the mic again, "Okay. Let’s try this again. I give you Fallen Angels and Meg De’Vil singing  Light 'em on Fire!"

Meg started in with the ohs.

**Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh**

**Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh**

Zar started singing:

**_Be careful making wishes in the Dark (dark)_ **

**_Can't be sure when they've hit their Mark (mark)_ **

**_And besides, in the mean, mean time_ **

**_I'm just dreaming of tearing you apart_ **

**_I'm the deep deep dance with the Devil_ **

**_You know the world can never get me on my level_ **

**_I just got to get you out the cage_ **

**_On my own lovers rage_ **

**_Gonna need a spark to ignite_ **

Meg broke in:

**Oh oh oh oh oh**

**This girl is on fire**

**This girl is on fire**

Zar **:** _(light em up up up_

 _Light em up up up_ **)**

**Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh**

_(See the spark spark)_

**Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh**

_(in the dark dark)_

**This girl is on fire**

**Looks like a girl but she's a flame**

**So bright, she can burn your eyes**

**You better look the other way**

**And you can try, but you'll never forget her name**

**Cause she's on top of the world**

**The hottest of the hottest girls**

**Say, Oh oh oh oh oh**

**This girl is on fire**

**This girl is on fire**

Zar **:** _(light em up up up_

 _Light em up up up_ **)**

**Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh**

_(See the spark spark)_

**Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh**

_(in the dark dark)_

**This girl is on fire**

Zar sang:

**Yeah yeah yeah yeah**

**Cause my songs know**

**What you did in the dark**

Meg came back in strong:

**Fire!!**

Zar **:** _(light em up up up_

 _Light em up up up_ **)**

**This girl is on fire**

_(light em up up up_

_Light em up up up_ **)**

**Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh**

_(See the spark spark)_

**Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh**

_(in the dark dark)_

**This girl is on fire**

Zar and Meg sang together:

**_This girl is on fire_ **

**Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh**

 

Zar put his arm around Meg. "Wasn't she wonderful?!" He kissed her on the cheek and said into the mic, "Welcome to the sweet life baby girl."

The crowd applauded and screamed. Flash bulbs were going off like crazy and Meg was beaming and really wanted a drink. She got off stage and kissed Lu and slid onto his lap.

Cas took off the guitar and placed it back in his case. He took the mic from Zar and Zar wrapped his arm around his waist and kissed his cheek saying into the mic, "That was wonderful darling," before jumping off stage and being herded over to his table by his body guards.

Cas clenched his teeth then tried to make his smile look genuine. "Okay everyone. Zar is going to take a break till his guitarist shows up. So as you know Benny has decided its 'Boy Band Night' for karaoke. So, since I'm up here, I'll do a song." The crowd cheered and Cas put in his song request and he locked eyes with Dean. He nodded to him as he started singing;

**_I may run and hide_ **

**_When their screamin' my name, alright_ **

**_But let me tell you now_ **

**_There are prices to fame, alright_ **

**_All of our time spent in flashes of light_ **

****

**_All you people can't you see, can't you see_ **

**_How your love's affecting my reality_ **

**_Every time I'm down_ **

**_You can make it right_ **

**_And that makes you larger than life_ **

****

**_Looking at the crowd_ **

**_And I see your body sway, c'mon_ **

**_Wishin' I could thank you in a different way, c'mon_ **

**_'Cause all of your time spent keeps us alive_ **

****

**_All you people can't you see, can't you see_ **

**_How your love's affecting my reality_ **

**_Every time I'm down_ **

**_You can make it right_ **

**_And that makes you larger than life_ **

****

**_All of your time spent keeps us alive_ **

**_YEA! Boy you know!_ **

****

**_All you people can't you see, can't you see_ **

**_How your love's affecting my reality_ **

**_Every time I'm down_ **

**_You can make it right_ **

**_And that makes you larger than life_ **

****

**_Yeah, every time I'm down_ **

**_Yeah, you can make it right_ **

**_Yeah, and that's what makes you larger than life_ **

****

**_All you people can't you see, can't you see_ **

**_How your love's affecting my reality_ **

**_Every time I'm down_ **

**_You can make it right_ **

**_And that makes you larger_ **

**_That makes you larger_ **

He pointed directly at Dean.

**_That makes you larger than life_ **

Cas winked and got off the stage. Zar was furious. He hissed in Cas' ear, "I have had enough of this Castiel. You will stop behaving like a child this instant!"

Cas grinned, "What’s the matter _dear_ , you didn't like my song?"

Zar placed both his palms flat on the table and stood slowly, "My guitarist is here. I think I'll perform now."

He stepped away to get his band ready. Gabe leaned in, "Cas, come on...”

Cas just shook his head, "Fuck off Gabe."

Gabe sat back in his seat and downed his drink.

Zar got back up on stage and grabbed the mic, "Hello again beauties!" The crowd applauded. "My band is full and complete now. What do you say I sing you a new song, hasn't even been released yet?" The crowd screamed yes. Zar smiled and took center stage. He winked at Dean. Dean went to stand and Cole put his hand on his shoulder and pushed him back in his chair whispering something to him. Dean crossed his arms over his chest and nodded to Cole.

Zar blew a kiss to Cas then said in the mic, "It's called Gives You Hell, hope you like it."

**_I wake up every evening_ **

**_With a big smile on my face_ **

**_And it never feels out of place_ **

**_And you're still probably working_ **

**_At a nine to five pace_ **

**_I wonder how bad that tastes_ **

****

**_When you see my face_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_When you walk my way_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

****

**_Now where's your picket fence love_ **

**_And where's that shiny car_ **

**_And did it ever get you far_ **

**_You never seemed so tense love_ **

**_I've never seen you fall so hard_ **

**_Do you know where you are_ **

****

**_And truth be told I miss you_ **

**_And truth be told I'm lying_ **

****

**_When you see my face_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_When you walk my way_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_If you find a man that's worth a damn and treats you well_ **

**_Then he's a fool you're just as well_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

****

**_Tomorrow you'll be thinking to yourself_ **

**_Where'd it all go wrong?_ **

**_But the list goes on and on_ **

****

**_And truth be told I miss you_ **

**_And truth be told I'm lying_ **

****

**_When you see my face_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_When you walk my way_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_When you find a man that's worth a damn and treats you well_ **

**_Then he's a fool, you're just as well_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

****

**_Now you'll never see_ **

**_What you've done to me_ **

**_You can take back your memories_ **

**_They're no good to me_ **

**_And here's all your lies_ **

**_You can't look me in the eyes_ **

**_With the sad, sad look_ **

**_That you wear so well_ **

****

**_When you see my face_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_When you walk my way_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_When you find a man that's worth a damn and treats you well_ **

**_Then he's a fool you're just as well_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

****

**_When you see my face_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_When you walk my way_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

**_When you hear this song and you sing along but you never tell_ **

**_Then you're the fool, I'm just as well_ **

**_Hope it gives you hell_ **

****

**_When you hear this song_ **

**_I hope that it will give you hell_ **

**_You can sing along_ **

**_I hope that it puts you through hell_ **

The crowd went wild applauding and screaming. Zar waved and handed the mic to Benny. Benny wiped the mic off on his shirt then spoke, "Alright all. That sure was a treat. Were gonna start regular karaoke now. So if you just came to see yourself a rock star, you're free to go. Dean, you wanna kick us off?"

Dean smiled at Benny, "Sure Benny, I got a song."

He got up there told his song to Benny. Benny laughed and set it up then headed back to the bar. Dean looked over at Zar and Zar tossed his arm over the back of Cas' chair. Dean grinned and winked at Cas. Cas sat up straighter and took the shot Gabe pushed over to him.

Dean started singing:

**_It's gonna--be--me_ **

**_Oh, yeah_ **

****

**_You might've been hurt, babe_ **

**_That ain't no lie_ **

**_You've seen them all come and go, oh..._ **

**_I remember you told me_ **

**_That he made you believe in_ **

**_No man, no cry_ **

**_Maybe that's why_ **

****

**_Every little thing I do_ **

**_Never seems enough for you_ **

**_You don't wanna lose it again_ **

**_But I'm not like him_ **

**_Baby, when you finally,_ **

**_Get to love somebody_ **

**_Guess what,_ **

**_It's gonna be me..._ **

****

****

**_You've got no choice, babe_ **

**_But to move on, and you know_ **

**_There ain't no time to waste_ **

**_You're just too blind (too blind), to see_ **

**_But in the end, ya know it's gonna be me_ **

**_You can't deny_ **

**_So just tell me why_ **

****

**_Every little thing I do_ **

**_Never seems enough for you_ **

**_You don't wanna lose it again_ **

**_But I'm not like him_ **

**_Baby, when you finally_ **

**_Get to love somebody (somebody)_ **

**_Guess what (guess what)_ **

**_It's gonna be me_ **

****

**_It's gonna be me_ **

**_Oh yeah..._ **

****

**_There comes a day_ **

**_When I'll be the one, you'll see..._ **

**_It's gonna-gonna-gonna-gonna-gonna_ **

****

**_It's gonna be me_ **

Cole jumped on stage to sing backup and grabbed the other mic:

****

**_All that I do_ **

**_Is not enough for you_ **

**_Don't wanna lose it_ **

**_But I'm not like that_ **

**_When finally (_ ** _finally **)**_

**_You get to love_ **

**_Guess what (_ ** _guess what **)**_

****

**_Every little thing I do_ **

**_Never seems enough for you (_ ** _for you babe **)**_

 **_You don't wanna lose it again (_ ** _don't wanna lose it **)**_

**_But I'm not like them_ **

**_Baby, when you finally_ **

**_Get to love somebody (_ ** _love...)_

 **_Guess what (_ ** _guess what **)**_

**_It's gonna be me_ **

****

**_Every little thing I do (_ ** _Oh...)_

**_Never seems enough for you_ **

**_You don't wanna lose it again (_ ** _don't wanna lose it **)**_

**_But I'm not like them_ **

**_Baby, when you finally (_ ** _baby when you finally **)**_

**_Get to love somebody_ **

**_Guess what (_ ** _guess what **)**_

****

**_It's gonna be ME_ **

Dean handed his mic to Cole, jumped off the stage and took off. Cole said into the mic, "So...  who's next?"

Cas watched as Dean walked out. He turned to Zar, "Outside. Now."

Zar leaned back in his chair, "No... I don't think so"

Cas stood up and leaned into Zar, "Get the fuck out of that chair Zar. Outside. NOW."

He turned around and walked outside. He was pacing by the time Zar sauntered out.

Cas whipped around on him, "What the fuck was that song about Zar?"

Zar leaned against the wall and lit a cigarette. "You might want to lower your voice, unless you want this conversation broadcasted tomorrow on the entertainment network."

Cas raised his eyebrows and didn’t lower his voice. "I don't give a fuck anymore Zar, I am tired of all of this!"

Zar blew out a smoke ring, "Now who is being dramatic darling?"

Gabe came out and Cas pointed at him, "Inside Gabe. NOW!"

Gabe put his hands up and walked back inside. Cas walked up to Zar and ripped the cigarette out of his hand and crushed it. He leaned in to Zar, hands on either side of his head. "Do you think this is a fucking joke Balthazar? Do I look entertained?"

Zar pushed him gently back with both his hands and stepped away from the wall. The rain was now hitting him full on, "Cassie. Baby. Just calm down, everything is fine."

Cas ran a hand through his hair, scattering droplets of water everywhere. "Everything is NOT fine Zar. What's the matter? Couldn't find anyone to fuck this week, so you decided to come down here and fuck with me?"

Zar laughed sarcastically, "Alright. You want to do this here. Fine. I came down here because I thought perhaps I was wrong. Perhaps I had indeed over-reacted about you dancing with that man and punching someone to defend him. But what do I find when I get here? You. Domestic as a fucking cat, cozied up with HIM. Tell me Castiel, just how long did you wait once you were in town before you started fucking him?"

Cas took a step closer to Zar, his fist bawled at his side. "I never cheated on you. Not once. Not even with Dean. You are the one who has the problem keeping his dick in his pants"

Zar sighed and threw his arm up in the air. "Alright! So I cheated. But do you know what I never did? LIE. I honestly loved you Cassie and when I fucked up, I told you. You on the other hand, Just how long exactly have you been in love with Dean Winchester?"

Cas stared at Zar, "What?"

"Dean. You know your husband. How long have you been in love with him? From the beginning? Was any single part of our relationship true? God! Can't you see Cassie! You don't belong here. You belong in New York City, with me, in our penthouse."

Cas shook his head, “No, you’re wrong"

Zar grabbed Cas by the arms, "You are bigger then this town! That man is going to drag you down with him, just like your father said."

Cas pushed Zar away from him, Zar stepped back his foot splashing in a puddle. "So my father put you up to this? I should have known."

Zar shook his head, "No, I called him. I was concerned about you and I missed you."

Cas laughed, "Oh, that’s rich. You leave me. Then you’re concerned."

Zar walked over and placed his hand against Cas' cheek. "Tell me don't love him Castiel. Tell me he doesn't matter."

Cas turned his head away from Zar's hand and looked at the ground. By now they were both soaked.

Zar let his hand drop. One of his band members came out. Zar said to him, "Uriel, tell everyone I'll meet them back in the city tonight." Uriel nodded and went inside.

Zar turned back to Cas, "Well, if you grow tired of this and change your mind; you know where to find me. For whatever reason, I can't, not love you."

He turned and got in his limo and drove away. Cas went inside and grabbed his guitar. He didn't bother with the umbrella. He said goodbye and good job to Meg and went back to the Deli. He tried Dean's bedroom but the door was locked. So he went into his room. He laid his guitar against the wall and stripped off his wet clothes. He didn't bother putting on anything else besides a pair of boxers. He flopped down on his bed and was out momentarily. He was physically and mentally exhausted. His last thought before drifting off was, _"Tomorrow will be better."_

**

Dean had woke up earlier than usual the next day. He fixed himself a cup of coffee, sat down on the couch and turned on the TV.

_“In an epic sing off, lead singer of Fallen Angels Balthazar and home town hottie Dean Winchester. They vocally battled for the love of one man. None other than Archangel Records producer Castiel Novak. who will he choose? I guess we wait and see…”_

Dean groaned and turned off the TV. News sure did travel fast. He stood up and walked over to the bar. Dean put down the signed divorce papers, turned around and walked out the door.


	15. I Won't Give Up On Us

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Title Inspiration - Jason Mraz - I Won't Give Up  
> Elton John ft Kiki Dee - Don't Go Breaking My Heart karaoke song

[I Won't Give Up - Jason Mraz - Chapter Title Inspiration](https://youtu.be/ZYqcpTYQ8I4?list=RDZYqcpTYQ8I4)

[Elton John ft Kiki Dee - Don't Go Breaking My Heart](https://youtu.be/Zh3MSalJwk0)

 

Cas woke up early Saturday morning. He hadn’t slept well last night. He had tossed and turned and reached out several times for Dean. Only to realize he was in bed alone. Damn Zar! Why the hell did he have to come here just to throw a wrench in everything? Cas sat up and pushed himself off the bed. He rubbed his eyes and ran a hand through his hair. He needed to talk to Dean. That much Cas was sure of. He walked over and grabbed the nearest shirt out of his closet. He pulled it on and found a pair of jeans in his dresser. He put those on and walked out into the living room. Dean wasn’t anywhere to be found. He walked into the kitchen. At least there was coffee. He poured himself a cup and turned around to the bar to grab the sugar and creamer. There sitting on the bar was divorce papers… signed. Cas picked them up and looked at them. He couldn’t believe it. He flew out of the apartment and down the stairs. The Deli wasn’t opened yet but, he knew Dean would be there.

“What the fuck is this,” Cas asked when he finally laid eyes on Dean.

  
Dean leaned against the counter. “They’re divorce papers Cas.”

  
“I won’t sign them Dean.” Cas ran a hand through his hair.

  
“You don’t have to. In your haste to divorce me you signed the copies before you got here. I faxed them already.”

  
“Why would you do that? I'm fucking in love with you, Dean.” Cas said moving around like a maniac.

  
“Well, prove it Cas.” Dean turned his back, hiding his smile and tried to finish opening for the day.

  
Cas walked over, grabbed Dean’s arm and spun him around. “Prove it? I’m here aren’t I?” Cas dropped his hand from Dean.

  
“That’s not good enough Cas. I’m not letting you fall back on the fact we are already married.” Dean crossed his arms over his chest.

  
“Dean…”

  
“No, Cas if you want to be with me you need to show me. If you want to marry me, prove it. I love you. I want you here. But, I’m not holding you back anymore. So if you want to go and live your fucked up life with Zar, then go. I’ll be damned if I keep you from what you really wanted.”

  
Cas rubbed his temples. “Damn it, Dean.” Cas looked up into Dean’s eyes. “I’m not leaving. I’m not giving up on us.”

  
“That’s up to you Cas. The deal is you stay and we face this media and whatever together or you back down and kiss the paparazzi’s ass and you do it alone.” Dean said and then turned around ending the conversation and finished the preparations to open.

  
Cas turned him back around and kissed him, "I'm not going anywhere." Then leaving Dean stunned he went upstairs to get finish getting dressed for the day.

  
***

The next couple days were tense. Cas was still angry about Dean's decision and Dean was holding his breath to see if Cas would really stay. The media was in a frenzy, posting pictures and video clips of Zar's time in their town. Pictures of Zar kissing Cas were put side by side with Dean and Cas working together in the Deli. There were close up's of how Cas looked at Dean. The fight with Zar, before he left, was broadcast all wrong, making it appear as if Cas was fighting with him to stay. Sad music played as Cas stood in the rain and Zar's limo drove away. Cas and Dean both stopped watching the news. Cas went back to sleeping in his own bed. He knew he was being stubborn, but he just couldn't believe Dean had so little faith in him. His anger quickly turned to loneliness. On the third night of sleeping in his own bed, He had had enough. He crept into Dean's room. Dean woke up and mumbled, "What's wrong?"

  
Cas got in bed with him and curled up close, "I miss you," he whispered.

Dean wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close. Cas was finally able to breathe and he fell asleep.

  
***

On Thursday Dean left. He went to the hospital and sang to the kids. He went to the fire station and helped with the rummage sale organization. Cas spent most of the day at Charlie's on the phone with his partners and with Meg's agent Crowley. Crowley was pissed he hadn't been consulted about Meg's first appearance.

  
He was nearly shouting, "Do I look like this is my first dance Castiel? You do not take my client and toss her into the limelight at a glorified karaoke bar without me even BEING THERE."

  
Cas rubbed his temple, "Look, Crowley. It was a last minute decision. Putting her up on stage with Zar was a good call. He is huge. People love him. She will get notoriety."

  
Crowley practically growled, "No. She will get second billing. My job is to make her big. Make her be a household name. I want Meg De'Vil to be screamed from the lips of preteen boy’s and girl's to start trying to dress like her and want to BE her. That is my job Castiel. Your job is to ensure that she is properly handled. This is a nightmare! Between your little love triangle and her second billing, I'm going to have to book her for some big gigs soon. Just so, she doesn't fizzle out before she ever got the chance to burn."

  
Cas sighed, "What did you have in mind?"

  
The argument continued. Cas agreed he would talk to Meg and have her take a trip into the city to sit down with Crowley and go over her appearance schedule. Crowley, finally satisfied hung up on Cas. Cas slumped back on Charlie’s couch and drank down the rest of the whiskey he had poured in his glass.

  
Charlie came in and leaned against the door jam, "Wanna talk about it?"

  
Cas massaged the bridge of his nose, "It’s just work Charlie. Just bullshit work."

  
Charlie came in and sat next to him curling her legs underneath her on the couch. "Its bullshit alright. What's wrong Cas?"

  
Cas dropped his head back on the couch and sighed, "Dean divorced me."

  
Charlie sat up straighter, "He did what?!?"

  
"He says if I want to marry him, I have to prove it. He says I'm not allowed to fall back on the fact we are already married. I think he thinks I felt trapped or something. I'm not going anywhere, but it’s making me crazy."

  
Charlie hugged him, "Oh. I see. Dean's pretty smart."

  
Cas looked affronted, "What? Whose side are you on?"

  
Charlie smiled, "Cas. He wants you to fight for him, like he did for you."

  
"I AM fighting Charlie. All we do is fight."

  
Charlie rolled her eyes, "Not fight WITH him, silly. Fight FOR him. Show him he is worth it. Prove you love him enough to stick around and marry him properly."

  
"How do I do that?"

  
She patted his leg, "You'll think of something."

  
***

On Friday Dean was in back doing inventory and Cas was out front with Cole. They had just closed up for lunch. Cole was leaning against the counter drinking a large cup of Hawaiian punch and Cas had a coffee. He hadn't been sleeping well so he needed the caffeine.

  
Cole said, "So, what are you doing to prove you want him?"

  
Cas shrugged, "What else can I do? I just plan to stay here and go along like we have been. Hopefully he will get the point that I'm staying."

  
Cole nodded, taking the lid off his drink to sip it, "No… I don't think that's gonna work"

Without warning he threw his whole cup of punch over Cas' clothes. Cas gasped from the cold. Cole smiled, "Oh. Damn that's gonna stain."

  
He yanked off Cas' shirt.

  
"You know what your pants too." He pulled off Cas' pants much to his protests

  
"I'm just gonna throw these in your washer, oh you might wanna put this on before Dean comes out." Cole tossed an apron at Cas and ran up stairs.

  
Cas quickly put on the apron but was standing there in just his boxer briefs.

  
Dean came out from the back and stopped dead. His mouth dropped open. There Cas was, in all his beautiful glory. He was wearing virtually nothing but an apron. His ass perfectly sculpted by the thin pair of boxers and his body on display. Dean's mouth dropped open and he suddenly had to adjust his pants.

  
Cas turned and looked at him. His face was a mixture of embarrassment and shock. He blurted out, "Cole did it!"

  
Dean started laughing, "Uh... Cas, you know Cole is straight right?"

  
Cas smoothed down the apron, regaining some of his composure. "Not like that Dean. He 'accidentally' spilled his drink on me. So he took my clothes to wash them."

  
Dean laughed again. "That son of a bitch," he shook his head. "He is smart. He is also clearly on your side."

  
Cas was flustered, "I don't know what you’re talking about."

  
He turned around grabbing a towel he leaned down to clean up the rest of the drink spill and saw Dean's pupils dilate and he leaned against the counter. Cas finally picked up on Cole's plan. He stretched his body. Then thrusting his ass up in the air he cleaned up the spill. Dean's breathing quickened. Cas stood up. He walked over and leaned against Dean's body. "Sorry, I need to put this rag in the sink," he said into Dean's ear.

  
He dropped the rag behind Dean into the sink. He stepped away and Dean grabbed him. He pulled him by his arm into the backroom and pushed him up against the shelves. Dean's hands went into Cas' hair and his lips crushed down on Cas' mouth. Cas moaned. His arm's came around Dean and he pulled him close. Dean's knee slid between Cas' legs and his thigh shifted rubbing against Cas' groin. Cas wrapped one leg around Dean and Dean grabbed it holding it in place. His tongue assaulting Cas' the whole time. He broke the kiss and kissed down Cas' jaw line. Cas' head was thrown back and he was gasping for air. Dean growled, "I want you Cas."

  
Cas pulled Dean's head up to look at him. He panted, "I thought you'd never ask."

  
He shimmied down from where he was and pulled Dean behind him. As they got to the front Cole was coming back down stairs a smug grin on his face. Cas said, "Watch the store," and yanked Dean upstairs.

  
Cole laughed, "I'm on it."

  
***

Dean was in a frenzy by the time they reached the top of the stairs. He yanked off Cas' apron and kicked off his shoes. He wrapped his arms around Cas and walked him backwards through the apartment. He broke away long enough to toss off his shirt. Then opened his bedroom door and pushed Cas inside. He kicked the door closed and took off his pants and boxers. He yanked Cas' boxers off. Dean grabbed him and lifted him up. Cas wrapped his legs around Dean. Dean dropped them both onto his bed. His kisses were hurried and bruising and Cas was in heaven. Dean backed up leaving Cas' legs spread wide, him standing between them. He grabbed the lube and dropped to his knees. He slid his mouth over Cas cock and moaned at the familiar taste. Cas shifted his hips up and moaned out Dean's name. Dean lubed up his hand and slid a finger inside Cas. He sucked Cas cock with vigor. His mouth moving up and down as his finger fucked Cas' tight ass. Cas was panting. Dean slid a second finger in and sucked on the head of Cas' cock.

  
Cas was panting out, "Oh fuck...oh...fuck...Dean."

  
Dean stretched his finger's scissoring them inside Cas and slid a third finger in. Cas gasped and then started moving his hips faster. He fucked himself on Dean's fingers while he fucked Dean's mouth. Dean pulled back and stood up. He worked the lube over his cock. He then squirted some directly in Cas' ass. Cas inhaled sharply at the cold sensation of the lube. Dean grabbed Cas' legs and yanked him to the edge of the bed. He wrapped Cas' knees around his arms and slid his cock in to Cas' ass.

  
Cas cried out, "Dean! Oh god... fuck me."

  
Cas' ass swallowed up Dean's cock. Dean pulled Cas against him. Cas' body was angled so he could see Dean perfectly as Dean fucked him. Dean's thrusts were hard and deep. He chanted, "Cas… Cas… Cas…"

  
Cas was losing his mind. The angle of Dean's cock was hitting his prostate over and over again. "Oh yes Dean! Fuck my ass baby! Fuck me hard! Jesus Christ!"

  
Cas' talk spurred Dean on and his motion's became quicker. He pounded into Cas' tight asshole. He growled out, "Mine. You’re fucking mine Cas."

  
Cas head was thrown back. His eyes shut tight. He panted out, "Yes. Of course I am Dean. Fuck!"

  
Cas' was right on the edge. He grabbed his cock and worked it rapidly, building up friction with every thrust from Dean bringing him closer. He cried out, "Dean!! Oh god… Dean!! Shooting hot come up and over his stomach and chest.

  
Dean slammed into him and came holding his legs in place while he filled him up deep inside. His body shook. He shuddered out, "C... Cas… mine."

  
Cas' eyes were closed, his breathing starting to regulate. Dean laid him back flat on the bed and dropped his body on top of him. Cas ran his hands through Dean's hair, "Yes. Winchester, I'm all yours," he whispered.

  
***

  
They eventually got up and got in the shower. They didn't speak much, both of them thinking. Cas figured it out. His new plan of action was to tease Dean to distraction and make love to him so often that Dean would never let him go. Dean was thinking about what Cas had said,  _"I'm all yours."_  Dean smiled and pulled Cas into a kiss under the hot spray of water. Dean knew they had a long way to go but he felt, for the first time, that maybe Cas really would stay.

  
***

  
That night they went to karaoke and Cas talked Dean into doing a duet with him. Dean didn't know what song it was so he waited to see what Cas had picked. The music started and Dean laughed. He started the song. Cas came in on every other line.

  
**_Don't go breaking my heart_**  
_I couldn't if I tried_  
**_Honey if I get restless_**  
_Baby you're not that kind_

 ** _Don't go breaking my heart_**  
_You take the weight off me_  
**_Honey when you knock on my door_**  
_I gave you my key_

 ** _Nobody knows it_** (they both sang)  
**_When I was down_**  
_I was your clown_  
**_Nobody knows it_** (they both sang)  
**_Right from the start_**  
_I gave you my heart_  
**_Oh, oh I gave you my heart_**

 ** _So don't go breaking my heart_**  
_I won't go breaking your heart_  
**_Don't go breaking my heart_**

 ** _And nobody told us_**  
**_`_** _Cause nobody showed us_  
**_And now it's up to us babe_**  
_I think we can make it_

 ** _So don't misunderstand me_**  
_You put the light in my life_  
**_You put the sparks to the flame_**  
_I've got your heart in my sights_

 ** _Nobody knows it_** **(they both sang)**  
**_When I was down_**  
_I was your clown_  
**_Nobody knows it_** (they both sang)  
**_Right from the start_**  
_I gave you my heart_  
**_Oh, oh I gave you my heart_**

 ** _So don't go breaking my heart_**  
_I won't go breaking your heart_

They sang the end together

  
**_Don't go breaking my_**  
**_Don't go breaking my_**  
**_Don't go breaking my heart._**

When the song ended Dean laughed and Cas kissed him. Their friend's cheered. It was a good night. Cas hoped he could make more good nights like this. Enough to get his husband back as his husband.

  
While at karaoke Cas talked to Meg about Crowley. Meg was excited. It turned out she loved being in front of a crowd of screaming people. Cas gave her the company credit card and told her she needed to go with Crowley and get herself a new wardrobe.

  
Cas held the card away from her for a minute, "Now listen. You only have a $5,000 limit. So be aware of that when you’re shopping okay?"

  
Meg's eyes went wide and she nearly fell out of her chair. "Only? Are you joking right now Cas?"

  
Cas shook his head, "No I'm not. The clothes and shoe's you need to get will be expensive Meg. You will be surprised how fast those 5 G's go. This is it baby. You are being thrown into this world, head first."

  
He handed her the card and she put it in her wallet quickly she grinned, "I'm ready! Throw me overboard Cas."

  
Cas pursed his lips, "A word of caution Meg. Don't sell them your soul. Once you do... you will never get it back. You stick to your guns. If something feel's wrong to you, you call me. I won't let them push you into anything you don't want to do. Got it?"

  
Meg nodded, "Okay. I got it. Thank you Castiel." Then she hugged him.

  
Dean watched the whole transaction between Cas and Meg. He thought maybe Cas' job wasn't just being a media whore. He would have to see how he handled Meg though. To find out if Cas was capable of not being a giant bag of dicks every time he was working.

  
***

  
They went home later and Cas crawled in bed with Dean. Dean pulled him to sleep on his chest. Cas snuggled closer and whispered, "I love you."

  
Dean smiled and kissed the top of Cas' head, "I love you too Novak. Now sleep."

  
Cas smiled and fell asleep.


	16. Between The Raindrops

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song Title : Lifehouse - Between the raindrops

The beginning of October brought with it an icy chill to the air. Over the last few weeks, Cas had determined that he would show Dean he was more than just an asshole producer who liked to fuck him. He wanted to prove to Dean that he truly loved him, above all else. He continued to work closely with Dean during the days in the Deli. He made sure Gabe and Michael had the house number so they could call and at least leave him a message without having to rely on Cas' cell phone being in a place with reception. He still used Charlie's computer and fax machine, but she didn't mind as it gave her a chance to spend time with Cas.

Cas called Sam and talked to him about coming in as the legal counsel for Archangel. Sam agreed since he had always been a music lover and minored in entertainment law when he went to Yale. He was also excited about the perks of backstage passes to any and all Archangel Record's performers. Sam assured him he would take good care of his company and said his first order of business would be to slap a gag order on Zar so he couldn't talk to the press about any part of their relationship without it going through Sam first. Cas was grateful to Sam and he told him so.

When it came to his and Dean's relationship, it was getting better. There were still a lot of bumps in the road, but no one's relationship is perfect. From the very beginning with Cas and Dean, their relationship hadn't been conventional. So, okay, Cas had to woo his ex-husband to prove to him he wanted to marry him again. Cas thought it was worth it. How many people ever get a second chance to be with their first love? Cas knew he had just one chance left with Dean to make up for ten years of miscommunication and distance. He had an idea how he was going to start.

The first thing he realized they needed was a date night. After the fiasco in the city, Cas decided to start small. Dean got called out to help with a small fire out at the Miller house. Apparently old man miller had been sneaking into his wood shed to smoke so his wife wouldn't find out. He accidently dropped his cigarette and started a small fire in his shed. Luckily no one was hurt. While Dean was away Cas made pizza dough from scratch and sealed it in a zip lock bag and hid it in the vegetable drawer in the fridge. When Dean got home he was exhausted and grimy. Cas pulled him into the bathroom and helped him out of his clothes. He helped Dean scrub his back and wash all the soot out of his hair. Dean was too worn out to have sex that night, but they cuddled and kissed for a while before Dean finally pulled Cas near and tucked him against his body.

The next day Dean sent Cole and Cas to go pick up some more supplies. With the cold coming in, more people were ordering the hot sandwiches and Dean hadn't properly ordered for the influx. While they were out Cas talked to Cole.

"So, I was thinking about doing a date night with Dean tonight."

Cole lifted a box and set it in his truck. "Oh, yea? Where were you thinking of going?"

Cas adjusted the crate and took the next one Cole handed him. "I wasn't. I was thinking of making my homemade pizzas and just picking up Dean's favorite beer."

Cole nodded as he lifted a sack of frozen French fries and tossed it in the truck. "That seems like a good idea. Dean always struck me as a pizza and beer sort of guy."

"That's what I thought too," Cas replied as he put the last of the boxes of coffee and creamer in the truck.

On the drive back Cole said, "You oughtta take advantage of that fire pit he has on the roof. With this weather, if you grabbed a blanket and set up a cot, you could be right toasty up there. Might help y'all get closer again."

Cas patted Coles' shoulder. "That sounds like a really good idea actually. Can we stop in at the lumber store real quick so I can grab some wood for the fire?"

So Cole stopped in and Cas got the wood. Then Cole detracted Dean so Cas could sneak the wood in without Dean noticing. He told Dean he would cover dinner that evening since Dean went to sing to little Johnny at the hospital. He hadn't been doing so well, so he couldn't leave his bed to go to the play room. Dean volunteered to sing to just him to cheer him up.

Cas closed up the Deli and went upstairs. He had about two hours to get everything ready before Dean got home. He took the dough out of the fridge and set it in a bowl to sit for an hour and come to room temperature. He went up on the roof and set up the logs in the fire pit. He pulled out the cot from the storage shed and set that up with a couple pillows and a blanket. Cas then headed out to the store to get the rest of the ingredients he needed and pick up Dean's favorite beer.

When he got back he rolled out the pizza's and added his special marinara sauce three kinds of cheese, pepperoni, sausage, black olives and green peppers. He brushed some melted garlic butter on the crust's and put the pizza's in the oven.

He had pulled a round card table out of the storage shed which would work perfectly for eating a meal on, as opposed to the bar in the kitchen where they normally ate. He draped the red checked tablecloth he had purchased at the store over the top. He laid down actual cloth napkins and forks and the nice plates Dean had in the cupboard but never used. He took the beers and put them in a bucket with ice on the counter. Once he was done he quickly threw together a chef salad with lettuce, olives, tomatoes, a couple hard boiled eggs and some grated cheese.

Cas realized something was missing...oh! Candles. He ran to the hall closet and found some white tiered candles. He just needed something that would work for holders. He noticed a couple of the beer bottles were green glass. Cas rinsed those out and stuck the tears in them and lit them. _"Perfect,"_ he thought. If anyone had dared to say Cas was a romantic to his face Cas probably would punch them in the throat, but Dean was worth the effort. Cas would do anything, for Dean.

Cas took the pizzas out of the oven and laid one on a large platter. He cut that one and slid a serving spatula under it and set it on the table between the two plates. He cut the other pizza and left it on the cookie sheet in the oven to stay warm. He shut off the oven and was just noticing how the wax from the candles had transformed the beer bottles into pretty cool holders when Dean came in. His smile lit up the room. "What's all this Cas?"

Cas was nervous, hoping Dean would like it. "I was hoping you would join me for a dinner date and then a fire on the rooftop?"

Dean's thousand watt smile was all the confirmation Cas needed. He felt a swell of pride that he was able to make Dean smile like that. God knows he had made him cry enough for one life time. Dean walked over and kissed Cas. He pulled out the seat for him and Cas sat down. Dean grabbed two beers from the ice bucket and muttered teasingly, "ooh fancy."

Cas laughed. Dean commented on how delicious the food was and how nice it was to not have to cook. They talked about little Jonny and Dean said he was doing better. Cas updated Dean on Meg's progress, that she had done a few shows and the public seemed to love her. After dinner, Dean offered to clean up. Cas took the time to go on the roof and set the fire going in the pit. Dean came out and he looked around. Cas flipped a switch and the roof lit up with small white Christmas lights. Dean wrapped an arm around Cas and whispered in his ear. "You realize, this makes you as hopeless a romantic as I am?"

Cas kissed Dean's neck and whispered, "You're worth it"

They curled up in the blanket, Cas lying back against Dean just watching the stars. The only light came from the tiny lights and the fire that was crackling and popping pleasantly. The air was cold but Cas and Dean were warm and cozy snuggled together in front of the fire. The fire started to die down and it started getting colder so they decided to head back in. As they got up Cas' cell phone chirped signifying he had missed a call at some point. He had one message:

 ** _Hi Mr. Novak, My name is Andrea Giovanni. I'm Tony's sister. He said to give you a call to discuss an audition. Please call me back at your earliest convenience. Thanks in advance for your consideration._** She left her number.

Dean asked who had left the message. Cas hated the way his eye's pinched at the corners as if bracing for it to be Zar.

“You remember Tony, from the club," Cas asked him.

Dean nodded. "Yea the bouncer right?"

"Yeah. That was his baby sister Andrea. I need to give her a call tomorrow and have her come down so I can hear her sing."

Dean raised his eyebrow, "You actually meant what you said to Tony?"

"Uh yes, of course Dean. Tony had our back at that club. I promised I would give his sister a listen. I don't break promises."

Dean kissed him, "That's actually pretty cool of you Cas."

Cas smiled, "Glad you approve. I thought you hated everything about my job?"

Dean poured sand into the fire pit to make sure it stayed out. "Not everything, just most of it," he joked.

Cas chuckled he grabbed up the blanket and Dean grabbed the pillows and they brought them inside.

Cas had planned for them to watch a movie after sitting outside but Dean had other plans. Once the door to the outside was shut Dean pulled Cas into a languid kiss. He kissed his jaw and down his neck. "Thank you babe. I enjoyed our date."

Cas tilted his head back to give Dean better access. "I'm glad. I do love you Dean."

Dean slid his hands up Cas' shirt and pulled it over his head. He smiled, "I'm starting to truly believe that Cas."

He kissed Cas walking them to the bed. Dean slid off Cas' pajama pants. He stood back and removed his t-shirt and pants as well. Dean got in bed and pulled Cas on top of him. He ran his hand through Cas' hair. He cupped Cas’ cheek and looked into his eyes. "Make love to me Cas," he whispered.

Cas took a deep breath. He cupped Dean's face with his hands and kissed him. Dean opened his mouth to allow Cas better access. They kissed passionately, neither fighting for dominance. Cas took out the bottle of lube and got Dean ready while he continued to kiss him all over. His lips, his neck, his chest. Dean's hips moved with Cas' fingers. He breathed out a small moan "Cas."

Cas' body was buzzing by the time Dean was ready. He separated Dean's legs and slid between them. Dean's body was so relaxed and willing Cas easily slid inside him. Dean arched his back. He let out another moan and gripped Cas' upper arms. Cas moved slowly building up momentum. He looked into Dean's eyes. He loved watching the moment when Dean's pleasure got to the point that he couldn't keep his eyes open any more. Cas rotated his hip's hitting Dean's prostate occasionally and causing Dean to gasp. Cas looked down at Dean. His Dean. This was what he had always wanted. To be wherever Dean was, making love to him. No one was taking that from him again. As Dean's orgasm approached Cas sped up. He wrapped his hand around Dean's erection and worked him while he pumped himself in and out of Dean. Dean's breathing increased he chanted Cas' name. Cas whispered, "Yes Dean. Let go. Ride that wave baby. Take me with you."

As Dean came his ass tightened around Cas' cock milking an orgasm out of him. Cas tossed his head back and rode through his orgasm. His body was shaking he shouted, "Dean... my god...I love you!"

Cas was still shaking when he pulled out. Dean wiped the front of himself off and pulled Cas onto his chest. Cas wrapped shaking arms around Dean. Dean kissed his head, "I love you too Cas, always."

Cas was so shocked he actually had tears in his eyes. He lay on Dean's chest hearing Dean's heart thump underneath him. That's where he wanted to be, as close to Dean's heart as possible.

***

The following Thursday Cas had woken up earlier than usual. He called Andrea back and set up a meeting with her at their studio. Cas had a surprise for Dean so he knew he would be in the city that day. He told Dean to dress warmly and Cas convinced Dean to allow him to drive his Baby to a small diner for breakfast and coffee. This was a very nice change since normally they ate down in the deli since it was convenient. From there they drove into the city. Cas wanted to show Dean that ‘City Cas’ as Dean called him, wasn't all bad. They went to Madame Tussaud’s wax museum first. Dean walked around the whole places taking one picture after the other.

Dean mentioned once when they were looking at a travel guide that he had always wanted to see the Cathedral of St. John the Divine. So they drove into Manhattan and saw it. Unfortunately it was closed for repairs after a large fire in 2001 but Dean was still in awe just looking at the outside. He said that was a true work of beauty. The next stop Cas was excited about. He had found out that it was the first week of the open season for the ice skating rink at Rockefeller Center. He rented ice skates for Dean and himself and they set out to try and skate. Dean was very wobbly. He looked at Cas who seemed pretty steady on his skates. "How are you able to stay up so easily?"

Cas laughed and took Dean's hands. He skated slowly backwards as Dean hobbled and slid trying to skate. Cas answered his question, "I wasn't working twenty-four seven, Dean. I did manage in the last ten years to do some fun things."

Dean was glad to hear it. Eventually he began to get the hang of the ice skates and he and Cas skated around for a while. It was cold but worth it. Dean's hand felt warm in Cas'. At one point Cas saw a flash go off from a camera. As the man angled for a better shot, Cas pulled Dean forward. Dean's arms went around his waist and they both toppled over laughing. Cas took Dean's face in his hands and kissed him. Screw the paparazzi. They returned the skates and after putting on their regular shoe's sat and drank hot cocoa with real whipped cream. Dean bumped his shoulder against Cas'. "Thanks Novak. This was an awesome surprise."

Cas grinned, "That's not the surprise Winchester. Come on, we have one more stop."

Cas sent Dean to warm up the car while he found a trash can for their hot chocolate cups. Once Dean had walked away Cas approached the man with the camera he leaned in keeping his voice low. "Listen buddy, take whatever pictures you want but stay out of my way. He doesn't need you guys crawling up his ass, you feel me?"

The man nodded and asked, "Who is he Mr. Novak?"

Cas smiled, "He's the most important person in my world, and you can quote me on that."

With that being said Cas hurried off. He got in the car and was grateful Dean had turned the heater on. He gave Dean directions to a parking garage. They got out and walked to his studio. A pretty brunette was waiting inside the lobby when they got there. She rushed up to him, "Mr. Novak hi, I'm Andrea. We spoke on the phone."

Cas smiled, "Yes I remember. I have a really busy day today, but I wanna hear you sing. Any chance you could drive into Poughkeepsie on Monday?"

Her eyes beamed, "Sure! No problem. Just tell me when and where."

Cas gave her the address to Love Bites and said he would meet her there at 5pm on Monday. She thanked him and as Cas was getting in the elevator she said, "Mr. Novak, My brother was right. You are good people."

Cas flashed her a grin, "Say hello to Tony for me."

The elevator doors closed and Dean smiled at him. Cas looked over at him. "What?"

Dean shook his head still smiling. "You old softy."

Cas bumped him. "Shut it Winchester."

Dean laughed.

As they entered the studio a brunette woman stood up quickly. "Mr. Novak. Hello. And you must be Dean, a pleasure."

"Dean this is my assistant Hannah. She makes sure I don't get in over my head with scheduling. She also makes a mean cup of coffee." He smiled at Hannah and Dean shook her hand.

"Hannah, are they here?"

Hannah smiled, "Yes sir. Everything is taken care of."

Cas kissed her cheek. "You're a life saver Hannah."

He pulled Dean along down a hallway with gold and platinum records hanging on the walls. They rounded a corner and you could hear music playing. Dean's eyes went wide, "That sounds like the Lonely Hunters."

Cas smiled, "It is. They came back early from the tour to record their new album. You wanna meet em?"

Dean looked like a five year old who just got told Santa was at Macy's. "Hell yes! No offense Cas but their drummer is HOT."

Cas laughed. "I'll try not to get jealous. Even I have to admit those Australian accent's are sexy.'

Cas brought Dean in and he got to meet them. When Steven, their drummer, winked at Dean, Dean could barely keep eye contact. They pulled out one of their CD's that hadn't even been released to the general public yet and they all signed it. Cas hugged all of them and wished them luck with their new album.

In the car Cas drove and Dean stared at his CD. He finally looked over to Cas. "Well, I'm impressed. We have been in the city all day and you haven't been a dick once. Good job ‘City Cas.’"

Cas shook his head. "I love you too Winchester," he said sarcastically.

They ate dinner that night Market Table where Cas enjoyed a steak medium rare while Dean opted for his to be well done.

By the time they headed back home they were both thoroughly tired. They wearily climbed the stairs and got undressed. Dean pulled Cas onto the bed and kissed him. "Thanks, for an awesome day, and for showing me the other half of you."

Cas pulled Dean into his arms and covered them up. "Thank you for giving me the chance."


	17. Baby It's Cold Outside

[Title song: Baby It's Cold Outside](https://youtu.be/hnH_RGyzbSU)

 

The following Monday brought in a cold front. The weather reported a storm might be brewing. Andrea couldn't care less. This was her shot, maybe her only shot at getting her song's heard. She didn't care so much about being a big star, she just wanted to be able to write her songs and sing them and have people hear them. Her brother Tony told her Castiel was tough but honest. If she was good, he would give her a chance. If he didn't think she was, he would tell her. She pulled into town at 4:30. She parked her little yellow VW bug in the back lot of the Love Bites bar. She was supposed to meet Mr. Novak at 5:00pm sharp, she would have time to have a drink to warm her bones and set up her keyboard. She pulled her keyboard out of the back seat and headed inside. The place was empty except for the very attractive bartender.

Andrea gave her best smile and walked up to the bar. "Excuse me. I'm Andrea Giovanni. I'm supposed to be auditioning with Mr. Novak today. Is it alright if I set up my keyboard on your stage.?"

  
Benny turned around to address the woman who was speaking to his back. He inhaled sharply. She was gorgeous. Long dark brunette hair and big round caramel colored eyes. Her skin was just a pigment shy of tanned. Benny just stared at her.

She cleared her throat and asked again. "So..Is it okay?"

Benny shook his head, "I'm sorry ma'am, is what okay?"

  
She smiled and her smile dazzled Benny. "Is it alright if I set up my keyboard on your stage?"

  
Benny nodded, "Oh. Sure thing, you go right ahead. I'm Benny by the way." Benny touched his hat in a salute

  
Andrea looked down shyly. "It's nice to meet you, I'm Andrea."

  
She went over to the stage to begin setting up. Benny watched her. He rolled her name around on his tongue _Andrea_ , He liked it.

  
***  
Cas and Dean were working tirelessly in the Deli. It seemed like everyone had decided that they would eat there for lunch and everyone wanted a grilled sandwich and fries. If Cas had to look at one more Ruben sandwich today he might scream. It didn't help that Cole was away visiting family for the week and Garth was sick. Finally 4:00 rolled around and they closed the shop to clean up for the day. Cas reminded Dean that he had an appointment at 5:00 to listen to Tony's baby sister.

  
At a quarter to 5:00 Dean looked out the window. "Uh..Cas. I don't think you're gonna be making that appointment today."

Cas came back downstairs after getting dressed. "Why do you say that? I still have 15 minutes."

  
Dean pointed out the window. It wasn't just snowing, It was a damn blizzard. The snow had already collected up onto the doorway effectively sealing off their exit. Cas sighed "Okay. Guess I'll call Benny and tell him to give the girl a message if she even made it down."

  
He picked up the phone and all he got was silence. "Damn! Phone's are down."

  
Just as he said that the whole place went dark. The backup generator whirred on sending power to the fridge and freezer, but everything else was dark.

Dean yelled out, "Oh come on! Good thing we have candle's upstairs."

  
He felt around in the dark and opened a drawer pulling out a flashlight. They made their way upstairs to look for candles.

  
***  
Benny had just poured Andrea a glass of Southern Comfort and decided he could do with a drink too when the light's went out. His backup generator kicked on giving just a low light, enough to barely see by. Benny leaned on the bar and shook his head. "Storm's taken out the power. Look's like you're stuck here tonight ma'am."

  
Andrea's eyes went wide, "What do you mean 'stuck'? I have an audition tonight."

  
Benny shook his head. "Not anymore you don't. Snowed in honey. Ain't no one gettin' in or out tonight."

  
She sighed dramatically. "Where am I supposed to sleep? I can't very well curl up on one of these chairs."

  
Benny nodded, "I have an apartment upstairs. You can have my bed. I'll take the couch."

  
Andrea couldn't see any other option, "Alright. That's very nice of you."

  
Benny shrugged, "My mama raised me right. I won't let a lady be stuck with no place to lay her head."

  
She drank down the rest of her drink then pointed to the glass, "Might as well hit me again. I won't be driving tonight."

  
Benny refilled her glass and poured himself one.

  
***  
Cas and Dean had gone upstairs and Dean lit the fireplace since the heat would be off as well with the black out. Cas was nervously pacing. Dean just chuckled, "Hey Novak. Chill out okay? It's just a power outage. Pretty standard around here. They will get it working again as soon as they can get someone in to clear out the snow. In the meantime, we stay warm."

Dean came up behind Cas and wrapped his arms around his waist kissing his neck. "We maybe can find ways to occupy our time."

  
Cas leaned his head back against Dean. "Mmmm. This blackout might not be so bad after all." He smiled and turned around to kiss Dean.

  
Dean pulled back quickly. "Shit! I gotta get the stuff from our fridge up here and stick it in the walk in downstairs so it doesn't go bad. While I do that why don't you grab that guitar of yours. You can sing me a song." He gave his thousand-watt grin and Cas agreed.

  
Cas went into his room and grabbed his case. The latch was loose and it came open. Cas exclaimed loudly as he caught his guitar. He picked it up and looked it over with the flashlight. Seemed to be fine, thank god. Then he noticed something had fallen out of the case. As he crouched down to look a soft smile played across his face. He picked up the purple velvet bag and set it gently in his drawer. He had a plan for that. Then he took his guitar out to the living room and got comfortable on the couch.

  
Dean came back up the stairs. "I am triumphant! Nothing will spoil. "

  
Cas shook his head and smiled, "Come on over here and sit down. I'll sing you a song. You might even know it." He winked at Dean.

  
Dean sat down on the couch facing Cas. Cas struck a few chords adjusting and tuning his guitar. Then he started to play and sing.

  
_**I'm gonna change my ways of doin' things around here** _  
_**Well, I'm turning over a new leaf, gonna get myself in gear** _  
_**'Cause I've got a man whos better then most,** _  
_**and I've made a mess of his plans** _  
_**Starting today, all I'm gonna be is your man** _

_**Cause I've been a wild catter, and a go-go getter** _  
_**Been an S.O.B. right down to the letter** _  
_**I've had misadventures, I've even got pictures** _  
_**I'm even more than I can stand** _  
_**But startin' today, all I'm gonna be is your man** _

_**I'm gonna give it all back, cause all I've done is take** _  
_**Well I've put him on the back burner while I was out on the make** _  
_**But I've got a man who's good enough to give me** _  
_**A second chance AGAIN** _  
_**And startin' today, all I'm gonna be is your man** _

_**Cause I've been a wild catter, and a go-go getter** _  
_**Been an S.O.B. right down to the letter** _  
_**I've had misadventures, I've even got pictures** _  
_**I'm even more than I can stand** _  
_**But startin' today, all I'm gonna be is your man** _

_**I'm a little bit late but I've wisened up** _  
_**Now I'm takin` you by the hand** _  
_**And startin' today, all I'm gonna be is your man** _

Dean got up and took the guitar out of Cas' hand and layed it against the coffee table. Then he surprised Cas by straddling him and scooting onto his lap. He kissed him slowly, running his hands through Cas' hair. He used his fake country accent, "Why Castiel Novak, you're becoming down right romantic these days."

  
Cas swatted his ass and chuckled, "Don't act like you don't love it."

  
Dean nipped his chin, "Oh I love it. I also love you."

  
Cas wrapped his arms around Dean and picked him up while kissing him. He walked them over and laid Dean down on the rug in front of the fireplace. He laid on top of Dean and whispered, "I love you too Dean Winchester."

  
He kissed down Dean's neck and pulled off his shirt. Cas took his own shirt off too. Dean shimmied back so he could remove the rest of his clothes while Cas did the same. Cas went and grabbed the big fluffy blanket off Dean's bed and the lube and came back out. He dropped the blanket down making a soft palet on the floor for Dean to lay on. Then he dropped to his knee's between and begin kissing Dean again, laying him back down on the palet.

  
***

Meanwhile over at Love Bites Andrea and Benny had moved to sit on the stage. It was more comfortable then trying to stay seated on a bar stool after a few glasses of southern comfort. Benny was reclining with his back resting against the stage, sitting on the floor. "So, what can you play on that thing?"

  
Andrea shrugged pushing down a couple keys on her keyboard. "Pretty much anything, as long as I've heard it before. I play by ear so, I don't need sheet music."

  
"Do you know, Midnight train to Georgia?"

  
Andrea smiled, " Gladys night and the Pipps? That's one of my favorite's."

  
Benny chuckled, "Mine too. Wanna sing it with me? We ain't got any other plans in the near future."

  
She smiled, "Sure."

She began the first notes of the song and shocked Benny with how clear and beautiful her voice rang out. Benny sang back-up for her.

 **_L.A. proved too much for the man_ **  
_(Too much for the man, he couldn't make it)_  
**_So he's leaving a life he's come to know, ooh_ **  
_(He said he's going)_  
**_He said he's going back to find_ **  
_(Going back to find)_  
**_Ooh, what's left of his world_ **  
**_The world he left behind not so long ago_ **

**_He's leaving_ **  
_(Leaving)_  
**_On that midnight train to Georgia, yeah_ **  
_(Leaving on the midnight train)_  
**_Said he's going back_ **  
_(Going back to find)_  
**_To a simpler place and time, oh yes he is_ **  
_(Whenever he takes that ride, guess who's gonna be right by his side)_  
**_I'll be with him_ **  
_(I know you will)_  
**_On that midnight train to Georgia_ **  
_(Leaving on a midnight train to Georgia, woo woo)_  
**_I'd rather live in his world_ **  
_(Live in his world)_  
**_Than live without him in mine_ **  
_(Her world is his, his and hers alone)_

 **_He kept dreaming_ **  
_(Dreaming)_  
**_Ooh, that some day he'd be a star_ **  
_(A superstar, but he didn't get far)_  
**_But he sure found out the hard way_ **  
**_That dreams don't always come true, oh no, uh uh_ **  
_(Dreams don't always come true, uh uh, no, uh uh)_  
**_So he pawned down his hopes_ **  
_(Woo, woo, woo-woo)_  
**_And even sold his old car_ **  
_(Woo, woo, woo-woo)_  
**_Bought a one way ticket back to the life he once knew_ **  
**_Oh yes he did, he said he would_ **

**_Oh-oh, he's leaving_ **  
_(Leaving)_  
**_On that midnight train to Georgia, yeah_ **  
_(Leaving on a midnight train)_  
**_Said he's going back to find, ooh_ **  
_(Going back to find)_  
**_A simpler place and time, ooh, yeah_ **  
_(Whenever he takes that ride, guess who's gonna be right by his side)_  
**_I'm gonna be with him_ **  
_(I know you will)_  
**_On that midnight train to Georgia_ **  
_(Leaving on a midnight train to Georgia, woo woo)_  
**_I'd rather live in his world_ **  
_(Live in his world)_  
**_Than live without him in mine_ **  
_(Her world is his, his and hers alone)_

 **_Ooh, he's leaving_ **  
_(Leaving)_  
**_On the midnight train to Georgia, yeah, ooh y'all_ **  
_(Leaving on the midnight train)_  
**_Said he's going back to find_ **  
_(Going back to find)_  
**_Ooh, a simpler place and time, ooh y'all, uh-huh_ **  
_(Whenever he takes that ride, guess who's gonna be right by his side)_

Benny had walked over and sat beside her to sing the end with her.

 _**I've got to be with him** _  
_(I know you will)_  
_**On that midnight train to Georgia** _  
_(Leaving on a midnight train to Georgia, woo woo)_  
_**I'd rather live in his world** _  
_(Live in his world)_  
_**Than live without him in mine** _  
_(Her world is his, his and hers alone)_

Andrea stopped playing and looked over at Benny. Then she leaned in and kissed him. Benny's arms wrapped around her and kissed her back. Then he quickly stood up and cleared his throat. "Uh. I'm sorry ma'am. I shouldn't have encouraged that. We've both been drinkin' and as I said earlier, my mama raised me better then that."

  
***  
Cas had moved down and taken Dean in his mouth while he was working him opened with his finger's. What Dean didn't know was Cas was feeling adventurous. He also was in need of Dean being inside him. When he had gone to get the blanket and lube he also had brought out a medium size vibrator. Dean heard the buzzing sound a second before Cas inserted it into Dean. Dean's mouth dropped open. "Oh! Cas... what are you up to?" He panted out.

  
Cas straddled Dean and kissed him. He growled. "I want you inside me."

  
Dean was already shifting his hips due to the vibrator. "Mmmm... Yes... Ride me baby."

  
Cas had been working his own ass while he was getting Dean ready. He slid lube over Dean's hard cock and smeared the rest over his hole. He positioned himself over Dean and slid Dean's cock inside. He hadn't worked himself quite open enough so the burn was slightly more than he was used to, "Oh..fuck.."

He gave himself a minute to adjust then his body took over pulling Dean's cock further into him as he slid down to sit entirely on his hard cock.

  
Dean's breath stuttered out. Cas laid one hand behind him to work the vibrator in and out of Dean as he shifted his hips to fuck Dean's cock. Dean's hips were pumping and he had his finger's digging into Cas' thighs. "Oh..Cas...Jesus... Oh my god...Oh..my..god."

  
Cas increased speed. Plunging Dean inside him and fucking him with the vibrator. "Yes... Dean... You like being fucked and fucking me at the same time? I love your hard cock in my ass Dean... Fuck... you feel so good"

  
Dean was biting his lip and sweat was already forming on his brow. "Cas... you...so tight...not gonna last."

  
Cas was getting close. He rotated the vibrator in Dean's ass while he rode him hard. His ass and balls slapping against Dean's body as he worked the vibrator furiously to fuck Dean and hit his prostate. Dean lurched, he grabbed Cas by the hips and pumped his load into him. He let out a gurgled growl. Cas tossed his head back from the sensation. Before he could come Dean yanked him off and up to his mouth. Still holding his hips Dean slid his mouth over Cas' cock. Cas jerked and fell forward catching himself above Dean's face. He came hard right down Dean's throat. He cried out, "Oh Jesus Christ Dean!..."

  
Dean worked Cas' hips, fucking him into his mouth as he sucked and swallowed down all traces of Cas' come. He made a "Mmmm" sound and released Cas' hips.

Cas slid down to lay on top of Dean. He was panting and trying to catch his breath. He slid his hand down shutting off the vibrator and sliding it out of Dean's ass causing Dean to hiss. He dropped it to the side to clean later. Cas lay his head on Dean's chest and murmured, "You are such a dirty boy."

  
Dean chuckled wrapping his arms around Cas, "Don't act like you don't love it."

  
Just then the power came back on. They both laughed and got up to shower.

  
***  
Andrea looked up at Benny. Then put her head in her hand's. "Just my luck. An honest to goodness gentleman."

  
Benny put his hand's in his pocket, "You say that like it's a bad thing."

  
Andrea shrugged, "Its not, normally. But..."

  
Benny shook his head, "ma'am..."

  
Andrea cut him off and stood up. The world tilted a little she leaned her hand on Benny's chest. He grabbed her around the waist to steady her. She looked into his beautiful eyes. "Please don't call me ma'am. My name is Andrea."

  
Benny inclined his head, "Beggin' your pardon, Andrea. I think we should get you to bed."

  
She nodded and slightly slurred, "You might be onto something gentleMAN."

  
She tried walking and stumbled. Benny swept her up in his arm's cradling her against his chest. "Sorry to be so forward Andrea, but I have a feelin' you aren't in any condition to make it up these stairs"

  
Just then the power came back on. Benny was grateful he didn't have to try and climb the stairs holding Andrea in the dark.

  
Andrea laid her head against Benny's chest. She murmured, "Anyone ever tell you, you smell like the ocean after a rain storm?"

  
Benny smiled to himself, "Can't say they have, but I'll take the compliment."

  
He got her upstairs and set her down in his room. He was rummaging in his drawer for something for her to wear. He didn't see her take off her jeans, sweater and bra. Benny turned around and immediately slammed his eyelid's closed. He grabbed a random shirt from his drawer and extended his hand out to her. "Here, put this on."

  
She giggled, "Benny wenny gentlemanny. I'm not totally naked. I have panties on."

  
Benny kept his eyes closed and pretended he hadn't seen way too much of her tanned, naked body. He certainly hadn't noticed the swell of her breast's or the dip in her waist that accentuated her curves. _Nope didn't see anything_ , he told himself. She finally grabbed the shirt he had been holding out. He heard a rustling of fabric and then she said, "Okay. I'm decent. You can open your eyes now."

  
Benny opened one eye to be sure and then opened both and laughed. The shirt he had given her was his old jersey. Not only was it down to her knee's but she had it on backwards. He approached her and told her to pull her arms out of the sleeves. Benny shifted it so it was forward and she stuck her arms back through the holes. At maybe 5' 3" she looked adorable in his over sized shirt. He just wished she didn't also look sexy as all hell. She got into the bed and Benny got her two Asprin and a glass of water. She would probably need it when she woke up. He went in his bathroom and changed into a pair of pajama pants and padded out to the living room.

  
***  
Cas and Dean crawled into Cas bed exhausted. They had showered and then finally got around to watching _Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom_. It was one of Dean's favorites. He said there was something sexy about the way Indy handled that whip. Cas had fallen asleep against his chest. Dean teased him asking if he was ever going to make it through a whole movie without falling asleep.

Cas snuggled up to Dean. His arm over Dean's waist, head on his chest. They said I love you and goodnight. Then Cas mumbled what he had started saying every night to reassure Dean. He kissed his chest and said, "I'm not going anywhere, ever again."

  
Dean kissed his head and replied the same way he always did, "Okay Cas."

  
***  
Andrea had started to sober up and she could hear Benny tossing and turning trying to get comfortable on the couch. She looked at the large king sized four poster bed and sighed. She got up and went to the doorway. "Hey mister."

  
Benny sat up, "Is everything alright?"

  
She shook her head "Look, my mama raised me right too. You don't need to sleep out there. There is a large bed in here that can easily fit both of us."

  
Benny looked leery, "I don't know..."

  
Andrea laughed, "Don't worry, I'll respect your virtue."

  
She turned around and walked back in his room shouting over her shoulder. "Don't be a stubborn an ass Benny."

  
Benny sighed and went into the room. Once he had climbed into bed Andrea rolled over and draped her arm across his chest. Benny shifted his arm and she curled up into him laying her head on his chest. Benny finally relaxed his arm and let it drape across her back. He laid, staring at the ceiling, not daring to fall asleep till he heard her soft breathing that told him she was asleep. In the dark room, in the dead of night, Benny could admit to himself that this felt nice. He hadn't paid attention enough to realize... He was lonely. He sighed and closed his eyes. He allowed himself to pull her just a little closer as he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cas sings: Her Man by Gary Allen  
> Andrea and Benny sang : Midnight train to Georgia by Glady's night and the pipps.


	18. In Your Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Title Inspiration:  
> In Your Eyes - Peter Gabriel  
> Song Andrea sings is:  
> Let Me Fall - Idina Menzel

[Chapter Title: In Your Eyes - Peter Gabriel](https://youtu.be/2v5d3WHVQFY)

[Let Me Fall - Indina Menzel ](https://youtu.be/6gHwHIHPs3U)

 

The next morning Benny woke up feeling better than he had in years. It was nice to have a beautiful lady to share his bed with. Even if he wouldn’t say it out loud he was already smitten with Miss Andrea. He rolled himself out of bed and walked over to the window. Everything was still covered in white. Looks like Andrea might be staying a couple more days. Good thing he stocked up on groceries a couple days ago.

One last look at Andrea in his bed over his shoulder and he made his way out to the small kitchen. He pulled open the fridge surveying the contents. Benny wasn’t sure what Andrea liked for breakfast but, who could refuse French toast? So he pulled out everything needed. He went into the living room and put on some soft music. The volume low so it didn’t wake up Andrea. Then he went back in the kitchen and got to work.

Soon the air was filled with the smell of coffee, bacon, and French toast. Andrea walked in, still in Benny’s shirt and sat down at the table watching as he finished up breakfast.

“Morning Benny,” Andrea greeted when Benny turned around with plates in his hand.

“Good morning ‘Drea,” Benny replied with a smile.

“‘Drea? No one has ever shortened my name before.”

“I’m sorry ma’am,” Benny said and placed the food down in front of her.

“On no need to apologize, Benny, I like the way it sounds rolling off your tongue.” Andrea looked over and smiled.

He smiled and nodded his head. “How do you take your coffee?”

Andrea hummed, “Cream and lots of it.”

Benny walked back in the kitchen and filled two big mugs full of coffee. He added the cream to Andrea’s and just sugar to his. Then he made his way back to the table and sat down. Andrea thanked Benny and they made light conversation while they ate.

***

Cas woke Dean up the following morning showering kisses on his face. They lay tangled up in each other for awhile before deciding they had to get up today even though there would be no business at the Deli. Dean made a quick breakfast and of course coffee to kick their brains in gear. After eating they bundled up to walk over to Love Bites.

“Cas grab a scarf out of the closet.” Dean leaned up against the doorjamb waiting.

“I’m not wearing a damn scarf, Dean,” Cas stated and shook his head.

Dean placed one hand on his hip mimicking the way he mother used to do to him when he wasn’t listening. “Yes, you are. No arguments. You’re not getting sick!”

Cas rolled his eyes and groaned but decided Dean wasn’t going to give up so he pulled one out and flung the offending cloth around his neck.

“There are you happy,” Cas asked.

Dean grinned. “Yes now quit acting like a five-year-old.”

Cas slapped Dean’s ass on the way out the door, “Better be glad I love you, Winchester!”

Dean grabbed Cas’ hand and walked downstairs and out through the door. The cold wind damn near knocked the breath out of them so they ran all the way over and swung open the door to Benny’s bar.

“Hey Benny,” Dean called out as he rounded the bar and made his way in the back room.

“Yea brotha I’ll be right down.”

“Did Andrea make it,” Cas asked from the bottom of the stairs.

He got his answer when he laid eyes on the woman walking down the stairs in front of Benny.

When Benny saw the look on Cas’ face he held his hands up and said, “I didn’t touch her. I offered her a place to stay when the storm hit.”

Cas shook his head and laughed. “I know man. Come on Andrea let me hear your pipes.”

Andrea giggled and followed Cas back out into the bar. She made her way up to the stage and sat down behind her keyboard. Cas, Dean, and Benny sat at a table closest to the stage.

“I’m going to play a song I wrote called ‘Let Me Fall’.” She started playing and followed by her vocals.

 

**It's October again**

**Leaves are falling down like rain**

**One more year's come and gone**

**But nothing's changed**

**Wasn't I supposed to be someone**

**Who could face the things that I've been running from?**

**Let me feel**

**I don't care if I break down**

**Let me fall**

**Even if I hit the ground**

**If I cry a little**

**And die a little**

**At least I know I lived**

**Just a little**

**Let me feel**

**Let me fall**

Cas sat back in the chair, closed his eyes and just listened to the music pour over the bar.

**I become much too good at being invincible**

**I'm an expert at 'play it safe' and 'keep it cool'**

**But I swear this is not who I'm meant to be**

**I refuse to let my life fall over me**

**Let me feel**

**I don't care if I break down**

**Let me fall**

**Even if I hit the ground**

**If I cry a little**

**And die a little**

**At least I know I lived**

**Just a little**

**Let me feel**

**Let me fall**

Cas finally opened his eyes and looked over at Dean who had a big smile on his face. Dean’s eyes met Cas’ and he mouthed, “This girl is good.” Cas only replied with a nod. Andrea was definitely what they needed at the label. He knew his partners would jump at the chance to sign her.

**Yes, I'm gonna be someone**

**If I take it as it comes**

**If I face the things that I've been running from**

**I've been running from**

**Let me feel**

**I don't care if I break down**

**Let me fall**

**Even if I hit the ground**

**If I cry a little**

**And die a little**

**At least I know I lived**

**Just a little**

**Let me feel**

**Let me fall**

**It's October again**

**The leaves are falling down like rain**

**Oh...**

When the music stopped Cas didn’t say anything for a minute. Quietly he stood up and walked over to the stage, offered his hand, and helped Andrea down. He positioned her in front of him and said, “I have honestly never heard raw talent like that in all my years in the industry. So I have one question for you.”

“What,” Andrea asked in a nervous but, curious tone.

“You ready to be a star baby girl?”

Andrea jumped up and hugged Cas tightly. Her squeal was damn near deafening. “You serious?”

Cas laughed and when Andrea finally released him he rubbed his ears. “Yes. I’m serious Andrea.”

Andrea rocked on her heels not being able to be still from all the excitement. “So what now?”

“Well, as soon as the roads open I’ll send you back to the city to sing for my partners. But don’t worry about that. They’ll love you guaranteed. I’ll warn you the first year will be the hardest. You will be in the studio almost every day. I’ll handle you because you’re Tony’s baby sister so I have your back. I’ll find the best agent possible. I already have one in mind for you. We will schedule appearances and a tour a few months in. Can you handle that?”

“Hell yes I can handle that!” Andrea said as she walked over to the table and sat down. Cas followed behind her to join them.

“Well it’s too early for beers to celebrate,” Benny said.

“Yeah it is but, how about we head over to our apartment for hot chocolate and drink in front of the fireplace.” Dean suggested.

They all agreed and once everyone was bundled back up they headed out the door. Cas and Dean walked in front of Benny and Andrea holding hands. Benny bent down and grabbed snow and formed a perfect ball. He threw and it smacked Cas in the back.

“What the fuck,” Cas exclaimed and turned around to stare Benny down.

“Language Castiel we’re in the presence of a lady,” Dean teased.

Andrea laughed and said, “Please I come from a family with five older brothers. Fuck was my first word.”

Another snowball sailed through the air and hit Dean in the side. “Oh fuck that now it’s on.”

The four of them broke apart and spread out. Dean grabbed some snow and launched it in Benny’s direction but Benny ducked in time. Andrea hit Cas in the leg with one and then quickly turned and hit Dean with another. Cas’ snowball hit Benny in the stomach. Dean scooped up two handfuls of snow and ran in Andrea’s direction. He didn’t even bother with making snowballs he just dumped it on her head which made her squeal. In retaliation Andrea kicked Dean’s legs out from underneath him which made him fall on his ass. She was quick and shoved snow down his shirt. Dean was winded by this time so he decided to say fuck it and lay back in the snow and moved his arms and legs.

“What are you doing,” Benny asked through the laughter.

“SNOW ANGELS!!!”  Dean answered as loud as he could.

“I’ll get in on that fun,” Andrea said and dropped close to Dean and started one of her own. Cas and Benny looked at each other and shrugged.

“Come join us,” Andrea called out.

In unison Benny and Cas said, “Uh no.”

“Party poopers!” Dean replied and when Cas walked near him Dean looked up and gave him a toothy grin. Then he reached out his hand and pulled Cas’ leg out from underneath him. When Cas hit the ground Dean was lightening fast and straddled Cas’ hips. “What’s wrong Cas? You don’t want to make angels with me?”

Before Cas had a chance to reply Benny said, “Get a room you two.” Dean looked over his shoulder and smiled. “Nah there is all the time in the world for sexy fun later tonight.” Dean turned his attention back to Cas and leaned next to his ear and in his best fake southern accent said, “Aint that right cowboy? Giddy up!!”

Cas laughed and flipped Dean on his back. “You Dean Winchester will be the death of me. But it’s so worth it.” He leaned down and kissed Dean softly. “Come on let’s get inside before we freeze.” Cas stood up and reached out to help Dean to his feet. Benny did the same with Andrea and they all headed over to the Deli. They made their way upstairs and Cas went to bulid a fire while Dean busied himself making the hot chocolate.

“So how did you all meet,” Andrea asked when they piled up in front of the fireplace with their drinks.

“We all pretty much knew each other from the day we were born basically. We went to school and graduated together. Cas and I played little league. Benny and I were on the football team in middle and high school,” Dean answered.

“So you were all raised as family,” Andrea asked.

“Well yeah in a way. I have a little brother who lives in the city. Benny is an only child. And Cas has a younger sister and an older brother.”

“These two along with Charlie, Garth, Ash, and Meg have been my family. Let’s just say the Novak clan is… well dysfunctional isn’t the word for it,” Cas said and leaned back on Dean’s chest.

The rest of the day they made conversation about their lives. Andrea even told stories of her family and being raised with five older brothers. Dean pretty much demanded they stay for dinner and made spaghetti and meatballs. After dinner Benny and Andrea headed back to Benny’s apartment. Dean and Cas made curled up in front of the fire again. They didn’t talk much just laid wrapped up in each other and occasionally making out. Finally they drifted off to sleep in each other’s arms.    

*******

When the roads were cleared Cas convinced Dean to drive out to the Hudson with him he took a bag with him that he wouldn't let Dean see what was in it and a blanket. When they got out there Dean turned on the heater because it was still pretty cold outside after the blizzard. Cas climbed in the back seat with a sly grin on his face and Dean chuckled but followed. Wrapping the blanket around both of them for extra warmth Cas kissed Dean. His arms pulled him in close his lips moved over Dean's tracing the pattern of Dean's lips memorizing them. Their tongues met and intertwined dancing inside each other’s mouths. The passion built as the pulled each other even closer. Their breathing getting more ragged as they increased the kissing. Getting more intimate and insistent. Each wanting more, tugging on the other's clothes knowing this was just the start of more to come. Cas pulled away breathless. Dean moved in kissing down his neck, pulling up his shirt to lock onto his nipple making Cas gasp. Cas had to lean back and stop him, breathlessly he said, "Wait... Dean... wait... I have something I wanna tell you first, and then we can make love"

Dean growled at the interruption but nodded. Cas reached in his bag and pulled out a purple velvet bag. He told Dean "In this car, in this exact spot is where I first made love to you. It is also the moment I realized I would love you forever. And I did Dean. I want you to know, I never forgot you."

Cas handed the bag to Dean. Dean opened it and dumped the contents into his hand. Cas wedding ring from their night in Vegas fell out into his hand. Dean looked up at Cas surprised and touched, "You kept it too?"

Cas smiled softly, "Yeah. I couldn't bare to get rid of it. It was all I had left of you. I kept it in my guitar case."

Dean wiped a tear from his eye. He replaced the ring in the bag and set it aside. He pulled Cas to him and kissed him, "I love you Cas, more then you will ever know."

Cas smiled, "If it's half as much as I love you, I have a pretty good idea."

Dean pulled Cas over on his lap and began kissing him again. Cas moving slowly rocking against his body Dean whispered, "Can I make love to you now?"

Cas smiled and took off his shirt. He kissed down Dean's neck and replied "Yes, Please"

Dean gave Cas that knock-your-socks-off smirk and said, "I hope you brought lube in that little bag of yours."

Cas grinned, "I did. I was prepared." He kissed Dean again then his face got serious and he said "By the way baby, I want you to know something. I know it's never come up, but just so you know, you are the ONLY man I have ever had sex with without protection. I just thought that you should know that."

Dean smiled "Thank you Cas. I guess I never asked because I trusted you. But thank you."

They both took their clothes off. Dean laid Cas back on the seat. He reached in the bag and found the lube. He lubed up his fingers and slid one finger in while he sucked on Cas' nipples making Cas arch and moan. Dean sat up as he slipped the second finger in so he could watch the expression on Cas' face. He loved watching Cas arch his back and bite his lip. The way his hips would buck up toward Dean's finger's fucking down on them. Wanting more. Dean loved watching Cas beg to be fucked with ever part of his body. Dean whispered to Cas, "Do you want me Cas? Do you want to feel me inside you?"

Cas bucked his hips up, "Oh, god yes Dean. Please. I need your cock in me. Please make love to me."

Dean was hard and ready. He was panting just from watching how beautiful Cas was when he was getting fucked, "Okay baby, I'll make love to you."

Dean pulled out his fingers and lubed up his cock. He positioned himself between Cas legs. He had to bend Cas nearly in half to fit in the space in the back seat but Cas didn't seem to mind. He slid his cock in and Cas hissed. Dean kept it there for a minute letting Cas adjust then slid his cock the rest of the way in. Cas cried out "Oh... god yes."

Dean pushed in slowly and pulled out. He wanted to feel every motion. He wanted to see Cas, watch him tumble over the edge. His Cas. His love. He needed him. Needed to be the only one to make Cas feel this way, and he knew he was. Cas was essentially praying, “god... oh god...oh my god...god... please...  Dean."

Dean was still rocking slowly in and out driving Cas crazy. He smiled, "What do you want Baby, what do you need?"

Cas panted out, "More... faster Dean... please... oh god… please faster... harder... please Dean."

Dean bit his lower lip. He whispered, "No baby, not this time. Were gonna take this slow."

Cas whined. His muscles clenching around Dean's cock, almost making him loose it.  Dean pushed Cas legs to either side of his head so he could look at him as he continued his slow torture of in and out. Watching Cas face contort. Dean whispered to him with ever push, "I love you. I need you. I want you. You’re mine.”

Cas' body was shaking and tear's had sprung in his eyes. He rested his hand on Dean's face. He whispered back, "So beautiful. So perfect. I love you. Always Mine."

Dean's body shook, he finally increased speed. He reached down and stroked Cas' cock. He chanted out, "Mine...mine...mine" As he Neared climax. Cas came screaming, "Yours! All yours Dean!"

When Dean heard that he came hard and deep. He was shuttering and still gripping tightly to Cas' thighs. He finally eased up and pulled out. It turned out Cas had thought of everything. There were baby wipes in the bag as well for easy clean up and an extra sack to toss them in.

After they were all cleaned up and dressed they cuddled under the blanket together. Cas laid his head against Dean's chest. Dean kissed Cas' head he said, "I can't believe you kept the ring. I really believed you had forgotten me."

Cas wrapped his arms around Dean's arms and whispered, "Who could ever forget you Dean Winchester?"


	19. Love You Out Loud

 Title Song: [Rascal Flatts - Love you out loud](https://youtu.be/cl_7xA8EqO8)

 

 

Over the next couple weeks, Cas was very busy on the phone talking to his partners. He was getting Andrea heard and setting her up with Crowley. He had an idea that he would send out Andrea and Meg to tour and do appearances together as the "Dynamic Duo". Not only was it catchy, it would keep them safe because they were both new to the business and (if they got along) they could watch each other's back. He also had scheduled a huge press conference to announce them to the world. It would be live and for aesthetic value he had rented a giant riverboat that would be docked and used as the stage for the live press conference then the who's who of Archangel Records would be on board to mingle and get to know the girls for a small party as they sailed the Hudson. It also had the added bonus of Cas not having to go into the city and leave Dean to do all of this.

Cas wished he could bring Dean with him on this adventure, but he knew he wouldn't come. He just didn't want anything to do with "City Cas" or that life. However just because he thought it would be fun for her he had invited Charlie. Andrea had actually invited Benny as her plus one and of course Lu was Meg's plus one. 

The big day had finally arrived for the press conference every reporter known to publishing was going to be there. Cas was a little nervous, but he had his own secret reason why he was nervous about today. He came out of the room in a black suit, with a white shirt and a blue tie. He looked at Dean who had shifted quickly and set down his magazine. "Do I look okay? I hate wearing suits."

Dean nodded appreciatively. "Hell yeah you do. You look sexy as hell Novak."

Cas smiled. He leaned in and pulled Dean to his feet by his t-shirt and kissed him soundly. Then he sighed, "Okay. I know you don't want anything to do with all this shit. But please, for me, will you at least  _watch_  the press conference on TV? It’s really important to me."

Dean wrapped his arms around Cas' waist and pulled him in close to him. "Okay. For you. I'll watch babe."

Cas smiled, "Thank you." He kissed him again then pulled back and looked at his watch. "Shit, I gotta go."

Cas grabbed the only coat long enough to cover his suit and keep it relatively clean on the way to the river boat, a tan trench coat and put it on. He smiled at Dean and ran off down the stairs. 

****

Cas met up with Meg and Andrea who were both very excited about the press conference and kind of freaked out at the same time. He told them that was completely normal and to just try and be themselves. That's the girls he fell in love with and the people and press would too. He did, however, warn Meg she was only allowed a max of two shots before the show. She nodded her head and said she understood and would abide by the rule. She didn't want to appear fucked up in front of potentially the entire world on camera. Cas replied with, "That's my girl," and they were ready.

The girls were in steampunk style riverboat captain costumes, Meg's predominately black and gray. Andrea's predominately brown and tan. The only alteration he made to the designer's original idea is he had her put longer sleeves in the tan color on Andrea's costume so she wouldn't freeze outside.

                                       

The girls originally had wanted to wear dancing girl outfits. But after Cas had reminded them they would be standing outside in the cold they relented. Once he showed them the amazing costumes he had had designed for them, they gave in all together and were elated to be in such cute outfits. Cas wondered when people would learn that he really was VERY good at his job. Andrea hugged Benny and Cas noticed he seemed to hold on a bit tighter than would be expected. But then Benny reluctantly let go and smiled saying the customary, "Break a leg darlin'."

Meg kissed Lu and when she went to walk away he slapped her ass and said, "Give em' hell baby." She winked and said, "You know I will angel."

The girls both went over to Crowley he ran them through a list of do's and don’ts when it came to answering questions. It was mostly don'ts. He said in his cultured British accent, "Don't tell them anything about your personal life. Don't answer any questions about your sex life or sexual orientation. For god sake don't give them any details as to where you will be located in the near future. If you are unsure as to whether the question is appropriate or you are uncomfortable with it, you say 'no comment'. Got it? Oh and plug the hell out of your new singles and the upcoming tour. Alright, go on girls. Make yourselves famous. I certainly can't do everything." He smiled.

The girls nodded. Acknowledged they understood the "rules" and stepped onto the boat. The people in the crowd that were not press cheered. They were excited to see the new faces of Archangel Records. The press had already gathered and there were so many cameras it was hard to keep track. It kind of made the girls want to turn and run. But, Meg and Andrea stood their ground and both were a little grateful to have the other up there with them. 

Cas stepped up to the mic, "Hello out there. I called this press conference today to introduce to you to two amazing women. Not counting our lovely girl band, the Phallic Hosts. These are the new girls of Archangel Records. They are our Dynamic Duo Meg De'Vil and Andrea Giovanni. These girls have pipes like you wouldn't believe. You all will see more of that at the annual Archangel Masquerade Halloween ball next week. Although don't worry, you will have the pleasure of hearing them today and asking some questions.

There is, however, another reason I called this press conference. I would like it to go on record, live and internationally, that I am unequivocally and irrevocably in love with Dean Winchester. And I would like to ask him to marry me so I can spend the rest of my life loving him. So Dean if you are watching this, and I hope you are will you marry me?"

From out of the crowd Cas heard someone yell, "YES!"

He looked around and said into the mic, "Excuse me?"

The crowd parted and Dean came running through the crowd, "You heard me, Novak. I said yes."

Dean climbed up the ramp and got onto the boat next to Cas, "Hell yes. And now I am gonna kiss you live on national television."

Cas beamed, "You don't hear me complaining."

Dean pulled Cas to him by his tie and kissed him. The photographers snapped a million pictures and the crowd cheered and whooped. When they finally broke free the reporters started firing questions at Dean. Cas was worried. He didn't know how Dean would react. He never expected the reaction he got.

"Dean! How long have you loved Castiel?"

Dean answered, "As long as I can remember." He smiled and looked to the next reporter shouting his name.

"Dean! Are you worried he will go back to Zar?"

Dean laughed. "No, he was always mine, Zar was a placeholder. Next question."

"Dean! Does all of Castiel's fame bother you?"

 Dean looked at Cas and held his hand, "Nothing bothers me as long as I'm with Cas."

"Castiel! So does this mean it’s over with you and Balthazar?"

"It's been over with me and Zar for months."

"Dean! Are you really going to marry Castiel?"

Dean got a giant grin on his face, "I'll marry him every time he asks."

At that point Cas cut off the questions. "Okay now that that has been settled let's get back to these lovely ladies who are gonna rock this boat! With their killer version of Proud Mary!!"

The crowd applauded vigorously.

Cas shouted into the mic gesturing to the two women, "Sing my Soul Sisters!"

The girls stepped up mics in hands. The band started to play softly in the background Andrea said, "You know Meg, every now and then we like to do things nice and easy... but... that never really works."

Meg smiles and shakes her head, "Not really Andrea because we never EVER do anything nice AND easy. We like to do things nice....and ...Rough!"

The music picks up and the girls start dancing on the makeshift stage and singing.

 

Andrea:

**_Well, I Left a good job in the city_ **

Meg:

**_Workin' for the Man every night and day_ **

Andrea:

**_But I never lost a minute of sleepin'_ **

Meg:

_**Worryin' 'bout the way things might have been** _

 

Andrea:

_**Big wheel keep on turnin'** _

Meg:  
**_Proud Mary keep on burnin'_**

Meg/Andrea:

**_Rollin', rollin', rollin' on the river_ **

 

Andrea:

**_Cleaned a lot of plates in Memphis_ **

Meg:

**_Pumped a lot of tank down in New Orleans_ **

Andrea:

**_But I never saw the good side of a city_ **

Meg:

 _ **'Til I hitched a ride on the**_ **riverboat**   **queen**

 

Andrea:

  _ **Big wheel keep on turnin'**_

Meg:  
**_Proud Mary keep on burnin'_**

Meg/Andrea:

**_Rollin', rollin', rollin' on the river_ **

 

Andrea:

**_If you come down to the River_ **

Meg:

_**Bet you're gonna find some people who live** _

Andrea:

_**You don't have to worry if you have no money** _

_Meg:_

**_People on the river are happy to give_ **

 

Andrea:

  _ **Big wheel keep on turnin'**_

Meg:  
**_Proud Mary keep on burnin'_**

Meg/Andrea:

**_Rollin', rollin', rollin' on the river_ **

                                           

Meg/Andrea:

**_Yea were Rollin', rollin', rollin' on the river..._ **

 

When they finished the crowd went wild. Everyone cheered. The girls were beaming and somewhat winded but happy. Lu jumped up and Meg jumped in his arms and wrapped her legs around him and kissed him. Cas thanked every deity he had decided on the girls wearing pants. Benny apparently decided he was just going to go for it. He grabbed Andrea, dipped her back and kissed her like Rhett Butler kissed Scarlett O’Hara. Andrea didn't mind one little bit.

< RHETT BUTLER KISSING SCARLETT O'HARA

Cas came up to the two couples and cleared his throat loudly. "I hate to interrupt, but Crowley can't field all your questions. You girls gotta get back out there and answer some yourself. As they say, your public awaits."

The girl's gave equally sheepish smiles and ran past Cas to go back out onto the boat to answer the reporter’s questions. Cas gave a deep sigh smiled lovingly at Dean and said "Hey, would you be willing to be my date on this boat ride? Since you handled the paparazzi so well earlier. This is just going to be Archangel Bands, producers, and agents."

Dean arched his brow, "Archangel Bands? Does that include Fallen Angels?"

Cas nodded, "It does. It can't be helped babe. I'm sorry."

Dean grinned, "Oh, I'll be there, baby. You can count on that. Let me just run home and get dressed."

Cas smiled, "Thank you, Winchester." Then he raised an eyebrow, "But no fights, promise."

Dean kissed him, "I promise. I'll get too much satisfaction out of showing off the fact that you're mine. "

Cas laughed, "Okay. I can live with that. Hurry and change I have MORE damn questions to answer."

 ****

Cas was waiting on the pier when Dean showed back up and the only thought that went through his head when Dean stepped out of the Impala was, "Damn!"

Cas realized he had never seen Dean in a suit. This wasn't just any suit though. This was a blast from the past, circa 1940's suit and Dean wore it like it was made for him.

 

Cas wanted to jump him right then and there. Dean approached him with confidence and said, "You sure you're ready for this Novak?"

Cas wrapped his arm in Dean's. "There's no one I'd rather have by my side Winchester. Let's do this."

They headed up the plank. Cas nodded to the man that was waiting and he pulled the plank to launch the boat. Dean was the last one they had been waiting for. As they headed inside Dean was surprised to see Cas had gone all out with the party planning. It looked like a real riverboat in its hay day. There were gambling tables and a bar set up. A piano man played upbeat music. Waitresses in dancing girl outfits carried around trays of drinks. It was amazing and Dean was impressed to say the least. He was also a little star struck, but he wouldn't admit it. All the bands that Archangel represented were there. The Leviathan's, The Lonely Hunter's, The Phallic Hosts, and of course whether Dean liked it or not The Fallen Angels. 

Cas pulled Dean back, "Hey Dean before we get into all the madness. I wanted to give you something. I know it’s not like you’re going to wear it on your hand and that's cool with me. So…" Cas pulled out of his pocket two boxes. One was a longer jewelry box and the other was your standard ring box. He opened the longer box first and showed Dean a very nice black gold chain. He explained, "What I have in this other box I hope you will wear on this chain."

Dean touched the chain and he had a soft smile, "The chain is beautiful Cas, what's behind door number two?" He cocked a smile.

Cas took a Deep breath and opened the second box. Inside was a black gold ring with a marbled sapphire and emerald inset in the center.

"It might seem dumb but, when I ask someone to marry me I give them a ring. I chose this one because the green and blue match our eyes. You have worn that 14 karat barely nothin' ring around your neck for ten years. Would you do me the honor of wearing this one from now on?" 

Dean wiped a tear from his eye and wiped his nose. "This boat is making my allergies act up."

Cas smiled lovingly, "I'm sure that's it."

Dean looked at Cas, "Yes Cas, I will wear it forever. Starting right now."

He took the chain out of the box and threaded the ring through it. Cas helped him attach it in the back. The green and blue hit the lights in contrast to the darker colors of the ring and his outfit. Dean touched the ring around his neck. He could not have been happier. Even the thought of being in a room full of celebrities didn't compare to the fact that Cas was really and truly his. He knew no matter what Cas wasn't leaving again.

 

Cas took Dean by the hand, they weren't usually the hand holding type, but tonight it was a show of solidarity. Cas wanted everyone to know he was with Dean. Dean loved the fact that Cas was being possessive and 'showing him off'. They approached a couple one had dark hair and wore a nice black suit. He seemed a bit stiff to Dean. The woman with him was so blonde she was nearly platinum and she was very small in build. That's not to say she wasn't tall, she was just very thin. Cas introduced them. "Dean, this is my business partner Michael and his wife Lilith. Lilith, Michael, I want you to meet the love of my life, Dean." 

Michael extended his hand and Dean shook it. "It is nice to finally meet you, Dean. You've certainly have caused your share of trouble for us." He teased with a smile.

Dean smiled and teased back, "I assure you 90% of that wasn't my fault."

Michael laughed. Then Lilith extended her hand and Dean took it gently and kissed the top of it and winked saying, "A pleasure."

She pulled her hand back with a giggle, "Oh he's a charmer."

Cas smiled, "That's why I fell in love with him. Well, we better be off and make the rounds. Enjoy the night."

"You do the same Castiel," Michael said.

As Cas was looking around for where Gabe had run off to Dean spotted Zar. He was at the bar of course. He was with a guy in his late twenties, with black hair and blue eyes and an athletic build. Dean cracked up laughing. He nudged Cas to look over. Cas whispered sarcastically, "Boy, he doesn't have a type."

Dean said, "That's okay. I'm glad I waited for the real deal."

Cas said, "Me too. Now let's find Gabe. Zar can go fuck himself or rather his clone version of me," he chuckled.

They saw Gabe over at the Phallic Host's table chatting up the drummer. Cas was shocked and a bit impressed to see Charlie chatting up the lead singer. They walked over. Cas started in, "Gabe, you haven't actually officially met…'

Gabe cut him off extending his hand to Dean. "Your ex-husband-turned fiance Dean Winchester. The pleasure is all mine, Sir. And can I just say GRRREAT song choice. I loved it. It took everything in me not to laugh out loud at Zar's face."

Dean kind of chuckled and shook his hand, "Uh, yea it’s nice to meet you too."

Then Gabe said, "And this lovely woman beside me is Jophiel, But, everyone just calls her Jophi or JoJo. When she isn't being harassed by me she drums for the Phallic Hosts."

Jophiel extended her hand. She had a model's body and was wearing a gold dress that basically just draped across her neck and hung onto her thigh's and butt area. Her back was completely exposed and if she moved wrong, maybe more. She had Grecian type sandal heels with crisscross straps up to mid-calf to complete the ensemble. She had tons of blonde hair that she had tried her best to pin up, but beautiful ringlets of it kept falling to frame her face and down her neck. So you can imagine Dean's surprise when she spoke and sounded both cultured and intelligent. She also spoke in a British accent "Please, pay no attention to Gabriel. He really means well. Also, trust me, if he were truly harassing me, I would have my lawyer on the phone faster than you could say, Louis Vuitton." She laughed an infectious laugh and pinched Gabe's cheek making him go all goo-goo eyed at her.  

Gabe continued, pointing out a curvaceous redhead, "This spit-fire here is Seraphim aka Sera she's their bassist."

Seraphim wore a red dress that was very form fitting stopped just below her bottom and crisscrossed across her chest and again across her back. She leaned across the table and spoke in an Irish accent. "Well, you're just a fine bit o'stuff. If you were on the market I'd give it a go. But it would be about as useful as tits on a bull. Sorry, don't mind me I'm just blatherin' on. I'm a bit bullocks right now." She laughed.

Dean laughed, "That's alright, it’s a party. I'm pretty sure a drink or five is allowed." He laughed loudly to show her not to be embarrassed. It was just one more trait about Dean that Cas loved. He had the ability to put people at ease. 

Gabe introduced the next woman at the table as Charmaine the lead guitarist. She sat regally. She had dark walnut colored skin and her hair was cropped short and done up in a nice chic fashion. The only thing taking away from what could have been a business type cut were the streaks of purple running throughout her hair highlighting the natural black. She wore a deep purple Grecian style dress that had only one strap and cinched under the bustline. The gown ended (surprisingly) at her knees. When she stood up, Dean saw that she must be at least 5'11" and she was in white ballet flats, but they laced completely up her calf to her knee giving the most striking contrast to her purple gown and dark complexion. She shook Dean's hand. Her accent was crisp American as if she probably studied in similar schools to Cas. "It is very nice to meet you, Dean, I'm sorry, but I really must get something to eat."

Dean smiled, "It's been an honor, Charmaine. Thank you for taking the time."

She smiled again and lightly kissed his cheek. "We'll make sure you get an autograph from the group."

Dean smiled widely, "Thanks!"

Cas laughed. Then Charlie who was all but climbing all over the lead singer introduced her before Gabe got a chance. She smiled widely, "And this beautiful siren is the one and only Bat Kol (no e). She's the Lead singer of the Phallic Hosts".

Bat had long straight jet black hair that went all the way down to the small of her back with thick blue streaks through it. She had on Manolo Blahnik peep toe sling-back booties with a zipper instep from his fall line that year. A blue A-line flair skirt with black crinoline underneath and a black t-shirt torn and hanging off one shoulder that had the words, " **I DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT MY REPUTATION** " printed on it. She also had a  _DeathStar_  pendant around her neck that Cas had never noticed before. That combined with the small rainbow pinky ring she wore is probably what drew Charlie to her in the first place. Bat extended her hand keeping her other arm around Charlie. Much to Dean's surprise the accent that left her mouth was New York. "How's it goin'? I hear you're makin' an honest man outta Cassie ova here."

Dean laughed as he shook her hand. "I guess so. I hope you know that girl you’re cozying up to happens to be Cas' best friend. Just a bit of friendly advice." Dean winked.

Bat smiled and rubbed Charlie’s back, "I'll make sure to keep that in mind. Good lookin' out." 

Cas wrapped his hand around Dean's waist and led him away from the Phallic Hosts table. "Well, now you have met two famous bands, three if you count Zar, which I'm sure you don't. I don't know about you but those girls always make my head spin. I don't know if it’s all the colors or the accents." He laughed.

Dean kissed him, "That was awesome of you Cas. I can see everyone really likes and trusts you. Maybe… and I'm only saying maybe. But maybe you could try and still work and live here. So you don't completely have to give all this up. Like go into the city a couple times a week or something. It seems like you really do make a difference."

Cas grabbed Dean and kissed him, really and truly kissed him. He didn't give a damn who was watching. When he pulled back all he said was, "I fucking love you Winchester." 

They spotted Benny and Andrea over at the craps table. It was the cutest thing. Every time they would win Andrea would wrap her arms around Benny and jump up and down and kiss his cheek. If Benny could blush he probably would have. Cas went to lead Dean over there. Dean said he had to take a leak then he would join them.

The bathrooms were the fancy kind where the urinals were actually individually enclosed. So Dean finished his business and was washing his hands when the other stall door opened and just his luck, out walked Zar. Zar began washing his hands and he said to Dean, "So, I guess this means you've won."

Dean grabbed a couple paper towels to dry his hands and shook his head, "Nope."

Zar walked up grabbing some paper towels too, "No?"

Dean tossed the paper towels in the trash. "No. I didn't 'win' Zar because it was never a contest. Cas was always mine." Then Dean walked out of the men's room. He left Zar to think whatever damn thoughts he wanted to.

Dean came up behind Cas and wrapped his arms around his waist. He asked Cas what they were playing. Cas said, "Right now? Texas Hold 'Em."

Dean shrugged, "Well, whatever game we play, I'm sure we'll win."


	20. Monster Mash

[Moster Mash - Chapter Title Inspiration](https://youtu.be/SOFCQ2bfmHw)

It was the end of October. The leaves had changed to golden hues. The chill was in the air. All around the town love was blooming and since the masquerade ball was tonight, panic was also running its course.

Over at Love Bites, Andrea was looking at her costume for the event. She bit her lip and walked around it and back around again. The dress had crinoline material on the bottom that would fall mid-calf on her. The whole left side was red and the whole right side was black. She intended to wear tights underneath in opposite colors and a pair of high heels depicting Harley Quinn and The Joker together in comic book scenes.

The top was a red corset with black stripes on the stitching areas. The bra area had one side red one side black, opposite to the skirt. She had a white choker necklace she would wear with it that had white dangling balls coming off it to depict Harley’s jester top. Her headpiece was the same as Harleys. She would wear the simple black mask and red lips. She and Crowley decided not to paint her face white.

She looked at Benny, "I'm not sure about the costume. What if people don't realize who I am supposed to be? It is abstract because it’s formal and because I insisted it be modest."

Benny shook his head, “Alright suga couple things. First, there gonna know you’re Harley Quinn, it's obvious. Second, I'm glad you're stickin' by your morals. Don't you go lettin' them tell you any different."

Andrea smiled and hugged Benny, "Thanks, Benny Bear, I don't know what I'd do without you."

Benny Laughed and pulled her in for a kiss. "For starters you'd probably never get dressed for that darn ball. Which would be a shame, cause you made me buy a dang purple suit and green tie and everything."

* * *

Cas was standing in the living room. He had on a dark blue silk button-down shirt and black slacks. He was wearing a black leather trench coat over the top. On his feet was a pair of black combat boots. His hair had been gelled so it was slicked back but kind of messy. He yelled into the hall, "Come on Winchester, this was your idea. Let me see it."

Dean came out of the bathroom. His hair was blonde and slicked back completely. He had on black leather pants that were tucked into doc martin boots that went halfway up his calf. His shirt was a tight black v-neck. He was wearing a full-length black trench coat. Cas looked him over and covered his mouth so he wouldn't crack a smile. He cleared his throat, "Well, you definitely look like Spike."

Dean raised his first two fingers in a backward peace sign and said in a fake British accent, "Piss off Angel." Cas shook his head and laughed. They heard someone knocking on their door downstairs. When they got there it was Charlie. She jumped inside. She was wrapped in a long coat that resembled a Jedi robe. Neither man commented. "It's freezing out there, guys. How long does it take to answer a damn door? Hey! Great costumes. Holy shit Dean; did you ACTUALLY dye your hair?"  
  
Dean nodded, "Yeah, It will grow back. Besides, I was blonde as a kid, it's not so bad. Let's head over to Love Bites and see if they're ready. The limo should be arriving soon. By the way Charlie, cool hair piece."

Charlie grinned. She had a hair extension that gave her a long braid that wrapped around her head once in the back pinned by what Charlie felt were a million bobby pins and then draped over her shoulder.

When they got to the bar, they were amazed at Andrea. She looked beautiful, kind of crazy like Harley, but beautiful all the same. She had chosen to do the black outline around her mouth like joker does to make her smile seem more demonic. She shrugged, "It's the day before Halloween and it's a Halloween ball."

Everyone agreed. They were also surprised to see Benny in a deep purple tuxedo with a lighter purple shirt underneath and a lime green tie. He had a matching green mask that covered just the eye area on as well. The last edition Andrea put on his lapel made everyone laugh but it really was perfect, it was a happy face pin and it said ‘smile’.

Benny looked at Dean and Cas, "So who are you two supposed to be?"

Before they could answer Charlie piped in "I swear Benny. You really need to get a TV. They are Spike and Angel, from the awesome show Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Dean is Spike (who's kind of a bad vampire but everyone kind of loves him anyway) and Cas is Angel (the vampire with a soul)."

Benny nods, "Okay, thanks for clearing that up Charlie."

A few minutes later Meg showed up. Andrea clapped her hands and giggled. "Meg! Your costume turned out amazing!"

Meg smiled, "I gotta say, I agree, I'm kind of loving it." Lu came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, "I'm loving it too." Megs costume was a form fitting leather corset with random white stitching patterns on it that went down all the way to about two inches above her knees. The rest of the dress went down to her ankle, but it was shredded pieces of leather and crinoline. She had on knee length, lace up, black vinyl stiletto boots. On her head was a bejeweled cat woman mask, her hair hung down in the back.

The coolest piece of her wardrobe was her nail rings. They were silver but sparkled like diamonds and they slid on the tips of her fingers. They gave the appearance of her having cat claws that were decorated for the ball. The rings were both beautiful and dangerous looking. Lu wore a black tuxedo with a face mask that pointed up to indicate it could be batman and a black tie with silver bats all over it. His cuff links were the bat symbol.

Dean had to commend both Lu and Benny. Their costumes might not be over the top, but at least they did dress up and they were going to a dance to support the women they cared about. Since neither of these men was the dress up and dance type, it was really impressive. Dean wouldn't admit it, but he was nervous as hell. Dressing up for Halloween was easy. Going to some fancy shindig at some fancy castle with a bunch of rock stars? Yeah, that was a bit nerve-wracking. Cas handed Dean a plain black masquerade mask and Cas put on an identical one.

The limo arrived and Crowley stepped out. He was in a black tuxedo with a burgundy shirt underneath and a black tie. He wore a burgundy mask. Cas asked him, "What are you supposed to be?" Crowley replied with a smile, "I'm Crowley." Cas shook his head and they all piled into the limo.

* * *

When they arrived at Belcourt Castle they were not disappointed. It was beautiful and eerie. As they drove through the gold and rod iron gates and parked. The women had to hold tight to the men so their heels wouldn't catch on the brick walkway leading up to the house. On either side of the walk way were perfectly manicured bushes and little cherub statues that in the daylight were probably pretty at night they seemed as if they were waiting for you to turn your back so they could pounce.

Rumor had it Belcourt Castle was haunted, they even gave ghost tours in the warmer season's. That is most likely why Archangel Record's chose to have their ball here this year. Nothing says Halloween like a haunted castle. The ball was being held in the gothic ball room. It was the best place for it as it had enough space to dance and also set up the stage for the musicians. As they entered the ballroom they couldn’t help but gasp. Whoever the decorator was needed a raise. Besides the beauty that was already there, namely the crystal chandeliers that dropped from the ceiling sending off light in many different directions, the suits of armor that lined the walls, the floor to ceiling stained glass windows and the Louis the XIII chairs lining the walls.

The ceiling had intricate spider webs (not just gauze thrown to look like webs) the webs were of a silken material and spun across the entire ceiling attached to the chandeliers creating beautiful patterns. Here and there you would see a spider that had dropped down from the webbing, its belly bejeweled to send fragments of color down onto the dance floor. A light fog crawled across the dance floor giving the illusion of a grave yard.

The stage was set up on the far end of the ballroom, black velvet draped over it. There was a screen behind it that Cas told them would depict whatever scene the band had chosen for their performance. Foot lights were set in the front part of the stage to light the bands as needed. There were two giant speakers on either side of the stage as well.

The food and drinks were served on a large banquet table on the far side of the hall. The table had black velvet with aged and faded lace covering it. The serving dishes appeared to be tarnished silver. The plates and cups were black with silver writing **_Archangel Spooky Bash 2008_**. There was a server dressed as a very old butler he would say, "I'm sorry, the master doesn't get many humans... I mean guests very often."

A woman with frazzled red hair with streaks of white in it wearing a maid costume appeared. She yelled, "May I take your coats!"

They laughed and let her take them as she began to remove them anyway. Then all eyes fell on Charlie. She was in a gown, a real gown. The top was one piece down to her hips made of soft brown leather with gold stitching that exactly replicated princess Leia's slave bikini. The sides of the top had criss-cross brown lacing. The bottom was of a silky material and slit nearly up to the hip on both sides of the dress. Her shoes were olive green mid-calf stiletto boots with gold lacing. She also had a gold arm band that wrapped around her bicep. She looked at everyone with their mouth's hanging open and shrugged, "What?"

Crowley was the only one with the balls to say somewhat what they all were thinking "Darling, they are all mesmerized by the fact that you have attired yourself in a gown instead of your usual ghastly t-shirt, flannel, jeans combo."

For a while, there was a period of meet and greet. Mostly time for the producers to cozy up to the investors and convince them that a certain band is defiantly the way they want to go. Finally, the festivities started. They all went on a 'ghost tour' of the castle. 

There was a suit of armor that apparently screamed in the month of March, he was said to have been impaled through his visor into his eye socket and died screaming. There were a few chairs that you could feel a cold spot or other things. One person swore one of the chairs had "pushed him off" when he tried to sit on it. After the tour, they all returned to the ballroom for the performances and dancing.

* * *

The first group up was the Phallic Hosts. They were all dressed as broken dolls. Their arms and faces expertly made up to appear as if they were porcelain that pieces had shattered or broken off of. Underneath the broken pieces, you could see what appeared to be real muscle tissue. Each of them was wearing their signature color. Their Bassist in red her red hair in lopsided pigtails with streaks of black ribbons through it. Their guitarist in purple, her hair had extensions in it to be little braids of purple and black falling from her head with little barrettes. Their drummer was wearing white and gold. Her mass of curls were put up in two pigtails and dropped down with two large white bows to hold them in place. 

The singer was in a black crinoline gown with the front left side torn off. She had blue and black striped stockings underneath and platform Mary Jane shoes. She was also wearing a patchwork blue and black apron over the top of her gown. Her blue and black hair had been pinned back into a blue ribbon headband. Before they started she looked over at Charlie winked and blew her a kiss. The screen behind them lit up with a scene of a laboratory and flashes of lightening. Then she shouted into the mic, "ONE,TWO,THREE,FOUR!"… and the band started playing.

  
**There's a skeleton Key  
That lies on the stairs  
I should have been  
A little prepared**

**Picked up the key  
Opened the door  
Don't have a clue  
What I am in for**

**There's a boy on the counter  
Cut up in pieces  
Still making sounds  
He's barely breathing**

**I'm not a doctor  
I can't make him better  
All I can do is try to  
put him together**

**He's made of staples an broken bones  
Bruises from chapters  
Stories untold  
If I had a wish  
It'd be make him whole  
He's barely alive**

**I'm gonna call him mine  
I'm gonna call him my Frankenstein  
Cut up  & bleeding from inside  
I'm gonna call him mine**

**The skeleton key  
Is still in my pocket  
A small part of me  
Wants to close the door and lock it**

**Wherever we go  
They scream at the monster  
Wherever we go  
The gunshots are fired**

**He's made of staples an broken bones  
Bruises from chapters  
Stories untold  
If I had a wish  
It'd be make him whole  
He's barely alive  
So is his soul**

**Bring him to the ground  
Bring him down**

**I'm gonna call him mine  
I'm gonna call him my Frankenstein  
Cut up  & bleeding from inside  
I'm gonna call him mine**

**I'm gonna call him mine  
I'm gonna call him my Frankenstein  
Cut up  & bleeding from inside  
I'm gonna call him mine**

[Stiched up heart - Frankenstein](https://youtu.be/XVKW-aytBWI)

The crowd clapped enthusiastically as they finished their song. Bat got down off the stage and walked over to Charlie and kissed her. Charlie said, "Woman that was the sexiest thing I've ever seen. You are forgiven for not dressing up as Han solo."

Bat chuckled. "Glad you approve. Now let’s find me some damn water. I'm dying over here. Screaming like that is no picnic."

Gabe walked over to Cas and Dean he grinned "Yep, I signed those girls, I'm just saying."

Cas shook his head "Yeah yeah, we know. They're awesome, good job Gabe. Who are you supposed to be anyway?"

Gabe had on a dark green tux with a gold tie, a green and gold helmet with antler-like horns and a gold mask. He looked offended, "I'm Loki."

Dean and Cas both tried to hide the laugh, neither succeeded. Gabe furrowed his brow. "Hey, Jophiel has a thing for asgardians okay. I like Loki better that Thor." He crossed his arms defiantly.

Jophiel sauntered over wrapped an arm around Gabe's waist, "Did I ever tell you, that green is my second favorite color, after gold." Gabe smiled at the guys, put his arm around Jophiel and walked away.

* * *

The next band was setting up and it was the Lonely Hunters. Dean grabbed Cas' hand and pulled him closer. Cas loved how excited Dean got about little things. When Dean was fixing his shirt the ring around his neck spilled out. Cas smiled, he walked up behind Dean and wrapped his arms around his waist he whispered in Dean’s ear, "Do you know how much I love you?"

Dean was surprised. Cas wasn't usually so sweet. He turned in his arms and bit his ear. He said, "Not exactly, but I know that it’s more then I could ever have hoped for."

Cas kissed him then turned him back around to face the stage. "Don't want you to miss one of your favorite bands." Dean laughed.

The Lonely Hunters were in Zombie makeup. They had on tuxedos but the shirts were torn or shredded and they were dusty. Some even had a cobweb or two on them. They began the song with all of their heads down as if they lacked the strength or dexterity to move and then their head's rose and they began to really get into the song. Their back ground was a graveyard and they had extra fog rolling across the stage. They didn't have any kind of signal that anyone could see they just began their song.

 **I got opposition every single day**  
**You always want the same thing done the same old way**  
**Funny how you always think you're always right**  
**Who died and made you God, and did it happen overnight?**

 **Don't dance like that anymore**  
**Don't wear those clothes anymore**  
**Don't take that stance anymore**  
**Turn it down, do what you're told**  
**If it's too loud, well then you must be too old**

 **Wake up the dead now**  
**Make 'em roll in their graves now**  
**Shake up the dead now**  
**Rising up from the ground**  
**Wake 'em up, shake 'em down**

 **You like to watch and judge my life up on the screen**  
**You figured out what goes on behind the scenes**  
**Got a rumor that you want to show and tell**  
**Nobody's gonna buy the lie you're trying to sell**

 **Don't talk like that anymore**  
**Don't speak your mind anymore**  
**Don't think those thoughts anymore**  
**Turn it down, do what you're told**  
**If it's too loud, well then you must be too old**

 **Wake up the dead now**  
**Make 'em roll in their graves now**  
**Shake up the dead now**  
**Rising up from the ground**  
**Wake 'em up, shake 'em down**

 **Wake up you sleepy heads get out of bed**  
**If we make some noise we'll wake the dead**

 **Make 'em roll in their graves when they hear this sound**  
**Raise 'em up from the ground, turn 'em upside down**

 **Wake up you sleepy heads get out of bed**  
**If we make some noise we'll wake the dead**

 **Make 'em roll in their graves when they hear this sound**  
**Raise 'em up from the ground, turn 'em upside down**

 **Wake up the dead now**  
**Make 'em roll in their graves now**  
**Shake up the dead now**  
**Rising up from the ground**  
**Wake 'em up, shake 'em down**

 **Wake up the dead now**  
**Make 'em roll in their graves now**  
**Shake up the dead now**  
**Rising up from the ground**  
**Wake 'em up, shake 'em down**

[Family Force 5 - Wake the dead](https://youtu.be/atHqhVjeJPU)

The crowd applauded. Dean shouted, "Yeah! That was fuckin' awesome!"

Cas smiled. "It was pretty amazing. And, not to toot my horn but I signed them."

Dean looked at Cas and pretended to be totally serious. "Novak, if you hadn't of proposed already, I'm pretty sure that would have made me marry you." Then he burst out laughing.

Andrea came running up to them Benny hot on her heels. "I think I'm having a panic attack" Benny massaged her shoulders "You’re not havin' a panic attack ‘Drea. I promise everything will be fine."

Cas furrowed his brow, going into producer mode. "What's the problem?"

Andrea looked at him wide-eyed, "I'm up next."

Cas cocked his head to the side in confusion. Dean pretended not to think it was adorable. Cas asked, "Okay, why is that a problem?"

Andrea gestured wildly, "Because. I'm. Up. Next. What if I mess up?"

Cas looked at her seriously, "You won't."

She calmed down and looked at him, "I won't? That's your answer?"

Cas nodded, "Yep. You’re good, damn good. The best I've seen in a hell of a long time. You go sing with your magical pipes sweetheart and you won't fail. I'm not worried."

She grinned and breathed out. "Okay. I can do this." Benny gave Cas a grateful nod. Andrea left to hit the stage.

Crowley had arranged for the band to be dressed in brightly colored suits and clown masks. The screen changed to Andrea's background which was the word's Ha ha ha written in different fonts and different angles in black and red on a white background. Andrea turned and nodded to the guitarist, he started to play and the rest of the band picked up.

**I cut my bangs with some rusty kitchen scissors  
I screamed his name ‘til the neighbors called the cops  
I numbed the pain at the expense of my liver  
Don’t know what I did next, all I know I couldn’t stop**

**Word got around to the barflies and the baptists  
My mama’s phone started ringin’ off the hook  
I can hear her now sayin’ she ain’t gonna have it  
Don’t matter how you feel, it only matters how you look**

**Go and fix your make up, girl, it’s just a break up  
Run and hide your crazy and start actin’ like a lady  
'Cause I raised you better, gotta keep it together  
Even when you fall apart  
But this ain’t my mama’s broken heart**

**Wish I could be just a little less dramatic  
Like a Kennedy when Camelot went down in flames  
Leave it to me to be holdin’ the matches  
When the fire trucks show up and there’s nobody else to blame**

**Can’t get revenge and keep a spotless reputation  
Sometimes revenge is a choice you gotta make  
My mama came from a softer generation  
Where you get a grip and bite your lip just to save a little face**

**Go and fix your make up, girl, it’s just a break up  
Run and hide your crazy and start actin’ like a lady  
'Cause I raised you better, gotta keep it together  
Even when you fall apart  
But this ain’t my mama’s broken heart**

**Powder your nose, paint your toes  
Line your lips and keep 'em closed  
Cross your legs, dot your eyes  
And never let 'em see you cry**

*Andrea paused tilted her head and pointed both her fingers at her lips smiling a huge fake joker smile. Then she grabbed the mic and belted out the chorus*

**Go and fix your make up, well it’s just a break up  
Run and hide your crazy and start actin’ like a lady  
'Cause I raised you better, gotta keep it together  
Even when you fall apart  
But this ain’t my mama’s broken heart**

[Miranda Lambert - Mama's Broken Heart](https://youtu.be/TObdVCAygpc)

Andrea looked around when she had finished the song. The crowd applauded. A few women even said hell yes and woo! When she stepped down a girl ran over to her and said, "I just have to tell you that was such a perfect song for Harley. Your voice is amazing too. I know we’re not really supposed to do this here but, would it be alright if I got an autograph?"

Andrea beamed, "Sure, I think I can make an exception." She signed the woman's napkin and the woman thanked her again and walked off.

Benny came up and picked her up in a hug "That's my honey bee. I knew you would knock em dead."

Andrea giggled and Benny set her down, "Now I can eat, I'm starving. I was too nervous before I performed."

* * *

The Fallen Angels were up next. As they were setting up Dean sighed and said sarcastically, "Yay, my favorite band"

Cas put his arm around his waist. "I know it sucks but they are part of the lineup. Plus, you liked them before you hated Zar."

Dean shrugged, "I know, but now I hate looking at his face."

Cas turned Dean toward him, "Then don't, look at me instead, the man who loves you and is going to marry you. On purpose this time." His mouth quirked in a half grin.

Dean said, "Fine but we're dancing to whatever the hell they perform and we're doing it within eyesight of Zar."

Cas shrugged, "It’s a bit juvenile and petty... but...okay, I'm in." He pulled Dean to the center of the dance floor where Zar couldn't miss them.

You had to admit their costumes were pretty creative. Each of them stood in a spot light completely still. Their background screen was the house of wax the marquee reading Ghosts of Musicians Past. Zar was dressed as John Lennon. Raphael their guitarist was dressed as Jimi Hendrix. Their keyboardist was dressed as Jerry lee Lewis and their Drummer was dressed as Keith Moon. All the spot lights turned off at the same time and the band began to play as they were bathed in a blue light from the floor lights. Cas thought, _"damn, that boy has showmanship."_

**We make our agreements about when to meet  
And I'll leave you in the doorway  
The cold evening aches as it leaves in it's wake  
Oh the memories left by the day  
Oh and questioning why as you look to the sky  
That is cloudless up above our heads  
And thoughts come to mind how our short little lives  
Haven't left the path that they will tread**

**They will tread...**

**I'll come back to haunt you  
Memories will taunt you  
And I will try to love you  
It's not like I'm above you**

**Will wisdom we learn as our minds they do burn  
All the ties to naivety and youth  
To adults we grow and maturity shows  
Oh the terrifying rarity of truth  
As you turn to your mind and youth thoughts they rewind  
To old happenings and things that are done  
You can't find what's past make that happiness last  
Seeing from those eyes what you've become**

**What you've become...**

**I'll come back to haunt you  
Memories will taunt you  
And I will try to love you  
It's not like I'm above you**

**I will see you there  
Will see you there...  
  
**

[Bastille - Haunt](https://youtu.be/9Sg8mLkSKQw)

Dean had no doubt in his mind Zar wrote that song with Cas in mind. He was just glad that through the whole slow, melodic song, Cas held him close. He looked directly into Dean's eyes only breaking eye contact long enough to whisper the dirty thoughts Deans leather pants were inspiring. Occasionally he would smile or kiss him. Essentially, if Zar was watching, what he saw was two men who were clearly in love. At that point in the night there was a break in the musician lineup. The frizzy haired maid came out with a giant gong and hit it and shouted, "Dinner is prepared!"

* * *

They all went into the great hall, it was spectacular. It felt a bit like you were inside a music box. All the walls were gold with mirrors in each panel and on the ceiling. Every little light refracted off the other lights making the room seem brighter with a lot less light. They all sat down at large tables that were lined in red velvet. There were a couple different glasses and a few different forks. Dean gulped.

Charlie, who was sitting next to him, held his hand under the table and whispered, "Don't worry, we'll figure this out together." Dean nodded.

Cas leaned in to both of them, "I promise, no one is watching you."

Bat leaned in on the other side, "I know the etiquette, I just don't give a fuck." She smiled widely.

Cas said, "Luckily it’s just normal food, we don't like to creep people out while they are trying to eat."

The meal for the evening started with a delicious pumpkin and yellow squash soup. The main course was steak medium rare (unless you had checked the vegetarian box on the RSVP) Red roasted potatoes and asparagus stalks with holandaise sauce. For dessert they served pumpkin pie parfaits in beautiful orange glass dessert goblets.

Dean took a bite and his eyes widened. "This is amazing. It’s like… pie in a cup. Cas… you gotta figure out how they do this." Cas said he would get the recipe and make Dean any "Pie in a cup" he wanted.

* * *

The meal eaten, all the guests returned to the ballroom. The Leviathans were up next. Clearly they had put a lot of time into their costumes. Their background was a black and white image on a film reel that looked like a movie title that said The Leviathans present The Monster. The lead singer was the Phantom of the opera. His skin was airbrushed grey to appear to be in black and white. His outfit was a black suit, black tie and white shirt with a grey hooded cape. His mask was white and covered his whole face except for his mouth. Their bassist was The Mummy. She had a mini-dress on that was made completely of layer upon layer of gauze and then taped on with white surgical tape. Her hair was wrapped up underneath her full mummy head wrap only showing her eyes and mouth. She had gauze finger-less gloves that came up to her shoulders and knee high white boots.

Their guitarist was the wolfman, he had a full wolf mask on and a tuxedo. The back of his hands were covered in fur too. Last but not least their drummer was Frankenstein's monster his skin had been airbrushed green. He wore a tux with large white stitching on all the seams. He had black stitching across his neck and wrists. He also had two bolts that seem to protrude from his neck. Since it was a masquerade ball he wore a doctors mask across his mouth and nose so only his eyes were visible. The mummy started in on bass and then the wolfman came in on guitar then the phantom came in with vocals the same time Frankenstein hit the drums.

  
**The secret side of me**    
**I never let you see**    
**I keep it caged**    
**But I can't control it**    
**So stay away from me**    
**The beast is ugly**    
**I feel the rage**    
**And I just can't hold it**

 **It's scratching on the walls**    
**In the closet, in the halls**    
**It comes awake**    
**And I can't control it**    
**Hiding under the bed**    
**In my body, in my head**    
**Why won't somebody come and save me from this?**    
**Make it end!**

 **I feel it deep within,**    
**It's just beneath the skin**    
**I must confess that I feel like a monster**    
**I hate what I've become**    
**The nightmare's just begun**    
**I must confess that I feel like a monster**    
**I, I feel like a monster**    
**I, I feel like a monster**

 **My secret side I keep**    
**Hid under lock and key**    
**I keep it caged**    
**But I can't control it**    
**Cause if I let him out**    
**He'll tear me up**    
**And break me down**    
**Why won't somebody come and save me from this?**    
**Make it end!**

 **I feel it deep within,**    
**It's just beneath the skin**    
**I must confess that I feel like a monster**    
**I hate what I've become**    
**The nightmare's just begun**    
**I must confess that I feel like a monster**

 **I feel it deep within,**    
**It's just beneath the skin**    
**I must confess that I feel like a monster**    
**I, I feel like a monster**    
**I, I feel like a monster**

 **It's hiding in the dark**    
**It's teeth are razor sharp**    
**There's no escape for me**    
**It wants my soul,**    
**It wants my heart**

 **No one can hear me scream**    
**Maybe it's just a dream**    
**Or maybe it's inside of me**    
**Stop this monster!**

 **I feel it deep within,**    
**It's just beneath the skin**    
**I must confess that I feel like a monster**    
**I hate what I've become**    
**The nightmare's just begun**    
**I must confess that I feel like a monster**

 **I feel it deep within,**    
**It's just beneath the skin**    
**I must confess that I feel like a monster**    
**I'm gonna lose control**    
**Here's something radical**    
**I must confess that I feel like a monster**

**[Skillet - Monster](https://youtu.be/u9NStVkSCuk) **

* * *

The crowd was pumped after that performance. Meg couldn't have prayed for a better lead in. She just hoped she wasn't a let down after that amazing performance. She just had to have faith in her voice and Andrea's kick ass song. She kissed Lu for good luck and applied her black lipstick for her performance. As she took the stage Gotham city lit up behind her. She smiled a perfect feline smile. Oh yeah, she could do this. She adjusted the hands-free mic on her face and checked to be sure the stage was clear around her area. The band was just in plain black long sleeve shirts and black pants. Meg turned, her back to the audience and nodded at the band to begin. She shifted her hips to the beat and only turned around when she started singing.

  
**I want someone I can talk to, all night anytime I want to**    
**Who'll be there when I want and won't be there when I don't want him to be**    
**Who understands it's not easy to understand me**    
**Someone who loves me sometimes bugs me sometimes makes me wanna scream**    
**I need my space someone not in my face, I want somebody**

 **I want somebody I can bitch about**    
**I want somebody I cant live without**    
**I want somebody who can make me insane completely crazy**    
**I want someone who's gonna come and mess me up and make me want him way to much**    
**Sometimes hate me sometimes love me**    
**I want somebody, I want somebody**

 **I want someone I can fight with, and then make up all night with**    
**Someone who makes me mad and makes me laugh and has my back through it all**    
**Someone who loves my flaws and loves me 'cause I'm crazy**    
**When I feel ugly they'll still love me they'll still think I'm beautiful**    
**And when I'm a mess they'll still think I'm the best I want somebody, I want somebody**

 **I want somebody I can bitch about**    
**I want somebody I cant live without**    
**I want somebody who can make me insane completely crazy**    
**I want someone who's gonna come and mess me up and make me want him way to much**    
**Sometimes hate me sometimes love me**    
**I want somebody, I want somebody**

 **Someone who knows when to stay away**    
**Knows how to take my breath away**    
**Knows that no one can love me better**    
**What I need is, what I need is**

 **Somebody I can bitch about**    
**Somebody I cant live without**    
**Want someone who's gonna make me insane completely crazy**    
**I want someone who's gonna come and mess me up and make me want him way to much**    
**Sometimes hate me sometimes love me**    
**I want somebody, I want somebody**

 **I want somebody I can bitch about**  
**I want somebody I cant live without**  
**I want somebody who can make me insane completely crazy**  
**I want somebody I can bitch about**  
**Meow!**  

Meg gestured with her clawed nails like she was scratching the air.

[Kristin Chenoweth-I Want Somebody (Bitch About) ](https://youtu.be/73LIMlnHAO4)

  
When the crowd settled back down Meg said into her mic, "Now, a friend of mine owes me a favor. And it just so happens that the favor coincides with a need we have for an extra performance tonight. Mr. Dean Winchester who is incidentally dressed as none other than Spike himself, please come up here and sing 'Let Me Rest In Peace' from the Buffy Musical Once More With feeling." The crowd applauded.

Dean smiled at Cas and shrugged, "Surprise?" Cas' mouth dropped open but before he could say anything Dean was casually walking up to the stage fully in Spike character. He got up to the mic and Cas had to laugh when Dean said in his bad British accent, "Hello lovelies." The crowd chuckled. When Dean started singing the chuckling stopped and the band came in on the second verse.

 **I died too many years ago**    
**You can make me feel**    
**Like it isn't so**    
**Why you come to be with me?**    
**I think I finally know**    
**Mmmmm**

 **You're scared**    
**Ashamed of what you feel**    
**You can't tell the ones you love**    
**You know they couldn't deal**    
**Whisper in a dead man's ear**    
**Doesn't make it real**

 **That's great but I don't wanna play**    
**Being with you touches me**    
**More than I can say**    
**Since I'm only dead to you**    
**I'm saying stay away**

 **And let me rest in peace**    
**Let me rest in peace**    
**Let me get some sleep**    
**Let me take my love and bury it**    
**In a hole six foot deep**

 **I lay my body down**    
**But I can't find my sweet release**    
**Let me rest in peace**

 **You know you got a willing slave**    
**And you just love to play the thought**    
**That you might misbehave**    
**But till you do, I'm telling you**    
**Stop visiting my grave**    
**And let me rest in peace**

 **I know I should go**    
**But I follow you like a man possessed**    
**There's a traitor here beneath my breast**    
**And it hurts me more than you've ever guessed**    
**If my heart could beat it would break my chest**    
**But I can see you're unimpressed, so leave me be**

 **And Let me rest in peace**    
**Let me get some sleep**    
**Let me take my love and bury it**    
**In a hole six foot deep**

 **I can lay my body down**    
**But I can't find my sweet release**    
**So, Let me rest in peace**    
**Why won't you let me rest in peace?**

**[Spike - Let Me Rest In Peace](https://youtu.be/gJO5l2g6lS) **

  
The crowd cheered wildly. Apparently, no matter how much money you have at the end of the day, fans are still fans. When Dean walked over Cas grabbed him by the lapels of his jacket and pulled him into an alcove. He pushed him up against the wall. Cas' tongue dove into Dean's mouth. His hand cupped the back of Dean's head pulling him still closer while his body pressed him more firmly against the wall. When Cas finally pulled back he said breathlessly, "That was so fucking hot."

Dean's eyebrow quirked up and he grinned, "I can see that. Who knew you had such a hard on for the bad boy?"

Cas chuckled, "It wasn't so long ago you were a rebellious bad boy with a bad mouth, a leather jacket and a hot car." Dean’s smile turned nostalgic.

* * *

**July 10th 1998 - 2:00 AM Las Vegas**

Dean looked over at Cas. Cas' hair was tousled from all the dancing and kissing. His eyes were shiny from alcohol but, it brought out the blue even more. Dean knew they both had had maybe a bit too many drinks but, it wasn't the first time he and the boys had been drunk. Although, he couldn't quite recall if Cas had been there when he had gotten drunk with Ben and Ash and the other guys on the team. Cas hadn't gone out for football when they did, something about studying more. He asked him, "Hey Novak, you drunk?"

Cas laughed and kissed him. "What's the matter Winchester can't keep up?"

Dean smiled. He loved Cas. Wait, he loved Cas. He always had. They were in Vegas, school was over, why shouldn't they start their lives together? He pulled Cas between his legs, "Hey Novak, what do say, you wanna marry me?"

Cas wrapped his arms around Dean's neck and said, "More than anything, Dean." Dean whooped and slapped his leg. He grabbed Benny as his best man, Cas grabbed Ash and ran off to the gift shop to find rings. They got married in one of those twenty-four-hour chapels and then drank more to celebrate their wedding. When they got to the hotel room Dean nearly dropped Cas since he insisted on trying to carry him over the threshold, because Ash told him it didn't count if you didn't do that. After they made love Cas was laying on Dean's chest, spinning the ring around on his finger. Dean told him, "Now don't you go loosing that."

Cas snuggled his head against Dean's chest and yawned, "I won't. Promise you won't ever take yours off?"

Dean kissed the top of Cas' head, "I promise Novak, I'll never take it off."

* * *

**Present Day**

Cas met Dean's eye, "What are you thinking about? You look a thousand miles away."

Dean pulled Cas against him, "I'm just thinking about how much I want to marry you, again."

Cas whispered against Dean's lips, "Me too, more than anything." Dean's mouth crushed down on Cas'. He pulled back and said they should probably go back out to the ball before they were missed, Cas agreed.

The bands each had full filled their obligation of one song so they were free to enjoy the festivities. A DJ booth was set up on stage. Some of the songs played were ‘Monster Mash’, ‘Dead Man's Party’ by Oingo Boingo, ‘Feed my Frankenstein’ by Alice Cooper, ‘Dragula’ by Rob Zombie, ‘Thriller’ by Michael Jackson and everyone danced when The Time Warp came on.

The evening finally came to a close. Cas got up on stage. "Thank you all so much for coming. Let’s have another round of applause for our performers and staff." The crowd applauded graciously even though everyone was tired. "I hope you all had a ghoulishly glorious time and we hope to see you next year. Have a happy and safe Halloween tomorrow. Until next time... ROCK ON!"

Cas pumped his fist in the air. The crowd cheered and the main hall lights came on so everyone could see easier to exit. Cas jumped off the stage his trench floating behind him as he landed. Dean couldn't help thinking Cas looked like kind of a bad ass. Cas walked over and slung his arm over Dean's shoulder "You ready to head out?"

Dean grinned, "After you Angel."

Cas arched his brow, "What's the matter Spike, afraid I might bite?"

Dean leaned in close, "Oh no, I'm hoping you do." He deliberately shifted his coat so it swooped behind him as he walked out the front door. Cas chuckled. Tonight was going to be fun.


	21. Remember When

[Remember When - Alan Jackson](https://youtu.be/2C7WUwtQRkU)

 

Dean and Cas got back to the deli Cas couldn't stop his eyes from drifting over those leather pants. He could not believe Dean would even wear them. Dean had said it was his 'dirty little secret' that he loved BTVS (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) and had always wanted to wear the costume but didn't have the balls. So Cas said they were going to go as characters from that show and Dean took the ball and ran with it. Seeing Dean blonde again stirred something inside Cas. He remembered back to Junior High. Dean had been nearly platinum blonde then, his hair darkened as he got older eventually turning the brown it was before he bleached it to play spike.

  
As soon as they got upstairs Cas pushed Dean up against the counter. He started kissing him. Dean tugged Cas' trench off his body and felt the silk under his hands as he slid them back up Cas' back and over his shoulders. 

Cas growled as he broke the kiss. "I want to fuck you in the shower." Dean moaned at the thought.

He nipped Cas' lip, "You got it, Novak." They removed shoes and clothes as best they could on the way to the shower. As Cas got the shower ready Dean sat down and took off his complicated boots. Then Cas watched as Dean slid the leather pants off his body revealing he was wearing nothing underneath. Cas was immediately hard just watching Dean. He rubbed his cock in anticipation.

Watching Cas rub himself, standing there hard and ready got Dean hard and spurred him into action. He stepped into Cas' space. He kissed him and he led him into the shower. The shower pounded down on Dean and Cas. Dean took the soap and washed away all the sweat from those leather pants. Cas did the same, due to that silk shirt.

  
When they were clean Cas pulled Dean against him and kissed him thoroughly. His tongue ran over Dean's lips entering and sliding against Dean's tongue. Their mouths moved together getting more hurried and more passionate. As their hands began to slide over their wet bodies, Dean bit Cas' bottom lip. Cas moaned, he pulled Deans hips closer to him and ground his cock against Dean's. This wasn't the first, time they had done this. Cas grabbed the silicone based lube. He continued to kiss and bite Dean on the mouth and the neck as his fingers slid inside Dean's ass getting him ready. With every finger, Dean got more worked up. He was panting and moaning. He nails making marks in Cas' shoulder where he tried to hold on but couldn't get a solid grip on his wet shoulders. Finally, Cas turned him around and pressed his stomach flat against the tile, standing up. Dean gyrated and pushed his ass out toward Cas, "Yes Cas, please fuck me now." Cas lubed his cock and eased it into Dean. Dean's body sucked it right in.

Dean moaned, "Mmmm, yes. Fuck, yes, Novak." Cas rinsed his hands under the water then entwined them with Dean's. He lay his body against Dean's and began to slowly fuck him.

It felt amazing to Dean. Cas' hard cock slowly penetrating his ass. Pushing in deeper and deeper. Rolling his hips. His hands covering Dean's. His body wrapped lovingly over him. But Dean had been turned on all night by Cas, he _wanted_... no, he _needed_ it to be hard. 

Finally, he looked over his shoulder, "Cas… Uhm... do we have to go slow tonight? I mean, are you really into it? If you are, it's fine. It feels amazing but..."

Cas arched his brow, "What your saying is..." He thrust hard into Dean. Dean moaned. Cas smiled, "You would rather…" He thrust twice hard. Dean moaned again. Cas hands slipped to Dean's waist and he said right in his ear "… it be hard and rough."

Dean panted out, "Yes, please."

Cas chuckled, "I can do that, Winchester." He kissed him on the cheek. Then he grabbed Dean by the hips and began to thrust at a rapid pace. The shower had gone from hot to warm already. They didn't have a lot of time before they had to turn it off or finish. Cas bet at this rate they would finish first. Cas could never control his dirty mouth when they fucked like this. "You like that? You like when I'm fucking your tight ass? You like me fucking you hard, Dean? Oh yeah, look at you. You're beautiful, bent over, hands on the tile, water hitting your back as I fuck the shit out of your ass. Damn, god damn that's hot."

Dean was moaning and his legs were shaking. Cas had pulled him down till he was bent over and he could feel every quick, hard thrust.

 “ _Yes_ ”, Dean thought, _“This is what I need, this is what I want. Cas, my Cas, fucking me anyway I want, always and forever.”_ Dean's hand slipped down to his cock he began to stroke it. He cried out, "Cas, oh Cas..." Dean came all down the tile and into the tub. His cum dripping down the drain. Cas pulled him once more against his cock and pulled out cumming down the drain as well. They had figured out it was less clean up that way.

They both cleaned off in the lukewarm water and got out of the shower. When they were dry, they pulled on some sleep pants and curled up together in Dean's bed. Dean slipped his chain with his ring from Cas on it over the bedpost to put back on in the morning, Cas smiled. Looking at it Dean started talking. He didn't know why he decided to tell Cas, but he did. He told him all about the night they were married. What they said, how amazingly romantic the sex was, and the promises that were made. Cas got really quiet. When he finally spoke he said, "You actually kept your promise. Even though you stormed off and ran away to god knows where. Even though my dad shipped me off and I never came back. You still never took off your ring."

Dean pulled Cas closer to him, wrapping his arms around him. He kissed him on the top of the head, "You kept your promise too Novak. You never lost that damn ring and you didn't even remember promising." Dean chuckled and Cas laughed too, "I guess you're right. I didn't think about that."

****

Charlie was at home feeling a bit melancholy. She knew Bat had to go they had to finish recording their new album,  _ **Scream It From The Rooftops,**_  in New York. So she couldn't make the trip back from Road Island to Poughkeepsie, then go back to New York where they were recording. It would be murder on her sleep schedule. That doesn't stop Charlie from feeling bummed though. She looked at herself in the mirror, it really was an awesome costume. She had on matching bra and panties underneath (not that anyone would see them, but she liked that she knew they were there.) Charlie was about to get undressed when she heard a knock on the door. She answered it and Bat was standing there. Bat was wearing skin tight blue pants with a red stripe down both sides. Black platform boots, a black belt, a brown blaster holster (complete with Han Solo blaster) that attached from her thigh to her knee. Her top was white and had a series of white belt like buckles on it, it fit like a corset. She had a black, longer vest over the top of that.

Bat leaned against the door jam and crossed her arms. Her smile was slightly arrogant as she said, "What? Were you afraid I was going to leave without giving you a goodbye kiss?"

Charlie's smile widened at the Star Wars line, she stepped closer to Bat, "I'd rather kiss a Wookie."

Bat's arm came around Charlie's waist and she pulled her close, "That can be arranged."

Charlie giggled and grabbed Bat by the lapels of her Han Solo vest. "Get in here," She pulled Bat into her house.

[Bat's Han Solo Outfit](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/f1/6a/e8/f16ae8d2eb16209ca292d98ae4c24ce0.jpg)

 

* * *

  
**1995 Sophomore Year**  

Cas had just returned from summer science camp. It was the first day of school. He and Meg Masters had broken it off over the phone because she said she had met some guy who had just transferred in and he was 'heavenly'. Cas wasn't too bummed about it. He wasn't that into Meg anyway. He just sort of dated her because she was cool and fun to hang out with. He was however a little bummed that science camp ran over into the try outs for football, again, so he had to choose. He chose science camp because his dad was big on education being more important than sports. It wouldn't be that big of a deal, it was just that Castiel played sports with all his friends since they were kids and now he wouldn't be playing football with them.

He decided to be a good sport about it. He went to the field where they would be practicing. On the field he saw Benny and Ash and... oh hot damn Dean Winchester. Cas thought,  _"when the hell did he get so smoking hot?"_ The next thought in Cas' head was, _"when the hell did I think guys were attractive?"_ Everyone knew Dean was gay. It wasn't a secret. Dean was never ashamed of it and it never stopped him from doing everything he wanted to do. Cas always admired that about Dean. Even now, Dean was out there, captain of the team. No one gave a shit if he liked boys or girls. He was and always would be, just Winchester. Cas however needed to address the fact that Winchester made Cas want to roll over and beg.

Cas went about the rest of the day and after school he caught up with Dean walking to his car, "Hey, Winchester wait up."

Dean turned around and Cas' almost lost his breath that smile was so amazing. "Novak! I didn't know you were back."

Dean dropped his bag and gave Cas a hug. Cas hugged him back and Dean felt good, really good.

Cas cleared his throat, "Hey uh.. Dean... I kind of... I wanted to ask... well... to... you know... to talk to you...about something"

Dean raised his eyebrow, "Sure man, you can talk to me about anything. Wanna take a ride to the Hudson?"

Cas nodded, "Yeah that would be good." He climbed in Dean's car. He had just gotten the car. It was a gift from Dean's father. Dean figured it was an attempt to make him 'not gay', but fuck him. Dean loved the car. He didn't have to respect the man who gave it to him. They drove out to the Hudson. Cas unbuckled his seat belt and stared at his hands.

Dean undid his seat belt as well and turned to face Cas "What's up Novak, is everything cool?" Cas bit his lip; he risked a look up into those green eyes. Damn it when did Dean get so...so...perfect?

Cas said, "I  ...um... I think...I might...like...guys."

Dean nodded, "Alright. That's cool. Nothing wrong with that. What makes you think that?"

Cas didn't look at him. He said very quietly, "You."

Dean leaned in, "I didn't catch that, one more time Cas?"

Cas sighed and looked at Dean, "I said...you."

Dean's eyes widened slightly but he managed to keep his composure. "Me? Whadaya mean me?"

Cas shook his head ,"I mean you, Winchester. Just... I don't... you."

Dean rubbed his hand over his mouth, "So what you're telling me is, you were a perfectly normal straight guy. Then all of the sudden today, you saw me and bam, you like guys?"

Cas laughed, "Actually, that's pretty accurate.”

Dean frowned, "This is a pretty fucked up joke, Novak, who put you up to this? Was it Benny? Ash?"

Cas was confused, “I don't know what you mean, seriously."

Dean looked at him, "Okay, prove it. Kiss me."

Cas swallowed. All of the sudden he was very nervous. He couldn't move.

Dean was mad, "What's the matter, Novak?"

Cas looked at Dean. "I'm nervous, could you.. could you..kiss me?"

The anger drained from Dean's face. "You're serious. You really are attracted to me?" Cas nodded. Dean leaned across the seat, he gently took Cas' face in his hands and he kissed him. Cas lost his breath and his heart in that moment. Dean's knee hit the radio as they kissed and Cas would never forget the song that played.

  
**_Katie's sittin' on the old front porch_**  
**_Watchin' the chickens peck the ground_**  
**_There ain't a whole lot goin' on tonight_**  
**_In this one-horse town_**  
**_Over yonder comin' up the road_**  
**_In a beat-up Chevy truck_**  
**_Her boyfriend Tommy, he's layin' on the horn_**  
**_Splashin' through the mud and the muck_**

 ** _Her daddy says he ain't worth a lick_**  
**_When it comes to brains, he got the short end of the stick_**  
**_But Katie's young and man, she just don't care_**  
**_She'd follow Tommy anywhere_**

 ** _She's in love with the boy_**  
**_She's in love with the boy_**  
**_She's in love with the boy_**  
**_And even if they have to run away_**  
**_She's gonna marry that boy someday_**

 ** _Katie and Tommy at the drive-in movie_**  
**_Parked in the very last row_**  
**_They're too busy holdin' on to one another_**  
**_To even care about the show_**  
**_Later on outside the Tastee Freeze_**  
**_Tommy slips something on her hand_**  
**_He says my high school ring will have to do_**  
**_'Til I can buy a wedding band_**

 ** _Her daddy says he ain't worth a lick_**  
**_When it comes to brains, he got the short end of the stick_**  
**_But Katie's young and man, she just don't care_**  
**_She'd follow Tommy anywhere_**

 ** _She's in love with the boy_**  
**_She's in love with the boy_**  
**_She's in love with the boy_**  
**_And even if they have to run away_**  
**_She's gonna marry that boy someday_**

* * *

 

**Present Day**

Cole startled Cas, "Hey man, you just burned the hell out of that breakfast sandwich." The end of  _Trisha Yearwood's --'She's In Love With the Boy'_  was playing on the radio.

Cas smiled. "Shit, sorry. I was somewhere else." He pulled the burnt sandwich off the grill and started another one. "Actually Cole, where's Dean?" Cole points to the back room. "Cool, can you finish this sandwich? I need to ask him something."

Cole smiles a knowing smile, "Sure thing, go on and find your man, I'll just be out here with Garth, picking up the slack."

Garth nods and adds, "like always," they both laughed.

Cas finds Dean in the back he turns him around and kisses him. Then he pulls back and smiles.

Dean says, "What was that for?"

Cas smiles, "For 1996." Cas walks back up to the front leaving Dean to try and puzzle it out.

***

They only kept the Deli opened half day because it was Halloween. They kept some candy behind the counter for early trick-or-treaters and closed up at two pm. As they were locking up Cole and Garth cornered Cas and Dean.

Cole did the talking, "We understand you two have been busy with all of your music stuff and what not but the rest of the day you are gonna spend with us."

Garth piped in, "Yeah, it’s gonna be like old times. All of us hanging out, eatin' candy and talkin’ bout good times. So get your coats fellas, we're goin' to Benny's."

Dean laughed, "Okay, sounds like fun." Cas agreed and they all went over to Love Bites. Charlie and Ash were already there when they got there. Benny had set out jack-o-lantern bowls of assorted candies on the tables. He had a large bin with beer and soda in it. There was also a couple bowls of popcorn set out. Per Garth's request Benny pulled out a TV stand a placed his TV and VCR on it.

Garth set a stack of VHS tapes on the table. He grinned, "Old memories guys." Everyone groaned. "Awe, come on! Y’all will love it." Secretly everyone probably would love watching everyone else, but no one wants to see the train wrecks they were ten or fifteen years ago.

 Charlie shook her head, "I can't believe you kept those Garth."

Garth shrugged, "Why tape the memories if you are gonna get rid of them? I do need to get them switched over to those disks though." The first tape he put in was Prom 1996. It showed all of them dressed in tuxes, even Charlie. Except hers was tailored to fit a female body and underneath she wore a Mrs. Pacman t-shirt. As everyone groaned, laughed and talked about the good, bad and crazy night of prom.

Dean leaned in to Cas and said into his ear, “Remember after prom that year?”

Cas whispered back, "How could I forget?"

* * *

 

**After Prom 1996**

Dean and Cas sat on the hood of the Impala. Cas laying in between his legs facing out toward the water.

Dean said for the sixteenth time, "Are you sure you're ready?"

Cas chuckled he pulled Dean's arms around him. "If you're not ready, we can wait, Winchester."

Dean kissed the top of Cas' head, "No, I'm… I'm more than ready I just… I worry about you. I mean, does it ever strike you as odd that I'm the only guy your into?"

Cas shrugged, "Maybe I just have good taste." He turned around in Dean's arms. "Stop worrying about it. I want you, that’s all that should matter." Cas slid off the hood of the car and took Deans hand. Dean slid off the car. They did most of their undressing outside the car leaving just their boxers on in case they weren't the only one's out there. It was warm enough being the middle of June.

They crawled in the back seat of Dean's Impala which he now called ‘Baby’. Dean had brought what they would need. He lay Cas down on the blanket he had put in the back seat and he leaned down between his legs and kissed him slowly. He moved his body over Cas' while he looked into Cas' perfect blue eyes. Dean's hand came up and he moved the hair off of Cas' forehead. His smile was soft as he looked at Cas. Cas didn't know but Dean loved him. Dean kissed Cas’ neck and nibbled his ear. He removed both of their boxers. Dean really wanted to put his mouth around Cas but there wasn't room in the back seat. _Some other time_ he thought. He stroked Cas and delighted in the way Cas arched his back and moaned.

Cas hissed out, "Yesss."

Dean looked at Cas stretched out before him, "You are so beautiful. How the hell did I get this lucky?"

Cas smiled and said jokingly, "Shirtless football, does it every time." He huffed out a laugh.

Dean chuckled, "I'll have to remember that.” Then his face got serious and he started to ask for the seventeenth time, "You’re absolutely sure ab…"

Cas sat up and kissed him, "I am absolutely sure about this and you, Dean Winchester, now show me what the hell were doing here because I want you."

Dean nodded. He lay Cas back down. Cas was already mostly hard. His little speech had done the trick for Dean. Dean took out the lube he had brought with him he leaned over and began kissing Cas' neck. They had already experimented before so Cas knew what to expect, they just hadn't gone _'all the way'_ till tonight. By the time Dean had three fingers in Cas he was wrecked, pupils blown wide with desire, mouth pink from kissing, cheeks flushed. He was panting, "Now Dean... Please. Please."

Dean pulled his fingers out, wiping them with the baby wipes he brought along. He positioned himself between Cas' legs and added extra lube to Cas' hole and then he lubed up his cock. He rubbed the tip of his cock around the outside of Cas' hole making Cas go berserk. "Dean…  stop fucking with me…"

Dean stopped. He positioned himself over the opening to Cas' ass, "Okay Cas. We’re going to go slow, baby." Cas shook his head no.

Dean looked him in the eyes, "Yes. Trust me, you will thank me later, Novak." Dean slid just the tip in, Cas hissed. Dean waited a second, biting his lip. Cas felt so good, but he would go slow if it killed him. This was Cas' first time and he was going to make it feel good for him.

Cas tilted his hips up making more of Dean slide inside of him he hissed then moaned, "Yes… More Dean please." Dean pushed the rest of the way in slowly. Cas’ legs were on either side of him and Dean was looking down at Cas. He was breathing heavy and Cas felt amazing. He looked incredible too. His hair was tossled. His lip was quivering and he was looking right at Dean his eyes the color of the bluest sky.

Dean said, "You okay?"

Cas said, "I will be, once you start moving." He smiled that gorgeous smile. Dean began to move slowly in an out.

Cas whispered, "Oh my god. That’s amazing."

Dean slightly chuckled, "I'm glad." The whole time they made love they never took their eyes off each other.

When it was over they lay there. Cas was trembling when Dean looked at him he had tears in his eyes.

Dean was worried. "Did I hurt you? Are you cold? Afraid?"

Cas shook his head, "No… no it was… it… it’s just… perfect." He curled around Dean.

Dean nodded, "Yeah… yeah it was." He pulled the blanket up over both of them. That was how the morning sun found them, sleeping, curled up around each other.

 

* * *

 

**Present Day**

Dean pulled Cas close to him, "I love you, Novak."

Cas chuckled, "Home Movies make you nostalgic too?"

Dean smiled, "Something like that."

Garth yelled, "Alright! Now who's up for a game of Twister?" Everyone groaned. Garth would not lose his optimism, "Well… we could always bob for apples!"

Ash stood up, "Twister sounds great, let’s do that." He gave everyone the _'don't be assholes'_ look. Everyone got up to play twister.

 


	22. For The Rest of Your Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The months leading up to the day everyone has been waiting for..... Castiel and Dean's wedding. Yes, it's finally here. Our boys are getting hitched. The wedding is in this chapter. The next chapter will have the reception. After that will be the epilogue.  
> I hope you enjoy their wedding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To my co-author, ZRobnett thank you for saying you had faith that I could indeed write their wedding when I said I couldn't and almost gave up.  
> There are bits I took from an actual wedding ceremony, the hands ceremony is real I just edited it to fit this fic. Their vows I wrote from my heart.

The months following the Halloween ball were busy to say the least. Dean and Cas both ran the Deli like normal. However, Cas now went into the City once or twice a week to make sure everything on that end was running smoothly. Dean hired a young boy, part time, by the name of Kevin Tran to help out. It took a lot of weight of their shoulders when Dean would go with Cas into the city just to relax. Cas had bought another penthouse to use while they were there. Both men decorated the place so it was truly both of theirs.

Zar sent Cas the painting of him depicted as an angel. Cas decided to sell it at a charity auction that Archangel Records held every year. The proceeds went to various shelters across New York. He commissioned a local artist to paint two more pieces. They were of Gabriel and Michael as angels. Gabriel’s wings were a golden brown and Michael’s wings were a deep red.

* * *

Thanksgiving Dean and Cas spent it with all of their friends at their place in the City since it was big enough to fit everyone. Sam and Jess both were there as well. Cas’ partners Gabriel, and Michael, from the record label dropped by with their significant others. Cas couldn’t remember a holiday he enjoyed more than that one. Benny had a surprise for Andrea after dinner. Cas and Dean knew what was going on, but everyone else was surprised.

Benny stood up at the table after dinner was done. He clicked his fork against his Champaign glass and everyone fell silent. Benny took Andrea’s hand and started, “‘Drea, I know we haven’t known each other long. The day you walked in my bar I remember thinkin' I had never seen a woman more beautiful than you. As I got to know you more I realized you were more than just a pretty face. You’re sweet, hilarious, caring, loyal, and incredibly talented. You stole my heart that day.” Benny got down on one knee and held up a beautiful diamond ring. “Andrea Marie Giovanni, there is no one else I could imagine growing old with. Will you marry me?”

Andrea wiped tears from her face and nodded. “Yes, Benny Bear, yes!” Benny pulled her up and kissed her soundly. Everyone erupted in applause and a few cat calls. Andrea laughed and pulled back.

Benny smiled and put his arms around her waist, “Cas arranged a get together a few weeks ago with your brothers and your mom. I wanted to do it the right way and ask their permission first.”

* * *

For Christmas Cas and Dean went to Sam’s in the City. They enjoyed a home cooked dinner made by none other than Jess and Dean. Jess was seven months pregnant by now and was still practically glowing. After dinner, they exchanged gifts. Cas and Dean had bought Sam and Jess plane tickets to Cabo San Lucas. They also included hotel arrangements in with the gift. Cas explained it was open ended so they could plan the trip whenever they had the time.

Dean handed Cas a small wrapped box. They had agreed not to go all out on each other and set a firm limit of ten dollars they were allowed to spend. Cas unwrapped the gift and opened the box. Inside was a key ring with several keys. He looked up at Dean who smiled, “I didn’t want there to be any locked doors in our relationship. So those keys go to the Deli, our apartment, and my baby, the Impala.”

Cas was shocked to say the least. Dean giving him a key to the Impala was a huge deal. No one had ever had a key to it besides Dean. He held the keys in his hand and noticed one was heart shaped at the top. He held it up and asked, “What’s this key?”

“It's the key to my heart.” Dean knew it was cheesy, but he didn't care. Cas kissed Dean slowly hoping to convey what the gift meant to him.

Cas got up and walked over to grab his guitar and asked Dean to sit on the couch. Cas sat down in front of him on the coffee table. “So I know you were curious about why I was spending so much time over at Love Bites earlier this month when Andrea got in on break. Well with her help I wrote this song for you, Merry Christmas baby.” Cas started playing and sang:

 

**People say we shouldn’t be together**

**We're too young to know about forever**

**But I say they don’t know what they're talk-talk-talkin’ about**

**'Cause this love is only getting stronger**

**So I don’t wanna wait any longer**

**I just wanna tell the world that you're mine, boy**

**Oh**

**They don’t know about the things we do**

**They don’t know about the "I love yous"’**

**But I bet you if they only knew**

**They would just be jealous of us,**

**They don’t know about the up all nights**

**They don’t know I've waited all my life**

**Just to find a love that feels this right**

**Baby, they don’t know about, they don’t know about us**

**One touch and I was a believer**

**Every kiss it gets a little sweeter**

**It’s getting better**

**Keeps getting better all the time, boy**

**They don’t know about the things we do**

**They don’t know about the "I love yous”**

**But I bet you if they only knew**

**They would just be jealous of us,**

**They don’t know about the up all nights**

**They don’t know I've waited all my life**

**Just to find a love that feels this right**

**Baby, they don’t know about, they don’t know about us**

**They don’t know how special you are**

**They don’t know what you’ve done to my heart**

**They can say anything they want**

**'Cause they don’t know us**

**They don’t know what we do best**

**It's between me and you, our little secret**

**But I wanna tell 'em**

**I wanna tell the world that you're mine, boy**

**They don’t know about the things we do**

**They don’t know about the "I love yous”**

**But I bet you if they only knew**

**They would just be jealous of us,**

**They don’t know about the up all nights**

**They don’t know I've waited all my life**

**Just to find a love that feels this right**

**Baby, they don’t know about, they don’t know about us**

**They don’t know about the things we do**

**They don’t know about the "I love yous”**

**But I bet you if they only knew**

**They would just be jealous of us,**

**They don’t know about the up all nights**

**They don’t know I've waited all my life**

**Just to find a love that feels this right**

**Baby, they don’t know about, they don’t know about us**

**They don’t know about us**

**They don’t know about us**

**[One Direction - They Don't Know About Us (Actual Artist)](https://youtu.be/zIFo7jKH8tc) **

After the song ended Dean wiped a tear from his face. He pulled Cas in his arms and held him for a long time. When the two broke apart Sam asked Cas if he could speak to him alone. They bundled up and walked out on the balcony overlooking the City. For a few minutes neither man spoke. Cas knew already what this was about so he just remained quiet as he leaned against the rails.

Finally, Sam met his eyes. “Cas look I’m not going to do the whole ‘if you hurt Dean I’ll kill you speech’. It goes without saying.” Sam ran a hand through his long hair. “Just please do me a favor and take care of Dean this time. No running out and hiding for ten years. I honestly don’t think he could survive that again.”

Cas tilted his head, let the words sink in and gathered his thoughts. Sam was like a little brother to him, always had been. So he wanted to choose his words wisely and avoid coming off as a complete dickhead.

“Sam I’ve loved your brother for as long as I can remember. I still love him with ever fiber of my being. I get what you’re saying, I really do. You were fourteen when we married. So there are things you don’t know.” Cas took a deep breath and look at Sam in the eyes. “But, I’ll say this. I’ll never leave him again. As a matter of fact, I wanted to ask you something. I want to do everything the right way this time. I was wondering if it would be okay with you if I took Winchester as my last name.”

Sam smiled, “Why are you asking me this Cas? Shouldn’t you talk to Dean about that?”

“I want to keep it a surprise and tell him on our wedding day. But, I wanted to make sure it was okay with you too. After all by hurting Dean all those years ago I essentially hurt you as well. You were there to deal with the aftermath.” Cas wrapped his arms around his coat.

Sam nodded and his smile grew bigger. “Yeah, Cas it’s fine with me. I wouldn’t have it any other way.” Sam caught Cas by surprise and wrapped him in a big bear hug. “Thank you for coming back Cas.”

About that time the sliding glass door opened and Dean walked out in his winter coat. “What are you guys talking about?”

Sam laughed, “Just brother in law stuff, Dean.” Dean looked at his brother and then Cas who just shrugged his shoulders. Dean kissed Cas on the temple, “Come on you two let’s get back in where it’s warm.

* * *

January they celebrated Dean’s birthday at Love Bites with their friends in attendance. Meg and Andrea were currently on tour but made sure to call the birthday boy. Dean started wedding planning after that. Sam, of course, was chosen to be Dean’s best man this time. Cas asked Charlie to stand by him and be his ‘Best Woman’. She danced around when Cas told her. Then she hugged him so hard Cas thought he would pass out. 

Dean and Cas agreed that it would be better to keep the ceremony part small. They didn’t have to prove their love to the world with a huge celebration. So they decided that they would keep it close friends, family, and Cas’ partners for the actual ceremony. They included a plus one in the invitations.

Cas’ decision to invite his partners brought up an interesting conversation. “I think it’s cool you’re inviting them. I mean they do own a third of the record label.”

“Actually they don’t,” Cas replied.

Dean’s brought his eyes up to Cas’ face. He had been writing down the names of people to invite to the reception after the ceremony. “What do you mean they don’t?”

Cas smiled, “I mean they don’t own a third. They each own a quarter of the label.”

“So you’re saying you own the label,” Dean asked.

Cas laughed and shook his head, “No, I own half of it. After college, I brought up the idea to them. I only had half of the capital I needed to start the label. When I explained it to them they jumped at the chance. Gabriel was a perfect fit because he is outgoing and knows how to talk to people. Michael is level headed and I knew his business choices would make the Archangel Records successful.”

Dean tilted his head mimicking the way Cas did when he was trying to figure out something. “So you’re saying that between the two of us, we own a Deli and half a record company?”

Cas leaned forward and kissed Dean, “Yeah pretty much babe.”

Dean put his finger on his chin, “Hmm I think I can live with that.”

* * *

In late February Sam called Dean to tell him Jess was in the hospital having the baby. Cas drove to the hospital since Dean was a bundle of nerves. He was so excited he was going to be an uncle. When they got there they both sat down in the waiting room. After thirteen long hours of pacing and horrible hospital coffee, Sam came out to find them. Jess delivered a bouncing baby boy and he wanted to introduce the two men to their nephew. In the room, Sam handed his new son over to Dean.

Dean cradled the little boy close and was amazed how perfect he was. Cas stood behind Dean with his arms around his waist and his chin resting on Dean’s shoulder. Jess smiled at her husband and then looked over at Dean. “We named him James Dean Winchester, Jamie for short. We decided together that it would be a beautiful way to honor both of his uncles.”

Cas was speechless and for awhile didn’t know what to say. “He’s named after me,” he finally managed to ask.

Sam smiled and said, “Of course. Dean goes without saying. He raised me and without him I wouldn’t be the man I am today. But, Cas you’ve always treated me like a little brother. You helped me in more ways then you’ll ever know. Hell, you were the one who told me at thirteen that if I wanted to go to Stanford to follow my dream. And had that not happened I wouldn’t have met Jess.” 

Dean handed the baby to Cas and they both couldn't keep their eyes off of him. 

“Do you think you two will ever adopt or maybe get a surrogate,” Jess asked as she watched them practically coo over Jamie.

Cas met Dean’s eyes and they both smiled, “We’ve talked about it. But right now we have decided both of our lives are too busy to bring a child into it. So we will be the best uncles this little boy will ever have.”

Sam laughed, “He only has two uncles. Jess doesn’t have brothers.”

Dean nodded, “I know and I’ll be his favorite.”

Cas scoffed, “I think you meant to say I’ll be his favorite uncle.”

* * *

In March, Dean and Charlie were putting together the final arrangements for the wedding and reception. The cakes and flowers were ordered. The hotel for the wedding and reception had been booked. The invitations had been sent and everyone RSVP’d so they knew how much food to order. The wedding was set for Saturday April 26th, 2009.

Dean mentioned that he wanted to write his own vows. He wasn’t really against using the traditional one but felt if he wrote his own they would make the day more special. Cas agreed it was a good idea and said he would do the same.  

Sam and Jess had bought a home four bedroom home in Poughkeepsie. Cas and Dean helped with the move. Dean was overjoyed to have his brother back home; he truly missed spending time with Sam. They painted one of the rooms a light blue for Jamie’s nursery, complete with fluffy white clouds and an ocean scene. Sam started his own law firm in town and he had faithful clients that continued to use his services. They had even helped spread the word to get _Winchester Family and Entertainment Law_ off to great start. Jess decided to leave her job as a kindergarten teacher to be a stay at home wife and mother.

* * *

A week before the wedding Benny and Cole put together a bachelor party. Love Bites was actually shut down for the night. Ash, Garth, and Sam showed up along with Gabriel. Michael was also invited but declined. He stated that Lilith would have his balls on a platter if he attended. Of course, that earned him some good old fashion ribbing about him being whipped.

The seven men (including Cas & Dean) sat around the bar and drank until their eyes crossed. There were several memories that were told. Most of the memories were embarrassing or were supposed to have been. The rest of the night the men enjoyed each other’s company, drank beer, and sang off-key karaoke.

* * *

Two days before their wedding Dean and Cas drove out to the Hudson to relax. Once the Impala was parked Dean got out and opened the trunk. He pulled out the cooler of beer and sandwiches. They ate on a blanket by the water enjoying each other’s quiet company and the beautiful scene in front of them. After they ate both men climbed onto the hood, Cas leaned back against Dean’s chest between his legs. Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and pressed a kiss right behind Cas’ ear. 

"Thank you, Cas," Dean whispered in his ear.

Cas turned a little to look at Dean's face. He smiled, "For what?"

Dean kissed Cas' hair and said, "For loving me."

Cas leaned into Dean more and replied, "I always will."

* * *

**Wedding Day - Sam's House**

“Sam… Sammy... where’s my boutonniere,” Dean called out from the room in his brother’s house. He had stayed the night at Sam's to keep with the tradition of not seeing Cas before the wedding.

Sam walked down the hall and entered the room with the flower in hand. “Dean calm down would you?”

“Calm down? How am I supposed to calm down? Do you know what today is?” Dean asked waving his arms around. Sam huffed a laugh and gently grabbed Dean’s shoulders to keep the man from pacing.

“Yes, Dean it’s your wedding day, again, and I get to attend this one.” He answered as he wrapped his brother in a big bear hug and then pulled back and pinned the white lily in place. “Just remember to breathe, Dean... I’m so happy for you and Cas both.”

Dean smiled at Sam and turned around to look at himself in the mirror. He was wearing a black pair of jeans and black button down. Sam wore the same black jeans with a white button down and a black tie. His boutonniere; a white lily airbrushed with black.

“Boys come on we’ll be late if we don’t leave now,” Jess called from the living room. The brothers walked out of the room to leave. Jess stood at the front door with Jamie in her arms. She wore a long red dress and Jamie was dressed in a tuxedo romper. Dean smiled at both of them and kissed Jamie’s head. “Let’s go get me married.”

* * *

**Wedding Day - Charlie's House**

Cas stared at his reflection in the mirror trying to get his hair to tame. After the fifth swipe of his fingers, he gave up. Cas wore a pair of white washed jeans with a white button down. The top two buttons were undone of course.

“Aren’t you nervous, Cas,” Charlie asked as she walked in the room and stood behind him. Cas turned around and shook his head.

“No, I’m not, Charlie. I’m ready to get there and marry that man,” He replied.

Charlie grinned at Cas and grabbed his boutonniere; a black airbrushed lily and handed it to him. He pinned it in place then held his arms out opened wide. “Well, how do I look?”

Charlie ran her fingers through his hair messing it back up. “Handsome as always, I’ll be surprised if Dean doesn’t try to hump you in front of the guests.”

Cas twirled his finger to make spin around and Charlie obliged. She looked absolutely beautiful in her classy black jumpsuit that had a criss-cross of white on top. She grabbed her bouquet of white lilies. Cas held out his arm for her and she took it. They walked out of her house and got in Charlie’s car to drive to the wedding site.

She started the engine and looked over at Cas, “Let’s get you hitched.”

**

They were half way to Tarrytown House where the wedding and reception were to be held when Cas’ phone started ringing. He pulled it out of his pocket and didn’t recognize the number. It was definitely an international caller.

“Hello?” Cas said when he put the phone to his ear.

“Bonjour, Castiel, it has been forever,” a female voice said.

“Anna,” he asked in disbelief.

She giggled, “Yes, it’s me.”

A huge grin crossed Cas’ face. “How did you get my number? I mean… ugh. I’m happy to hear from you. I’m just surprised.”

Anna laughed, “Dean contacted me last week. His brother, Sam I believe? He helped Dean find me. I was shocked to say the least but overjoyed. I wish I could be there today, to see you get married.”

He swallowed around the lump that formed in his throat. “I wish you were here too, Anna. I can’t believe James let you call me.”

“I broke free from father years ago Castiel.” She sighed. “But he refused to give me a way of contacting you. I live in Paris now. I moved here to attend school.” Anna paused, “Maybe I can come visit and meet that husband of yours?”

Cas looked out the window and said, “Yes, you should.”

“I’ll start planning it then, possibly around one of the holiday vacations from school.” A silence stretched out for a minute. “I love you, Castiel.”

“You too Anna, I love you too,” Castiel replied.

A smile could be heard in Anna’s voice as she said, “I know you have a big day ahead of you so I'll let you go. Au revoir.”  

* * *

Dean pulled the Impala through the iron gates of the Estate. The stone pillars of Tarrytown House are what drew Dean to the place. It was breathtaking, with the gardens, and a beautiful view of the Hudson. The 19th-century looking hotel was surrounded by wooded bluffs and lush gardens. He parked and was ushered through the doors by one of the assistants handling the wedding today. She informed Dean that Cas had already arrived. He wanted to talk to Cas before the wedding but wasn’t sure how that would work without seeing him. She told him to follow her and led him outside of a sliding door. The lady, Cecilie, turned him around backed him up against the wall so he couldn’t see inside. Cecilie walked inside the room and did the same with Cas and then joined their hands together and stood just out of earshot facing them to make sure they wouldn’t peek at each other.

“Dean? Is everything okay? You’re not getting cold feet are you,” Cas asked jokingly.

Dean huffed a laugh, “I’m fine, Cas. I just wanted to hear your voice before the ceremony. Are you getting cold feet?”

Cas laughed, “Hell no. You’re never getting rid of me, Winchester. Are you sure you can handle that?”

“I’ll hold you to that, Novak,” Dean said and squeezed Cas’ hand.

Another woman, Karissa, informed Dean that it was time to head out to the garden and start the ceremony. One last squeeze to Cas hand and then Dean followed the ladies.

* * *

The statue garden was a beautiful sight. Four paths met in the middle and formed a circle with a statue on each side a little further out. Their guests Jess, Jamie, Cole, Benny, Andrea, Meg, Lu, Ash, Garth, and Bat were seated on white lined chairs.The officiant nodded his head when Dean and Sam joined him.  

A violinist started to play and Dean looked up as Charlie walked down one of the paths, her smile beamed. She stood to the right of the officiant. The violinist’s song slowed and Cas appeared at the end of the same path. Dean’s breath hitched and locked eyes with Cas as he walked towards them. It seemed like time stood still until Cas was finally beside Dean and they both faced the officiant.

“Good evening everybody. Welcome to the Tarrytown House Estate, and to the wedding of Castiel Novak and Dean Winchester. I’m Chuck Shurley, a New York State wedding officiant. It is my honor to be officiating this union. Before we begin, please turn the volume of your phones up as high as possible, so that when somebody gets a phone call during the ceremony we all know whom to blame. Alternatively, please silence your phones. Before we begin, I would like to acknowledge the guests who are attending today in spirit.” Dean knew that was put in there for his mother. He wiped a tear from his eye.

“Let’s begin with the hand ceremony. Castiel and Dean, please face one another and take each other’s hands.”

Dean and Cas smiled as they faced and held hands.

Chuck said, “These are the hands of your best friend, full of love for you, holding yours on your wedding day. These are the hands that will scratch your back when you have an itch you can’t reach. These are the hands that will help decorate your Christmas tree. These are the hands that will dial your number just to say hello – when you’ve been missed throughout the day. These are the hands that, at times, will want to strangle you. These are the hands that will passionately love and cherish you through the years. These are the hands that will hold you for comfort and tickle you for joy. These are the hands that will wipe the tears from your eyes. These are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch.” This time they both had to wipe away a tears.

“Castiel and Dean have written their own vows. Dean, will you begin,” Chuck asked.  

Sam handed Dean the ring he bought for Cas. Dean took a deep breath and looked into those deep blue eyes that he fell in love with. “Cas, I take you to be my best friend, my partner in crime and my one true love. I promise to encourage you, inspire you and to love you truly through good times and bad. I will forever be there to laugh with you, to lift you up when you are down and to love you unconditionally through all of our adventures in life together. I vow to fiercely love you in all your forms today, tomorrow, and forever. I’ll be your biggest fan and your most loyal supporter. I promise not to love you for the rest of your life, but for the rest of mine.”  He slid the ring on Cas’ finger.

Charlie handed over the ring. Cas looked at Dean and smiled as he started. “Dean, you are the love of my life, the missing half that makes me whole. Today I ask you to be my husband, my partner and my strength, for the rest of my life. I promise to be loyal to you. I will strive to bring out the best in you and to always see your greatest strengths. I will stand beside you as you achieve your dreams and help you pursue your heart's desires. For you, I will be the best possible version of myself, every day as your husband. I promise to never forget that this is a once in a lifetime love.” Cas slid the ring on Dean’s finger and smiled.

“Now may those who wear these rings live in love all their days,” Chuck said. “I asked both Castiel and Dean to sum up their relationship in one word. I can honestly say that for the first time ever asking couples this question; they both used the same word: love. That is what has brought us here today, love plain and simple. It has been my honor to officiate your ceremony this evening. And now I get to say something you’ve been looking forward to hearing for a long time. By the powers vested in me by the State of New York, I now pronounce you married. You may kiss your husband.”

Cas grabbed Dean by his shirt and pulled Dean to meet his lips. Everyone whistled and yelled, “It’s about time.”

When they pulled apart Chuck said, “Ladies and Gentlemen introducing to the world, Dean and Castiel Winchester.” Dean looked over at his husband surprised.

Cas smiled and said, “I decided to take your name, Dean. We’re doing it the right way this time.”

Dean had to wipe another tear away, “Damn pollen making me tear up.”

Cas chuckled and kissed Dean again. Then they walked hand and hand together inside the hotel. Cas pulled Dean off to the side before going in the room where the reception was. “Dean… Thank you for finding Anna.”

“You’re welcome babe,” Dean said and kissed Cas softly.

“Oh and I want to go ahead and tell you what your gift is. I couldn’t wrap it,” Cas said after the kiss broke. “I bought the other half of the building to the deli. I’m turning it into a studio. That way I can handle most of my work close to home.”

Dean gave Cas a thousand-watt smile, “That is the best present ever.”

Castiel laughed and reached for Dean’s hand again. “Let’s get this part over with so we can get to the honeymoon.”

[Chapter Title Inspiration - Train - Wonder What You're Doing For The Rest Of Your Life](https://youtu.be/X-Qf-WjIj0A)

 


	23. You're Still The One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ‘For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The majority of this was written by ZRobnett  
> I just finished the end.... I hope it does this story justice.

[Song Title - Still the One - Shania Twain](https://youtu.be/fMmqh4Ut_Uo)

After the ceremony the guests, along with the arriving 'reception guests' which consisted of the Leviathans, the rest of the members of the Phallic Hosts and the Lonely Hunters, were all shown into the garden area for cocktails. The cocktails were what you would expect; except for one drink that Benny created for the event called the  _Hometown Hottie_. You take a shot of Fireball whiskey and drop it into a glass of Angry Orchard apple beer and down the drink.  Cas had asked earlier in the week why Benny hadn't created a drink for him. Benny said there already was one; it was a Jack and coke, that made Cas laugh.

As the guests enjoyed their cocktails Cas and Dean were shown into the reception area. The photographer Melanie Ellis wanted to get some pictures of the guys before the guests were in the building. Cas and Dean agreed it was a good idea. They chose her as their photographer because her ad was too cute. It had a beautiful picture of a bride at sunset, the sun reflecting off her ring; the wind gently blowing her hair back as she looked out over the city with a soft smile on her face. Next to it was a terrible photo taken of a bride where the sun reflected off the back building blocking out half her face, the wind blew her hair into her face and her dress wasn't even straightened. Under the photo, it said 'Pick Ellis or Else'.

As she was setting up she called Cas over to talk about a couple shots she wanted to take. Dean was standing by the table of food and the smell alone was making him salivate.  _Renee's Requiem of Food_  had catered the affair and from the smell it would be delicious. Renee herself walked up and stood next to Dean. "How are you holding up?" She asked him with a gentle smile. 

He shook his head and said softly, "Truthfully, I'm starving. But Cas says we can't eat till we have pictures, then the guests come in, then we all sit down THEN we can eat." 

Renee gestured with her head to her hands behind her back, "Here. Eat this quick, before someone sees you." She was holding a small pie in her hands.

Dean took it and turned so Cas couldn't see. "What kind of pie is this," he asked, his eyes alight with wonder. 

Renee grinned, "It's a cheeseburger pie." 

Dean's eyes widened, "You mean to tell me you put a cheeseburger, into a pie?" 

Renee nodded, "Yep. Now hurry, I'll keep watch while you eat it." 

Dean took a bite and as the warm cheese spilled into his mouth he moaned, "Renee if I wasn't gay and married, I'd purpose." Renee giggled. When she looked back the pie was gone. She handed a napkin to Dean, then used another to wipe a bit of cheese off of his lip. Just as she had taken the napkins back and tossed them Cas came over. "What are you two talking about?" He asked as they both had the ‘cat-that-ate-the-canary’ look. Dean replied, "I was just telling her how amazing everything smells." Cas agreed and told Dean that Melanie wanted them on the dance floor for a photo. Dean nodded. He gave Renee a hug, kissed her on the forehead and whispered, "Thanks, you’re a life saver" She winked and shooed him off. 

Melanie took her time positioning the guys perfectly on the dance floor. She stepped back, took a couple shots then sighed. "Something isn't right," She said. Then it hit her she said, "Cas, look at Dean and remember the first time you knew you loved him." Cas' eyes came up and he looked at Dean. But he didn't see his husband standing on a dance floor in an empty room, he saw Dean Winchester, Captain of the football team kiss him in the back of the Impala. Cas smiled, his blue eyes shining with love. It made Dean take a breath. Melanie smiled widely and snapped the shot. She asked Dean what is his fondest memory with Cas. He told her sitting on the hood of ‘Baby’ watching the Hudson as the sunset. Melanie draped the camera around her neck and pushed the two men out the back door. "Come on guys, were losing daylight," she said impatiently. As they got outside she switched lenses, looked through her camera at the view and smiled to herself. She had her assistant, Bob, bring the Impala around and park it in a perfect spot. With the sun setting Dean crawled up on the hood of Baby and Cas snuggled between his legs. Melanie had them lay their hands just so, on Cas' raised knee so you could see their rings. She took a few black and white photos of them catching their profiles and the clear definition of two people deeply in love enjoying the sunset. 

Satisfied with the posed shots, she said she would take more candid shots during the reception but that the boys were free to go enjoy their party. Cas hugged her and said she was as great as they expected. She blushed and said, "Oh stop it, go on, your man is waiting." 

Cellar 49 was all set up for the guests to sit and enjoy the delectable food and drinks as well as play some darts or pool. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The guests and grooms were allowed to eat finally. Dean was shocked and delighted with how every piece of artistically done he put on his plate. There were the cheeseburger pies of course. There also were apple cinnamon tacos. Dean thought it tasted like someone had put an apple pie in a taco. Mini pizzas with sausage and bell peppers were served as well to commemorate their first official date. There were deep fried mashed potato balls with a sausage gravy dip that Dean couldn't even believe was possible. For those that didn't want an immediate carotid attack from all the grease and fried foods. They also had waffle cones filled with fresh fruit. Honey lime chicken kebabs and fresh veggies served in cute little wooden crates lined with butcher paper. There were small packets of dressing for those that wanted it for their veggies. And the Pièce De Résistance, the three-tiered wedding pies, done up to look like cake. It had burlap wrapped with a W for Winchester on top.  The bottom tier was pecan, the middle was apple and, of course, the top was cherry pie. 

   

After dinner, the boys got up to cut the cut the pie but Ash stepped onto the center floor with a mic in his hand. “Now to the grooms, Garth and I have put a little somethin' together for ya. We'd like to show y'all it now before all the hoopla upstairs if you don't mind?

 

Cas and Dean shook their heads," Go ahead Ash," Cas said as he and Dean sat back down. Garth jumped up excitedly and ran behind a curtain for a second. After a couple seconds, the lights went dim and there was a white square projected on one wall. "Uh oh," whispered Dean. Then the [music started playing](https://youtu.be/6rBV410zU0E) and a slide show began to play as well. It started with a third-grade school photo of all of them, then the camping trip. It just proceeded on throughout their live, football practice, Driver’s Ed, Mary Winchester’s funeral, drunken Vegas wedding pictures, Dean and Cas together...always together. The song played on _ **:**_

****

**_When I first saw you standing there_**  
**_You know it was a little hard not to stare_**  
**_So nervous when I drove you home_**  
**_I know being apart is a little hard to bare._**

**_Send some flowers to your work in hopes_**  
**_That I'd have you in my arms again_**  
**_We kissed that night before I left_**  
**_Still now that's something_**  
**_I could never forget_**  
**_You've got all that I need_**

**_Looking at all or nothing_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and I_**  
**_With you I know that_**  
**_I am good for something_**  
**_So let’s go give it a try_**  
**_We got our backs against the ocean_**  
**_It`s just us against the world_**  
**_Looking at all or nothing_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and I_**  
**_Looking at all or nothing_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and I_**

**_Let's take a chance go far away today_**  
**_And never look back again_**  
**_Since I said I loved you in Las vegas_**  
**_It`s never been the same since then_**  
**_You've got all that I need_**

**_Looking at all or nothing_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and i_**  
**_With you I know_**  
**_I am good for something_**  
**_So let's go give it a try_**  
**_We got our backs against the ocean_**  
**_It`s just us against the world_**  
**_Looking at all or nothing_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and I_**  
**_Looking at all or nothing_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and I_**

**_This is it nothing to hide_**  
**_One more kiss never say goodbye_**  
**_This is it baby your all mine_**  
**_Looking at all or nothing_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and I_**  
**_I know that I am good for something_**  
**_So let's go give it a try_**  
**_We got our backs against the ocean_**  
**_It`s just us against the world_**  
**_Looking at all or nothing_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and I_**  
**_With you I know that_**  
**_I am good for something_**  
**_So let's go give it a try_**

**_We got our backs against the ocean_**  
**_It`s just us against the world_**  
**_Looking at all or nothing_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and I_**  
**_Looking at all or nothing_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and I_**  
**_Babe, it`s you and I_**

[All or Nothing - Theory of a Deadman](https://youtu.be/6rBV410zU0E) 

There wasn't a dry eye in the house. Dean got up and hugged both men. Cas shook his head, "When did you guys come up with this, and who's the band?" Ash shrugged, "Already been signed Cas, they’re called Theory of a Deadman. As for the rest; well Garth thought it would be cool ‘cause he had all those old videos to put together a gag reel for the bachelor party. I said, 'what if we put together a real one with some sick music for their wedding’? Garth thought that sounded chill so, here it is." Garth gave them a wide grin, "I'm glad y'all like it, we worked real hard on it." Dean smiled, "We loved it, good job guys." 

The traditional part of the evening would take place upstairs. The desserts would be served for everyone. Along with the dancing and where the toasts would be given in the [Ballroom](https://www.google.com/maps/uv?hl=en&pb=!1s0x89c2eb28c4d56e79:0xf6dd786c406a7d94!2m5!2m2!1i80!2i80!3m1!2i100!3m1!7e1!4shttps://picasaweb.google.com/lh/sredir?uname%3D102015319804208886616%26id%3D5724974398672881826%26target%3DPHOTO!5s+-+Google+Search). So since the pie cutting had been delayed they decided to transport that as well and cut it up there (one advantage to a pie cake is that it doesn't topple like a traditional cake when slightly moved.)

When they got to the ballroom it was decorated beautifully; little white hanging bulbs and black and white accents. The only real colors that seemed to be in their wedding party. Cecilie had done a wonderful job. Next came the pie cutting. I suppose one would think that a pie would be less messy than a cake, but oh no. Dean and Cas each cut a small slice. Dean put whipped cream on the top of his and shoved it into Cas mouth. There was cherry glaze and whipped cream all over the outside of Cas' mouth. That wasn't the worst of it, though; Dean's quickly followed. His tongue lapped up all the sugary cherries and sucked the whipped cream from Cas' bottom lip. Cas couldn't care less if people were watching at that point. He let out a little moan. Dean pulled back smiled and said, "Your turn." Cas looked at Dean, he looked at the pie in his hand, he looked around at the wedding guests as if he just realized they were there, "Oh, here take your damn pie." He placed it into Dean’s waiting mouth and Dean took it, sucking on Cas' fingers and chuckling. The guests clapped and some laughed or cat called. Renee brought Cas over a warm washcloth to get the rest of the sticky of his face and his and Dean's hands he was grateful.

Renee and her staff cut up and plated the pies; then separated them on black white and silver plates to determine flavor. She also had a special pie that was split 3 ways to include all three flavors that she planned to send the boys on their honeymoon. If there was one thing she learned from their consultation for the wedding was DEAN LOVED PIE. Cas was a pretty big fan too.

The DJ Announced it was time for the grooms to dance their first dance together as a married couple. Cas smiled at Dean and extended his hand "You ready Winchester?" Dean grinned "I've been ready Novak." As they walked to the dance floor Cas pulled Dean in close he laid his cheek beside Dean's. "I'll love you forever Dean Winchester." Dean sighed with contentment, "And I'll love you one-day longer then that Castiel Winchester." The music began to[ play](https://youtu.be/WfS4hqKcPbw) and they moved to the beat slowly rocking each other and holding tightly to their one true love. Cas leaned back a little so he could mouth the words of the song to Dean.

****

**_Highway run_**  
**_Into the midnight sun_**  
**_Wheels go round and round_**  
**_You're on my mind_**  
**_Restless hearts_**  
**_Sleep alone tonight_**  
**_Sendin' all my love_**  
**_Along the wire_**  
  
**_They say that the road_**  
**_Ain't no place to start a family_**  
**_Right down the line_**  
**_It's been you and me_**  
**_And lovin' a music man_**  
**_Ain't always what it's supposed to be_**  
  
**_Oh, but you stand by me_**  
**_I'm forever yours, faithfully_**  
  
**_Circus life_**  
**_Under the big top world_**  
**_We all need the clowns_**  
**_To make us smile_**  
**_Through space and time_**  
**_Always another show_**  
**_Wondering where I am_**  
**_Lost without you_**  
  
**_And being apart ain't easy on this love affair_**  
**_Two strangers learn to fall in love again_**  
**_I get the joy_**  
**_Of rediscovering you_**  
**_Oh, but you stand by me_**  
**_I'm forever yours, faithfully_**  
  
**_Oh, oh, oh, oh_**  
**_Faithfully, I'm still yours_**  
**_I'm forever yours_**  
**_Ever yours, faithfully_**

 [Faithfully - Journey](https://youtu.be/rj__jhmPMgI)

The crowd cheered as the song came to a close. The men smiled and shared a quick kiss before they walked off the dance floor and sat down. Sam tapped a fork against his wine glass. “Hey everyone, I’m glad we could all make it here to celebrate this day together. It means a lot to me as I know it does to my brother and my old… new brother in law.” That earned a chuckle from the guest. “Dean you have been the best big brother I could ever ask for. You stepped up and took care of me even though you didn’t have to. I wouldn’t be the man I am today if it weren’t for you. I’m sincerely thankful for that more than you will ever know. I have watched you give of yourself unconditionally and never ask for anything in return. Today I watched you marry your best friend again. I’m so happy you both found your way back to each other. I believe the love you share is truly a once in a life time love. Cas, thank you for coming back and loving my brother unconditionally. I love you guys.” Dean wiped a tear away from his eye. Sam grinned and sat down.

Charlie stood up and smiled over at her friends. “What can I say to the two most amazing men I know? We grew up together and became closer than any other family I’ve known.” She flicked her eyes at Cas. “Thank you for being my best friend Cas. I couldn’t have asked for a better one. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Cas replied. Charlie then focused on Dean. “Dean you’ve been the big bother I’ve never had and sometimes never wanted.” The guests laughed at that. “I love you Dean.”

“I know,” Dean said and grinned at her.  

It was time to leave for their honeymoon. The guests assembled outside and waited for the grooms to exit. Hand in hand Dean and Cas ran out and their friends threw bird seed at them.  Sam brought the newly decorated with condoms filled with air Impala around. On the back glass, it said ‘Just Married…. Again’. Dean walked to his brother and hugged him tight. Cas shook Sam’s hand once Dean released him. Jess kissed both men on the cheek.

Dean and Cas slid into the Impala and waved to the crowd. “Be careful guys,” Sam called out to them. The engine started with a roar and they pulled out of the gates and onto the street. Cas slid his hand in Dean’s and smiled as he watched his husband drive. His husband. Damn that sounded good to him. Yeah, they were married before. When they were kids and he didn’t know how to truly appreciate the man sitting beside him. Now though he gets to hold him for a lifetime. 

Dean glanced over at Cas. “So where are we going?”

“Sin City baby, Vegas,” Cas answered.

They were stopped at a red light and Dean threw his head back and laughed. “Returning to where it all began huh?”

Cas nodded and chuckled, “Yeah pretty much. I figure we’ll enjoy it more this time around.”

* * *

Later that night they checked into a hotel along the way. After they showered and changed out of their wedding attire they crawled into bed. Dean looked at his new ring. It was a simple black titanium band. Cas had a matching one but his hand silver bands on the outside. “I had something engraved on yours,” Cas told him.

Dean smiled and kissed his husband, “I did the same for yours.”

Each man slipped the band off their finger and looked inside. Cas’ had been engraved with ‘Winchester’ inside in silver letters. Dean’s was pretty much the same except his said ‘Novak’.

That night they made love, slow and passionate. It was amazing these two men survived a shit storm and found each other again. Each man knew how lucky they were and promised to take care of each other till their last breath. No matter what came their way they would make it as long as they had each other.

_When I lay with him, you know what it feels like? If feels like I'm safe. It feels like no one can hurt me. I'm under his warm embrace. Feeling his muscles around my waist, my body being pulled closer to his... the feeling is indescribable. When they say it's the best feeling ever, they aren't kidding. Because at that moment, when we're sharing our body heat, there isn't a place I'd rather be or a single thought that crosses my mind that doesn't involve him. When he gives up all his 'manly' pride to just hold me close to his heart like this, is when I realize that he truly does love me. And I need to not let it go to waste._

_‘For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.’_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, it's done. Thank you to everyone who has been there from the beginning and the new readers that have come along the way.
> 
> Zara thank you so much for sharing this journey with me. You are more than my co-author, you are my best friend. Between thousands of Facebook messages, hours on the phone, and a million changes to this story, we did it together.
> 
> I may do an Epilogue for this later :)


End file.
